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Demyxrox

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Feb 6, 2007
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AUST
I feel like my life is almost over. I just want to scream. Let me tell you how it started…

It happened on the first of January 2 months ago I was walking down the street just going for a walk because there was nothing better to do. It was a hot day so I was lucky I took my wallet with me. I went into Bob’s ice cream pallor I noticed there was a new employee so I said “hi you new?” he looked startled when I said this and practically jumped into the roof. He said “I wish people would stop doing that…” “Sorry I didn’t mean to startle you.” “Its cool anyway yea I’m new here I started work yesterday.” He turned around and smiled at me his eyes were as green as the grass in the summer I just stood there starring at him then he looked a bit worried “you ok?” this time I nearly jumped into the roof “yeah sorry.” “Kay so what do you want?” “Umm…” I had to think of what to get because the menu had changed from the previous year. “I’ll have…hmm” I couldn’t think of what to order so he said “you take a minute to think about it I’ll be right back.” “Ok” I said then he went into the back room. Five minutes later he came back and I said “I’ll just have a fruit shake thanks uhh…” “Demyx” “right” “what flavour? Apple and strawberry or pineapple and mango?” “Apple and strawberry thanks Demyx.” “So… do you come here often?” “Usually only on hot days but I sometimes come here on the weekends.” “so what’s your name?” oh sorry I’m Amy” “so Amy you wanna come with me and my friends tonight? We’re going to the beach and then coming back here for some ice cream afterwards my shout.” “Sure what time? And where do I meet you?” “Around 6:00pm and just meet me here.” “Ok I’ll see you then.” “Kay bye.” I can’t believe it. A guy just asked me out. Well I’m not sure if it counts if you’re going with his friends as well but oh well he just asked me out!

That night thankfully my parents let me go I met Demyx at Bob’s ice cream pallor and we went down to the beach where he introduced me to his friends “this is Marluxia” “hey” “Larxene” “hi” “Axel” “ I like fire” “and Zexion” “how’s it goin?” “Guys this is Amy.” “Hi” I’ll have to admit I was a bit nervous seeing as apart from Larxene I was the only girl there and what’d really funny is that the boys wanted to play truth or dare. Axel went first. “Ok Axel truth or dare?” said Zexion “hmmm truth.” “Have you ever set your pants on fire by accident?” “once.” Everyone burst out laughing even me. “Ok your turn Marluxia.” Said Axel “what’ll it be truth or dare?” “dare.” Everyone gasped except Axel he just laughed and said “I’ve been waiting for this my whole life. I dare you to …” everyone held their breath “kiss Zex” Zexion just screamed and ran for the toilets. Everyone laughed then Demyx went to get him. Then it was Larxene’s turn. She held her breath as Marluxia asked “truth or dare?” “truth.” She said “out of the whole of Organization XIII who do you like the most?” she whispered it to Marluxia and then he told Axel who told Zex who told Demyx who said it out loud. “Sa’ix?!” he screamed. Then it was his turn he said “truth.” Larxene asked “have you ever played the wrong cord on stage?” “A couple of times.” I held my breath. It was my turn. “Truth or dare” Marluxia asked me. I meant to say truth but I said “dare.” He thought about it then said “I dare you to…” Zex whispered something to Axel who whispered it to Marluxia. “I dare you to kiss Demyx right now.” I just sat there with my eyes wide open. I looked over at Demyx I saw that he didn’t mind infact he looked quite pleased. I couldn’t believe this. They were all waiting for us to kiss. And then. He leaned over and looked me in the eyes and then. Zex pushed me and Larxene pushed Demyx and we kissed while Axel was laughing so hard that he fell backwards.
After that we went to bob’s ice cream pallor and it was Demyx’s shout like he said since he didn’t have his go down on the beach it was Zexion’s turn. He chose dare and Axel said “I dare you to call Xemnas mansex and then say that it was and accident in the next meeting.” Zex’s jaw dropped and everyone looked at Axel as if he where crazy. Then Larxene said “if he does that Axel he might get fired!” “Not if I have anything to do with it.” Then someone walked in but I don’t know who it was. Then Demyx said “Sa’ix what are you doing here?” “I heard you five where going out for the night and I thought I might tag along.” “Where you here when we were down on the beach?” Larxene asked “no I was not.” She let out a huge sigh. Then Sa’ix looked at me. “And who might you be?” he asked. Before I could say anything Demyx said “this is Amy I met her today.” “I see… Demyx can I talk to you for a moment?” “Sure” when they walked into another room the others got up and started listening. I didn’t want to feel left out so I listened to. I heard them talking “Demyx you never know she could be the enemy!” Sa’ix said. “I know she’s not Sa’ix if she was don’t you think she’d have brought an army of heartless with her tonight?” “I suppose she would have but…” “But what Sa’ix?” “Never mind you can go back to your little “party” now Demyx” then everyone rushed back to their seat including me.

