Help/Support ► Struggling for social acceptance.

[Professor Ven]

Dawning Kensei's right, ask that girl out! She is DEFINTELY flirting with you! :thumbup:

Here's some stuff from my school to help ya out:

One of my friends was though of as gay by alot of the "idiot crowd" from 5th-8th Grade. Evidently, this year, me 'n my friend's Freshman year in High School, noone's made any kind of comment. Sounds like those idiots found something better to do. It's just chidlish to judge a book by it's cover.

My friends call me EMO and think it's arm slitting. It's NOT! OMG! Then I have to correct them, and tell them "EMO stands for EMOTIONAL! WEMO is WEAPON EMOTIONAL, and IS ARM SLITTING! GAH!" then they're all like WTF??!"

And one of my friends recently asked this girl out, who's a friend of mine, whom he dated the previous year, dumped cos he didn't see her often, and asked her out again over the phone.. Don't break up with someone just because you haven't seen them in awhile, that's stupid, and I've been hammering that into his brain ever since. And don't ask a girl out over the phone, show some courage, go get the kind of flowers she LOVES, a box of her FAVORITE CHOCOLATE, and ask her out the old fashioned way. If not, just ask her out casually, like during a conversation..

Examplev:

Boy and Girl walking somewhere..

B: So how was school?"
G:Good, you?"
B:Same."
B:Will you go out with me?" *drops on hands and knees*
G: Um sure ya, it's just.."
B: What?"
G: You're crushing my foot."
B: Sorry."

Pardons, had to do it ^^. Also, don't try this guys^, unless you like getting slapped in the face lmao.

PM if you want to be friends, or need any help,

Jub Jub376,

"The PyroEmo Maniac"

P.S.: Ask that girl out SERIOUSLY. She is most likely flirting with you, so put that brain to high gear, grow some courage, and ask her out!!!

 

[ViVi94]

Oh Oh! Perfect solution!!! Ask her out to the formal, and if she starts to say no, then hurry up and say, "I mean as friends" It works (unless its a Going out thing, then your screwed lol)

 

[Chris]

Alright, instead of begging for help with every one of my problems, I will focus on the girl one right now.

I have her screenname now, and I Imed her. We talked a couple of times, but I'm starting to realize more how she feels. I mean, I will say something, she will laugh or agree, but thats it. She never IMs me, I always Im her, and she just says "lol" "lol" "lol" "yea lol" "yea"...and i do anything to get her to talk. But I get the feeling I am a waste of her time and she is just a flirty person who doesnt want to bother with me. What makes me die inside is that theres kids on her myspace like "YO i saw ur pic and ur so hot so i thought i gota add you c/b k?" and she falls all over them. This honestly, honestly, makes me want to kill myself. Im not close enough to her to ask her about that stuff, and I am not friends with her friends to it's even harder.

I don't wana give up on her, but I need to know. DON'T tell me to just "ask her out" i need to progress slowly. How can I tell if she is just bad at making conversation, or if she doesn't want to talk to me?

In a way, I want her to know I like her. In a way that...she doesn't know that I KNOW she knows, but ...she knows that I do. If that makes any sense.

Give me some ways that I can make our relationship more intimate, so she can take me seriously and think of whether or not she likes me. I know she doesn't have a crush on anyone right now, and I'm mature enough to realize that its possible for people to fall in love with you if they neccesarily didn't initially. I'm so confused, and frustrated, and I'm running out of time.

I need help on what to do ...I want to get closer to her. If i get shot down, atleast I tried.

 

[CAB_IV]

lol, you fools are entirely to foolish!


look, you are a 13 year old. so is she probably. the unfortuneate thing is that there is nothing anyone can do.

allow me to further depress you by painting you a pictuer of reality (because its fun to see people try and deny it). The first thing you'll realize is that other people are mostly a waste of your time. when asking for help, they will give you stock answers (such as "just ask her out" as you have mentioned. the classic is "be yourself"). You will get the same answers from just about everyone, which are really not helpful, because they were either obvious from the start, or are so ridiculously vague that it means nothing.

these people either lack expierience, have never been turned down before, and/or lack something called "insight", or atleast the ability to have insight. they don't know real answers, they just know what they see on TV, or what people who watch TV say.

