Dream: Much as I hate to say it, Kingdom Hearts do not belong to me. Though I really wish I could have Riku-kun... but anyway, here's kind of how things are going: This is set in an alternate reality to the games, and Riku is twenty-two while Kairi, Sora, Roxas and Namine are all twenty-one. It's Christmas Eve, but something is horribly wrong, and the evening is about to take a morbid turn for the worse. What's gonna happen? Read and you'll find out. And please, play this song: Tell Me I was Dreaming by Travis Tritt. It is an extreamly gorgeous song, and is what this chapter was based around.
It was the night before Christmas. Snow was falling in a thick white blanket, so that the little town soon looked like a gingerbread village with icing layered on it. Light shone through many windows, causing intricate patterns to fall on the powdery snow; inside, many families where gathered around glowing trees, singing carols or just enjoying the tranquility of the season. It was Christmas Eve, the most serene day of the year.
But on the outskirts of the little hamlet, the wind whipped the snow into flurries that stung on bare skin. The lights from the windows failed to penetrate the darkness here; the only light came from the full moon. She gazed down with sad eyes as she saw the young man struggling away from the light and warmth of the village, pressing on towards the cold, harsh countryside instead. She knew what was to come; she had seen this too often as she stood sentry over the earth. It caused her deep suffering to see this tortured soul shunning the help and compassion of his fellows. She knew that no balm could cure his savaged heart, but she still wished that she could gather him close and console him. She watched as he pushed on, past the point of caring anymore. She feared this path that he was on, for she knew that it lead only to self-destruction.
His silvery, shoulder length hair whipped out behind him as a small whirlwind hurled frozen shards of snow into his face; but he just ignored the icy sting as he continued up the slope. He was past feeling physical pain anymore; his senses had become numb to anything other then the wrenching pain of loss that filled him so completely. Dull ocean blue eyes watched the snow covered ground as he trudged on. There was once a time when those same slanting pools of sapphire had been full of a bright, laughing light, a time when he never would have entertained these dark thoughts that were racing through his mind now. But he felt that, without her, there was nothing left for him. It had been building for weeks, threatening to break it's bonds like a swollen river strains a dam. But the final straw was having to spend Christmas alone, without friends, without family. Without her. His tortured mind couldn't take it anymore; it was too much pain to go through, trying to live when the uncertainty of a lonely or non-existent future pressed closer for them both.
Without meaning to, his thoughts traveled back, back in time. Back to a beautiful autumn night, with the fallen leaves dancing in the moon's light, when she was shining down on the young lovers, a gay light in her merry eyes. The sun's rays might not penetrate the clouds as effectively, and the first signs of winter would nip at their skin, but the couple didn't care. All that mattered was their time together.
Watching the waters of the stream twist and churn down the small waterfall, she suddenly asked, "Riku, have you ever thought about the future? I mean, life's just as changing as this stream; it twists and flows all the way, but you can never go back the way you came. Each day is another day in your life, and you grow older; no matter how much you wish you could, you can never go back to yesterday. So really, all there is is the future. What do you think of tomorrow?"
Smiling, he met the blond's shining, pale blue eyes as he said, "What brought this on, Namine? Why are you so full of questions about tomorrow when today's not even over?" He had trouble hiding a chuckle, because he knew that she was just like this. Questions seemed to pop out of her at odd moments; but those spontaneous queries seemed to almost always have a deeper meaning to them.
Shrugging, the trim girl replied lightly, "I don't know, really. I just got this feeling all of a sudden that life is just so short; we could be gone tomorrow, things happen that fast." Glancing at the stream again, Namine said softly, "I just have this feeling that something bad is going to happen, and I won't be here for Christmas. Weird, isn't it?"
Sensing how upset she was, Riku pushed himself off the fallen log he was sitting on and moved closer. Wrapping his arms gently around her shoulders, he said in a soft, low whisper, "Nothing lasts forever, we both know that. But don't worry, I'm sure you'll still be here. I'll protect you, pretty thing, I promise."
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Shaking his head, Riku found himself laughing as he said sourly, "'I'll protect you.' I promised that, didn't I? But how could I protect you from the accident when I wasn't even there in time? I couldn't stop that ass from drinking; or from getting behind the wheel when he knew he was too plastered to see straight. I should have been there, Pretty Thing; I should have been with you or stopped you from going out that night. I shouldn't have gotten mad, Namine; it was my fault." Slowly, despairingly, he struggled on, even as, once again, his thoughts went back. But they didn't travel as far back as before; but this time, he revisited a memory from the beginning of the month.