Demyx walked me home that night but he didn’t say anything. I felt like making conversation but there was nothing to talk about. Then he said “it’s very quiet.” “It’s a quiet street.” When we got to my house I looked at my shoes then back at him “bye” I said. He crabbed my wrist as I was walking away. I turned back and he said “wait. You wanna go to the movies tomorrow? My friends aren’t coming it’ll just be you and me.” I thought about it for a second then said “call me.” “I don’t have your phone number.” I took out a pen and a piece of paper from my purse and wrote down my number then gave it to him. He looked down at it then back at me a smiled. “You do now.” I said then I smiled back “bye.” “See ya.” Then I went inside. After that I called my best friend and told her everything about what happened. By the sounds of it the only thing she could say was oh my god! “Oh my god! That’s so awesome Amy!” “Maybe you’re forgetting something.” “What?” “He only kissed me because his friends pushed us.” “I think he was going to even if they didn’t.” “Yeah well anyway I have to go. My dad needs to use the phone.” “Kay bye.” “Bye.”

The next day I woke up feeling really weird. Time just seemed to stop. I looked out the window people passing by were frozen. I got dressed and ran down stairs. My parents were in the middle of having breakfast. Dad had the newspaper up to his face and my mum had her eyes closed I waved my hand in front of dad’s face. Nothing. Not even a twitch. I took my hand away then suddenly time unfroze. “I still can’t believe they made me pay that much just to get the engine replaced.” Dad said. My mother looked up from the table and screamed. I looked behind me and said “what?” “How did you get here so fast? You scared the life out of me.” “Sorry. But I don’t know how I got here so fast. It just happened.” That day on the way to school (I left earlier than usual.) I stopped at Bob’s ice cream pallor. Just to say hi to Demyx. When I got there we talked for five minutes then left for school. We still had plenty of time before the bell went for first class so I showed him around a bit. After all he is new here. First I showed him the library then the science block and then when we were walking towards the area were my friends were he sighed. “What’s up?” I asked. “nothing.” He said. He sounded a bit bored. “You sure about that?” “I’m fine don’t worry.” “Okay if you’re sure.” When we got to where my friends were time froze again. “Not again!” I said. Then Demyx looked at me and said “this has happened before?” I looked at him and said “how come you’re not frozen?” “Sa’ix was right…” “What are you talking about?” “Listen to me carefully. If we hang out anymore you’re toast!” “Demyx if you don’t want to be friends anymore I can understand that but you don’t have to make up things like that.” “Amy I’m not making this up! To organization XIII you’re the enemy. I was hoping you weren’t…” “Are you saying that the next time I see you and you’re friends you’re going to kill me?” he nodded. I could not believe this. It’s the lamest excuse I’ve heard. This guy doesn’t want to hang out with me so he makes up some excuse that if he does his friends will kill me. Yeah right. How dumb does he think I am? “Listen Demyx if you’re going to make up stupid stories like that then maybe we shouldn’t hang out.” “Amy you don’t understand. I’m not making this up! This is the truth. I just wish I could tell you… that gives me an idea…” “I don’t like were this is going…” he said “pretend to be frozen Sa’ix is coming.” “How can you tell?” “Just do it!” so I pretended to be frozen then that guy Sa’ix appeared.

