No, it is nothing to do with my mental instability, forcing me to take it out on any forum community with my cynicism.
Anyway. Ever since the New Year and seeing my fiancée off who has to get ready for University, I have been spending my week, doing the shit I wanted (with doing some work. Not in a rush, I have an entire week where no lessons, so I'm doing all the work), the effect of loneliness has affected me more than I thought. I did feel lonely throughout my university semester, but I always went to Uni, was busy with work, come home and I talk to my fiancée on Skype.
But this time, the loneliness hits me. I miss having a presence. But I always miss that. I usually convince my friend to come up and I make food for him, all to combat the loneliness I have, because I kinda like being with people. I joined up a couple of clubs in Uni, but I stopped going to them because I wanted to catch up on work... and the more weeks I missed, the more I'm iffy to come back.
I even began looking at pets on the internet. I really want a dog. I really want a cat. Because that way, I don't have to be lonely. I kinda even broke down to my Dad today on the phone because he kept prodding me to see what's wrong because I didn't phone him.
But I don't like clubs. I like to keep inside a warm room. I like to talk about geeky or funny things. Hell, I'd like to have a couple of rounds on a game. I'm generally a boring person and the friends I have... well, they can't hang around because they have to go home a city away, so I have one friend to rely on.
I don't know if it makes me clingy or whatever. I'm generally an independent person and I can survive without contact for a couple of days. But it's been a week now and it's driving me crazy.
I don't know how to combat it.
Anyway. Ever since the New Year and seeing my fiancée off who has to get ready for University, I have been spending my week, doing the shit I wanted (with doing some work. Not in a rush, I have an entire week where no lessons, so I'm doing all the work), the effect of loneliness has affected me more than I thought. I did feel lonely throughout my university semester, but I always went to Uni, was busy with work, come home and I talk to my fiancée on Skype.
But this time, the loneliness hits me. I miss having a presence. But I always miss that. I usually convince my friend to come up and I make food for him, all to combat the loneliness I have, because I kinda like being with people. I joined up a couple of clubs in Uni, but I stopped going to them because I wanted to catch up on work... and the more weeks I missed, the more I'm iffy to come back.
I even began looking at pets on the internet. I really want a dog. I really want a cat. Because that way, I don't have to be lonely. I kinda even broke down to my Dad today on the phone because he kept prodding me to see what's wrong because I didn't phone him.
But I don't like clubs. I like to keep inside a warm room. I like to talk about geeky or funny things. Hell, I'd like to have a couple of rounds on a game. I'm generally a boring person and the friends I have... well, they can't hang around because they have to go home a city away, so I have one friend to rely on.
I don't know if it makes me clingy or whatever. I'm generally an independent person and I can survive without contact for a couple of days. But it's been a week now and it's driving me crazy.
I don't know how to combat it.