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Fanfiction ► School Day (Khi Style)



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Zabazu

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It was better than #2 and #3 and It certainly was good...muffin LMBO... XD
 

Annoyance

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Okay. I'm taking a break from editing now.
This means that Chap 5 SHOULD be up by tomorrow.
Stop complaining. You got 4 right here. FOUR! SHI! QUATRO! QUATRE! >.< Whatever four is in german! And some other languages. Shut up. VCH's typos hurt my head after a while... ._.
Edit: Since I was gone most of the day, I'm not sure. But soon. Just wait... x.x
Edit 2: Ai~...too many things coming up today. Tomorrow for sure people. I'm half way done anyway.
 
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VirusCoreHacker

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School Day (KHI Style)
Edited by: kairi_angel


Period 5 : Cat Fight In The Boys Bath Room



As Melon, Spastic, Redflame and BO all walked down the hallways, they began to have a pleasent conversation.

"So, who do you like, Flame?" asked Spastic.

"Well, Virus seems a little cute, I guess," she said as she blushed.

"Yuck! You like Hacker?" Spastic said.

"He seems too evil to me," said Melon, "what about you bo?" he asked.

"Well, Shady is pretty hot," Bo said blushing.

"So is that true?," asked a voice cooly from behind the group making them jump.

"Like, what the heck Hacker?! Stop sneaking up from behind!," Spastic hollered in shock and mumbled, "Not a freakin' ninja you know...."

But Virus just grinned back, and Bo, very annoyed at him yelled, "What do you want?!"

"You said you loved Shady, but the question is: Does he love you?" Virus said in a mysterious voice.

"Well of course he loves me!" said Bo.

Virus just smirked and said, "Then who's that girl he's flirting with?"

"What?!" Bo screamed, but as she turned around, Virus was gone.

"Bo, we're gonna be late!" Melon said.

Bo turned around and yelled back to the group, "Coming!"

As they walked down the halls, Bo was thinking to herself, "What did Virus mean by that?"

When the group got to the end of the hallway, Bo was in shock to find that Virus was saying the truth.

Shady was flirting with a sophmore which made Bo furious. Melon, Flame and Spaz all tried to hold her back.

"Bo, you're approaching this the wrong way! Just chill!" Melon struggled to say while holding her back.

At that moment, Bo had already broken free and ran over to Shady and started yelling, "Shady," she said, "Who's this?" pointing to the confused girl next to Shady. Bo was a pinch off from pulling his head off and using it as a weapon to get the girl.

"Oh, uh, hi Bo. This is just my friend, Megaflare," Shady replied nervously.

"But, Shady, I thought I was your gir--," Megaflare said before Shady nudged her arm and glared, "Ow!"

"Yeah, she's just my new friend that's helping me with my math homework," Shady said, "Well, look at the time! We better be going! Cya!" And Shady and Flare were gone around the corner.

Bo didn't believe a single word Shady said but didn't think much of it.

Later that day, Bo was walking down the hall with her friends when they heard a weird sound coming from the boys' bathroom. They walked over to it and peeked in to see Shady and Flare cuddling.

"Oh, hell no she isn't helping you with your homework!" Bo said furiously.

They rushed into the boys' bathroom, her friends desperatly trying to hold her back and prevent all hell from breaking loose, but these attemps failed, and Bo rushed up and threw Shady to the side and back-handed Flare.

"Who are you to be messing with my man?!" Bo demanded.

"YOUR man?! Shady and I are ENGAGED," Flare yelled.

Bo snapped, and she jumped at Flare, punching her and crowds of boys appeared outside yelling, "CAT FIGHT!"

Bo and Flare were at it, bitting eachother, tearing at eachother's hair, but the whole fight looked sexy in Shady's eyes. A few minutes later, Redflame, Melon, and Spastic were able to pull Bo out of the scramble.

"Go ahead and run away with those punk friends of yours! You coward!" yelled Flare.

"What did you say?!" Redflame yelled back.

The next moment, it was a cat brawl with Flare, Bo, Redflame and Spaz all at eachother. Shady was looking over the girls who were rolling all over the floor ripping eachother's clothes off. Shady's most deep fantasy has come true and decided to be a part of it by jumpin ginto the fight, but he wasn't alone. Melons also joined the fight and it turned into a riot.

One hour later, everybody was that was in the fight was in the Nurses Office.

Bo had a broken leg, Redflame had a huge bump on her head that looked like it was about to bleed along with the cut up there, too. Melon had a broken rib, and Flare had everything broken.