I was amazed that he new that. Then they started to talk. “So Demyx did you find out who she is?” “She’s nobody Sa’ix just an ordinary teenage girl.” Uh oh I thought to myself. I need to… then I sneezed. And thought to myself, sneeze. “Someone isn’t frozen.” Sa’ix said. “Someone just sneezed,” Demyx was about to say something when Sai’x said “and don’t say it was you because I know it wasn’t.” then Axel came out of no where. “Sorry. That was me.” “Axel what on earth are you doing here? Didn’t Xemnas get you to clean out the garage?” “I used a quicker way.” “Don’t tell me you set the garage on fire again?” Demyx said. “Ok” Axel said “I won’t.” Demyx sighed and said “you better not have ruined the CD rack I made last year.” “I didn’t.” he made a relieved sigh then Axel said “Xaldin on the other hand…” Demyx looked a bit annoyed. “he tried to put the fire out with a gust of wind but…well your CD rack got caught up in it and well… lets just say it flew into the wall and shattered into a million pieces.” Demyx looked angry. REALLY angry.

“Let’s change the subject shall we?” “Oh Sa’ix,” Axel said “I didn’t see you there.” “Don’t play your stupid games with me Axel. We have some serious things to do.” “Like what?” Axel asked. “That girl,” he pointed at me “she’s the enemy with have to “dispose” of her quickly.” “Why?” Axel asked. “Because those were the boss’s orders. He said,” he started to do an imitation “whether she’s the enemy or not dispose of her” Demyx and Axel tried not to laugh at the imitation but they just burst out laughing then Sa’ix said “good to know that I still have my funny side.” Then Demyx said “umm Sa’ix that’s not what we were laughing at.” I looked over at Sa’ix and saw that Larxene was floating above him with a sign that said tinkle fairy. I tried not to laugh. But it was too late. I burst out laughing and Demyx said under his breath “oh no…” I said softly “oops…” “Oh,” Sa’ix said “it appears Amy is not quite frozen…” he lifted his arms up in the air and said “Marluxia. I call upon thy idiot.” Larxene was still above Sa’ix only she had a different sign saying “this guy still sleeps with a night light.” And then an arrow pointing down at Sa’ix. Demyx and Axel looked at each other then back at the sign and just laughed. “See I told you I was funny.” “I told you we’re not laughing at you!” “Then what are you laughing at?” “… Never mind.”



I was starting to back away slowly when I bumped into something. Or rather someone. “Hey Amy.” “Damn it.” I said under my breath. Marluxia was just smiling all the time then stopped and said “Did I miss something?” Demyx walked over the Marluxia put his hand on his shoulder shook his head and said “Oh Marluxia, Marluxia…what are we going to do with such a big idiot?” then he hit him back of the head and whispered to me “run for it while I distract them.” I nodded and he, with his arm around Marluxia’s neck turned his head to face me then winked. While everyone was watching them I hid behind a tree. I looked back at them then when I turned around someone held my mouth so I couldn’t scream. I looked up to find out it was the guy from in my class. Roxas I think his name was. He always hung out with Hayner, Pence and Olette so I don’t know him much. We ran over to the front office of the school. He was waving his hand in front of the people while I was searching through the cupboards for the watch the principle confiscated from me two weeks ago just because it kept going off in class. “What’s going on?” Roxas asked me “I don’t know but what I do know is that we have to get out of here. And fast.” I grabbed his wrist and ran out of the school.

I looked back and there were these strange white creatures following us. I thought I only said it in my mind but I said it out loud “those must be the nobodies Demyx told me about…because they’re certainly not heartless.” “What’s a nobody?” “No time to explain.” We got a bit further then we ran into Axel who just came out of no where. “Amy I saw you running away where’re you going? Huh.” He looked at Roxas and said “long time no see.” “Listen Axel we need to get out of here. You got to help us.” “Sure where to?” any where but here.” I said. “I know just the place. I’m going to send you guys to a place called Destiny Islands you’ll meet Zex there he’ll send you some where else.” Then he opened up a black portal thing. “Go through there it’ll lead you straight to Destiny Islands now go.” I nodded to him and said “Tell Demyx I’m sorry.” “Will do.” I smiled and grabbed Roxas’s wrist and we went through.

