I hope you do write it! Sorry to hear about your current status!
Though, one thing about fics, you write it in your own style, and may sometimes take advice from readers of your fan fic. It would be interesting to see your diverse side, though, this is just an independant opinion..xD
Can't really help you with the meaning of life.. Or so I think... Since there is no meaning to life.. Only to those whom believe in a meaning of themselves, which brings purposes, and what that person thinks... Though, sadly, emotions are supposed to be a big part of your life, as some of the old saying goes,"Follow your heart!"... Which is... Idiotic..>.>
Sorry if I'm not helping much... I feel bleh today... Damn... I may be becoming more mature... Or normal....
Well, I know how you feel about looking back at what people write...=^_^= I remember I looked back at a chapter I wrote for a fanfic I hope to publish, and I was thinking what the hell, since I over did it very much.... Though, I'm planning to edit it....
Usually editing a chapter is the best way to make it go the way you want it to, then, there's one of those times when you have to go through a chapter, which you will forever despise, no matter what....
Damn.. I'm mumbling now!>.< Anyway, either way, I shall wait for an update, no matter how long it takes!=^_^=... Just as long I won't have to double post...xD Or anything like that, for it would look unproffesional...
.... Okay, I really need to shut up... NOW... I'm not making much logical sense....>.>