I am going to have to go with Sam on this one, it doesn't sound that sound that safe at all. I mean once she gets your info she could be gone, and do you really even know how you are going to get there? I don't think it is the greatest of ideas, I mean if you knew her on a personal level then maybe, but never meeting the girl is a different story.
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As Sam said, this is a case of you 'following your dick and imagination halfway across the country'. Harsh, but true.
What you're not acknowledging is that living with someone is entirely different than talking to someone online, when it suits you, and on your own terms. You're going to be around each other 24/7, and should you not get on with her, or have a lovers' tiff, all these problems are going to be amplified by the fact you're occupying the same space.
There’s no other motivation for you moving; you’re pinning ALL your hopes on her. So if things don’t work out as you expected with her, you’re potentially 1500 miles away from anyone you know, so you'll have no infrastructure of support, and will be left with an unsatisfactory job and a lot of misery. Personally I think this could be very emasculating for you.
It might be different if you'd met her a couple of times, but this is a commitment you're making prematurely, and without consideration for the practicalities. You should also ask yourself - if the tables were turned, would she do this for you?
What you're not acknowledging is that living with someone is entirely different than talking to someone online, when it suits you, and on your own terms. You're going to be around each other 24/7, and should you not get on with her, or have a lovers' tiff, all these problems are going to be amplified by the fact you're occupying the same space.
There’s no other motivation for you moving; you’re pinning ALL your hopes on her. So if things don’t work out as you expected with her, you’re potentially 1500 miles away from anyone you know, so you'll have no infrastructure of support, and will be left with an unsatisfactory job and a lot of misery. Personally I think this could be very emasculating for you.
It might be different if you'd met her a couple of times, but this is a commitment you're making prematurely, and without consideration for the practicalities. You should also ask yourself - if the tables were turned, would she do this for you?
That is a good question I think. Didn't really think about that. Yeah that is another thing that you have to check on in a relationship is equality, if she isn't willing to go the distance for you, why should you go the distance for her.
she has a 1 year old daughter so it would be harder for her to up and leave.
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....So you're kind of going to be a stepdad?
My alarms going off very loudly right now....back out....back the fuck out....
My alarms going off very loudly right now....back out....back the fuck out....
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Taylor says:
So she's manipulated in the past, is a single mother with a one-year old daughter, lives on the other side of the country, and you've never actually met her in person before?
....yes. Yes, make this happen.
Immediately.
You're done, guy.
Hate to repeat the sentiment, but that is a good sign that this is a very bad idea.
but if you still want to go through with this, go out there and do everything yourself instead of over the internet, or at least meet her in real life and see what you think
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Don't freaking do it. You think you're in love but you're not. You may think its real but its ALL AN ILLUSION. The fact that you've never met is already a sign that it is wrong. Regardless of what you may feel right now, your conscience is already telling you not to do it. (Thread)
Dude, the slightest doubt means its not worth it, if you really think this is going to work, then you wouldn't EVEN BE MAKING A THREAD, you'd say yes immediately and go get her, but you didn't, a part of you knows that what you're doing is stupid & dangerous. Just stop & go find someone else, I know its easier said than done, but come on, are you willing to sacrifice everything you have, for someone you never met & for something you don't even know is real.
Here's one more thing, she has a 1 YEAR OLD KID, not 3 not for 4, 1 one uno. So while you were chatting on the web, she was out there having fun in bed, for all you know, by the time you get there, she invites guys over everyday to have fun with her, can you live with that? Do you think you can handle something like that everyday? She might even be using you, so she doesn't have to take care of the kid.
Anyway, I'm tired seeing threads like this, I've been in a very similar situations, and I for one knows that the guy who made this thread already made up his mind. Usually the fact that this thread even exist means the guy is doomed to make his life a living hell. Dude, seriously just don't do it, I don't want you to end up like me, who, after 3 years is still suffering from the humiliation I had from an online relationship.
Dude, the slightest doubt means its not worth it, if you really think this is going to work, then you wouldn't EVEN BE MAKING A THREAD, you'd say yes immediately and go get her, but you didn't, a part of you knows that what you're doing is stupid & dangerous. Just stop & go find someone else, I know its easier said than done, but come on, are you willing to sacrifice everything you have, for someone you never met & for something you don't even know is real.
Here's one more thing, she has a 1 YEAR OLD KID, not 3 not for 4, 1 one uno. So while you were chatting on the web, she was out there having fun in bed, for all you know, by the time you get there, she invites guys over everyday to have fun with her, can you live with that? Do you think you can handle something like that everyday? She might even be using you, so she doesn't have to take care of the kid.
Anyway, I'm tired seeing threads like this, I've been in a very similar situations, and I for one knows that the guy who made this thread already made up his mind. Usually the fact that this thread even exist means the guy is doomed to make his life a living hell. Dude, seriously just don't do it, I don't want you to end up like me, who, after 3 years is still suffering from the humiliation I had from an online relationship.