When we got out we were on a some kind of island then two boys and a girl came from around the corner and saw us one of the boy’s ran to help me up and the other helped Roxas up then the girl said. “I hope you guys are all right you came out of the sky.” “We’re fine thanks.” I smiled and said “I’m Amy by the way and this is Roxas.” “Hey” he said. The girl said “Well I’m Kairi this is Sora,” “hey” “, and Riku.” “Hey” “umm we’re looking for a guy who has silver hair.” Then Riku said “umm.” “His name is Zexion.” “Oh.” “Well since he’s not here I guess we’re just going to have to stay here for a while. Do you guys know where we could sleep for tonight?” then Kairi said “Hey I have an idea.” Then Sora said “We’re doomed.” Then he Riku and Roxas laughed. Kairi put her hands on her hips and they stopped and Sora said “sorry.” “anyway as I was saying how about we sleep here for the night we could like eat out on the beach and when its time to sleep we can sleep in the seaside shack or something. How about it guys?” she looked over at Riku and Sora. Then Sora said “I’m in.” then Riku looked at Sora then said “me too.” “So it’s settled then we spend the night on the island.”

So that night we ate and slept on the island. After we ate Roxas and I went for a walk. “I’m sorry you got mixed up in this.” I said to him “don’t worry about it.” “I can tell you’re not happy here. This is my mess. You have to go back to Twilight Town. You didn’t deserve to be brought along with me. I’m sorry.” Then he stopped. I was about a meter in front of him when I noticed. I looked back and saw that he was looking up so I asked “what are you looking at?” “Look up and you’ll find out.” So I looked up. The stars were in a constellation of what looked like Demyx.

To be continued(maybe) tell me wat u think( i know its a bit bad at the moment but i'm workin on it.)
 

Endgame

:D
Joined
Apr 21, 2005
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What I think about it?

I think, if you can't even be bothered to use English, as opposed to whatever bastardised dialect you used there, why the hell would anyone WANT to read it?
 

Demyxrox

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Feb 6, 2007
Messages
8
Location
AUST
What I think about it?

I think, if you can't even be bothered to use English, as opposed to whatever bastardised dialect you used there, why the hell would anyone WANT to read it?
if you don't like it then maybe you should try not commenting at all bastard
 

giuocob

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if you don't like it then maybe you should try not commenting at all bastard

Okay, shut up. Zetsumi's comment was not exactly appropriate, but we've come to expect that of him. However, your reply was much worse. So, all you want is praise and no criticism? If that's true, take you fanfic and go somewhere else where the little kiddies will be more understanding.

And yeah, it could be good if you would spend some more time on your grammar. I suggest you retype it and repost it.
 

Demyxrox

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Joined
Feb 6, 2007
Messages
8
Location
AUST
Okay, shut up. Zetsumi's comment was not exactly appropriate, but we've come to expect that of him. However, your reply was much worse. So, all you want is praise and no criticism? If that's true, take you fanfic and go somewhere else where the little kiddies will be more understanding.

And yeah, it could be good if you would spend some more time on your grammar. I suggest you retype it and repost it.

okay well i've checked through it like 500 times and i can't find anything wrong with the spelling so could please point it out for me?
 

Angel Of Death

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Ok, for one dude your some of your paragrahs are huge, you used "Kay bye", come on. its like KH when to Punk school.
 

Faith Crest

Worst birthday ever.
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I think you need to read up your English a bit more. I have to agree with Zetsumi here. You need to space everything up. Since when have I seen people talking put together like:

“I hope you guys are all right you came out of the sky.” “We’re fine thanks.” I smiled and said “I’m Amy by the way and this is Roxas.” “Hey” he said. The girl said “Well I’m Kairi this is Sora,” “hey” “, and Riku.” “Hey” “umm we’re looking for a guy who has silver hair.” Then Riku said “umm.” “His name is Zexion.”

I have to congratulate you on how much you wrote, but this ^ it's not how speech is supposed to be structured. How about something like this?

“I hope you guys are all right you came out of the sky.”

“We’re fine thanks.” I smiled and said “I’m Amy by the way and this is Roxas.”

“Hey” he said. The girl said

“Well I’m Kairi this is Sora,”

“hey”

“, and Riku.”

“Hey”

“umm we’re looking for a guy who has silver hair.”

Then Riku said “umm.”

“His name is Zexion.”

That's what I mean by speech structure. You can't have it all slumped together all in one and it's hard to read it. I didn't even attempt to read it all because it was just squashed together.

Catch my drift?

Demyxrox said:
okay well i've checked through it like 500 times and i can't find anything wrong with the spelling so could please point it out for me?

One more thing.

If you typed this on Microsoft Word, then I'm sure it would gladly point out all the mistakes you've made already.
 
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