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Fanfiction ► A Heart and a Half~(Roxas, Sora, Adne, Kairi, Namine, Maem)



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Oathkeeper33

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Chapter one.

Darkness. Nothing but Darkness, seeping into all my senses. That horrible smell and feeling. That unbearable noise, it made me everything but comfortable. When vision came back and the sound had stopped, I saw two men, faces concealed by blacks hoods, talking quietly, almost careful as not to be heard. I listened in, hanging in a cocoon of darkness, dripping from the ceiling. I mean, what else did I have to do? The first man had a heavy voice, rough on the ears.

"Have we found him yet?" He said, sounding just a little irritated, arms folded.

"No...Not just yet. He must have slipped into the dark realm. It's highly likely he's trying to find a good host. One capable of wielding two Keyblades." The second man said, this ones voice sounding softer, almost a whisper.

'A Keyblade? What is that?' I thought, now curious. I glanced again at the two men, attempting to gain just a little more information. The first man spoke again.

"We need not concern ourselves with Sora. He still hasn't got a clue of who we are. I, frankly, am more concerned over Roxas. We cannot yet be sure he hasn't found a good host."

The second man folded his arms in thought. He spoke again.

"Fine. If it helps you sleep at night then send some Nobodies into the dark realm to kill him. We needn't be stressing over a traitor."

The second man chuckled, holding his arm out to the air, opening a dark rift. Several white creatures dashed into the rift, as did the two men. And again I was alone. Darkness seeped back in. I fell asleep.
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"Adne, get up!" Maem yelled, shaking me.

I shot up into a sitting position, rubbing my eyes.

"Come on, it's getting dark. Let's go home." She said, a little more gentle now.

She offered her hand, which I took, standing up. I glanced to the sidewalks. I began to walk slowly, giving my legs a little break. Twilight was breaking, and the city bell rang, once, twice, three times. Each time I held my head. Big sounds aren't much appreciated by a person who has just awakened. We took the dirt striken path to the main street, walking down it. I closed my eyes and breathed in the fresh air.

"Hey, Maem, why dont we-" My sentence was interrupted by a scream, which came from Maem. I looked over, seeing several white creatures standing in front of us.

I gasped. My dream! There wasn't any way I could've-Had I? Had I really been awake that whole time? No...that isn't possible. A dark rift opened and a blonde haired kid tripped out. He was weak and tired, bruised and battered. Maem went over to him and helped him up, bringing him over to me. I put his arm around my shoulder and spun around, only to find that I was surrounded by the white creatures. The blonde moaned slowly and stood up.

"You can't run from them," He said cautiosly, "Listen, my name is Roxas and these things are after me. I can't beat these things on my own. Would you mind helping?"

"But I...I've got no weapon." I studdered.

My hand glowed a golden color, and a key shaped sword appeared in my hand. 'Strike that last comment...this will do just fine.' I swung at one of the creatures, hitting its head, causing it to vaporize. Roxas was on the other end of the circle, with two Keyblades, cutting down the creatures at an abnormal rate. I grinned, charging into the rest of my half of the creatures. It took only a few moments to get rid of them all. I looked back to Roxas who was layying on the ground, Maem crouching near him.

"Roxas, what's the matter with you?" I studdered, looking down at his limp, weak body.

"I need a host...we of half heart can only last so long in a shell. So, if I don't find one, I'm going to die." He smiled, a kiddish grin.

"I'll be the host." I muttered.

"I couldn't let you do that. You seem like a kid who has commitments." He stopped grinning, and his legs began to fade.

"Shut up! I'm tired of being treated like a kid!" I yelled, holding his shirt.

Roxas laughed. He laughed. I punched his disappearing stomach, tears dripping down my cheeks.

"How do I get your heart inside of me?" I asked.

"Easy. I go into your stomach, and my half of a heart wraps around your heart."

"Is that gonna hurt?"

"Oh, only a little. Just feels like a sting for a second."

"Then go. I'll be your host," I said, spreading my arms open, "What's the worse that could happen?"

He smiled again.

"That's the way to think, kid. Fine, I'll let you be my host." He said.

Roxas' body faded completly, and a light shot into my heart. He was right, for a second it hurt like hell. I held my heart and dropped to my knees. Then in about 2 seconds the pain disappeared. Completly gone. I stood again, looking around.
'Hey.' Roxas' voice echoed in my head. I replied back. 'Lier, it hurt for two seconds, not one.' He laughed again. 'Well, I'm pretty tired. Good night Adne!' His voice was gone. Well, couldn't be helped. I looked over to where Maem had been to see her on the shoulder of a cloaked man.

"Put her down!" I yelled, charging at him.

Two Keyblades materialized in my hands, and I slashed at him. He put Maem down and blocked me with two big bladed wheels. He pulled his hood off to reveal spiky red hair.