They all sighed and suddenly Bo looks out the door of the nurses office to see Shady walking down the hall with another girl. She once again got furious and limped out the nurses office after Shady in rage.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Editor's note: VCH seems to be self-proclaiming himself the ulti-man of the school. o.o *blinks* At least somebody has slf-esteem. << >>

OH and sorry about the late chapter. I was gone all day...chinese food and rented games and movies.. x.x'' Sorry. Can't resist teh sweet and sour chicken.
 

sephy 9 2 5

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VirusCoreHacker said:
"Oh, hell no she isn't helping you with your homework!" Bo said furiously.



^ My laugh of the day so far.

Um there was a few errors but overall it was very interesting and articulate.
 
C

Charlie

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Lol, I had a feeling that she would have to turn up in this school day at some point.

Memorable Quote:

"Oh, uh, hi Bo. This is just my friend, Megaflare," Shady replied nervously.

My only three words to you two: "THIS IS GENIUS"


*sits back in my chair roaring with laughter*

*tear* Ahh for the love of god PLEASE continue.
 

Annoyance

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o.o For some reason I can't see Flare with Shady...just can't...I see her slapping him though o.o Which is satisfyingly entertaining to me.
 

VirusCoreHacker

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RE: Chapter 5 : Edited Again By Zetsumi.

Period 5 : Catfight in the Boys Bathroom

"So, who do you like, Flame?"

Melon, Spastic, Redflame and Bo were engaged in a somewhat romantically-themed conversation as they strolled the halls, killing time between classes. Spastic had taken the oppertunity to probe Flame about her romantic interests.

"Well...Virus seems...a little cute, I guess" She said hesitantly, finishing quickly and fluching red, as if embarrased by the words that had escaped her mouth.

"You like Hacker? Yuck!" Spastic proclaimed, pretending to self-induce vomiting.

"Spastic!" Reprimanded Melon, scowling, before turning back to Flare: "Well, he seems too...evil to me, you know what I mean? What about you, Bo?"

"Well, I thought Shady was pretty hot..." she said, trailing off, before her face too began to flush with red.

"Is that so?" inquired a cool young voice from behind the group, causing them to flinch in surprise. Behind them stood Virus.

"Like, what the heck, Hacker! Stop sneaking up from behind!" screamed Spastic, rounding on Virus in rage. "You arn't a freaking Ninja, you know!"

Virus simply stared back at her with a bemused grin, causing her to rage silently. Bo, seeing her friend entering the 'danger zone', decided to head off this little accident before it erupted into soemthing major.

"What do you want?" she demanded, glaring Virus in the eye, but he simply smiled and winked.

"You said you loved Shady...but the question is: Does he love you?" Virus said in a mysterious voice, still grinning.

"Well...of course he loves me!" shouted Bo, all thoughts of defusing the situation torn to shreds at Virus' comment. Virus, however, just smirked and inquired:

"Then who's that girl he's flirting with?"

"What?" screamed Bo, raising a fist to put through Virus' face, only to realise he was gone. Melon grabbed her arm and dragged her back down the corridor.

"Bo, we're gonna be late!" Melon explained in a low, disinterested tone, as if there was definatly somewhere she would rather be.



As the quadruple made their way down the halls, Bo began mulling over what Virus had said. What had he meant, that girl Shady was flirting with? Was there any truth to Virus' accusations, or was he just stirring up trouble?

Unfortunatly for Bo, she was about to find the answers to her questions all too soon.

At the end of that very corridor, Shady was flirting with a young sophmore, apparently not realising that Bo was quickly firing back up with a rage to rival even that she held for Virus. Melon, Spastic, and Flame, all sensing the danger, grabbed her and tried to hold her back.

"Bo, you're approaching this the wrong way! Just chill!" Melon suggested, struggling to maintain her grip on both her friend and the doorknob that was offering leverage to counteract the headlong charge that Bo was no doubt straing to break into, with that young sophmore at it's end.

"Shady?" shouted Bo, startling both the young man and her companions, who were caught by surprise when she wrested free of their grip: "Who is this? she demanded, stomping foward to point an accusing finger at the confused young woman who stood beside Shady. Bo was about ten seconds away from tearing off his head and using it to beat the girl to death.

"Oh, uh, hi Bo. This is just my friend, Megaflare," Shady replied nervously, scratching the back of his head while thinking desperatly of how he would escape from the sticky bind he had landed right in the middle of.

"But, Shady, I thought I was your gi..." Megaflare said before Shady violently nudged her arm.

"Yeah, she's just my new friend that's helping me with my math homework..." Shady said, glancing at his wrist, which Bo noted lacked a watch, despite his acting as if he were glancing at one.

