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The Church of Secks



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Alaude Drenxta

\+The Devil's+/ .{Advocate}.
Joined
Apr 9, 2005
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7,306
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33
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My house?
BP gots commandments :p

1) All worshippers and supplicants of the church must pay homage to the five gods upon awaking first thing in the morning. If you don't, we'll know, we're gods. :/

2) Sacrifices are totally awesome, do those now again. Virgin sacrifices are much preffered. A sacrificial ritual goes as follows. Oh great and secksy *insert god's name here* please accept this badass virgin as a token of my worship, and may all your secks own.

3) If you're gonna kill, be sure to rape the dead body, cant let a good sex puppet go to waste. =D

4) Every year, the five greatest sluts of the church will receive secks with the gods, a great gift. So strive hard and secks your butt of.

5) Blaspheming against the gods is punishable with secks, bad secks, with Teh Munkeh Gawds monkey legions. Das right, raped by screeching monkeys.

6) Secks with two partners at once is allowed, but if you wish to have three or more at once, you must pray to the gods to guide your secks, elsewise it will suck, and no one wants bad secks :/

7) Secks on the forums is punishable with banishment. Munkeh gawds orders. :/

8) Forum rules do apply, dont think nobody will be monitoring this thread, so dont let it get out of hand. If the uber god mods close down mah church the heretic shall be smote. Or smoked, depends on my mood.

More commandments are tentative =D
 

Masquerade

Where's battlecry? :(
Joined
Sep 25, 2005
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7,845
Location
Here
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www.facebook.com
oooo...i got one!

Oh great and secksy TEH SECKS please accept this badass virgin as a token of my worship, and may all your secks own.
 

_Riku_

(^^)V
Joined
Oct 14, 2004
Messages
1,198
Age
33
Location
The Corrupted States of America
Website
www.freewebs.com
Breaking Point said:
BP gots commandments :p

1) All worshippers and supplicants of the church must pay homage to the five gods upon awaking first thing in the morning. If you don't, we'll know, we're gods. :/

2) Sacrifices are totally awesome, do those now again. Virgin sacrifices are much preffered. A sacrificial ritual goes as follows. Oh great and secksy *insert god's name here* please accept this badass virgin as a token of my worship, and may all your secks own.

3) If you're gonna kill, be sure to rape the dead body, cant let a good sex puppet go to waste. =D

4) Every year, the five greatest sluts of the church will receive secks with the gods, a great gift. So strive hard and secks your butt of.

5) Blaspheming against the gods is punishable with secks, bad secks, with Teh Munkeh Gawds monkey legions. Das right, raped by screeching monkeys.

6) Secks with two partners at once is allowed, but if you wish to have three or more at once, you must pray to the gods to guide your secks, elsewise it will suck, and no one wants bad secks :/

7) Secks on the forums is punishable with banishment. Munkeh gawds orders. :/

8) Forum rules do apply, dont think nobody will be monitoring this thread, so dont let it get out of hand. If the uber god mods close down mah church the heretic shall be smote. Or smoked, depends on my mood.

More commandments are tentative =D

I pledge to obey these commandments , oh great secks gawds.

BP, this is great! xD

Now, who wants a lapdance???


hahaha
 

Darckcloud

New member
Joined
Jun 7, 2005
Messages
974
Age
29
Location
In SK8ing paradise
Breaking Point said:
2) Sacrifices are totally awesome, do those now again. Virgin sacrifices are much preffered. A sacrificial ritual goes as follows. Oh great and secksy *insert god's name here* please accept this badass virgin as a token of my worship, and may all your secks own.


Yes.Finally a legal way to kill the virgins
 

Morpheaus

Time In Perspective
Joined
Oct 10, 2004
Messages
2,626
Age
35
Location
the Land of Nod
.:oh_your_hott:. said:
Haha no hes not popular at all. And yes he does eat alot, but thats ok!

Big boys need love too. :p

Breaking, I promise you as a good Papal authority to shatter all of these commandments with extreme secksual acts of perversion and debatchery.
 

Morpheaus

Time In Perspective
Joined
Oct 10, 2004
Messages
2,626
Age
35
Location
the Land of Nod
.:oh_your_hott:. said:
_riku_ Im allowed to love big boys. Although I must say im a bigger fan of the inshape ones. Morph come over there with your what? Finish your sentence foo

You know what...;)
 
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