Me refusing to fight you on account of your own idiocy is hardly 'winning'. Not to mention I'll still treat you like I always do (possibly worse now that I've actually had to roleplay with you) until you can provide me a genuine reason not to treat you like shit.
No, shapeshifting is fine, but the immunity to punches and ability to create seemingly infinite number of clones, not to mention tiny little portals that don't turn me to mince meat as I pass through all seem like Godmodding to me.
There's already a thread set up for new members in the foyer, the Newb Adoption Agency. So it's probably best to stick to greeting people in their threads, and applying for a position at the NAA if one opens up.