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Fanfiction ► KingDumb Hearts



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Every Heart

Here We Go Again
Joined
Dec 5, 2004
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Inside an empty room, my inspiration flows, now wa
Every Heart: I have decided that just for my own purposes, we'll do Wonderland first.
Sora: Whatever floats your boat, it doesn't really matter to me.
Riku: Uhh...Every, theres something I've been meaning to ask
Every Heart: Which is?
Kairi: Uhh..Sora, we should leave, I think that this is gonna get weird and ugly.
Sora: *being dragged out* I wanna see what happens!!
Every Heart:....so what exactly is it that you are trying to ask?
Riku: Well, Sora's got Kairi, and I was thinking...well...maybe....if you would go out with me?
Every Heart: o_O Wow, that's really...unexpected. There's only one small problem.
Riku: What? What could be the problem?
King Naruto: *walks in* Hey love, I got you your coffee. Maybe we could go see a movie later.
Every Heart:.....I'm already seeing someone. Sorry Riku. Meet King Naruto.
Riku: Your dating this guy?? I thought you had better taste!
King Naruto: What did you say?
Riku: Yeah! You heard me Yankee! Every's mine! And I'm willing to fight to the death for her! *jumps him and they fight*
Every Heart:.........*slowly backs out of the room to the same room that Kairi and Sora are in*
Kairi:....And anyway, it's wrong Sora
Sora: So I may have done some crack lines off her leg while she was asleep, so what?
Kairi: Well, I think she'll kick your ass when she finds out.
Every Heart: Who are you talking about?
Kairi: Sora tricked Lindsey Lohan into coming over to his place. And he did some pretty unspeakable things. One of those things involved Dr. Phil.
Sora: So what was going on between you and Riku?
Every Heart: Riku was asking me out. But then my boyfriend walked in and they got into it.
Kairi: Oh. Well, let's just film the Wonderland part.
Every Heart: Not right now, I'm too distracted from what just happened.
Sora: Who's winning?
Every Heart: It's kinda hard to say, seeing as how Riku just choke-slammed him and King Naruto practicaly body-slammed him.
Kairi: So what do we do while we are waiting for them to stop fighting?
Every Heart: Well, on my way driving over here, I passed a dead body in the creek. Let's go poke it with some sticks.
Sora: Awesome!
*everyone leaves except for Riku and King Naruto*

Yeah I know, laziness. Get over it.
 
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Every Heart

Here We Go Again
Joined
Dec 5, 2004
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Inside an empty room, my inspiration flows, now wa
Taokitty said:
Yes, and watch as the body opens up with each scratch of it's saggy decaying skin, and watch as veins and internal organs come up and dry blood!>.< xP
Click to expand...

What a...vivid mental view on that.....

Sora: *on the gummi ship* Come on! Let me drive!
Donald: No! Your too drunk to drive.
Sora: Speak for yourself, your alcohol level is higher than mine!
Goofy: That's why I'm driving.
Sora: Yours is higher than his!
Goofy: And I'm also sexier than you two.
Sora: o_O Whatever. Look, a new world. The sign says Wonderland.
Donald: Sounds like a drug faction to me to name their place Wonderland.
Sora: Let's go see.
*parks next to hole*
Goofy: I guess we go down this hole.
Donald: Your right Goofy. *pushes Goofy in*
Sora: *trips Donald and causes him to fall in* Enjoy your trip! See you next fall!
Donald: Why you! *grabs him by the leg so that Sora falls in too.*
*The groups falling. Goofy does some kind of weird perverted backstroke in the air o_O as he then lands on his ass while Donald and Goofy land on their feet*
White Rabbit: I'M LATE! I'M LATE! I'M SURELY LATE. IF I DON'T GET THERE IN TIME HER MAJESTY WILL CUT MY HEAD OFF! I'M LATE I'M LATE I'M LATE!*disappers around the corner*
Sora:.....Hey Goofy, you won the bet, I think we ran into someone who's more screwed up as you.
Goofy: *from far off* Pumpernickel is a funny word.
Sora: Nevermind. But oh boy, that guy is going to get his head cut off! I can't wait to see that!
Donald: Don't want to miss that, lets go!
*finds self in bizarre room*
Sora: Yo Door, open up! We want in!
Doorknob: YOU MIND? I'M TRYING TO SLEEP! Damn kids......
Sora: Well screw you then. Looks like we're going to miss out on the decapitation of that rabbit dude.
Donald: NOT ON MY WATCH!
Sora: Your not wearing a watch.
Donald: Shut up and get me that bottle up there.
*all three drink*
Sora: Hey, I'm small! Watch this! *graps a lollipop* We are the Lollipop kin, the Lollipop kin, the Lollipop kin, man, I have always wanted to do that since watching Wizard of Oz.
Goofy: At least your taller than Every Heart.
Every Heart: WHAT DID YOU SAY DOG HORSE THING? *jumps him and beats him up*
Riku: *from off stage* Your not suppossed to insult her height. Otherwise you end up looking like me.
Kairi: *off stage* I thought you were born that way *laughs* No seriously, isn't those injuries from that slap down that her boyfriend gave you?
Riku: Do not speak of it! It was a fine day, since I wooped his ass.
Kairi: You were crying on the way to the hospital.
Riku: Yeah, well no one asked you.
Every Heart: Just continue please. AND IF I HEAR ONE MORE CRACK ABOUT MY HEIGHT, THAT PERSON WILL BE BREATHING THROUGH A TUBE!
Riku: Just like that beating she gave Don Patch. Although I heard that he was realeased from the hospital and went back to working on his fanfic.
Kairi: We must be the hospitals favorite customers.
*Moving on, the group is walking up and hears whats going on at the trial*
Alice: I'm innocent I tell you! I didn't steal your heart! I'm not a freaking vampire or whatever the hell it is that steals those!
Sora: *snaps fingers* It's Mike Eisner who steals hearts, not vampires.
Donald: You mean the guy who owns Disneyworld?
Sora: Yeah, that guy.
Queen: On the crime of attempted theft of my heart, your sentence? OFF WITH HER HEAD!
Alice: No!! Go decapitate the rabbit!
White Rabbit: Why is it always me that everyone wants to decapitate?
Sora: Hold it right there! Alice is innocent! It wasn't her! It was Mike Eisner...either that or the hear....
Queen: Do you have any evidence?
Sora: Well, he works at Disneyworld for starters and the previous owner hated the Jewish community and to think you would be employed by someone like that.....
Queen: Not about that, the second suspect
Sora: Err....no
Queen: Find some evidence and then we will see.
*locks Alice in cage*
Sora: This....is retarded. *sees Alice in the cage* Before I find that evidnece, I'm definately gonna get a piece of that.....