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Things had just been going bad for Riku the first of December, so that by the time he was supposed to pick Namine up for their date, he was about ready to kill. He'd already given Sora a fat lip and a black-eye to match it; and they were supposed to be best friends. His temper was short enough that he pretty much barked at her for being late when he went to get her.
Getting her own dander up, she retorted, "What do'you mean, I was late? You where suppose to be here half an hour ago. So what're you yelling at me for?"
One thing led to another, so that they were soon in a huge fight that had nothing to do with what it had started out as. Finally, fed-up with his attitude, the blond screeched, "You know what, I've had enough of this shit. It's over Riku; if this is the real you, then I'm gone." Flipping her hair, she picked up her keys and raced out of there.
His eyes snapping with blue fire, the young man stormed out of the house as she was tearing out of the driveway. Slamming open the door of his black Ford F-250, Riku jammed the keys in the ignition. Turning the engine over, he stared out the windshield as his rage started to simmer down. Leaning his forehead against the window for a moment, he took a deep breath, letting the cool glass chill his firey temper.
Reaching into the glove box for a good CD, his fingers brushed against something velvety soft. Pulling it out, he realized why his temper had been so bad that day. Placing the small box back into the compartment, he quickly placed the Travis Tritt disk in the CD player as he pulled out of the driveway.
Cruising down the road, he kept his eyes straight ahead, searching for tail-lights. Except for the stars, the only illumination came from the headlights of the sleek truck. Usually, he liked traveling this road; thick, tall redwoods surrounded it, and it almost seemed as if you were traveling back in time. But tonight, they seemed to be standing sentry, hinting at dire things soon to come.
Finally, after nearly twenty minutes of peering through the trees, he saw the crimson lights of another car just as he got to the outskirts of town. Pulling closer, he had just enough time to confirm that it was Namine's midnight blue Sable before another car came barreling around the corner, weaving drunkenly across the road.
Reacting instinctively, Riku slammed his foot on the brakes; but even the squealing of the truck's tires on the asphalt couldn't block out the horrible screeching of crumpled metal as the Sable and the other car collided.
Rubbing his head where he had hit it against the steering wheel, the young man faintly registered the blood on his fingers as he wrenched the door open. Hitting the pavement running, he bolted for the accident scene as a man pulled himself out of the other car, moaning about a headache. Reaching the wrecks, he wrestled the smashed driver's door open as a flame haired young lady called out, "What's going on? Does someone need help?"
Glancing quickly around, his silver hair in his eyes, Riku bellowed at the girl, "Kairi! Call 911! Now!" Turning back to the car, he reached in and flicked the seatbelt off Namine's lap. Slipping a hand behind her back and under her legs, he gently pulled her out of the ruined vehicle.
Racing away from the Sable, he brought the limp blond over near his truck and Kairi's car. Placing her down, he didn't even pay attention to the song that was on as he quickly took his coat off and placed it gently on the slim form of the girl. Looking her up and down, he registered the broken arm and the rapidly appearing bruises. Running his fingers through her hair, he pulled his hand away from the golden locks with blood on his fingers.
"Riku, what's going on? What happened... oh my...!" Turning around at the exlamation, he saw Kairi's face turning white. Since she had pulled him away from Namine's condition for a moment, he finally heard the words drifting out from the truck's radio; and the soft, melancholy ballad wasn't helping the fear that had started swelling in his chest.
Tell me I was dreaming,
That you didn't leave me here to cry.
You didn't say you don't love me anymore;
It was just my imagination telling lies.
Tell me that you didn't say Goodbye.
Darling tell me you didn't say,
Goodbye.
Pulling back some of her hair, he said in a soft, strained whisper, "Hang on Namine; please hang on. We're going to get you some help, I promise. Hold on, Pretty Thing."
Opening her eyes, she turned her face up to look at Riku. What he saw broke his heart beyond repair. Her eyes, usually a clear and laughing sapphire, pools so beautiful they put the brightness of the very stars to shame, were looking up at him with a dull, listless quality. Each hard won breath brought a painful tone to her eyes; yet they still seemed to smile at him. Parting her lips, she said in a soft, sad whisper, "I'm sorry, Riku. I... I shouldn't.... have done that."
Closing her eyes, she leaned her head back as tears leaked from beneath her eyelids. Gently brushing them away, Riku said in a low tone as the ambulance arrived, "No, Pretty Thing. I was the one that screwed up, not you." Numb, he let the paramedics pull him to the side while they started in on Namine.
