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Fanfiction ► Things KH Characters Would Never Say!!!! REBORN!!!



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Sora is Barbie

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:cool:Goofy: No Sora, thats not the way you figure out the area of a circle. Please try again, and remember to use "Pie R Squared".

Sora: Don't make me use this Keyblade, you hideous example of botched genetics.

Riku: PARACHITE PANTS ROCK MY SOCKS!!! *becomes a cheerleader* Give me an R! I! K! U! What does that spell?! RIKU!!!! like, w00t! *becomes a preppy blonde*

Laxerne: Why am I the only chick in the Organization? Those sexist perverted bastards......... ><'

Ariel: I want to have sex with a penguin......


 

DaRkNeSs2LiGhT

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Sora Oblivion DX said:
Sora: Ansem!!!!!


Ansem:*with sunglasses, a big chain, a long white tee shirt, a du rag, a white cap and baggy blue jeans* YO Sora dizzle mizzle fizzle sizzle crizzle. I'll beat you with my hammer and chizzel.


Sora: o_0


*Riku comes up* Riku: DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEE Chyea, wassup.


Ansem: Yo, waddup G


Riku: Uhh, I dunno dude, like what. *looks up* like I think a big blue thing dude.

Sora:o_O

Ansem:Yo homie, duh man dat's da sky

Riku: Chyea dude. Rock on

Sora: O. O



Ansem: Anyways, YO Sora, my nizzle I'm about to whoop your bizzle fo shizzle


Sora: SHUT UP AND FIGHT!!

Ansem:Homie don't play that

Sora attacks Ansem


Ansem: OOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW. Yo I'ma get my crew. YO PIMP SQUAD!!!!!


Millions of heartless come dressed in the same thing as Ansem.


Heartless: *in high squeky voice.* Yo man,wat u want now. I aint playin wit u I'ma kick yo pasterior all da way to Kalamazoo

Sora: *walks away shakin his head* They're messed up..............................fo shizzle

AHAHAHAHAHAAA!!! THATS THE BEST!!!! <3 XD
 

Enchanted Rose

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Sora: Ou est la plumme de ma tante?
Kairi: Thunder and lightning very very frightening. Galileo Galileo
Riku: Yeh but no but yeh but the phantom of the opera!

( I relize this isn't funny but @ least it's relevant to the discussion)
 

Sora is Barbie

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:cool:Sora: Hey um....Kairi.......how bout you and me go to the Secret Place by the waterfall so I can explore your keyhole??? *lick lick* ~_^

Kairi: No chance Sora. This Mary Sue has got a date with Yuffie. ~_^ *purrs*

Vexen: I am so confused about my sexuality.......... *breaks down and cries*

BHK: Man Sora, being your guardian SUCKS. You're boring, I'm outta here. *leaves while Sora gets corrupted by insane amounts of darkness*

Axel: My hair is so amazing. It's red, AND defies the natural laws of aerodynamics.

Aladdin: SADDAM HUSSEIN FOREVER!
 

Mikail

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Sora is Barbie said:
:cool:
Aladdin: SADDAM HUSSEIN FOREVER!

lmao... thats great


Sora: Okay, where done with this world. Lets go to the next
Goofy: Yea
Donald: Dude... wheres my Gummiship?
Goofy: Where's you gummiship dude?


Wakka: So Sora, up for a fight?
Titdus: Yea, us two again you Sora.
Sora: sure lets go
Kairi (yelling): Sora! Come here I have to ask you to get something for our raft!
Sora: Uh.. sorry guys I have to go
Tidus & Wakka: *make sound of a whip*
Sora: I'm really sorry guys, I cant
*sora leaves*
Tidus: Little B*tch
 

Machinany Gun

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(Alice in wonderland world. In front of the Queen of hearts Sora stands before her)

Queen: Any evidence to prove alice's innocence

Sora: yep its right here!

(Pulls out keyblade and hits the queen on the nose using strike raid!)

Queen: OWWWWWW! Guards! Get them!

( Guards are in middle of being played with in poker by donald, goofy and the chesire cat )

Sora: C'mon alice!

Alice: Ok.

*while running outta there * Sora: One thing though!

Alice: What?

Sora: You lose that really annoying accent!

Donald: Won't bringing her be meddling?

Sora: Well as the keyblade master my word is law and since i say she stays its law!

