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Help/Support ► Ugh, okay. I need advice/more just to vent.



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nicoleohbugga

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Okay, I know I'm newish, and you guys don't really know me, so I'll say a little something about myself and my current issues. I am twenty years old, going to be twenty one on the thirtieth of this month(yay!) Living at home with my parents, no job, no school, no car. The reason I have none of these is basically my parents fault. And I'm not saying that to be like every other person who dislikes their family, like really, they are trapping me.
So first, we'll talk about the no car issue. I don't even have my permit yet. Sad, huh? My parents don't want to take me to the dmv, even though they will tell you a different story. They use all the excuses in the book to why they can't take me. My parents will tell people that it's my fault we haven't gone.. This is not true. I took Drivers Ed in high school when I was sixteen. I've been ready to go get my permit for five years now. I finally just had to do something about it and set up an appointment for the dmv on my birthday. I would have liked to have a license and maybe a car by then, but oh well.
So now, there's the job. I've never had one, and as many of you are aware, it is almost impossible to get a job these days without any kind of experience. I finally went to an interview for the Little Caesars in Kmart, and they told me I had the job and to expect a call in a couple of days.. That was last Tuesday, and I haven't had one call, though I keep getting modelling offers that I'm not interested in. My issue is, what do I do? I'm planning on calling them tomorrow, I just don't know how much more of this I can take, you know? I'm trying so hard to get a job, so then maybe, I can save money to get a car, and go to school..
And that's my next issue..Schooling. I have no money, no car, no hope. We only have one car at my house, and my dad uses it for more than half of the day. So I couldn't really rely on him to drive me to school. Especially when the ones that offer massage therapy are at least forty minutes away.
So basically, these three things are driving me crazy right now..But that's not the worst, my family treats me like I'm a teenager in high school. I'm turning twenty one, and my boyfriend is turning twenty three this thursday, but they don't even like us to be alone.. He's not allowed to sleep in my room, but we are fine at his house.. I know telling you this is pretty pointless, I just need someone from the outside to hear what's going on, you know? Let me know what you have to say, just don't be harsh. :p Thank you for your time.
 

MomentoMori

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Don't worry about getting your license; I was 18 by the time I actually got over my fear of driving (a friend of mine had died in a car accident our sophomore year of high school, so that's what got me so scared to drive) and was able to finally get a permit and license.
 

nicoleohbugga

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I'm not worried, and I know some people still don't have it that are my age, but when I am held against my will to obtain it, then it bothers me.
 

nicoleohbugga

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Lol, my boyfriend drives me around all the time.. I feel bad, because he's trying to save his money, and like, we only see each other maybe three days out of the week..and those three days, he's driving, and buying us food.. I just feel so bad, I wish I could do more for him, and myself. I can't even go to school, I feel so pathetic, you know?
 

denizenofevil

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School and getting a job sound like number one priorities for you. Do whatever you have to do to get the job and get an education. You're right. You are trapped and it's because you don't have an education past high school because you can't afford it. Get that job and do whatever you can to get yourself to work on time. Walk, take the bus, have friends drive you or whatever. Call Kmart back and ask about the job. It shows that you do actually want to work. As far as the boyfriend not being able to sleep in your room, as long as you are living with your parents, you will have to deal with that rule. However, you are not a minor and they can't tell you that you can't be alone with him.
 

nicoleohbugga

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Yeah, I agree with everything you've said. I have a bike, which I love, and kmart isn't too far. So I could easily bike when I have to. My boyfriend doesn't want me biking home after dark though, but my dad is usually home around four-six, so getting a ride after dark wont be a problem. The reason it bothers me so much that can't sleep in my room is because my sister and her boyfriend were able to when she was nineteen. Yes, they were dating longer than we were, but they, or at least she, was a lot younger. To me, that would seem worse, right? I don't like to compare my relationship to my sister's, because they are completely different, as far as personality. But I know for a fact that my relationship is a lot more mature, she's more of the wild one..so why am I the one who is treated so poorly, you know? It's fine, because since I rarely see my boyfriend, my parents let me sleep over at his place. If he lived closer, which he used to, that would not be okay at all. They wouldn't even let us stay at a hotel by the beach for a few days after we were together for a year. It's just stuff like that, that totally annoys me!
I plan on calling them, I just don't want to be disappointed again.. I know if they do turn me down, that I have to keep trying, but it's just so hard. UGH. Thanks for giving me your input though.
 