Will Sora find the evidence needed to set Alice free? Will Mike Eisner...err...I mean....the heartless be brought to justice? Will the rabbit get decapitated? Find out next time on KingDumb Hearts!
 
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Every Heart

Here We Go Again
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New Chapter!

Sora: Anyone have any idea what this evidence looks like?
Goofy: Got me
Donald: No clue
???: It's because your not looking in the right place, and your not asking the right people.
Sora: Who's there? Show yourself!
*cat appears in front of them*
???: I am the Chesire Cat I am!
Sora: What did you mean about what you said earlier?
???: I only repeat what I say once. *throws Sora a box* Here's one evidence, go find the rest! If you ask around, your sure to have a helping hand! But will that hand be a hand that you want to be helped by?
Sora: Wha?
Chesire Cat: If you don't, poor Alice will be missing a head. *disappears his body except for his head* And we surely wouldn't want that, would we? *disappears completely*
Donald:.......I think I speak for everyone here when I say that that was the most screwed up cat we have ever seen.
Sora: We gotta find the evidence just like the cat said. He said that we need to ask around.
Goofy: Well, there's a sign. "The Madhatter's"
Sora: We want to consider asking someone who's considered insane by the state?
Donald: It's worth a shot.
*the three go there*
Madhatter: Want some tea?
*That one rabbit whose name I can't remember, we'll just call him Jack*: And sing the unbirthday song with us?
Sora: Guys, I just figured out why he's insane.
Donald: Why?
Sora: He's gay and they sing and drink tea. What pussies!
Goofy: If we drink tea with you, will you give us the evidence?
*Jack*: Sure sure!
*the three sit down*
Sora: *drinks the tea* This tea tastes like as if Kairi made it!
Kairi: Don't make me hurt you Sora! *shouts this offset*
Donald: I think it tastes like as if Riku took a dump in it.
Riku: *shouts* For all you know!
Goofy: I think it just plane tastes like crap!
Madhatter: YOU DARE DISS MY TEA! *pulls out dangerous hammer* DON'T MAKE ME HIT YOU WITH THIS!
Sora: Err I mean...great! If we could just take that evidence and go, that would be appreciated.
*Jack hands him the evidence box*
Jack: And now to sing the Unbirthday song!
Goofy: Gawrsh, what's an unbirthday?
Donald: You had to ask??
Madhatter: OH MY GOD! HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW WHAT AN UNBIRTHDAY IS? EVEN ME AND JACK WHO HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 12 YEARS KNEW ABOUT SENSE THE FIRST TIME WE MADE OUT IN BED........
Jack: Uhh, he's a little nutty sometimes....
Madhatter: OH COME ON! IT'S ABOUT TIME YOU CAME OUT OF CLOSET!
Sora: Uh guys, Unbirthday?
Jack: Right right, an unbirthday is a day that isn't your birthday.
Sora: Really? That means that it's my unbirthday! I want an IPOD!
Donald: Mine too! I need an MP3 Player!
Goofy: I'd like a hooker!
*everyone turns to look at him*
Goofy: Err, I mean I need an Xbox
Jack: Sorry, we don't have those things. But what we do have is a song! OH HAPPY UNBIRTHDAY HAPPY UNBIRTHDAY TO YOU!
Sora: Cheese it, we got to get out of here!
*they all run off*

Next time on KingDumb Hearts, they will ask around for more evidence. I couldn't think of anything more right now at the moment.
 
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