1st annual KH2 Joke-Off!

[GTX]

Hello and welcome to the first joke off. For those who sent in request to be in it, I'm sorrry spot are filled. Well me and ten contestants. We now have 10 people! GTX, Fantasygurl, Hidden, Loserfreak, darkness_boy, twilight darkness, Dream Heart, Lunar love, kerobaroes, and Sora's Son. They have 24 hours to post their joke or they will be disqualified. Of course this poll will close in 24 hours so vote people. And the two people with the lowest vote loses, so try to wait for every contestant to put theres on. I'm up first.

Sora: I miss Kairi. Let me write her a letter and throw it in the ocean.

Dear Kairi,
I am writing this slow because I know that you can't read fast.

The worlds are real nice. We have a washing machine in our train, whopi. I don't think it works too well. Last week I put my keyblade in, pulled the chain, and haven't seen it since.

The weather isn't too bad here, it only rained twice last week, The first time it rained for three days and the second time for four days. Goofy locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were worried because it took him two hours to get me and Donald out.

Your Donald had a baby this morning but I haven't found out what it is yet, so I don't know if I'm an aunt or an uncle. If the baby is a girl, your hes is going to name it after me, she's going to call it @$$hole.

Riku, Namine, and BHK went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Riku was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your two blonde friends were in the back. They drowned because they couldn't get the tailgate down.

There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened. Oh, now if you'll excuse me I have to fight millions of heartless.

PS, I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already sealed.

Now for hiddens since he couldn't come.

Alright GTX, I'm not going to be here Saturday. If you're still short on people though, you can post this one from me, but let's get two things clear right now.

Thing #1: I'm doing this merely to take up space so you can run this darnedable competition. We both know that I'm not a joke-telling type myself. So, should there be an overflow of people, cut me out. If not, I'll make good first-round fodder so that people can vote off somebody at least.

Thing #2: I don't make jokes. Can't? Won't? What's it matter, it just isn't happening. Therefore this one is copied from something else, all I'm doing is changing the names. If this is against your rules (I never read rules), sorry, this is all I could come up with.
* * *
Riku and Sora were both driving (Yes, they can drive suddenly. No, I don't know how it's possible considering there are no roads in any KH world thus far. Just go with it people). They crash into each other. Both of them jump out of their cars. Riku looks at Sora, reaches into his car, pulls out a bottle, then walks over to Sora.
Riku- Hey Sora, are you alright?
Sora- I... I think so.
Riku- You seem a bit shook up. Here, have a taste of this, it'll help steady you.
Sora takes a drink, staggers under the heavy alcohol, then tries to hand it back.
Sora- Thanks...
Riku- No, you still look a bit pale. You'd better have another.
Sora takes another, deeper drink. He tries to hand it back.
Riku- No man, trust me, I'm fine. You need it.
And so it continues for another five minutes. Finally, Sora asks in a very slurred voice (the bottle is almost empty) if Riku's sure he doesn't want some.
Riku- No, none for me. I'm just waiting for the cops to show up.

HA HA! Ha! Haaa... yeah. Well, there's my joke. If you didn't like it- vote me off. If you do... well, vote me off anyway, because I can't think of anymore. Besides, we've got better ones here anyway (at least I hope so).
* * *
There's your joke GTX. Just post it for me Saturday, cool?

Contestant post soon because the contest starts now.

 

[Lunar Love]

w00t! This' fun!

Me: TODAY ON KH INTERVIEWS AND CRAP I WISH I COULD COME UP WITH A CATCHIER TITLE BUT I SUCK AT BEGINNINGS OF JOKES.
Sora: ...wtf?
Me: It’s also called KIACIWICCUWACTBISABOJ. Rolls right off the tongue, right?
Sora: ...sure.
Me: Today I’m interviewing a set of random people I captur... invited over here!
Sora: help me... O___O
Me: First off is Sora since he was the only one brave enough not to be scared off by my enormous lack of attention span.
Sora: HELP ME. O_O
Me: First question; Sora I understand it’s hard competing with such hot... awesome FF males, how do you do it?
Sora: I...never thought of it that way.
Me: I mean, your keyblade isn’t as big as Cloud’s sword is it?
Sora: No, but he’s compensatin----
Me: LIES. And you have a large...key...how does that compete against swords?
Sora: Apparently it wins.

