Help/Support ► i'm disgusted at myself...

[Weeaboo]

the reason why i did it was because i have a phobia to commitment and this other person took the tension away. I thought if i had a loose relationship, then it would be easier to commit and be able to actually call my friend boyfriend.

This probably make sense to anyone but me. which i do feel the grave error i have done. and yes i want to beg for forgiveness.

Then you have commitment issues.

Nuff said.

 

[Nutari]

I don't get it ...your afraid to do something you've never done? ?..

Not sure if a 'loose' relationship should mean spending the night with any guy you find cute. That friend of yours liked you ...maybe if you explained your 'phobia' he could've understood, but now ...might seem an excuse.

I agree on this one. It really does seem like a reasoning for yourself, sorta like justifying what you did cuz you were scared. JUST talk to him. Stop talking to us about it, were not your friend that you hurt

 

[Steamboatwillis]

nbd??? i want to say sorry. i really do. But the first time i tried calling him his voice mail came in when it rang twice. Ever since i'm afraid he might throw a tantrum and yell at me, and i know i do deserve someone screaming at my face or so...

Yeah but isn't that life? Everything happens for a reason doesn't it? Well that's what i think... If you call him nothing worse can happen, and if nothing comes out of it at least you tried. Try to talk to him, don't be scared.

 

[Allister Rose]

I agree on this one. It really does seem like a reasoning for yourself, sorta like justifying what you did cuz you were scared. JUST talk to him. Stop talking to us about it, were not your friend that you hurt

look, in my mind it was different at that time, i know i messed up and trying to remember it.

but i will try again....

 

[Allister Rose]

sorry for double post. but i called him twice, and he answered the second time. i was begging over and over and in the end he said "it's Ok" and we'll talk more about it later. He sound some-what reassuring...but i still hate myself....i guess it's natural though....I'll give you guys an update on the situation in case it might not be so good news.

 

[Memory Master]

sorry for double post. but i called him twice, and he answered the second time. i was begging over and over and in the end he said "it's Ok" and we'll talk more about it later. He sound some-what reassuring...but i still hate myself....i guess it's natural though....I'll give you guys an update on the situation in case it might not be so good news.

Allister, listen, I can tell you feel really guilty and you feel like you should beg and be shouted at, and that's okay. It's good you feel that way, because it shows you feel guilt for what you did and that shows you are really sorry. Now just express this guilt and beg to him, if he sees this and if he really cares for you then he'll see how sorry you are and he'll forgive you. After that, talk with him and work things out from there.

Keep me updated Allister, i'm here to support you.

 

[Allister Rose]

Wow thanks. I really felt that. He;s going to talk to me tomorrow. So i'll probably be able to update you on it by then.

 

[gelandporn]

Now just express this guilt and beg to him, if he sees this and if he really cares for you then he'll see how sorry you are and he'll forgive you

But if this guy really loves you, he'll forgive you. Yeah his heart is broken, but he'll forgive you.

Forgiving someone for being disloyal doesn't necessarily mean getting back together. Nor should it be in many cases.
Forgiveness is also about moving on.

And coming from personal experience, I hate begging. It disgusts me. You can plead your case, sure, but to see someone so weak willed, it's just.... yeah.
I'm not even saying it won't work, just that it's a pathetic way to try.
You should feel sorry and he should know that. But he shouldn't force you to beg and you shouldn't force yourself to beg. I see it as a sign of infatuation and desperation, but not love.

 

[Allister Rose]

i see....well I've been thinking about whether i actually love him or not. I do have some strong affection for him for being so patient with me. i do want to be with him again. and well i guess begging is disgusting aswell too...hm....i guess i did develop some desperation though. did happened like a week ago so you can see how late i am in this

 

[SamuelVimes]

Man, you sure screwed up, miss Allister.
My advice? Beg for forgiveness, because you sure as hell need to. Yes, it's good that you feel bad, but he feels much much worse.

So yeah, if you really love him, apologize like you really fucking mean it.

 

[Eyesore]

Imo, you shouldn't feel sorry...
You found some fun, and had it.
It's the dude's fault for acting as if no one in the entire world ever hooks up with people just to hook up, and proceeding to get hurt.
But, you guys are 'trying' to 'commit,' so I guess he has a reason to...
Though, if you guys aren't legitimately dating, I don't think there should be any heartbreak from him and "My god I am the devil" thoughts from you.
-shrugs-

 

[Allister Rose]

Imo, you shouldn't feel sorry...
You found some fun, and had it.
It's the dude's fault for acting as if no one in the entire world ever hooks up with people just to hook up, and proceeding to get hurt.
But, you guys are 'trying' to 'commit,' so I guess he has a reason to...
Though, if you guys aren't legitimately dating, I don't think there should be any heartbreak from him and "My god I am the devil" thoughts from you.
-shrugs-

the point is i broke his heart and shouldve talked about it with him before i did anything. We were dating we just werent calling each other boyfriend-girlfriend (if that makes any sense). i didn't want to say this, but i literally got "caught". it was the worst case scenario.

 

[SamuelVimes]

Imo, you shouldn't feel sorry...
You found some fun, and had it.
It's the dude's fault for acting as if no one in the entire world ever hooks up with people just to hook up, and proceeding to get hurt.
But, you guys are 'trying' to 'commit,' so I guess he has a reason to...
Though, if you guys aren't legitimately dating, I don't think there should be any heartbreak from him and "My god I am the devil" thoughts from you.
-shrugs-

You know, two people may love each other and not date.
Also, she still cheated on the person who loved her and who she loved back. That's a pretty bad thing. And what's with the "you found some fun" part? Man, you must live in a strange world.

 

[Allister Rose]

well...i'm not so sure i love him in the same way he loves me. but i do care for him enough to feel bad whenever something like this might happen....

 

[SamuelVimes]

well...i'm not so sure i love him in the same way he loves me. but i do care for him enough to feel bad whenever something like this might happen....

Then simply apologize, but actually mean it.
If he is not a douche, he'd at least forgive you.

 

[Allister Rose]

I did. i called him today a few hours ago. he said he'll talk to me tomorrow. S oi'm just waiting so i can fix this. I really don't blame him if he doesn't forgive me though.

 

[Eyesore]

You know, two people may love each other and not date.
Also, she still cheated on the person who loved her and who she loved back. That's a pretty bad thing. And what's with the "you found some fun" part? Man, you must live in a strange world.

I know that...
But -- Why would you get mad at a person for hooking up with someone, when you're not dating? Should be, none of your concern, imo.
Although I said I kinda understand why they got emotional, since they're 'trying' to 'commit,' so yeah...
And I said she found some fun because, uh, she obviously did, ala the point of hooking with someone? lmao, wtf.

 

[Allister Rose]

we "were" dating. we just weren't calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend. ugh.......forget it....Alex, i know your not trying to, but you just make me feel like I'm more of a whore than i am now........

 

[Eyesore]

.Alex, i know your not trying to, but you just make me feel like I'm more of a whore than i am now........

Word.
My bad, beau.
Just my opinion.

 

[Marly]

the point is i broke his heart and shouldve talked about it with him before i did anything. We were dating we just werent calling each other boyfriend-girlfriend (if that makes any sense). i didn't want to say this, but i literally got "caught". it was the worst case scenario.

What? Should've talked to him about it before you did anything? "Hey Imma go have some sex with this dude", "Ok hun, cya later tonight." If talking to him about it before you did it would've prevented this then you guys have some weird-ass relationship going on.