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Darkness Princess

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I decided to try my hand at writing poetry again, I haven't written in a while so forgive me if its not that good.

Hidden Dreams

Bittersweet dreams of heaven.
My world of hidden desires.
A haven where we're together.
We are gods, behind us our empire.

The world of twilight.
Time stands forever still.
No need for day nor night.
We change the seasons at will.

Everyday we lead another life.
To choose to wage a war against one another.
Conflicting sides, our relationship a double edged knife.
We lay locked in battle forever, victory belonging to neither side.

Immortality our given gift and curse.
Eternal love filled with eternal hate.
Do you remember who started the battle first?
A knife held hidden behind every embrace.

Bittersweet dreams of heaven.
Will my fragile world last forever?
Or will it shatter unto little pieces.
So like my fragile heart.
 

Haku

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Oh that was a really nice poem, I got a sense of deep emotion while reading this.
 

Blue

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This is really good,very well done indeed!

I like it a lot :D

Can't wait to see more poems
 

Aceflyheight

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Everyday we lead another life.
To choose to wage a war against one another.
Conflicting sides, our relationship a double edged knife.
We lay locked in battle forever, victory belonging to neither side.
Wow, this is really good. I thought you said that you haven't written in a while, I write all the time and I can't even write a poem like this. You really outdid yourself on this one, especially on the verse that I quoted. It's got to be my favorite verse in your entire poem, I guess that it's mainly probably because of the fact that it sounds so true.
 

Darkness Princess

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Oh yay! Thank you for the really nice comments everyone...
I wrote another poem which is cool. ^_^

Word Strings

They whisper….
They flutter around her.
Soft feathers are floating.
Incoherent words stringed together…
Shhh, it’s a secret.

The memories…
Pick the words up…
String them together to form a phrase.
Heartstrings hold them together.
Our secret.

Chained by them.
Slowly being weighed down.
The necklace of heartstring.
Tugging ever tighter…
Don’t stumble.

Head held high
She continues collecting
Pausing only briefly to catch the falling tears
Another secret is added to her collection
Trust to be broken.

Faith placed on cold fingertips.
Warmed by your trust
Afraid of it as well
Too much warmth burns her
Heartstrings tightening.

They tighten around her.
Take a deep breath
There are more secrets to be collected
More faith to be placed in her
Move on.

Look at her
Alive, laughing, smiling yet she's so cold.
Stubbornly walking on regardless.
The red heartstrings are choking her.
I wonder when she'll fall?
 

Blue

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This is also a great poem :D

Where do you get the ideas to write poems such as this one,btw?
 

Darkness Princess

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Well the one I just posted is really personal and their just my thoughts on some things.
The first poem and the rest of my poetry, I normally just write up a single line and the rest just seems to flow, I guess.
 
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Miss Murder

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Mmm ... very nice.
*huggles*

The one thing I can suggest is that you work on the 'beat' of your poems.
 

Darkness Princess

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Hmmm, okay...
Well the first one, I managed to come up with an entire song that sounds pretty good with it (got my friend to sing it).
The second has no beat at all...
The next ones I'll write, I'll try and improve the beat.
 

Haku

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That was yet another excellent display of your thoughts great job.
 
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Miss Murder

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Yes, I noticed that the first one had a very nice beat through its majority.

But to have every poem you write be excellent and reflect what great of a writer you are, then you should try to have most of your poems have a beat.
^.^

Well that's all the constructive criticism I have to give.

Keep it up, DP. =D
 
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