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~-~- Hospital, few hours later -~-~
It was well past midnight, and he was starting to get even more anxious. Running his hand through his already ruffled hair, Riku didn't even take notice of the bandage on his right temple. Giving him a worried glance, Kairi asked weakly, "Riku, don't you think, maybe you should...?"
"No," he cut across her. Swallowing, he tried in a more gentle tone, "No, Kairi, I'm not going home. I want to know how she is first."
Finally, a half hour later, an exhausted doctor came to see them. Seeing the looks on their faces, she started in a gentle tone, "Miss Honeystar, Mr. Terra, I'm sorry to say that things don't look that well for your friend Miss Tsumi. Apart from the multiple cuts and bruises, the radius in her right arm is fractured in two separate locations; she has two cracked ribs and has also suffered a concussion. But I'm afraid that the worst of it is that there is severe internal bleeding and," swallowing, she continued hurriedly, "Miss Honeystar, Mr. Terra, I'm afraid that she's slipped into a coma; I don't know if she'll be able to come out of it."
-----------------------------------------
Shaking his head, Riku pushed the memory from his thoughts as he continued his trek up the icy slope. He'd sat by her side for weeks after, refusing to believe what the doctors told Sora, Roxas, Kairi and himself; not wanting to let the crushing weight of guilt kill him. There had been small improvements; the concussion and bleeding had cleared up; but Namine still hadn't come back from the coma. Unable to take it anymore he'd whispered an apology to her that evening before he had left.
Reaching level ground, he looked around himself. Having picked the area, he had come back to the site of the accident. Looking up at the moon, he couldn't help but find himself singing the song that had been stuck in his head for weeks.
I'm in a state of confusion,
I hope things aren't what they seem;
If this is really happiness,
Just let me go back to dream you're home.
Tell me I was dreaming,
That you didn't leave me here to cry.
You didn't say you don't love me anymore;
It was just my imagination telling lies.
Tell me that you didn't say Goodbye.
Darling tell, you didn't say,
Goodbye.
"Goodbye, Pretty Thing," Riku whispered. Holding the saber close to his side, he continued, "It's too much to bear anymore. I just can't do it, baby. The dream's turned into a nightmare that I just can't get out of. I'm sorry, Namine. I love you."
"Goodbye."
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Dream: Oh man, what've I done? This is the first chapter of a three part story. Wanna know how it ends? Tune in tommorow and you'll find out!
~-~- Tell Me I was Dreaming -~-~
It was the night before Christmas. Snow was falling in a thick white blanket, so that the little town soon looked like a gingerbread village with icing layered on it. Light shone through many windows, causing intricate patterns to fall on the powdery snow; inside, many families where gathered around glowing trees, singing carols or just enjoying the tranquility of the season. It was Christmas Eve, the most serene day of the year.
But on the outskirts of the little hamlet, the wind whipped the snow into flurries that stung on bare skin. The lights from the windows failed to penetrate the darkness here; the only light came from the full moon. She gazed down with sad eyes as she saw the young man struggling away from the light and warmth of the village, pressing on towards the cold, harsh countryside instead. She knew what was to come; she had seen this too often as she stood sentry over the earth. It caused her deep suffering to see this tortured soul shunning the help and compassion of his fellows. She knew that no balm could cure his savaged heart, but she still wished that she could gather him close and console him. She watched as he pushed on, past the point of caring anymore. She feared this path that he was on, for she knew that it lead only to self-destruction.
His silvery, shoulder length hair whipped out behind him as a small whirlwind hurled frozen shards of snow into his face; but he just ignored the icy sting as he continued up the slope. He was past feeling physical pain anymore; his senses had become numb to anything other then the wrenching pain of loss that filled him so completely. Dull ocean blue eyes watched the snow covered ground as he trudged on. There was once a time when those same slanting pools of sapphire had been full of a bright, laughing light, a time when he never would have entertained these dark thoughts that were racing through his mind now. But he felt that, without her, there was nothing left for him. It had been building for weeks, threatening to break it's bonds like a swollen river strains a dam. But the final straw was having to spend Christmas alone, without friends, without family. Without her. His tortured mind couldn't take it anymore; it was too much pain to go through, trying to live when the uncertainty of a lonely or non-existent future pressed closer for them both.