So where do you find people with insight? you don't. you get lucky if you have an insightful person such as myself, who might be able to help you, but then again, one major roadblock here is that i, and everyone else here, knows nothing of your friend, or you or anything. its a total waste of time because we are going on what you are saying, which is questionable as people tend to "sweep the ugly sides of things under the rug".

so now you need insightful people who know you and your classmates well, and so you ate totally lost now.

you best bet is to wander aimlessly loosely falling the stock answers that everyone gives without much thought to the problem, of which we don't even really know what it is.

the best i can say to you is wait until everyone is a bit more mature. what you suggest about her knowing stuff is entirely ridiculous. things don't EVER go down that way, so give that up. there is no covert way of doing things. really, (as much as i hate to give a stock answer, but i redeem myself by explaining why) your only option is to talk to her. not about dating, but just talk to her about stuff.

It seems like you are already doing this, and it also seems like she doesn't say anything specific, which could mean that shes just giving out empty answers. ( as in, she doesn't have anything to say or doesn't care, so she just gives that answer, since most girls avoid being directly mean). she could also be dumb, but i won't go questioning the intelligence of people i don't know.

if she seems itnerested in you ( not as in dating interested, just mildly interested) then you can try to escalate ever so slowly. patience and carefulness is key. avoid talking about personal problems, with either of you. that its a sure fire way to the banishment to the friend zone, as girls don't like to have their male freinds become boyfriends for a vareity of reasons. If you already share secrets, you probably lost her as a dating option.

Finally, you are 13. its not your time yet. You have just been struck early with infatuation. it will be gone soon enough. its like a very horrible and confusing virus. just let it wash out of your system without looking retarded.

 

[Tobuoi]

CAB_IV, reprimanding someone for their age and giving names to what they're feeling, such as "infatuation," is kind of condescending and I'm sure, not very helpful. But okay.

Anyways, from what you've said, FA, it seems to be pretty obvious that SOMETHING is going on with you and this girl. Whether or not it is any sort of romantic attraction, I don't know, but there's obviously some sort of attraction and trust among you two. Thus, leading me to my next point: do something about your feelings. Whether it be to just crank up the flirting or even ask her to this 8th Grade Formal thing, do something. What's the worst that will happen? She'll say no? Rejection isn't as bad as one would think, and it unfortunately happens several times to most people. Of course, you might be different. I don't know.

Also, I can't say for sure, but I deffinitely know that when I got to high school, everything was completely different. Mind you, life was never really terrible for me, but high school was just so much more enjoyable. I mean, EVERYONE was allowed to be themself. Everyone. Even the freaks who even creep ME out have friends, now. And you don't sound like one of those people, so I hope that everything turns out fine for you.

Remember, there's always the future, and whether we want it to or not, everything will change. Even us. :O Anyways, I hope that this either introduced you to new ideas or enforced what you've already established in some way.

 

[CAB_IV]

CAB_IV, reprimanding someone for their age and giving names to what they're feeling, such as "infatuation," is kind of condescending and I'm sure, not very helpful. But okay.

I'm not really reprimanding him for his age, although i do admit i've lost alot of faith in other people, and that i really think he should be solving this under his own power. Be honest, is there any real way to help? all we can do is give him the same pointers everyone else has. I apologize if i've upset to many people, but i've just found other people's advice totally ineffective most of the time unless you have special knowledge of the situation. I really don't think i'm that much better than anyone else, its just that everytime i come here, i see the same advice over and over and over again. surely someone has a different idea! That, and i suppose i've been really, REALLY highstrung lately. I gotta relax, i'm getting so iratated over stupid things. but thats another thread one of these days.

i'm not saying he is bad. I am saying that at this age, he has only been on this earth for so long, VERY FEW can get anything meaningful in relationships, if any at all, at his time.

I'm more suggesting that he learn a little bit more, and just wait. This is the best advice i've seen anywhere, and i know first hand. as you have said, things change in highschool, and it is in general a better place to try and go for these things, espescially since its near the end of the 8th grade school year, where things are so incredibly tense for everyone. I think now in general is just a really, REALLY bad time.

