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The One-Liners Thread



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Xickin

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As the title says, this is a thread where you can vent all of those awesome one liners or little dialogues you think of throughout the day everyday (You know you do it). Regardless of what it is, so long as it's cool, emotional, or meaningful (or maybe even just a passerby thought) it is welcome here!
Comment on the quote above you and give it a score out of 10. Give some constructive criticism if you want.

I'll go first:

"Most people care about what others think of them, I don't.
Because I have a job, one that needs to be done.
The world won't break itself."

FYI I TOTALLY care about what people think about me.
 

Grono

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Neat idea!

8/10, needed to be punnier :p

I recently started a D&D campaign with a group of friends from High School, and my character has become famous for making a new pun after every kill. One time I killed a guy point blank range with my Longbow, and my character said this, stone-faced and menacingly:

"I used to try to kill Dragonborn Rangers, but then I took an arrow to the knee." I was pretty satisfied with the outcome of that pun, but my DM gave me disadvantage for my next turn since he hated my puns so much xD
 

Chuman

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cocaine

they said i'd never grow a pair... that's why i bought a pear tree

why did the chicken cross the road? because it crossed him.

most people can finish a sentence, i am not most people.
 

Xickin

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1. Not sure what that is.
2. That's pretty funny
3. Now THAT is epic. Taking an old but well known joke and changing the wording around to make it sound dramatic and serious? Yes!
4. I kind of feel bad for a guy that can't finish a sen-
 

Recon

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don't dish it out if you can't take it

assumptions are humankind's worst mistake

fair enough
 

Grono

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10/10

Lich mein arse Captain Farce

First they're sour, then you taste blood

Well, fuck ME in the nards with a rubber chicken

Catchy toon, Looney goon

Oh, what the Bonkers!

Wow those were bad
 

Chuman

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dont you dare fall in love with me, hitler

when the going gets tough, i eat more ruffage

[anakin in high heels on a trampoline] what now obi bitch
 
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