Without meaning to, his thoughts traveled back, back in time. Back to a beautiful autumn night, with the fallen leaves dancing in the moon's light, when she was shining down on the young lovers, a gay light in her merry eyes. The sun's rays might not penetrate the clouds as effectively, and the first signs of winter would nip at their skin, but the couple didn't care. All that mattered was their time together.
Watching the waters of the stream twist and churn down the small waterfall, she suddenly asked, "Riku, have you ever thought about the future? I mean, life's just as changing as this stream; it twists and flows all the way, but you can never go back the way you came. Each day is another day in your life, and you grow older; no matter how much you wish you could, you can never go back to yesterday. So really, all there is is the future. What do you think of tomorrow?"
Smiling, he met the blond's shining, pale blue eyes as he said, "What brought this on, Namine? Why are you so full of questions about tomorrow when today's not even over?" He had trouble hiding a chuckle, because he knew that she was just like this. Questions seemed to pop out of her at odd moments; but those spontaneous queries seemed to almost always have a deeper meaning to them.
Shrugging, the trim girl replied lightly, "I don't know, really. I just got this feeling all of a sudden that life is just so short; we could be gone tomorrow, things happen that fast." Glancing at the stream again, Namine said softly, "I just have this feeling that something bad is going to happen, and I won't be here for Christmas. Weird, isn't it?"
Sensing how upset she was, Riku pushed himself off the fallen log he was sitting on and moved closer. Wrapping his arms gently around her shoulders, he said in a soft, low whisper, "Nothing lasts forever, we both know that. But don't worry, I'm sure you'll still be here. I'll protect you, pretty thing, I promise."
----------------------------------------
Shaking his head, Riku found himself laughing as he said sourly, "'I'll protect you.' I promised that, didn't I? But how could I protect you from the accident when I wasn't even there in time? I couldn't stop that ass from drinking; or from getting behind the wheel when he knew he was too plastered to see straight. I should have been there, Pretty Thing; I should have been with you or stopped you from going out that night. I shouldn't have gotten mad, Namine; it was my fault." Slowly, despairingly, he struggled on, even as, once again, his thoughts went back. But they didn't travel as far back as before; but this time, he revisited a memory from the beginning of the month.
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Things had just been going bad for Riku the first of December, so that by the time he was supposed to pick Namine up for their date, he was about ready to kill. He'd already given Sora a fat lip and a black-eye to match it; and they were supposed to be best friends. His temper was short enough that he pretty much barked at her for being late when he went to get her.
Getting her own dander up, she retorted, "What do'you mean, I was late? You where suppose to be here half an hour ago. So what're you yelling at me for?"
One thing led to another, so that they were soon in a huge fight that had nothing to do with what it had started out as. Finally, fed-up with his attitude, the blond screeched, "You know what, I've had enough of this shit. It's over Riku; if this is the real you, then I'm gone." Flipping her hair, she picked up her keys and raced out of there.
His eyes snapping with blue fire, the young man stormed out of the house as she was tearing out of the driveway. Slamming open the door of his black Ford F-250, Riku jammed the keys in the ignition. Turning the engine over, he stared out the windshield as his rage started to simmer down. Leaning his forehead against the window for a moment, he took a deep breath, letting the cool glass chill his firey temper.
Reaching into the glove box for a good CD, his fingers brushed against something velvety soft. Pulling it out, he realized why his temper had been so bad that day. Placing the small box back into the compartment, he quickly placed the Travis Tritt disk in the CD player as he pulled out of the driveway.
Cruising down the road, he kept his eyes straight ahead, searching for tail-lights. Except for the stars, the only illumination came from the headlights of the sleek truck. Usually, he liked traveling this road; thick, tall redwoods surrounded it, and it almost seemed as if you were traveling back in time. But tonight, they seemed to be standing sentry, hinting at dire things soon to come.
Finally, after nearly twenty minutes of peering through the trees, he saw the crimson lights of another car just as he got to the outskirts of town. Pulling closer, he had just enough time to confirm that it was Namine's midnight blue Sable before another car came barreling around the corner, weaving drunkenly across the road.
Reacting instinctively, Riku slammed his foot on the brakes; but even the squealing of the truck's tires on the asphalt couldn't block out the horrible screeching of crumpled metal as the Sable and the other car collided.
Rubbing his head where he had hit it against the steering wheel, the young man faintly registered the blood on his fingers as he wrenched the door open. Hitting the pavement running, he bolted for the accident scene as a man pulled himself out of the other car, moaning about a headache. Reaching the wrecks, he wrestled the smashed driver's door open as a flame haired young lady called out, "What's going on? Does someone need help?"
