Help/Support ► Tied to the Dead, help me.

[Tsuki-chan]

Last night I woke up in the middle of the night, in a sweat, breathing hard. I got up and looked at a picture, not just any old picture a picture that means life, happiness, sadness, excitement, and much more.

Meeting him in mellow day staring at the sun and sitting alone, he walked up to me and said "Hi" and I looked and said "Hi" back. He sat down and said "Hi, I'm Kendall!"I looked at him strangely" and said "Hi, I'm Shade..." For 30 minutes we talked about everything , then the bell rang it was time for class. We were in the same class together, I stared at him once more, and thought to myself " A friend..."
We became best of friends and made more friends on the way. He was Kendall-san to me and I was Shade-chan to him. He talked to me when I was sad, he stopped me from doing stupid stuff, and he informed me on everything. He helped me make friends and we became of group of friends, I felt loved so I'd smile. If he had any troubles he'd come to me, and I'd help, and that's something that not even his girlfriend could do.

He told me one day that "I'm moving". Before he moved though I gave him a fan I made and it had a picture of me on it, and he gave me a picture of him on cardboard project he made for me. He told me "Date everything, it might means something one day."
He left, I cried a lot and kept hold of his picture a lot and looked at the dating and thought "Silly Kendall-san..." I never let anyone touch any of the pictures he give me, or I'll growl at you or snatch from you and give you a dirty look.

Then, one day...
it's been almost 3 years since his girlfriend told me Kendall-san had died, she wouldnt tell me how, she told me it'd hurt me to much. No wonder he stopped E-mailing me. I was lost, I didnt know what was what anymore the world was just not there. My mom told me to "Suck it up and move on." Plus he moved to New Orleans(where the hurricane was) so we didnt think he'd be alive still.

I've tried doing that and I cant, I loved Kendall-san. I never told him that but I love him with all my heart and I cant just forget him. I still cry about him. With Kendall-san there I wasnt alone ,he was my first true friend.

So I need help.

What can I do so that I'm not always sad when I think about him?
Should I try to forget him and continue with life?
Is there anyway I can get info on him?
Is there anyway that I could maybe see if his parents are still alive?
Is it okay that I'm overprotected with the stuff I have from Kendall-san?
Is it okay that I still cry about Kendall-san being dead?
Is it alright to be afraid of forgetting him?
Is it alright to still feel tied to him even though he's dead?

 

[Joy]

What can I do so that I'm not always sad when I think about him?

Remember the happy things you and him did. Laugh at the things you did instead of cry.

Should I try to forget him and continue with life?

If you suppress this, it'll come back again and bite you in the ass when you least suspect it. Don't forget about him, but you do have to start going on with your life. Would he want you to be sad?

Is it okay that I'm overprotected with the stuff I have from Kendall-san?

Yeah, i do all the time with other people's things.

Is it okay that I still cry about Kendall-san being dead?

It's fine. But again, you can't keep being attached to him. Everyone you care about, including him, robably doesn't want you going through that.

Is it alright to be afraid of forgetting him?

Definatley.

Is it alright to still feel tied to him even though he's dead?

Yea, you two were best friends.


Though, people on an online forum won't be as much help as a psychologist. They'll help more than any of us.

 

[Katattack]

What can I do so that I'm not always sad when I think about him?

Well, you're going to be sad about it, always. There's nothing that'll really be a substitute for him. But you have to remember that he wanted you to enjoy yourself. You need to remember the most important things he taught you.

Should I try to forget him and continue with life?

Never forget him. You need to remember him, or his life means that much less.

Is there anyway I can get info on him?

You need to ask his girlfriend. Somehow, she needs to realize that she's not the only one who lost someone. And she was even blessed with knowing how it happened.

Is there anyway that I could maybe see if his parents are still alive?

Once again, ask his girlfriend.

Is it okay that I'm overprotected with the stuff I have from Kendall-san?

Yes. It's going to be in short supply, sadly enough. But make sure you explain why you're protective to others who you care for.

Is it okay that I still cry about Kendall-san being dead?

Yes. It's perfectly fine. Anyone who tells you that you can't cry over the death of a friend is wrong. Don't let anyone tell you it's shameful to care.

Is it alright to be afraid of forgetting him?

Yes, it's alright. Remembering lost friends and family are very important to people.

Is it alright to still feel tied to him even though he's dead?

You'll always be tied to him. You two obviously were very close, and you won't cut off those ties easily.

I'm sorry people are telling you to "Get over it" and such. It's very insensitive. If you're so upset over his death, he was obviously a very good person to you, and they should respect that.

 

[Shadukai X]

What can I do so that I'm not always sad when I think about him?

Think about the good times, like Time said.

Should I try to forget him and continue with life?

Don't forget about him, but continue with life. Learn from your friendship, and lead an example. Love how he loved

Is there anyway I can get info on him?

Talk to his GF, see if could get info on him from her.

Is there anyway that I could maybe see if his parents are still alive?

If you're parents were willing to to take you, yes.

Is it okay that I'm overprotected with the stuff I have from Kendall-san?

Why shouldn't you be? They're special things, gifts for you.

Is it okay that I still cry about Kendall-san being dead?

Its not enjoyable, and you shouldn't.

Is it alright to be afraid of forgetting him?

Yes it is alright, its natural

Is it alright to still feel tied to him even though he's dead?

