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A New Stage, and a Fateful Goodbye..



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Twilight Lumiair

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Evening everyone 👋...

So I've been dropping hints about this for the past couple of months, wondering how I was finally gonna say it, but... starting tomorrow, I'm gonna be away for a while. Not forever, I'm sure, but long enough that I thinks it's only appropriate to make this post. I've recently made a huge commitment in regards to my future, and it's going to take all the focus I can spare to push through the struggles and hardships I'm sure to face really soon. I just won't be able to spare the time unfortunately (plus there's little internet access where I'm going anyway, lol). I'm posting this to get some closure on my experiences with KHInsider these past few years, and hopefully leave things somewhat happily. This is just as much an appreciation post as it is a goodbye, afterall.


I think in order to best sum up just how much of an impact this forum (and it's users) has truly made on me, it's important to start at the beginning. Don't worry, I'll try and keep it concise, lol.

Growing up, I was something of a really quiet and anti-social kid, who didn't really get to talk about my personal interests that often. For as much as I love them, my friends and family rarely (if ever) shared my interest & love for most topics, and whenever I tried to get them into certain things, it was always met with a lot of backlash and dismissive scoffing (my lackluster social skills certainly weren't helping matters either). The constant rejection eventually lead me to bottle up my thoughts and emotions whenever I felt enthusiastic or excitable, which resulted in some intense day dreaming and long conversations with myself. Needless to say, I was miserable in that regard, and I desperately needed some form of catharsis to relieve all my suppressed feelings and creative ideas. Then came the thought: If I couldn't find meaningful discourse with people in person, perhaps I should look online?

I had been familiar with online forums for a while at that point, but my low self-esteem and weak social skills made me incredibly hesitant to even consider joining one.. That is, till about August 2017 rolled around, and I finally decided to take a leap of faith and try reaching out to one of the sites. At first I wasn't sure which site would be the best to join, but after I gave it some more thought, the choice became obvious. I won't go into the specifics for why, but let's just say that I had a certain user to thank. ;)

My early days on KHInsider simultaneously included the most relieving, and nerve wracking moments of my life, lol. I still wasn't the best at formulating my thoughts, and my confidence was really, really fragile (in hindsight, I suppose both of these things likely stemmed from my lack of experience talking with others who cared about the series). A lot of early debates and conversations were so terrifying that they led to numerous anxiety attacks and breakdowns while I was at school. It was.... hard (I even came to subconsciously resent certain users, even though I know they didn't mean any harm). But as my mind adjusted and the as the discussions became easier, I found myself being a lot more vocal and open with people in my day to day. Not just on the forums. Before I'd even realised it, the fear of bringing up my interests to others quickly melted away, and soon I felt happier and more fulfilled than I'd been in years. All that consistent communication also helped my conversational skills skyrocket from the pitfall they'd been trapped in for so long (I couldn't believe how much I was debating with my peers after that, lol), and seeing certain users make such intelligent and well-worded posts quickly became THE example for how I strived to speak in my social life overall.

In the end, I wouldn't be nearly as open and engaging as I am without the KHInsider Forums, and I really can't thank all of the wonderful people here enough for helping me through that struggle. If I could pay you all back somehow, I would in a heartbeat. Thanks so much for all the wonderful memories, and I'll be sure to keep you all in my thoughts during these next chapters of my life 🧡

Special thanks to these kind folks, for being such incredible friends and inspirations to me over the years (hope you all have a blessed future):
@maryadavies @Sephiroth0812 @alexis.anagram @SweetYetSalty @FudgemintGuardian @Oracle Spockanort

P.s.- In case it wasn't clear, I'll be here till tomorrow afternoon for those who were interested in saying goodbye, but don't feel obligated. =)
 
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FudgemintGuardian

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I'm not good at long goodbyes, so I'll keep this short.


I mean, yeah, it's not like you'll be gone forever, but you're absence will be felt. I've had so much fun talking with you, and you better take care of yourself or else I'm gonna clobber you. ;A;
 

Eonstar890

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Really well written and heart touching :)

I haven't been around all that long but it was nice to hear your input in the time that I have been! I'm glad the forums gave you the outlet you needed at that point in your life. I hope you have the best of luck in this next chapter!

Thank you for being around while you were 😊
 

SweetYetSalty

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I enjoyed reading this. I hope to see you back on here in the future, as I always love reading your post and hearing your thoughts on things. Take care and I'll be looking forward to your return :)
 

Twilight Lumiair

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I'm not good at long goodbyes, so I'll keep this short.