First of all, you can tell from the way he has typed his message that he is in deep as far as his feelings (I still call it an infatuation, unless this has been going on for quite sometime. I suppose our definitions are different, as i consider an infatuation any inital strong feelings for another, not necessarily a negative thing, although i often jokingly refer to it as a "bug"). this makes me worry that he may be rushing into things, which is a big no no. There is even more of an incentive to rush into a relationship since its the end of the school year, which maybe the only time he truely gets to talk to her outside of his IMs, which to me seem to be going absolutely nowhere.

If he rushes into things, it will get awkward. Its like trying to throw a paper plane as hard as you can: Its gonna crash and burn (yeah, i have a gas powered paper plane. not one of my better ideas...:toungesmile: ). again, this rolls back to life expierience. I really feel that people this age are just not really all that ready. its to socially awkward of an age group. He needs to give it a flick of his wrist to fly that plane of relationships, only he does not yet know how to hold the plane. again, not his fault, but he will learn. preferably withough blowing the plane up.

this goes back to the stock answers such as just talking to her and asking her if she wants to go do anything. As long as he isn't awkward about it, he may have a chance now for this 8th grade formal deal, but again, i still think he should only slowly build on her now, then take care of things later in highschool.


of course though, its all still up to our friend here, so who knows. My money is on waiting until september.

 

[Aly-chan]

so uh that's a big page. imma just go ahead and post what i was goin' to post before my internet connection ran out ~8D

h'okay

First off, get that icky feeling that you aren't liked by anyone. If people don't like you, so what? They can't hurt you unless you let them. Unless they actually punch and say 'I don't like you', I suggest you just ignore it. Or if it is to the point where you can't handle it, get the adults in the conversation. It's immature and selfish to not think of other people's feelings. I wouldn't consider it 'tattle telling'.

As for the gay insults. As long as you know whether you're gay or not, nothing really matters. There's nothing wrong with being gay. But if you like the opposite sex, you're no gay, I guess. You say like this girl. Find a way to communicate with her, rather than just sitting sadly at your computer table thinking you're just a waste of time. ;-; Because you aren't, and you know that.

Just take the time to think about about what to do. Don't jump in, you might scare her. Trust me it's happened to me before. I got really nervous when my best friend asked me out. If you really like her you would you try to get to know her, but not desperately. ;[

Otherwise with this Daniel thing, just keep her out. She's not helping one bit; if you can't trust, you probably won't have a strong bond or relationship. The relationship is bound to fail. ;~; But if you think you can deal with a whole bunch of drama and lies...do it! Believe yourself~!

Hey! I don't like it when people think lowly of the themselves when it comes to 'love'. You don't exactly know what she feels; to me you're just telling yourself that you're just a waste of time, but to her you may be the greatest thing! Just step up step by step, and try your best to get great results.

oh and the guy he's not ur best friend. he's a loser. :\

lol srsly. If he can't get a life rather than being such a jerk and a hypocrite he can go burn alone.

~8D Hope I helped! (lol i doubt it)

~Aly

 

[Chris]

Thanks everyone.


You may say this is all emo, whiney complaining, becuase I haven't given it time but I CAN'T STAND it.

Everything used to be so easy, and I can't stand the uncertainty. I want to give up. I can tell she doesn't like me, and that, won't change. It's not, don't try to correct me, not, worth trying. It's frustrating, and it's tearing me apart.

I don't know what to do. I told myself I wouldn't back out this time, but i don't know how long to continue without giving up.

Should I just tell her, knowing what she will say, but having it off my chest?
You don't know how annoying it is when i try to talk to her about the day and she literally doesnt type more than a word at a time. The second she sensed me trying to get closer, she totally blocked me out. =/

 

[CAB_IV]

Thanks everyone.


You may say this is all emo, whiney complaining, becuase I haven't given it time but I CAN'T STAND it.

Everything used to be so easy, and I can't stand the uncertainty. I want to give up. I can tell she doesn't like me, and that, won't change. It's not, don't try to correct me, not, worth trying. It's frustrating, and it's tearing me apart.