"So that kid found a host after all. Well, now I've been given these icky orders to destroy you both...shucks, I didn't want it to come to this."

He made a large wall of fire that circled around both of us. I stood in the battle stance Roxas had used, Holding the black and white keys tightly. 'Axel...' Roxas' voice echoed again. 'Hey, I thought you were asleep!' I thought back. 'I was, I was. Chill. Just try to fight him like a nobody. He is fast, but don't let that intimidate you. You have Oblivion and Oathkeeper. This can be a lot easier you know. Let go of your body. If you do that I can take over and your body will change to my form.' He said, rather seriously. I thought it over. 'Fine...you win. Don't get us killed.' I suddenly felt his control getting stronger and stronger, until finally he broke free, and our body took Roxas' form.

He twirled Oblivion and Oathkeeper on his fingers. He smiled over to Axel.

"So, "friend", how you been?" He said, with the most devilish grin I had ever seen.

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There we go. Hope y'all like it! I need two reviews before I start the next chapter. Thanks guys!

Btw, 'thoughts' <---That's Roxas or Adne thinking.
(Adne thoughts) <-----This is only Adne thoughts.

Read and review please!

~Oathy
 
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Golden_x_Heart

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Well Oathy, I must say, this is much better than your old fic. I'll give a review -

Okay, first of all, your first section was better written than the second half. It was kinda like you lost your spark on that section. Bring it back.

Even with that though, I think it was pretty good. However, in the next chapter, give more background on Adne and Roxas. Oh, and it seemed a little unlikely that anyone would allow a random person who flew out of a dark swirly portal to merge with them and thier heart. Explain why later?

Besides that, nice job. Proof-read before you post your next chappy though.

<3
 

Oathkeeper33

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Don't worry Goldy, when I post my next chappy, I'll shed a little light on Adne and Roxas, and why he excepted to be the host so quickly. Haha, I really did lose my spark...but it is better. I'll make the Next chappy after a couple more reviews! Yay! Thanks for the review Goldy!:D
 

Daniel Faraday

you fucking...FUCK
Joined
Feb 7, 2006
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Age
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Grab some popcorn, or some edible shit, it's all one and the same for all I care. I'm about to wrench out another tale from my now nearly mythical BAG OF UNDERAPPRECIATED YET MESMERIZING AND MIRACULOUSLY UNTAINTED CONCEPTUALISM!!!!!!™
Oh, hey, I forgot about those.

Hehe...it's a theoretical paradox :p
Anyways, here's a story I'm sure you know from beginning to end, as we all do, a time honered thing that recieves no where near as much recognition as it deserves.

The Happy Folk
Once upon a time at the foot of a great mountain,
There was a town where the people known as Happyfolk lived.
Their very existence a mystery to the rest of the world,
Abscured as it was by grey clouds.
Here they played out their peaceful lives,
Innocent of the litany of excess and violence
That was growing in the world below.
To live in harmony with the spirit of the mountain called Monkey was enough.
Then one day Strangefolk arrived in the town.
They came in camouflage, hidden behind dark glasses,
But no one noticed them: they only saw shadows.
You see, without the Truth of the Eyes, the Happyfolk were blind.

In time, Strangefolk found their way into the high reaches of the mountain,
And it was there that they found the Caves of Unimaginable Sincerity and Giving.
By chance, they stumbled upon the Place Where All Good Souls Come to Rest.
The Strangefolk, they coveted the jewels in these caves above all things,
And soon they began to mine the mountain, its rich seam fueling the chaos of their own world.
Meanwhile, down in the town, the Happyfolk slept restlessly,
Their dreams invaded by shadowy figures digging away at their souls.
Every day, people would wake and stare at the mountain.
Why was it bringing darkness into their lives?
And as the Strangefolk mined deeper and deeper into the mountain,
Holes began to appear, bringing with them a cold and bitter wind that chilled the very soul of them up.
For the first time, the Happyfolk felt fearful for they knew that soon the Monkey would soon stir from its deep sleep.
And then came a sound.
Distant first, it grew into castrophany so immense it could be heard far away in space.
There were no screams.
There was no time.
The mountain called Monkey had spoken.
There was only fire.
And then, nothing.

Then...you've got the little catchy jingle with some meager symbolism behind it, but no one cares about that.

Alright, now list off all the things that occur in this symphony of woe, would you? Or better yet, since you're such a lazy ass, let me do it.
1.The Happy Fold live seperated from the world.
2.Strangefolk come.
3.They dig into mountain.
4.Mountain, in fury, incinerates them.
The end.

