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The New Fuzz - Jerome & Jesus



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Bear

Ouranophobic
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This fic is a spinoff of an MSN convo I had with my friend Jerome. We thought it would be pretty funny to make this into a fanfic, so here I am, and here it is. Enjoy. Also, a little precaution I need to take, before I begin.

*WARNING* Any relation to any storyline, life history, person, or twin is completely coincidental. Do not attempt any actions listed in this chapter, or any other throughout the series, unless told to do so by me, Jerome, or any of your superiors. Thank you.

This is dedicated to Jerome. xD

CHAPTER ONE!

Thwamp! Jesus struggled to get off the floor, using his bed to help him. He had been having really strange dreams lately, and every morning he would be woken up from falling on the hardwood floor. The dreams consisted of helicopters, speedboats, and replicas of himself. They seemed to mean something important, but he didn't know what. In time though, he was sure the answers would reveal themselves on their own.

His stomach grumbled angrily, so he decided to go eat something before he got ready for his big day. At about six o'clock he was planning on skating with a few friends to celebrate his birthday, which was tomorrow. He grabbed a couple waffles from the freezer and stuffed them into the toasted. After a minute or two, they popped up with a ding! and he slapped them on his plate. When he was finished, he washed his hands for exactly twenty seconds, dried them for exactly five, and retreated back to his room.

"What should I wear today? Hmm.. No. No. Maybe... nah. Yeah. Perfect for skating in this kind of weather." He pulled out a green shirt and dark blue pair of old navy jeans. The shirt read, 'Happiness is a cold glass pint'. Following those, he reached for a black belt, then opened his drawer for some socks and boxers. Once he had gathered everything he needed, he set off to the bathroom for a shower.

He was ready. The shower had only taken him about ten minutes, as it always did, and brushing his teeth took about three minutes. With all the time he saved, he thought it would be nice to use it for the internet before he left. So, he turned on the computer.

Not too many people were on MySpace or MSN messenger. The only one in particular that Jesus even talked to was Jerome. With no one else to converse with, he clicked his name and opened the window.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
my birthday is tomorrow. bow to me!

Jerome :
liar. so is mine.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
no really. it is. your birthday is seriously tomorrow?

Jerome :
srsly, it's tomorrow.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
SICK. we should go to the bar together and pick up some chicks.

Jerome :
Haha. I just noticed.. we both have mushrooms in our display pictures. xD

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
omfg... and our names both start with 'Je'. haha. we're twins! xD

Jerome :
Lmao. Oh yeah. well, I'm off. later.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
Later.

Jesus leaned back in his chair, amazed. He didn't know anyone with the same birthday as him. It was comforting, somehow. "Wow. That's pretty cool when I think about it. We're pretty much exactly the same age." His thoughts were quickly interupted by his mother. She bursted into his room without notice, and boldly commanded him to do something.

"Clean up your room before you leave, Jesus. We don't let you live here so you can make a mess." She seemed surprised at the fact that his room was already cleaned after taking a second look around. Jesus just smiled sarcastically. "Whatever. Have a good day. This room better not be a mess when I look in it again," she said, and with that, she walked off utterly annoyed. He couldn't help but to laugh.

~

The day had been pretty good so far. A good skate and nice dinner made it fun, but now that he was home and it was only eight, he didn't know what to do. Quickly running through a list of possible activities he could persue before going asleep, he came upon the same one he had that morning; internet. So, he hopped into his comfortable chair and booted up his PC.

Among all other things on his desktop was the MSN messenger icon; it stood out like a sore thumb now, and appealed to him more than it had ever before. At this, he clicked it, not satisfying his urge to, but intensifying it. The window popped up, he typed in his password, and then his was in. Immediately, Jerome said hello.

Jerome :
Whatup.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
Not much man. just got home. what about you?

Jerome :
same. hey, about earlier. I couldn't help but wonder who's older since we have the same birthday. what time were you born?

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
about 11:30 PM. you probably won.

Jerome :
... wow. that's freaky man. I was born at 11:37 PM.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
lmao. we just keep finding out stuff that's similar to the other.

Jerome :
Yeah. kind of cool. hey... I actually used to have a brother. a twin. he died in an accident, though.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
... wtf. stop now. you're joking with me aren't you?

Jerome :
No. I don't appreciate you saying that either.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
well the same thing happened to my twin. he died in a speedboat accident.

Jerome :
...

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
a helicopter lost control and flew into the speed boat me and my brother were in. it killed my parents and him. I was lost at sea for about a day until they rescued me.

Jerome :
dude... no flipping way.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
what?

Jerome :
the same thing happened to me.

Jesus { Since 1991 } :
wtf..

Jerome :
We should contact the fuzz..


-------------------

DUNDUNDUN. After about three comments, I'll post chapter two. chapter two will take place seven years in the future, and explain why the title is what it is. haha. This story seems incredibly random. It is, but there will be an actual comedy storyline taking place after this. Yeah. Hope you enjoyed this... get ready for the next chapter; it's 10 times better.
 

Bear

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Awesome. One comment. That's a new record for any fic I've ever had. =D Not really.. but, yeah. Comments, please. Critisism is fine, but I doubt I need it. The first chapter was meant to be written as it was. Jerome.. comment, nooblet.
 

Haku

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I think that it has the meaning of being a good story, I can't wait to read more in the future.
 

Agoraphobia

beautiful days
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Oh man. I didn't think you'd actually make a fic about this. XD

It's awesome so far, can't wait to read more. =P
 

Enchanted Rose

worst behaviour
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Jerome :
... wow. that's freaky man.
Never heard Jerome say "man" in an msn convo in my life. ;___;
Though you've got yourself spot on with all the "omfg".

Lol, it's a cute story.
 
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