Me: ~mumbles choice words~ ...anyhow, next question! How do you feel about Kairi?
Sora: Feel?
Me: Yes, you know, do you like her, love her, hate her, date her?
Sora: ....that’s supposed to be a secret...
Me: Hmm?
Sora: Nothing.
Me: Okay, how do you feel about Riku? Do like him, love him, hate him, date him?
Sora: T-THOSE HOT TUB SCENES MEANT NOTHING.
Me: ...omg.
Sora: ~runs off stage~
Me: <_< Crap, lost another one. Oh well still got 302480324 left.
Riku: ...No, you don’t.....
Me: FINE, I have like 7 left, ~defensive~ THAT DOESN’T MEAN NO ONE LIKES ME!! That ends our show!
Riku: B-but, I only had one line!!
Me: TOO BAD. ~does moody female thing and runs off her own stage~

 

[GTX]

7 people need to post by 5 PM. Well here in Cali. right now its 9:40. So if they don't bye bye

 

[darkness_boy6]

at the end of kh

*sora runs up to kairi*
kairi: sora remember what i told u im dating goofy
Sora: Well guess what Im dating Yuffie so I dont care
*simple and clean starts*
Sora: wtf turn that f**kin music off
Sora and Kairi together : Im outta here

 

[GTX]

6 people left. but people are already voting. Well lowest vote loses. I guess jokes help your rep on voteing.

 

[darkness_boy6]

your winning right now GTX but not for long

 

[GTX]

excellent. Other people better post soon.

 

[darkness_boy6]

yeah i no wat u mean

 

[darkness_boy6]

how much time do we have left sorry for double post

 

[GTX]

OK, since the forums were closed I might redo the joke off. Possibly.

 

[sili~*]

I've got one.
At the end of KH:
Goofy: This is a green field, Ain't it Donald?
Donald: Whatever.
Sora: What's wrong?
Donald: *violin starts playing* I miss my darling Daisy.
Sora: Your flower?
Donald: No, you idiot!!!*strings break on violin* My girlfriend!!
Sora: You dated a flower?
Donald: *organ takes place of violin* I ougta kill you.
Goofy: Is there anyway we can help, Donald?
Donald: *piano falls on organ and starts playing* Well, there is one thing *get's evil grin on face and clears throat*
Sora, Goofy:...
Donald: *takes deep breath* BADY BALOOGA IN THE DEEP BLUE SEA!!!!
Sora: *covering ears and screaming* DAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! *runs off*
Donald: That always cheers me up.
Goofy:Gwarsh, ... I'd ougta remember that.
----------------------------------------------------
My friend Virginia hates that song. I can't even say "baby" in her presences.
That's I came up with this.

 

[Dream Heart]

if I'm still in, here mine:

*Sora, Riku, Kairi, Donald, and Goofy on the set of KH, 3 years ago)

Sora: damn! I'm so bored!
Kairi: you can't cuse! it a E-rated game.
Sora: oh my bad.
Donald *thinking*: I got a idea!
*Donald whispering into Sora and Goofy ear, "blah blah blah blah"*
*Sora, Donald, Goofy go into their dressing rooms*
*Sora, Donald, Goofy come out of their dressing rooms in 70s clothes, Goofy has a afro on*
Kairi: huh?
Riku: WTF?!
*Sora, Donald, and Goofy jump on a table and do every single dance move there is, Sora does the Macarena, Donald does the Electric Slide, Goofy about to do a split*
Goofy: watch this!
*Goofy does the split but he looks highly uncomforble*
Goofy: *does his famous scream*
Everyone: >.<

 

[darkness_boy6]

make a new thread and start this all over again

 

[UsagiOkami]

make a new thread and start this all over again

that is a good idea. because i could not get on! those who could..lucky bugs.