Now, look at how long this tale is. It could have easily been shortened to accomodate so little information, but as you can most definatly see, it was elongated. Take a closer look. Was this required for the story to flow smoothly? No. It was an uncalled for necessity. Without that bit of detail, would you ever even bother to look over this whimsical little babbling? I'm guessing you wouldn't.
Hell, I doubt anyone, short of an ignorant child, would.

What I'm getting at is, though your fan fiction features an idea fairly new and generally untouched, it's boring. Stuff happens, but, and I'm sure I've said this before, why the **** should I care? I can't relate to these people. I have no idea why they do what they do, it's completely unnatural, or rather, too much the opposite. Your people are the stereotypical heroes, I can't distinguish between them, and, say, Sora, were I to compare them. They have no depth. They're like the paper I'm scribbling on, they're completly two dimensional (not to be confused with 2D, of course >_>) and whatever you say, they never seem to be more than that.
When it comes to actions, people do things.
That's all I can say.
Well, maybe I can say more, and maybe I will
A dark rift opened and a blonde haired kid tripped out. He was weak and tired, bruised and battered. Maem went over to him and helped him up, bringing him over to me. I put his arm around my shoulder and spun around, only to find that I was surrounded by the white creatures. The blonde moaned slowly and stood up.
Take this, for example.
A dark rift, possibly an empitome of darkness and sin so vile that it has yet to be regarded as something mankind can actually create sputters into life in front of these two, spits out a kid, then vanishes. This is condensed down to your first sentance, with little more than every other word plastered in there. Worse yet, everyone acts as though this is completely appropriate, as though this happens regularly. Again, this goes back to them acting more human.

What can I say? I could, as of now, have plastered this message in every one of your stories with no hesitation. It applies to every one of them, the same problems are reoccuring.
Write me something where all of these problems are fixed, and I'll be your servent for a day. I'll do anything you ****ing want, you could even beat me and call me deragatory names, if you're into that (which, for the love of god, I hope you aren't ;__;). Just...get this right. I'm giving you insentive to work on it, even. You're dedicated, I can see that from this being your fifth story in the last four months. However, you aren't dedicated enough, you just chock out tale after tale with no intention of actually getting anything CORRECT. You just create based upon intuition, which is what neandrathals did with stone tools meant to club small animals into submission.
Please, just ****ing try to follow through with these things.
Not just for me (so I don't ****ing have to write so much!), but for yourself, as well. This is a skill you'll most definatly need later in life, so you really should work on it now, prior to college, where a professor is bound to insult and humiliate you until you're forced to receade into a state of mental paralysis and continuous paranoia.
Incidentaly, nobody likes the psych ward.
...
*shudder*
Kingdom Hospital....
*shudder*
...
~Fenris Etheral, whose fingers really hurt ;__;
 

Daniel Faraday

you fucking...FUCK
Joined
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GORRAM CATS IN MY GORRAM CEILING!!!!!11!!!

...

I mean, uh, we need to go see Scary Movie 4 this weekend. See if 'Maem' (As in what a bear does to a curious camper >_>) can come with us, I know she'd like that.
Write more, me and my brother were....ah, I suppose you could call it...entertained with this recent enstallment.
~Fenris Etheral, over and out, homies.
 
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Daniel Faraday

you fucking...FUCK
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:blinks: Fenris, that was probably the most awkward review I've ever read...
You call it awkward, I call it...immaculate.
...
Well, maybe that was a bit egotistical.
MAYBE.
~Fenris Etheral
 

Oathkeeper33

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Okay...I'm sick...this means I don't want to write a chappy. But since its Goldy's birthday today, I'm putting one up just for her! Don't throw tomatoes at me if it stinks!

[Disembodied voice]

Flash backs.

Chapter two.

Roxas kept twirling the blades with his fingers, glaring at Axel. He took a step forward with his front foot and stopped twirling the blades.

“So. Exactly how long do you guys think you can fool me with your false sentiment? You people don’t know me! And on that subject, you never will! Quit coming after me!” Roxas screamed, allowing a moment for Axel to develop a response.

“Roxas…I…” He managed, bowing his head.

“You know what? Forget it. I don’t want to hear it.” Roxas said quietly, “I’m done messing around.”

Roxas held his keyblades steady again, ready to fight. Axel took his fire wheels and brought them into a battle stance as well. At the exact same moment, they charged at each other. Roxas did a flip and sliced in, bringing his blades to Axel’s chest. He cut and flipped back to the ground, raining out flurries of combos, knocking him into the air. He jumped up and pinned Axel to the floor, and pillars of light emerged. Axel was down. Easy as that.

“You’ve gotten better Roxas…” Axel stuttered. He held his heart gently. “This is where I say goodbye…friend…”

Axel’s body began to fade and Roxas slipped back, allowing me to take control again. I walked to him.