I don't know what to do. I told myself I wouldn't back out this time, but i don't know how long to continue without giving up.

Should I just tell her, knowing what she will say, but having it off my chest?
You don't know how annoying it is when i try to talk to her about the day and she literally doesnt type more than a word at a time. The second she sensed me trying to get closer, she totally blocked me out. =/

Congradulations, you are going to be just like me, so shoot yourself right now. hell, half the ways you describe are exactly as i would have a few years ago.

In all seriousness, i've been in exactly this situation. just don't ruin the freindship. As much as it hurts, if she is worth keeping around, don't ruin it with all the awkward "I like you" crap.

Seriously, focus your frustration on playing the waiting game. She'll be ready when she is. Chances are, you'll get over her before things get to out of hand.

with all the tearing though, you will grow, and this will be invaluable later in life. Remember to not feel to gloomy about all of this.

I know i say alot of negative things, but i'm going to tell you, this isn't as bad as you or I make it out to be. The fact is you probably learned something from all of this, and you probably have a greater understanding of people in general. You will benefit from this failure to launch.

and finally, like we've all been saying, highschool is coming. YOU HAVE TO BE ON THE BALL. don't let yourself loose anything you gain in freshmen year, because if you let those people and things go, it will be tough to catch up. Just wait until then, and you will be so happy that you did. Good things come to those who wait.

 

[Aly-chan]

Thanks everyone.


You may say this is all emo, whiney complaining, becuase I haven't given it time but I CAN'T STAND it.

Everything used to be so easy, and I can't stand the uncertainty. I want to give up. I can tell she doesn't like me, and that, won't change. It's not, don't try to correct me, not, worth trying. It's frustrating, and it's tearing me apart.

I don't know what to do. I told myself I wouldn't back out this time, but i don't know how long to continue without giving up.

Should I just tell her, knowing what she will say, but having it off my chest?
You don't know how annoying it is when i try to talk to her about the day and she literally doesnt type more than a word at a time. The second she sensed me trying to get closer, she totally blocked me out. =/

um uhhhh


Okay, if you feel this way, just tell her what you feel. Just try, rather than worrying about what might happen. You're afraid of rejection that might happen when you have no clue of how rejection feels. Trust me. You think you hurt now, but if she did reject you'll feel like total shit. Excuse my language. Prepare yourself before you tell otherwise you'll be going into an emotional breakdown. You don't want that to happen. >_>;

And I totally understand why she blocked you. You barely know her, and I guess she feels uncomfortable with you IMing her like that. Just tell her the truth about you, or start over. Ask to start over your friendship if you have to. I still stand strong with getting to know her in person. Do you know her favorite color?

I think you need a break before you talk to her again, and situate yourself so you don't feel as clueless and sad as you are now.

You need a break from drama. >:{

Oh and SMILE! Don't think the bad even though it may be true. Trust yourself. I'm 100% sure you'll get through this with happy results!

~Aly

 

[Chris]

^ By the way, she didn't block me on AIM. I meant, figuratively blocked me out. xD

But thanks for another opinion. I do know what rejection feels like...just not as deep into it as this. I'll tell you guys how it goes next week.

 

[Priss Princess Peckerpunch]

Okay, I'm just going give my opinion on each problem you have thus far stated. Please be advised that this is my opinion, and so please do not become upset. That would make me feel terrible! But I digress. Overall, I know EXACTLY what you are going threw. Heck, I've had those kinds of problems since I was in grade 4! But let me just go threw them.

For those who don't know, I am in 8th grade right now. But lately things have made me almost hate going to school and blame myself for what other people do. Firstly, in sixth and (half of) seventh grade, I was that cute kid that everyone liked and had a crush on. I don't know exactly what happened, but by now, I have a small group of friends and that is it. I don't think I changed at ALL...people say I did, but I know I didn't. Basically, I get harassed daily because Im skater, not "cool", and I am actually really smart. To the point where I almost pretend to be stupid to fit in with people. I am in mostly honors classes, but I didn't make honors science and I am almost afraid to answer questions without people laughing and saying "Wow...what a nerd".