Love is beyond earthly bounds, so yes you can be, and probably are.

I hope you feel better
~Shad

 

[╬ProperArtist╬]

What can I do so that I'm not always sad when I think about him?
Should I try to forget him and continue with life?
Is there anyway I can get info on him?
Is there anyway that I could maybe see if his parents are still alive?
Is it okay that I'm overprotected with the stuff I have from Kendall-san?
Is it okay that I still cry about Kendall-san being dead?
Is it alright to be afraid of forgetting him?
Is it alright to still feel tied to him even though he's dead?

To sum it all up I guess it's right for you to feel the way you do, because you lost what was most precious to you. You lost your best friend, the first real friend you ever had, you lost a love..someone who loved you.....someone who understood you beyond all possible comprehension...

It's okay to feel the way you do because your begining to feel alone again like everything around you is just falling in around you. Your heart is broken because of the pain of his death and you don't know how to deal with it so the darkness is begining to slip into your mind.

No you shouldn't just forget about him and get on with your life, because with as much influence as he's had on your life...it would just destroy you on the inside, and in a way it's like tearing a piece of your soul out...and I'm sure if you keep
asking questions & don't stop trying to find out what happened to him I'm sure you could get an answer....
It might be right to try and find your friends parents(what happened to them) but at the same time it could as a result make plunge you deeper into depression than you want to be..

Yes it's alright for you to be afraid to forget about him and Yes it's alright for you to feel so tied to him still...because he was your bestfriend/soul-mate (doesn't necessarily mean boyfriend & girlfriend)....your afraid to forget and admit he's gone because saying that and believing it in your heart trully would kill you on the inside....and you don't want that to happen, because still connecting with him and remember him even though he's dead is your will to keep on going....

Everything your going through and thinking is fine....because he was the glue that held you together literally & mentally

Eventually there will come the time when you will have to let go....but for now it's alright to greave....but when the time comes be prepared cause the road ahead will a hard experience to endure...

You may have lost a friend(a bestfriend) but through this you've gained an understanding...an apperication for true friendship, a true feel for what it is to have someone understand and make you feel that awesome emotionally...
all you can do is keep the faith and never let go of hope...it's all you have left...and don't worry as long as you hold on to Kendall-chan and even after he'll always be around you watching you protecting you from evil because he'll always be your friend in life & even through death...

till next time

~The Fallen Angel~

 

[.:EngetsuDrake:.]

Aw, I thot you where hunted or someting like it...thats more fun...


1What can I do so that I'm not always sad when I think about him?
2Should I try to forget him and continue with life?
3Is there anyway I can get info on him?
4Is there anyway that I could maybe see if his parents are still alive?
5Is it okay that I'm overprotected with the stuff I have from Kendall-san?
6Is it okay that I still cry about Kendall-san being dead?
7Is it alright to be afraid of forgetting him?
8Is it alright to still feel tied to him even though he's dead?

1Try to cry of happiness not saddness.
2no continue your life but don´t forget him either.
3dunno how it works in america.
4same
5Yep it´s ok, cuse youll get ower it.
6Always
7yes
8yup


Those are, fast answers but I have one good tip (it works for some, others don´t.

Tip: Take all but one or all of your bellonging of him and to example if he liked water or something else forest or something, so we say rivers. Make something nice like a small boat or something and let your blelongings of his go away on it. Look as it sials away and smile. Then turn araound and don´t look back.

I actually did it once, I felt so much better after it...
Hope you actually is able to do something and say if you use my tip and if it worked or not, it wud be nice to know

 

[RTP49]

...

I smell copy pasta... :\

But if you love him so much, feel free to stay 'tied' to him if you wish.

 

[Seirio]

What can I do so that I'm not always sad when I think about him?
Think about the happy times you had with him
Should I try to forget him and continue with life?
Its ok to remember him.Move on but you can still remember him and have the happiness that he granted you over the times he's people with you
Is there anyway I can get info on him?
Eh,I use the CIA
Is there anyway that I could maybe see if his parents are still alive?
Look above,and yes its true,I have connections with the CIA
Is it okay that I'm overprotected with the stuff I have from Kendall-san?
Its ok,imagine the fan he gave you as a reminder of him,a memoir if you will
Is it okay that I still cry about Kendall-san being dead?
Let all of your feelings out,just know that he is a good person
Is it alright to be afraid of forgetting him?
Its also alright to be afraid,everyone is afraid of forgetting someone important to them.You have the fan,which will remind you of him,and bring back memories
Is it alright to still feel tied to him even though he's dead?
Yes,its ok to be this way.People always feel this way when an event such as this happens.He and everyone important to you is always tied to you,im memory,spirit,and heart.You loved him,so he will stay with ya.

 

[Athletics Legend]

What can I do so that I'm not always sad when I think about him? Think of all the happy times together..
Should I try to forget him and continue with life?Yeah, but dont forget him competely, think of him everday but not too much
Is there anyway I can get info on him?Ask his gf
Is there anyway that I could maybe see if his parents are still alive? Yeah, police or government..
Is it okay that I'm overprotected with the stuff I have from Kendall-san? Yeah
Is it okay that I still cry about Kendall-san being dead?Yeah
Is it alright to be afraid of forgetting him?No
Is it alright to still feel tied to him even though he's dead?Yeah