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- Mar 7, 2010
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Have you ever had legitimately evil thoughts at some point in your lifetime, like murdering someone you're fed up with? And not in a petty-3-year-old way, but in an actual morally-disturbed-adult way.
I don't want to encourage evil thoughts or anything like that - I'm long past that phase. But at the end of the day, I only made this thread to have people share their experiences with enemies within. Starting with me:
It all started in 2011. I was embittered by the shit school I was enrolled in - noisy students, incompetent teachers, money-grubbing staff. And then came 2012.
I barely felt the will to keep studying, instead wanting to beat up my classmates for diddlying around so much. I got low grades, forcing me into a kind of "recovery" test (in BR, you get tests to better your low grades. that's how it works)
I didn't even study because I hated school that much. Then my dad threw a fit about it and my mom's issues with his Freemasonry membership.
That was when my enemy within was born.
I decided I was going to stab my dad in his sleep and do the same to my classmates at the day of the test. But one thing I didn't count on was that I had an appointment with my psychologist (which I had been going to since April, I believe).
We had a chat about what I wanted to do. Normally because she's a psychologist she would've kept quiet about it, but because it was a risky situation, she told my mom about it. She cried and the psychologist recommended a psychiatrist, who I see sporadically.
And I never went to school again after that. But I'm taking music and Japanese courses.
To this day, awful thoughts related to things I don't like pop up occasionally, and I constantly try to fight them back.
What about you, people of KHI?
I don't want to encourage evil thoughts or anything like that - I'm long past that phase. But at the end of the day, I only made this thread to have people share their experiences with enemies within. Starting with me:
It all started in 2011. I was embittered by the shit school I was enrolled in - noisy students, incompetent teachers, money-grubbing staff. And then came 2012.
I barely felt the will to keep studying, instead wanting to beat up my classmates for diddlying around so much. I got low grades, forcing me into a kind of "recovery" test (in BR, you get tests to better your low grades. that's how it works)
I didn't even study because I hated school that much. Then my dad threw a fit about it and my mom's issues with his Freemasonry membership.
That was when my enemy within was born.
I decided I was going to stab my dad in his sleep and do the same to my classmates at the day of the test. But one thing I didn't count on was that I had an appointment with my psychologist (which I had been going to since April, I believe).
We had a chat about what I wanted to do. Normally because she's a psychologist she would've kept quiet about it, but because it was a risky situation, she told my mom about it. She cried and the psychologist recommended a psychiatrist, who I see sporadically.
And I never went to school again after that. But I'm taking music and Japanese courses.
To this day, awful thoughts related to things I don't like pop up occasionally, and I constantly try to fight them back.
What about you, people of KHI?