“Axel…” I said, head bowed in sorrow and respect. I couldn’t seem to handle it. That’s when I noticed. Roxas’ emotions were mixed with mine. It was unbelievable sorrow and pain I felt, which I had felt only once before. And that was when…

Flashback

“Daddy! Dad! Come back Dad, Come back!” My father left to the loading dock and took a Gummi Ship. He turned on the engine and began to rise. I got there and screamed.

“Take me too! I can help you! I’m not some damn child anymore!”

“Sorry kid.” He replied. “Who else would look after your mom?”

And with that he left. Leaving me to feel useless. Leaving me here, abandoning us. I felt pain, sorrow, and I broke down and cried, for the first time in years. I’d never be treated like a kid again. NEVER.
End Flashback

‘So that’s why you accepted the host responsibility so quickly Adne…It made you feel adult like? Responsible?’ Roxas said, sounding a tad troubled.

‘Yeah. My mom treats me like a child everyday. I couldn’t let you start too. And even then, I’ve been having odd dreams lately…like, fighting big dark creatures.’ I said back.

‘Ah. Your Awakening…’

‘What?’

‘I’m tired! G’night Adne!’

(Hopeless…)

I walked to Maem, picking her up in my arms. I took her to her house, setting her down on her couch, and leaving. Instead of heading home, I decided to make an attempt at training my sword skills with this new Key-thingy. I tied wooden planks to a tree’s branches and began to swing at them like they were those white creatures. I arrived home late, about 10:30. My mother was asleep on the couch, so I fixed myself dinner. I did the dishes and crawled into my bed, hoping that tomorrow didn’t come too soon.

--XXX—

I opened my eyes slowly, blinking before getting up to my knees. I glanced around. Darkness. The word shot into my mind like a bullet. I looked at the floor. A stain glass artwork that showed Roxas and a brown haired kid back to back. I stood up carefully, hoping that this platform wouldn’t break below me. After getting comfortable with the platform, I walked along its edges, in a circle. Once back to my spot, three lights glimmered, creating a sword, a shield, and a staff.

[Choose wisely child. In your hands is the fate of the universe.]

“What?! Who’s there?!” I yelled, turning from side to side.

[Choose your weapon. Your questions will be answered in good time.]

I walked to the sword, grabbing it from the air and holding it in my hands. I looked up and said, “Now what?”

[Do you wish to prioritize offense?]

I nodded, holding the blade tightly in my right hand.

[Very well.]
A door appeared in front of me. [Proceed child. The time has come for you to meet your destiny.]

I summoned up my courage and opened the door, stepping through to another platform, with the same design, but a different color, yellow.
I gasped at what was straight ahead. A massive white creature with what looked slightly similar to an upside down heart on its face. A light appeared in my hand and I was holding my keyblade again. I got into my battle stance and waited for the creature to charge. It did so in 10 seconds after noticing me, and waved its hand. I was held by my hands and feet in the air by little white orbs. The creature made a punch, but I unhitched my legs and right arm and struck its face with the keyblade. It grabbed me and threw me into the air, and tried to hit me again, but I somersaulted in air and hit its face again. It slid off of the edge of the platform and I ran to the other side of it looking for the creature. All of a sudden, the creature flipped the platform sideways and I planted my keyblade into it and hung from it. The creature made a huge orb of energy which he finished and was ready to throw, but I stopped him by throwing my keyblade into the middle.

It exploded and sent the platform back to normal, while the creature vaporized.

‘Wow. You did better than me!’ Roxas said, voice echoing.

‘What?!’
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There you go! I hope ya guys like it! And Happy Birthday Goldy! I hope you like your present!:D
 

Golden_x_Heart

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The chappy was pretty good Oathy! If anything, you were still a little redundent with certain words. Your improving though!
Thanks for the happy birthday! Sorry you aren't feeling well.
Anyways, keep up the improvement! PM me if you ever want any extra help, or have any questions! =D
<3
 

Daniel Faraday

you fucking...FUCK
Joined
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Messages
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So....little motivation to write a review...
I'll get to it....eventually.

Right now, I've got to watch the Third Hokage get his ass handed to him by Orochimaru.
...
Damn Naruto.
~Fenris Etheral, momentarily distracted.
 

Daniel Faraday

you fucking...FUCK
Joined
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Messages
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Age
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You stole my goblins, you ass-hole!
Anyways...done with Naruto and moving onto the Colbert Report. I love getting iTunes money for Easter :D
Happy hallmark-manipulated-once-Christian-turned-Satanic-mammelian-worship-day, all of you!
...
Just kidding :p I love Jesus and every holiday associated with him, no matter how ****ed up it's been by obscure but once recognized and applauded ideals (how the hell does the rabbit fir in?)
So yeah, have a great Easter.
~Fenris Etheral, aiding the bumpage.
 
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