What doe sher having a child have to do with it? Should every single person with a kid be blown off?
Alright, nobody try to help him anymore: clearly he isn't going to listen to a thing we say.
Stop using us to justify your irrational thoughts. If you're already set on doing it, then do it. Don't try to ask us for advice only to deny or question everything we say.
Stop using us to justify your irrational thoughts. If you're already set on doing it, then do it. Don't try to ask us for advice only to deny or question everything we say.
So
You want to leave your family, friends, people you know, and a steady job for some girl you met online, haven't met at all, no idea what she is really like, hang onto the possibility that she will dump you within the month, leaving you in a strange place, nowhere to go, no one you know, probably forced to go back home with your head in shame.
Oh no. This sounds like a fantastic idea.
You want to leave your family, friends, people you know, and a steady job for some girl you met online, haven't met at all, no idea what she is really like, hang onto the possibility that she will dump you within the month, leaving you in a strange place, nowhere to go, no one you know, probably forced to go back home with your head in shame.
Oh no. This sounds like a fantastic idea.
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you guys missed the biggest problem here
is she a babe or not?
if she is,then YES,GO FOR IT
if she's not then NO,NOT EVER
is she a babe or not?
if she is,then YES,GO FOR IT
if she's not then NO,NOT EVER
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Really, dude? REALLY?
Okay, forget everything I've said prior to this. You go right ahead and do it.
Counter Shock, think about this from someone else's perspective.
You would be right on side with Sam. It is really like an episode of family guy or something absurd like that.
There are so many things wrong with this situation. i supported this idea when it seemed harmless and fun. But, you cant get involved with a single mother on a whim like this. It may seem noble to save them from their troubles but it seems stupid to me.
My girlfriend told me she had a kid (turns out she was lying and having a good laugh behind the scenes) and I know how you feel. I am only 17 and she is 16 but I never thought I would leave her. In the 10 minutes she let me think she was a mother (which was actually quite possible for her, as she from japan and is only here for a year. She could easily have a kid back home.), I was planning how I would help her. I was thinking about how I needed to change to support her and her child.
I love her. I dont want to leave her over this.
I was actually planning on supporting my 16 year old girlfriend, who has another person's child, who lives in another country and is moving back this year. If that strikes you as a wrong move, then you need to reconsider your choice immediately.
People do crazy things when they are in love. It doesnt always end well just because you have a good feeling about her.
You would be right on side with Sam. It is really like an episode of family guy or something absurd like that.
There are so many things wrong with this situation. i supported this idea when it seemed harmless and fun. But, you cant get involved with a single mother on a whim like this. It may seem noble to save them from their troubles but it seems stupid to me.
My girlfriend told me she had a kid (turns out she was lying and having a good laugh behind the scenes) and I know how you feel. I am only 17 and she is 16 but I never thought I would leave her. In the 10 minutes she let me think she was a mother (which was actually quite possible for her, as she from japan and is only here for a year. She could easily have a kid back home.), I was planning how I would help her. I was thinking about how I needed to change to support her and her child.
I love her. I dont want to leave her over this.
I was actually planning on supporting my 16 year old girlfriend, who has another person's child, who lives in another country and is moving back this year. If that strikes you as a wrong move, then you need to reconsider your choice immediately.
People do crazy things when they are in love. It doesnt always end well just because you have a good feeling about her.
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At this point I'm not even sure if it's "love," rather some glint that somebody actually accepts you and you desperately don't want to lose it, and you're confusing it with "love."
get a grip dude. I mean literally. just crank your wiener until goop central and forget you actually considered this
get a grip dude. I mean literally. just crank your wiener until goop central and forget you actually considered this
I don't believe you.
Simply put.
If you're 6 months from joining the marines, you don't even have the option of moving, you're on call by your CO to report in for training and testing every month from the time you go through MEPS up until you're shipped to bootcamp. So maybe you're not lying about the girl, but it seems unlikely that you'd be this undecided about something like this.
However, as someone who married a girl he'd met online, I'd say I've got a little experience. Sure, she lived about 6 hours away, so I saw her once in a while, however, the facts are these.
I've been happily married for two years, have a child, and still have time to work towards my future. It isn't impossible, but admittedly not very likely.
Simply put.
If you're 6 months from joining the marines, you don't even have the option of moving, you're on call by your CO to report in for training and testing every month from the time you go through MEPS up until you're shipped to bootcamp. So maybe you're not lying about the girl, but it seems unlikely that you'd be this undecided about something like this.
However, as someone who married a girl he'd met online, I'd say I've got a little experience. Sure, she lived about 6 hours away, so I saw her once in a while, however, the facts are these.
I've been happily married for two years, have a child, and still have time to work towards my future. It isn't impossible, but admittedly not very likely.
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