Help/Support ► Deaf Bipolar Bestfriend

[party@usualspot]

as the title says, my best friend is deaf and bipolar. We're like brothers and his family has become my escape from my own (because i cant rele rely on them but thts another issue). Well we've gotten in a bunch of fights because he goes up and down in his mood swings a lot. But he's always come around. So back at the end of May, he got a new girlfriend. I figured they would break up pretty fast like he usually does, but they lasted until now and still going at it.

we hadnt tlked much throughout june because he was in arkansas with his dad. Well, he just got back two weeks ago and we hung out a couple times. And he seemed completely normal, actually more happy than usual! But then he left for a 2 week trip to the beach and his girlfriend's family just happened to be camping at the same beach.

Then Wednesday, he texted me and told me he didnt need a friend anymore. It has nearly destroyed my heart because everything i do and care about revolves around my few close friends. Me and his gf are friends because he had been mad at me b4 for not approving of his gfs, so i befriended this one and we got close. We were tlking bout it and she was helpin me cope, both of us hoping he would come around soon. (he's in a bad spell of bipolar). Well then he told us tht we couldnt to each other anymore, but we did anyways and today he found out and i'm afraid he may never come around now. And idk what im gonna do. Last time i lost a best friend, 4 years ago im still hurtin from it. Plz give me some help or just comfort. I rele need it right now.

 

[impart]

yeah. I know what its like to louse a best friend.

I also know what its like to live with bipolar people.

dont worry too much kay
he WILL come around

if he loves you, eventually he will be able to think rationally about it. just sit it out and dont worry

 

[ThePromise]

He didn't need a friend anymore?..

Hahaha, oh god do I NOT know what to say. I wanna be helpful, but I also wanna insult him.

 

[loke13]

as the title says, my best friend is deaf and bipolar. We're like brothers and his family has become my escape from my own (because i cant rele rely on them but thts another issue). Well we've gotten in a bunch of fights because he goes up and down in his mood swings a lot. But he's always come around. So back at the end of May, he got a new girlfriend. I figured they would break up pretty fast like he usually does, but they lasted until now and still going at it.

we hadnt tlked much throughout june because he was in arkansas with his dad. Well, he just got back two weeks ago and we hung out a couple times. And he seemed completely normal, actually more happy than usual! But then he left for a 2 week trip to the beach and his girlfriend's family just happened to be camping at the same beach.

Then Wednesday, he texted me and told me he didnt need a friend anymore. It has nearly destroyed my heart because everything i do and care about revolves around my few close friends. Me and his gf are friends because he had been mad at me b4 for not approving of his gfs, so i befriended this one and we got close. We were tlking bout it and she was helpin me cope, both of us hoping he would come around soon. (he's in a bad spell of bipolar). Well then he told us tht we couldnt to each other anymore, but we did anyways and today he found out and i'm afraid he may never come around now. And idk what im gonna do. Last time i lost a best friend, 4 years ago im still hurtin from it. Plz give me some help or just comfort. I rele need it right now.

Let me get this straight your bipolar friend txted you and tells you he doesn't want to be friends with you anymore? Your BIPOLAR friend?

Don't know how much of this decision is because he's bipolar i'm assuming you've done nothing to incite his rage, therefore this is NOT your fault. Do not feel guilty, do not feel sad. He he wants to stop being friends with you there is nothing you can do about it, I suppose you can try talking to him but if that doesn't work? Fuck him and move on.

 

[party@usualspot]

Yeah, we think he got so used to havin his gf around him 24/7 where he could hang out with her, 24/7. Which in turn made him think she was the only person in the world he needed. But i hate to be rude towards their relationship, but he's 3 years older than her and i HIGHLY doubt they'll stay together forever. And when they break up, he won't have anyone to go to for remorse because he pushed me and everyone else away.

 

[impart]

well you can wait for them to break up, and be there for him.

if your in highschool, chances are they wont go much more than a year, at the most

 

[party@usualspot]

Yeah and @loke13 its his type of bipolar (yeah theres different types). One of the things he does, is he picks out the the thing tht matters most to you and does harm to you in some way (emotional or physical). And in my case, it's our friendship. I was expecting him to come around like normal, but because of the gf situation, idk how its gonna work out.

 

[Solar]

Can he read lips ?

 

[Crimson Crusader]

I deal with this kind of drama all the time.

Just chillax, man. He'll come round real soon. It's just his bipolar attitude acting up. When he does come round, tell him in a nice matter that he needs a little help. You can't deal with what happened again and your afriad it will if he don't get help.

 

[Weeaboo]

My family is bipolar. One minute we're all at each other the next we're laughing.

Really, just still talk to her. She's your friend. And it may turn out he might just be the type who doesn't like their girls having other guy friends.

If push comes to shove, just tell him if he wants to act selfish or something, then he should just find a new friend, if at all possible.

 

[party@usualspot]

Can he read lips ?

Yeah he can. And he's not totally deaf, he can hear a lil bit if ur close to him.

 

[Jesus]

he sounds like he's jealous of you
i think your probably better friends with his gf then him now....

 

[party@usualspot]

Not until he said he didnt want to be friends anymore. Before that his girlfriend always seemed kinda of annoying and possessive of him. But he liked the attention.

 

[Professor Ven]

To be honest, I'd just tell you to let it go. I know it might be hard and make you feel as though you've lost a part of yourself, but you'll make it in the end. My ex-girlfriend and best friend of three years ex-communicated me not to long ago, and I haven't bothered talking to her since. I just accepted that she'd be a b**** to me from now 'til she realized what she did was wrong (if she ever realizes).

The game of LIFE is about taking the crappy spins and to keep going forward, even if you wind up with crap in the process.

 

[party@usualspot]

Man, now he's saying that I called him off a private number saying he only cares about his gf and that she's stupid. He told his sister this, who told me. And he said I need to 'toughen up' and call him off my own number. So I did but he ignored the call. Well then he started texting me making a big fuss about it. And i just got fed up and basically told him to leave me alone. I had already decided a few days ago that I wasn't going to make any attempt at being his friend or talking to him. I had even blocked his gf so we wouldnt be able to talk about him. Then she texted me a while ago calling me a liar because apparently i said on this phone call tht i nvr wanted to be friends with her in the first place. So i once again had to explain i never did that and she still hasn't texted me back. I now have no desire to be his friend anymore. If he decides he comes around, then ok. but i'll never be as close to him as I was. He's too immature and he's prolly lying about this whole phone call situation.

 

[Taylor]

Glad to see you got over your pain, I suppose. I'm sure there's a way to save the friendship if it means so much to you, but that's really up to you. Considering he's bipolar, it's hard to take everything he says to heart, especially because you don't know how he's feeling right now. He goes up and down, and can think differently than you.

Totally up to you if you want to try and make it better, but it doesn't look like that's working out.

 

[party@usualspot]

Yeah, if we become friends again, it'll have to be after he comes out of this low period. and today his gf was saying stuff about how my other friend was saying she 'stole' him away from us. and this kid is NOT the type of person to say anything like that, he has no desire to cause conflict. So I think my ex-friend is lying about it. It's bad enough tht I have to lose him, but I don't wanting him causing issues with my other friends!