I really don't need help or support. I just need to rant.
Okay, my friends LOVE to piss me off. They think because I believe that love is just something that only appears in movies and books, that they feel I'm the perfect candidate to play the matchmaking game. My friend wanted me to go out with this guy for some random reason (the weird thing is though, that 2 of my other friends all asked him if he'd go out with me and those 2 friends and my other best friend have nothing to do with eachother and they still picked this guy, (and no, I barly talk to him so I don't understand how 3 different people all looked at the same guy when they wanted to see who I should go out with). He obviously said no all three times because I was in the background going "WTF are you people doing to me, I don't even KNOW him! RAWR!"
Anyway, that's not what makes me want to :23: the nearest person I see.
I actually started liking him after awhile. (I still blame it on the damn hair flip he does -.-) I started liking him despite my resolve to never involve myself with love, since it never ends well. Anyway, I confided in my friend (other best friend, not involved with the matchmaking) That I might like him but I'm trying not to. Well, her dumb ass goes off and tells my other friend who started the matchmaking. She promises not to tell, and actually keeps her word (shocker).
That's not what pisses me off either.
It's the fact that the friend I first confided into, decides all of a sudden, she likes him too. Well, my matchmaking friend, goes and asks him if he'd go out with her. He said he would consider it. And now, after school my friend that likes him will go and talk to him after school because they don't have classes together (don't ask how my friend likes him if they don't have classes together) He gave her a hug after school and then she immediately called me, telling me all about it. And I just nodded and said I was happy for her. And I am, I actually always wished she would find someone, and of coarse, I wished to forget about that guy, me being stubborn and all. So, this should be exactly what I wanted. She asked if I was mad at her. I said no, and meant it. But if she'd asked me if I felt sad, I would've said yes, or I might've bold faced lied but either way, I heard about this for about an hour.
The next day my friend asked me to come with her to talk with him, and I agreed. He hugged her again, and I just stood there smiling. I thought then, how hard would it be, if he said yes, and this happened every day.
Honestly, it's my fault anyway, maybe I should've been more straightforward. Maybe if I spent less time worrying about getting hurt and more time telling him how I felt, maybe this wouldn't happen. I feel like I should be mad at my friend, but I'm not, I want her to be happy, and I want to be happy for her, but sometimes, I wish I could be happy for myself for once.
I should've listened to my stubborn resolve. If I did, this whole thing would be perfect, but here I am, throwing a wrench in the works once again.
Okay, my friends LOVE to piss me off. They think because I believe that love is just something that only appears in movies and books, that they feel I'm the perfect candidate to play the matchmaking game. My friend wanted me to go out with this guy for some random reason (the weird thing is though, that 2 of my other friends all asked him if he'd go out with me and those 2 friends and my other best friend have nothing to do with eachother and they still picked this guy, (and no, I barly talk to him so I don't understand how 3 different people all looked at the same guy when they wanted to see who I should go out with). He obviously said no all three times because I was in the background going "WTF are you people doing to me, I don't even KNOW him! RAWR!"
Anyway, that's not what makes me want to :23: the nearest person I see.
I actually started liking him after awhile. (I still blame it on the damn hair flip he does -.-) I started liking him despite my resolve to never involve myself with love, since it never ends well. Anyway, I confided in my friend (other best friend, not involved with the matchmaking) That I might like him but I'm trying not to. Well, her dumb ass goes off and tells my other friend who started the matchmaking. She promises not to tell, and actually keeps her word (shocker).
That's not what pisses me off either.
It's the fact that the friend I first confided into, decides all of a sudden, she likes him too. Well, my matchmaking friend, goes and asks him if he'd go out with her. He said he would consider it. And now, after school my friend that likes him will go and talk to him after school because they don't have classes together (don't ask how my friend likes him if they don't have classes together) He gave her a hug after school and then she immediately called me, telling me all about it. And I just nodded and said I was happy for her. And I am, I actually always wished she would find someone, and of coarse, I wished to forget about that guy, me being stubborn and all. So, this should be exactly what I wanted. She asked if I was mad at her. I said no, and meant it. But if she'd asked me if I felt sad, I would've said yes, or I might've bold faced lied but either way, I heard about this for about an hour.
The next day my friend asked me to come with her to talk with him, and I agreed. He hugged her again, and I just stood there smiling. I thought then, how hard would it be, if he said yes, and this happened every day.
Honestly, it's my fault anyway, maybe I should've been more straightforward. Maybe if I spent less time worrying about getting hurt and more time telling him how I felt, maybe this wouldn't happen. I feel like I should be mad at my friend, but I'm not, I want her to be happy, and I want to be happy for her, but sometimes, I wish I could be happy for myself for once.
I should've listened to my stubborn resolve. If I did, this whole thing would be perfect, but here I am, throwing a wrench in the works once again.