Donald: F***in P****
 

(~Perfection_Achieved~)

Rikku's Heart and Soul...
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Sora's in his room bored out of his mind, then looks in his mirror. He smiles, then looks around. He stands
Sora: "Oh, girls, just wanna have fun, yes girls just wanna have fun----"
Kairi stands in the doorway.
Kairi: Um I uh... just came to drop of the dress you--your mom asked for.
Sora: Hey it's not how it looks!!
Kairi: yeah.... right... uh see ya later...
drops the dress on Sora's chair and walks out.
Sora: Awww!!! Shoot!! hmmmm...
looks at the dress and smiles.
As Kairi looks back at Sora's window she sees him in the dress singing "What a Girl Wants".
Kairi: Such a sad sad sex deprived child....
 

Tre'Coolfreak13

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Sora is Barbie said:
Goofy: No Sora, thats not the way you figure out the area of a circle. Please try again, and remember to use "Pie R Squared".

Sora: Don't make me use this Keyblade, you hideous example of botched genetics.

Riku: PARACHITE PANTS ROCK MY SOCKS!!! *becomes a cheerleader* Give me an R! I! K! U! What does that spell?! RIKU!!!! like, w00t! *becomes a preppy blonde*

Laxerne: Why am I the only chick in the Organization? Those sexist perverted bastards......... ><'

Ariel: I want to have sex with a penguin......



XD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Those were great!!!

Mickey and Riku are walking down the road of dawn. Riku trips, and falls eyes first into a cactus.
Riku-AAA!!! I'm blind!
Mickey-Mother f***er, you were already blind. Remember, you had the hangover from the Heartless party, I made the orb of light, remember?
Riku-Oh yeah. Good times, good times.
BHK pops up out of nowhere.
BHK-That was five minutes ago you damn idiots!
Mickey-Was it? Hey Riku, we're still hungover.
Riku-*Wipes more of Mickeys puke off of his shoes* I noticed.
BHK-And I'm your concious.
Riku-I thought that was Jiminy.
BHK-Nope. And I'm here to remind you never to drink again. *Pulls out Oblivion and Oathkeeper*
Mickey-Oh, s***! He's gonna kill us!!!
BHK smiles and screeches the Keyblades together.
Riku&Mickey-AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!
BHK-There, now you'll never drink again.
Riku&Mickey-X_X

Deep Dive

BHK runs up the building.
BHK-Why do we have to shoot this in the rain? This buildings slippery! *Throws Oblivion to Riku* Oh, s***! I forgot he's blind.
Riku-*Get's hit in the groin by Oblivion
eek.gif
In squeeky voice* DAMN!!! *Falls to the ground and is eaten by the NEO Shadows.
BHK-*Reaches top of building*
Mickey-*Takes a swig of whiskey* Ah! That's good stuff.
BHK-Mickey! It thought I told you never to drink again!
Mickey-So? I'm the f***ing king of f***ing disney f*** castle f***er.
BHK-Fine! *Cries* You can take back your stupid key then! *Throws Reverse Kingdom Key at Mickey, who get's hit in the head by it*
Mickey-*Falls of the building* AAAA!!!! *Grabs Keyblade, then does a graceful flip, and neatly lands on the ground* Oh yeah, that was cool. *Is trampled by elephants*
 

Tre'Coolfreak13

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Sora and the gang arrive at Hollow Bastion for the first time.

Sora-I think I know this place. I have this feeling, right here.
Donald-Oh, you're just hungry.
Sora-Uh...I don't know...*PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTT*
Donald-Oh! Sweet mother of God!!! I can't freakin' breath!!!
Goofy-X_X
Sora-Haha.
 

Sora is Barbie

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:cool:Sora: Damnitt Riku! I wanna name the boat! ME ME ME ME ME ME! *cries like a little baby* >_<

Riku: Cmon Sora, you lost the race. I get to name the boat. Plus, I fell of the tree and I still beat you!!!

Sora: Dude. You're freakin' pixilated. You don't "feel pain" when you fall, you're a f*ckin program! Ain't that right, Kairi?

Kairi: *while using Paopu Fruit-shaped tampons* Sora. Just shut up. I'm on my period, I don't need this bullsh*t. *walks away*

Zexion: My hair is purple. Purple is for girls.......meh, if ya can't beat em, join em. *loses penis*

Vexen: Thats exactly what I said Zexion. Now, I feel like I BELONG somewhere. *walks away with nothing but a bra and thong on*

Donald Duck: I guess all those Ritalin pills really DO mess up yer voice... >_>

Mulan: GOT RICE?


 
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