Glancing quickly around, his silver hair in his eyes, Riku bellowed at the girl, "Kairi! Call 911! Now!" Turning back to the car, he reached in and flicked the seatbelt off Namine's lap. Slipping a hand behind her back and under her legs, he gently pulled her out of the ruined vehicle.
Racing away from the Sable, he brought the limp blond over near his truck and Kairi's car. Placing her down, he didn't even pay attention to the song that was on as he quickly took his coat off and placed it gently on the slim form of the girl. Looking her up and down, he registered the broken arm and the rapidly appearing bruises. Running his fingers through her hair, he pulled his hand away from the golden locks with blood on his fingers.
"Riku, what's going on? What happened... oh my...!" Turning around at the exlamation, he saw Kairi's face turning white. Since she had pulled him away from Namine's condition for a moment, he finally heard the words drifting out from the truck's radio; and the soft, melancholy ballad wasn't helping the fear that had started swelling in his chest.
Tell me I was dreaming,
That you didn't leave me here to cry.
You didn't say you don't love me anymore;
It was just my imagination telling lies.
Tell me that you didn't say Goodbye.
Darling tell me you didn't say,
Goodbye.
Pulling back some of her hair, he said in a soft, strained whisper, "Hang on Namine; please hang on. We're going to get you some help, I promise. Hold on, Pretty Thing."
Opening her eyes, she turned her face up to look at Riku. What he saw broke his heart beyond repair. Her eyes, usually a clear and laughing sapphire, pools so beautiful they put the brightness of the very stars to shame, were looking up at him with a dull, listless quality. Each hard won breath brought a painful tone to her eyes; yet they still seemed to smile at him. Parting her lips, she said in a soft, sad whisper, "I'm sorry, Riku. I... I shouldn't.... have done that."
Closing her eyes, she leaned her head back as tears leaked from beneath her eyelids. Gently brushing them away, Riku said in a low tone as the ambulance arrived, "No, Pretty Thing. I was the one that screwed up, not you." Numb, he let the paramedics pull him to the side while they started in on Namine.
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~-~- Hospital, few hours later -~-~
It was well past midnight, and he was starting to get even more anxious. Running his hand through his already ruffled hair, Riku didn't even take notice of the bandage on his right temple. Giving him a worried glance, Kairi asked weakly, "Riku, don't you think, maybe you should...?"
"No," he cut across her. Swallowing, he tried in a more gentle tone, "No, Kairi, I'm not going home. I want to know how she is first."
Finally, a half hour later, an exhausted doctor came to see them. Seeing the looks on their faces, she started in a gentle tone, "Miss Honeystar, Mr. Terra, I'm sorry to say that things don't look that well for your friend Miss Tsumi. Apart from the multiple cuts and bruises, the radius in her right arm is fractured in two separate locations; she has two cracked ribs and has also suffered a concussion. But I'm afraid that the worst of it is that there is severe internal bleeding and," swallowing, she continued hurriedly, "Miss Honeystar, Mr. Terra, I'm afraid that she's slipped into a coma; I don't know if she'll be able to come out of it."
-----------------------------------------
Shaking his head, Riku pushed the memory from his thoughts as he continued his trek up the icy slope. He'd sat by her side for weeks after, refusing to believe what the doctors told Sora, Roxas, Kairi and himself; not wanting to let the crushing weight of guilt kill him. There had been small improvements; the concussion and bleeding had cleared up; but Namine still hadn't come back from the coma. Unable to take it anymore he'd whispered an apology to her that evening before he had left.
Reaching level ground, he looked around himself. Having picked the area, he had come back to the site of the accident. Looking up at the moon, he couldn't help but find himself singing the song that had been stuck in his head for weeks.
I'm in a state of confusion,
I hope things aren't what they seem;
If this is really happiness,
Just let me go back to dream you're home.
Tell me I was dreaming,
That you didn't leave me here to cry.
You didn't say you don't love me anymore;
It was just my imagination telling lies.
Tell me that you didn't say Goodbye.
Darling tell, you didn't say,
Goodbye.
"Goodbye, Pretty Thing," Riku whispered. Holding the saber close to his side, he continued, "It's too much to bear anymore. I just can't do it, baby. The dream's turned into a nightmare that I just can't get out of. I'm sorry, Namine. I love you."
"Goodbye."
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Dream: Oh man, what've I done? This is the first chapter of a three part story. Wanna know how it ends? Tune in tommorow and you'll find out!