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if you killed off your parents you wouldn't have these problems
 

nicoleohbugga

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if you killed off your parents you wouldn't have these problems
Hahaha, that would solve everything! T_T
What I'm planning on doing is just move out when I get a car. My boyfriend's dad said he would help and put money in for one, but I need my license before we can just go get one, you know? Haha, doesn't my life sound great? Actually, it is. I love my life, and I am happy with the person I am. I'm just not okay with my situation, and I plan on fixing it by the end of the summer. That is my goal. :)
 

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I still don't understand why parents behave this way...
Don't they realize their lives will end sooner than ours?
Jus sayin
 

nicoleohbugga

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Idk, I'd like to say its the middle child syndrome, even though I don't agree with it.. I am a middle child. They spoil my younger brother and worship my older sister, and me? Well, I'm the one they ignore and don't care if I can't move on when I'm stuck here.
 

Killa DeX

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Trying moving out into maybe your boyfriends house or get an apartment, try to settle down with a job and school.
Then later one save up for a car. Try baby steps. As for your parents, your basically living under their roof there's not much you can do,
but your almost twenty one so you can move out whenever you want, then you only have to listen to yourself.
Try getting a job, then moving out, then school, then car.
 

Laine

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Okay, I know I'm newish, and you guys don't really know me, so I'll say a little something about myself and my current issues. I am twenty years old, going to be twenty one on the thirtieth of this month(yay!) Living at home with my parents, no job, no school, no car. The reason I have none of these is basically my parents fault. And I'm not saying that to be like every other person who dislikes their family, like really, they are trapping me.
So first, we'll talk about the no car issue. I don't even have my permit yet. Sad, huh? My parents don't want to take me to the dmv, even though they will tell you a different story. They use all the excuses in the book to why they can't take me. My parents will tell people that it's my fault we haven't gone.. This is not true. I took Drivers Ed in high school when I was sixteen. I've been ready to go get my permit for five years now. I finally just had to do something about it and set up an appointment for the dmv on my birthday. I would have liked to have a license and maybe a car by then, but oh well.
So now, there's the job. I've never had one, and as many of you are aware, it is almost impossible to get a job these days without any kind of experience. I finally went to an interview for the Little Caesars in Kmart, and they told me I had the job and to expect a call in a couple of days.. That was last Tuesday, and I haven't had one call, though I keep getting modelling offers that I'm not interested in. My issue is, what do I do? I'm planning on calling them tomorrow, I just don't know how much more of this I can take, you know? I'm trying so hard to get a job, so then maybe, I can save money to get a car, and go to school..
And that's my next issue..Schooling. I have no money, no car, no hope. We only have one car at my house, and my dad uses it for more than half of the day. So I couldn't really rely on him to drive me to school. Especially when the ones that offer massage therapy are at least forty minutes away.
So basically, these three things are driving me crazy right now..But that's not the worst, my family treats me like I'm a teenager in high school. I'm turning twenty one, and my boyfriend is turning twenty three this thursday, but they don't even like us to be alone.. He's not allowed to sleep in my room, but we are fine at his house.. I know telling you this is pretty pointless, I just need someone from the outside to hear what's going on, you know? Let me know what you have to say, just don't be harsh. :p Thank you for your time.

Why not??
 

nicoleohbugga

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Trying moving out into maybe your boyfriends house or get an apartment, try to settle down with a job and school.
Then later one save up for a car. Try baby steps. As for your parents, your basically living under their roof there's not much you can do,
but your almost twenty one so you can move out whenever you want, then you only have to listen to yourself.
Try getting a job, then moving out, then school, then car.
Well, a car would have to come second in my goals..because without the car, I can't go to school. My boyfriend lives with his parents. He had his own business but it wasn't working out so he had to move in with them, and they want me to move in with them too. But they live in such a small apartment right now. They are moving closer to where I live by the end of the summer, so that's why I'm saying that things will get better by then. I just can't live in that apartment right now. I'd rather just try to do things on my own now, and then when I feel that I am in the right position to, I'll move out, you know?