"Well, look at the time...we better be going...erm, seeya!" he shouted the final words from around the corner, beatign a hurried retreat whilst dragging Megaflare along behind him.

Bo didn't believe a single word Shady said, but decided to let it be...for now.

Later that day, Bo was walking down the hall with her friends when they heard a weird sound coming from the Boys' Bathroom. They cautiously peeked in to see Flare seated in Shady's lap, smiling broadly and whispering in his ear.

"Oh, Hell No, she isn't helping you with your homework!" Bo shouted, dashing into the Boys' Bathroom, her friends desperatly trying to hold her back and prevent all hell from breaking loose, to no avail.

An enraged Bo flung Shady easily to the side, letting him slide down the wall, semi-concious, before punting Flare across the room with a backhand.

"Who are you to be messing with my man?!" Bo demanded angrily, lining up for a kick whislt Flare was down.

"Your man? Shady and I are Engaged!" Flare yelled, causing Bo's foot to freeze inches from her face.

For a full minute, Bo didn't move. She didn't flinch, she didn't blink, she didn't breathe. It was only when Flare attempted to get up that Bo snapped out of her self-induced coma, throwing herself onto the young woman and wrestling with her out the door and into the hall.


"Catfight!" screamed one of the bystanders, as a crowd gathered around the two, Bo now attempting to bite off Flare's ear. Shady seemed to be both horrified and strangly satisfied with the somewhat sexy display of these two women attempting to tear one another to pieces. A full minute later, Bo's friends managed to extract her from the fray, panting and holding a lock of Flare's hair like a war trophy.

"Go ahead and run away with those punk friends of yours, you coward!" shouted Flare, obviously unaware that the danger was not yet past.

"What did you say?" Redflame yelled back, spinning around to rush at Flare, and within seconds, her, Spaz, Bo were all tearing into Flare together.

Shady was looking over the girls who were rolling all over the floor ripping each other's clothes off with a grim satisfaction, realising that he was at this moment living out one of his wildest fantasies. Deciding that he wasn't going to waste this oppertunity, he lept into the fray, accompanied by Melon.

One hour later, all six were seated in the school infirmary. Bo had a broken leg, Redflame eas nursing a huge bump on her head that looked like it was about to bleed. Melon sported a broken rib, and Flare had just about everything broken that it was possible to break.

"Maybe Shady wasn't worth all this..." Bo thought to herself, before spotting him strolling down the hall outside, hand in hand with another woman.

Ignoring the cast that encased her leg, she rose swiftly to her feet and limped out into the corridor.
 

Annoyance

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Yes...Zetsumi decided VCH was doing well with production and I didn't help it. So, he said "I'll re-write it to show you!" And this was what happened. x.x Yep yep.
 

Endgame

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kairi_angel said:
Yes...Zetsumi decided VCH was doing well with production and I didn't help it. So, he said "I'll re-write it to show you!" And this was what happened. x.x Yep yep.

I never said you didn't help it, KA. All I pointed out was that while you edited VCH's typos and errors, the story still remained as he had written it, and even with your edits, it seemed disjointed and sketchy. I also pointed out that as an RPer and Fanfiction authour myself, I had some understanding of how this could be rectified. I didn't in any way mean to imply that you were not adding any value to the production of the fanfiction, and I'm sorry if you took it that way.

Also, it takes me some time to rewrite each chapter, and as I dont doubt VCH will be continuing his fanfic, and I've promised to rewrite previous chapters, your efforts will no doubt remain indispensible to VCH.
 
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Annoyance

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I just wanted to keep his style of writing instead of making it my own. o.o' It just seems wrong for me to do that so yeah...
And what do you mean he wont be continuing? o.o
Edit: Nevermind x.x'''
 

Endgame

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kairi_angel said:
I just wanted to keep his style of writing instead of making it my own. o.o' It just seems wrong for me to do that so yeah...
And what do you mean he wont be continuing? o.o

When did I ever say he won't be continuing.

And besides, it's called a Beta. Ask around, you'll find out about it. Basically I've preserved his storyline while altering the writing style. If VCH dosn't want to use the rewrites, he has no obligation to.
 
K

kikyowhereareu

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I agree,KA,it's anyones discission.
And when is something going to happen to me,I'm in this too.*sob sob*
 

Annoyance

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Kikyo, I don't think he said you could...He could of been talking to somebody else.
And anyway. I'll probably edit the next chapter later and get it to VCH by tomorrow. I have a stomach ache and feel like playing Onimusha...x.x' Sooo...sorry ^^'
 
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