I am going to state this right away. In my experience, grades 4-9 are the worst thing to go threw as a kid. Trust me, I know. I've almost finished grade 10 now, and I'm also 15 years old, just to relate. But of course, I haven't completely seen whats in store for me for the rest of High School, so I can't be %100 certain. But I'm getting a little off topic here, so let me continue. About the "Small group of friends" and onward thing, I sympathize with you. I know exactly what you mean. And unfortunately it isn't going to get better until you can move away from your friends and other kids. I know this may seem sad, but its the truth. After reading that all, I can see that your friends also treat you badly, just like the others do. I also have gone threw this. The best you can really do is just get away from them. But chances are that this will not happen until you go to high school. (Unless you are already in high school, and that the grading system is slightly different where you live.)

Secondly, a huge issue. People think I am gay. Not just cliche metrosexual gay (Which I am definitely not xD) people actually think I like men. Which I do not...at all. People honestly think I am going to come out of the closet, and I used to laugh about it and deny it but it has honestly become a huge problem. I know Fl would die of laughter with this, but people really do think it, and I don't act gay at all. That isn't a persuading lie, I mean it. D:
It may be because I haven't had a girlfriend in a long time, which leads to another problem...

Another thing I went threw, and to be honest, still do. For me it all started in Grade 4 when kids would always taunt me about being gay. (Among other things.) And it makes me feel sad to hear its happening to you. But again, I am going off topic. Yeah, that whole thing about kids saying you are gay is probably a bi product of the treatment you receive from kids. Trust me, it probably has nothing to do with you, or how you act. Its just because how kids think of you/treat you that they bring this up. And also, DO NOT REACT TO IT. That just fuels the fire. TRUST ME. Just reply with something that either changes the topic, or just plain ignore them. It WILL NOT help if you react to it, either by playing along, or reacting to it negatively.

Lack of confidence. There is a girl I have had a huge crush on this year, and I can clearly tell she is different. She talks to me, doesn't care that I'm not popular, and I can clearly tell she isn't shallow and would consider me a friend. But...she is indeed flirty, and I can't tell if she likes me or if she doesn't. It's not one of those longshot no hope things, I honestly have no idea if she DOES or DOESN'T like me back. I can't look her in the eyes, I talk really quietly, and I can't think of anything to say. In the middle of history, she would just turn around and look at me and I would feel all awkward and move around and not look her in the eyes. I want to ask her to the formal but have no idea how...it is in two months. On top of that, I find trouble making friends with girls now. I just can't open my mouth and say "hey" to a girl in the hallway that I've talked to only once before and would like to continue talking to.

Oh boy, I'm afraid I can't help you on the first one, mostly because its something I still lack. Though for me, its not with girls. Its just saying no to other people... But anyways, I know this kind of girl you are describing. And from my experience she's just a nice, flirty girl, who treats everyone nice. But she could also be hitting on you, but seeing as how you have stated that she acts like this to everyone I say she's just being nice and a bit of a flirt. And also, WHATEVER YOU DO, do not be meek, especially if you like said girl. If you have to, talk to her like a jokester. Trust me, this makes talking to people very easy, but this is just me. Also, this also makes people slightly stereotype you. Which way they stereotype you is up in the wind I'm afraid.

All the preps and "ghetto" people in my school hate me. They harass me, call me ugly, stupid, and every girl I have dated they say "Damn, what was she thinking?" I do nothing to deserve it, and I can't stand up for myself. Certain girls that I can't STAND I will talk back to them...like this one girl that looks like a dude, I will just be like, "Shut the f*ck up, start wearing womans clothes". But most of them I can't say anything. I can't like HIT them, so I just can't defend myself. With guys, I CAN hit them, but they are clearly bigger and stronger and I just take their shit.

Ah yes, the school a$$holes. I got this treatment all the time, and from people I considered friends to boot! My best advice to you is to plainly "NOT FEED THE FIRE." Whatever you do, do not give them material to work from. Sure, ignoring them DOES make it WORSE for a couple of months, but eventually they drop it and forget about you. This is ultimately a MUCH better choice then over reacting to them.