Why not??
Because I signed up for it not really taking it seriously. I'm 5'3 and out of shape. Not saying I'm fat, just more like weak looking, lol. They want me to do a runway walk in the mall, and then maybe have an agent call after. I'm just not in the mood to wait in line with a whole bunch of sixteen year olds to walk on a board, then be judged by it.
 

khluva010

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Okay, I know I'm newish, and you guys don't really know me, so I'll say a little something about myself and my current issues. I am twenty years old, going to be twenty one on the thirtieth of this month(yay!) Living at home with my parents, no job, no school, no car. The reason I have none of these is basically my parents fault. And I'm not saying that to be like every other person who dislikes their family, like really, they are trapping me.

Well happy almost birthday! And your parents are just rude

So first, we'll talk about the no car issue. I don't even have my permit yet. Sad, huh? My parents don't want to take me to the dmv, even though they will tell you a different story. They use all the excuses in the book to why they can't take me. My parents will tell people that it's my fault we haven't gone.. This is not true. I took Drivers Ed in high school when I was sixteen. I've been ready to go get my permit for five years now. I finally just had to do something about it and set up an appointment for the dmv on my birthday. I would have liked to have a license and maybe a car by then, but oh well.

All bad.

And that's my next issue..Schooling. I have no money, no car, no hope. We only have one car at my house, and my dad uses it for more than half of the day. So I couldn't really rely on him to drive me to school. Especially when the ones that offer massage therapy are at least forty minutes away.
So basically, these three things are driving me crazy right now..But that's not the worst, my family treats me like I'm a teenager in high school. I'm turning twenty one, and my boyfriend is turning twenty three this thursday, but they don't even like us to be alone.. He's not allowed to sleep in my room, but we are fine at his house..

I feel so sorry for you

I know telling you this is pretty pointless, I just need someone from the outside to hear what's going on, you know? Let me know what you have to say, just don't be harsh. :p Thank you for your time.

It’s not pointless at all, the issue is that you’re trapped in a home where your parents won’t let you grow up and are trying to run your life and not let you grow. You need to get out of that house! As soon as you turn 21 (since you’ll be a legal adult) you should move out to your boyfriend’s house or another relative and start a new life without them for now. They can’t trap you forever. Sorry if this doesn’t help, good luck with everything!
 

nicoleohbugga

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Well happy almost birthday! And your parents are just rude



All bad.



I feel so sorry for you



It’s not pointless at all, the issue is that you’re trapped in a home where your parents won’t let you grow up and are trying to run your life and not let you grow. You need to get out of that house! As soon as you turn 21 (since you’ll be a legal adult) you should move out to your boyfriend’s house or another relative and start a new life without them for now. They can’t trap you forever. Sorry if this doesn’t help, good luck with everything!
Thank you for the birthday thing. :)
I have an update for this thread, and that is that Kmart called me today, and I have my second interview tomorrow. When I did my first interview last week, one of the employees said the second interview was basically just a like drug testing/orientation thingy, so if she was right that means I got the job!!! If I get it, I am going to be so happpyy. :) OGgjakgljaglkjagkljafghjgljhaFL.
Okay, now back to business. I don't have any relatives around here, they are all forty minutes to an hour away, so that wouldn't work, especially with the possible job at Kmart. When the time is right, I'll leave. I'm not going to go live somewhere and have to pay rent, when at my family's house, I don't, you know? I'd rather stay here while I need to, so I can save for the important things, like a car! :D Haha. So yeah, wish me luck tomorrow everyone! :)
 

nicoleohbugga

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HEY, so I just want to update everyone and let you guys know that I GOT THE JOBBBB! Well, technically, not yet. I still have to do a drug test on monday, but after that, it's mine! :)
 
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