I mean, yeah, it's not like you'll be gone forever, but you're absence will be felt. I've had so much fun talking with you, and you better take care of yourself or else I'm gonna clobber you. ;A;
Aaaw, don't cry-- you're gonna make me cry 🥺
Promise I won't get myself into trouble. You don't have to worry about me.

Talking to you has always brought so much levity to my day. I'm really gonna miss it.. so try not to lose that meme-y spirit of yours, alright? I don't like imagining you unhappy. And... sorry I could never get to that request (it wasn't anything special anyway, lol).

Really well written and heart touching :)

I haven't been around all that long but it was nice to hear your input in the time that I have been! I'm glad the forums gave you the outlet you needed at that point in your life. I hope you have the best of luck in this next chapter!

Thank you for being around while you were 😊
Thanks Eon. It was always pleasant talking to you, and I'm glad you managed to enjoy my input from time to time (despite how cynical it often was, lol). The community is definitely a better place with you here, so keep engaging, and make a name for yourself. 👍

I enjoyed reading this. I hope to see you back on here in the future, as I always love reading your post and hearing your thoughts on things. Take care and I'll be looking forward to your return :)
Looking forward to seeing you again too, whenever that ends up being. Thanks for always supporting me. You're kindness and assurance have always been a real comfort. Keep smiling, ok? 😁
 

FudgemintGuardian

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Aaaw, don't cry-- you're gonna make me cry 🥺
Promise I won't get myself into trouble. You don't have to worry about me.

Talking to you always brought so much levity to my day. Try not to lose that meme-y spirit of yours, alright? I don't like imagining you unhappy. And... sorry I could never get to that request (it was silly anyway, lol).
I'll try!😭

It's quite alright, dude, and it's NOT silly! Before you replied, I wound up drawing something relating to it so you had something before you leave.
 

Dast

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I have hardly been on here very long at all but I will miss you being on here. You make really good points and know so much about the series and you argue clearly but without being rude, which is really nice. I wish you all the best in your future.
 

Sephiroth0812

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You'll do what you must friend and when that needs nearly all available energy and time available then so be it. ;)

I know a thing about such situations as well yet I didn't manage to do such a well-written long goodbye post regarding my almost total absence last year so you are better in this than I am.

All the best to you and may everything you chose to commit to turn out successful in the end.
 

Twilight Lumiair

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I have hardly been on here very long at all but I will miss you being on here. You make really good points and know so much about the series and you argue clearly but without being rude, which is really nice. I wish you all the best in your future.
You'll do what you must friend and when that needs nearly all available energy and time available then so be it. ;)

I know a thing about such situations as well yet I didn't manage to do such a well-written long goodbye post regarding my almost total absence last year so you are better in this than I am.

All the best to you and may everything you chose to commit to turn out successful in the end.
Heh... I'm actually crying now. Great, lol. Gonna miss you guys SO much 😣 Thanks for all the warm wishes. You really don't know how much it means to me. Take care 🧡
 

Face My Fears

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I'm really happy that the forum was able to help you face your fears and be a sanctuary for you. I wish you a simple and clean exit, and definitely don't think twice about coming back to check in!

I understand how hard it can be to meet people and actually verbalize your thoughts, let alone finding people that actually care about your interests, so always know that KHI is here when you need to talk about KH. I joined this forum because most people around me didn't like KH (thought it was a stupid game) and was more interested in shooting games or those crappy movie tie-in games from the mid-2000s, so I didn't really have anyone to talk to about my theories (obsessive theories) about KH. I wish you all the best and hope that you keep feeling better and better about yourself!
 

Soldier

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Another person who felt the same way I did, and suffered with the bottled up emotions no less. All these wasted days, for what.
Shame I missed the opportunity to compose this, but if I've learned anything on this forum is that everything comes back to this place, you'll be back one day, and when you do, you'll see this message.
And if you see it before then, dont forget,
"The guardian is invincible to all manner of attacks"
You said it yourself one day.
Arrevederchi Luminar.
 

Noivern

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I only saw this now, but you'll be missed! I haven't been here for long but you were one of the people I liked to interact the most throughout all the crazy theorizing ever since KH3 came out. You're already gone by now I suppose, but I hope you have a good time with whatever project you're involved with from now on :)
 

Rydgea

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I always thought you were quite well spoken, knowledgeable and kind. You were a welcome presence on the boards, and I'm glad you were able to find a voice here. I know it isn't easy to emerge from (the security or harm) of our inner dialogue at times, but it's definitely relatable. I wish you all the best. Stay safe and healthy, and come back to us sometime.
 
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