And another...my "Best" friend. I've known him since first grade...and he is just so uptight. It may be the way he was raised, but he is horrifically mean. I see him harass other people, with disabilites, mental and physical, and I laugh...hey, it isn't me doing it, I don't feel bad. But he makes fun of everyone, even his friends. I almost never tell him jokes because he will always stare blankly at me and say it isn't funny. He hates me for taking things so seriously, but he gets FIVE TIMES as mad. He punches me in the chin, I shove him to the ground jokingly, he freaks out, goes DBZ on me, and screams that I overreact too much. He and my friends beat the crap out of me on the bus and I say, "Aha...no..guys...seriously......stop..." and he mocks me and imitates me saying I'm a pansy. The second he sees I am mad at him he says I hold grudges too much, and starts acting nice to me. I eventually say, whatever, and forgive him. 7 years of that now. I don't literally have enough friends to just pull out a new best friend.

Yeah, this best friend you describe... NOT WORTH THE EFFORT. Especially if he treats you like this. I used to have a group of friends EXACTLY like this. They would treat me like crap most of the time, though once in a while they acted genuinely nice to me. I only stuck around them because they were the only friends I knew, and I didn't want to be lonely/did not want to lose them. I had said friends from grade 6 to grade 9. And trust me, IT IS NOT WORTH IT. I know this fact may be sad but... Its the truth. They obviously do not see you as a friend, or they just don't respect you. They are not worth your time and effort. Break all ties to them at once I say! Though this may be tough until you are in high school. But this is just from what I have experienced in my own life, so this may not be the best answer for you.

Sometimes, you don't realize how real the steriotypical, cliche bullying and unacceptance is until you are on the receiving end of it. I went up to a kid that I used to bully in sixth grade and just apologized to him. He was confused, but I didn't care. I get it now.

I completely agree with you. And to be honest, proud that you apologized to this kid. I have never talked to you before, but am still quite proud that you did this. In fact, you get a GOLD STAR, just for it. You're the first person I have met that has admitted this.

Lastly, one of my friends. I went out with a girl named Danielle, I may have told some of you. Break up, back together, love, hate, break up, back together, for 2 years. Eventually, I slapped myself in the face and faced reality...she was a deceitful whore and wasn't good enough for me. She lied and I could not trust her. She ended up moving when I still had mixed feelings. In the begining of this year she said all the times we were fighting she still loved me. I literally had a breakdown trying to convince myself it was another lie, and this was confirmed when I said I would "think about it" and she went out with one of her ex boyfriends the next day and still is going out with him. The mental anguish from finding the only person who still cared for me in that way backing down and hurting me even more was horrible. Now, Danielle has a friend named Victoria. I met her through Danielle, and we have been good friends since. She always acted kinda weird around me like I said about the girl I currently like, and last month her friend told me, "Hey, do you like Vicky? You seem like you do..."

I obviously am not stupid, and I don't act like I like her, so I got the point that she was asking her if I liked her because she liked me. She confirmed this. So now, I know the situation Victoria is in, and she isn't the type of person I really want to go out with at the moment. Should I just pretend I don't know? or let her down know and effect our friendship?

Oh. The big bonanza of the bunch. My best advice to you here is to just let her down easy. I know it may be tough, but just ignoring her is about the worst choice you can make, even though it is the easiest one to do. Yeah, just to let you know, relationships suck as a teenager. They truly do.

So, guess what? I asked my "best friend" why it's always me that is the butt of every joke. He says "because you don't react". If I DID react, they would call me a pansy, no fun, a wussbag, and would get pissed at me. I feel I am too weak to do anything back, and even though I can pounce on one of my friends and punch them in the arm, I can't find the strength to do something I REALLY want to do- Punch my "best friend" right in the face. But of course, I can't, because he is the hypocritical manipulative asshole.

Yeah, that manipulative asshole thing pretty much describes people like him. It may not describe him all that well, but from what I have gone threw, he is just not worth the effort.

I wana ask the girl I like to it, but I don't have really any means of communication other than person. I want to get to know her better but I don't have the courage/ can't think of a situation where it wouldn't seem weird to ask for her screenname. I don't know what to do, it's a simple question but I am afraid to ask her. Things would be so much easier if i talked to her out of school, and of course, even finding a way to that is becoming difficult for me.

Okay, now for the one that makes me feel bad... But to be honest with you... Do not get in a relationship. Its that simple. It may seem stupid, specially with how kids are these days. But the truth is that you are only 13, and in grade 8 to boot. I mean, you still have so much of your childhood ahead of you, and you shouldn't waste it by trying to grow up to fast. It also hurts, specially as a teenager. My best advice to you is to wait until your 16. Even better, wait till you've graduated. But again, this is just my view, and what I have decided to do in MY life. So if you do not agree with what I'm saying, don't take it to heart. This is juts my advice to you, and I am not in charge of your own life.

It may just be that she is a nice person, but she has NEVER been mad at me. She laughs at all the stupid things I say, and she has never actually been angry at me. Is this a sign that she likes me, or is she just the type of person that is ...nice?

I can't really tell if we are flirting or not. Like, in art, me and my friend were rolling a circular tape-thing back and forth, and then I got up for a minute. When I came back, I didn't know where it was. I asked her, and she smiled and said she didn't know. A minute later i saw it on her wrist. She put it down and got up for a minute and I took it from her.

We did that like ten times.

Is that just stupid stuff, or is she flirting with me?

That is for you to find out on your own. No one else can do more for you than to encourage you.

I have her screenname now, and I Imed her. We talked a couple of times, but I'm starting to realize more how she feels. I mean, I will say something, she will laugh or agree, but thats it. She never IMs me, I always Im her, and she just says "lol" "lol" "lol" "yea lol" "yea"...and i do anything to get her to talk. But I get the feeling I am a waste of her time and she is just a flirty person who doesnt want to bother with me. What makes me die inside is that theres kids on her myspace like "YO i saw ur pic and ur so hot so i thought i gota add you c/b k?" and she falls all over them. This honestly, honestly, makes me want to kill myself. Im not close enough to her to ask her about that stuff, and I am not friends with her friends to it's even harder.

I don't wana give up on her, but I need to know. DON'T tell me to just "ask her out" i need to progress slowly. How can I tell if she is just bad at making conversation, or if she doesn't want to talk to me?

Now from what I see, she's probably not very interested in the topic, not you as a person. Maybe try talking about things you both like, and not try to concentrate on things you just like, or things you just think she likes

Give me some ways that I can make our relationship more intimate, so she can take me seriously and think of whether or not she likes me. I know she doesn't have a crush on anyone right now, and I'm mature enough to realize that its possible for people to fall in love with you if they neccesarily didn't initially. I'm so confused, and frustrated, and I'm running out of time.

Well, nothing else to do than just ask her right? Simple as that.

You may say this is all emo, whiney complaining, becuase I haven't given it time but I CAN'T STAND it.

No... Just part of being a teenage really.

Should I just tell her, knowing what she will say, but having it off my chest?
You don't know how annoying it is when i try to talk to her about the day and she literally doesnt type more than a word at a time. The second she sensed me trying to get closer, she totally blocked me out. =/

Like I said, just ask her. And also, like I also said, just try talking about something that you both like.

Man, now I completely feel like an asshole. ^-^;;
But like I said, this is just from my own view, so do not let this interfere wiht your own life. I hope this helps, and if you want someone to talk to, just PM me or chat me up on IM or something, I won't bite! In fact, seeing as how similar our lives are, I am now going to call you little bro! Er... Just kidding XD ... Unless you don't mind xD.

Hope it all goes well with asking her and everything! ^_^

Edit
Holy! Wow, this is long... Sorry about that >,>

 

[Disluxia]

What is so amazing about social acceptance

Do you really want to learn how dumb the people you don't know are.

 

[Chris]

The advice as of late has been very helpful, I thank you for the efforts. I'm still just, confused. I guess it is worth the wait.

What is so amazing about social acceptance

Do you really want to learn how dumb the people you don't know are.

yea...let me just be a hermit my whole life. Good plan.