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Help/Support ► Prom.



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Nutari

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Is it as big of a deal as it is made out to be? Considering that my schedule opened up for Prom night, I already was asking a friend if she wanted to go. She jumped on that chance. So what am I to expect? I can slow dance, not the club dancing type, and I don't think she is either. We are both interested in eachother at that, so what shouldn't I do? Also this girl is really something, very nice, very innocent, how should I tread? Also if you know something blooms out of this, she lives a few towns over, any tips for long distance relationships?
 

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i havent been to prom yet (this is my first year)but just treat her nicely and all should go smoothly! As for the long distance reltionship, just make sure you keep in contact. the lost of contact as destroyed many reltionships.
 

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Is it as big of a deal as it is made out to be?

it's probably alright if you like the people you go to school with

as for the girl just treat her normally, you don't need to go out of your way to do anything differently
 

DiceKiller

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Can't give you advice on prom since I didn't go myself ^^;

Anyway, I wanna guess that the girl you like is shy. Not sure why, whenever I hear nice and innocent, I instantly think shy. I'm sure that's not always the case, so feel free to correct me. If she is shy, she is probably going going to look to you at how to tread herself. I know this is pretty cliché, but just be yourself. You might need to be a tad bit more outgoing than usual, or at least make sure that you aren't acting too reserved. If she see's you relaxed and outgoing, she will feel more comfortable and you two should be able to spend time together without a lot of awkwardness.

As for long distance relationships, I wouldn't recommend it if you can't make arrangements to meet her in person. Communication only over the internet only works for so long. I know me and my girlfriend plan meetings at places between where we live, since we are also in a bit of a long distance relationship, so there's a simple idea.
 

Nutari

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Can't give you advice on prom since I didn't go myself ^^;

Alright lol

Anyway, I wanna guess that the girl you like is shy. Not sure why, whenever I hear nice and innocent, I instantly think shy. I'm sure that's not always the case, so feel free to correct me. If she is shy, she is probably going going to look to you at how to tread herself. I know this is pretty cliché, but just be yourself. You might need to be a tad bit more outgoing than usual, or at least make sure that you aren't acting too reserved. If she see's you relaxed and outgoing, she will feel more comfortable and you two should be able to spend time together without a lot of awkwardness.

She was shy. She still is to an extent, but now she isn't so shy. But I was hanging out with my bestfriend and his girlfriend tonight and I mentioned the girls name and she was suddenly all "I hate her. I hate her dad, etc etc etc" I'm miffed because Amy can be a real bitch sometimes (I dated her, so I know) and well what ever. anyway, yeah I get what you mean. The one stumbling block that may be annoying after a while is that she thinks she is doing something wrong all the time. Of course that isn't the case, but she's just so reserved that she hasn't had a guy into her before. So I'll definately take your advice on that one.

As for long distance relationships, I wouldn't recommend it if you can't make arrangements to meet her in person. Communication only over the internet only works for so long. I know me and my girlfriend plan meetings at places between where we live, since we are also in a bit of a long distance relationship, so there's a simple idea.

Well I would wait a while, till more like summer. She lives a good half an hour or so away. Maybe a bit more, but we have skype and the phone (calling and texting) and her dad would be more than willing to cart her my way. As of now we can't afford a second car, let alone the gas it would take, so we would only see eachother so often. I can see it working, so I'm going to have to do some extensive planning if I indeed go for her. We have a brief history prior to this though. Last summer she asked me to join her and her family someplace and they embaraced the shit out of her. Her parents are divorced and all that, so there is some tension. I dismissed it but she got all flustered and thought I couldn't stand being around her. So we lost touch for a while. We started talking again about a month or so ago. So we shall see...
 

Sean

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Well at some schools prom has a bit of a heavy implication on how people act/feel. Last year I went to my senior prom with a friend. Literally just a friend, as a matter of fact, I wasn't interested in her at all. But we danced and talked and needless to say we ended up having sex by the end of the night/morning. That was the absolute last thing on my mind that day but things might turn out differently for you. I'm just saying you really don't know what to expect.

Although for your this girl you like, just get it out there. It's your last year in high school and as much as you think it wont happen, a good 99% of those people wont be there for you when you move on to college (assuming thats what you want to do). So yeah she might be shy, but just let her know that you have feeling for her that go beyond the lines of a friendship. Don't pressure her into making a decision right then and there. Give her time to think about it. Even if it's a couple days.

As far as long distance relationship, I've been in one since February of last year. And in that year, I've seen my girlfriend 3 times. Though I did stay over her house for a week over thanksgiving. But in your case it seems like it'd be a ton more viable for that to work. Skype, phonecalls and texts help a ton, but don't make it to where you're talking 24/7. It'll make you appreciate the time you get to talk to her and not take it for granted.
 

Nutari

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Well at some schools prom has a bit of a heavy implication on how people act/feel. Last year I went to my senior prom with a friend. Literally just a friend, as a matter of fact, I wasn't interested in her at all. But we danced and talked and needless to say we ended up having sex by the end of the night/morning. That was the absolute last thing on my mind that day but things might turn out differently for you. I'm just saying you really don't know what to expect.

Although for your this girl you like, just get it out there. It's your last year in high school and as much as you think it wont happen, a good 99% of those people wont be there for you when you move on to college (assuming thats what you want to do). So yeah she might be shy, but just let her know that you have feeling for her that go beyond the lines of a friendship. Don't pressure her into making a decision right then and there. Give her time to think about it. Even if it's a couple days.

As far as long distance relationship, I've been in one since February of last year. And in that year, I've seen my girlfriend 3 times. Though I did stay over her house for a week over thanksgiving. But in your case it seems like it'd be a ton more viable for that to work. Skype, phonecalls and texts help a ton, but don't make it to where you're talking 24/7. It'll make you appreciate the time you get to talk to her and not take it for granted.


For sure. I'm a junior so I'm this much closer to my last year as is. I don't plan on having sex with anybody at this point, just because of the repercussions. Yeah, I wanna cool talking to her so often, so I plan on taking it easy today, try to break her into a habit of texting or talking a bit after school. Is it okay to feel as if, for whatever reason I may lose interest, if it's over long distance? I've had three other girlfriends in my life and two of the three have been long distance and didn't last at all, because of talking constantly. I'll be extrememly aware of how much we talk. Texting is a blessing and a curse, obviously.
 

Sean

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Losing interest might happen. In fact, it's pretty probable if you both don't commit yourselves to the relationship. Yeah it's hard but if one person doesn't put in as much as the other, then it's pretty much doomed to fail. As far as talking, I'll use my relationship as an example. We talk for about 2 hours a day. From 8-10. It's more than enough and it keeps the conversation interesting since you have a ton more to talk about. But that's just me. The way you choose to handle is your choice.
 

Nutari

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Losing interest might happen. In fact, it's pretty probable if you both don't commit yourselves to the relationship. Yeah it's hard but if one person doesn't put in as much as the other, then it's pretty much doomed to fail. As far as talking, I'll use my relationship as an example. We talk for about 2 hours a day. From 8-10. It's more than enough and it keeps the conversation interesting since you have a ton more to talk about. But that's just me. The way you choose to handle is your choice.

Again I thank you for the advice. It'll help me a lot :D
 

Evello

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Sounds like your prom is pretty similar to mine last year. I asked a very nice, quieter girl who hadn't ever been on a date before. She wasn't into grinding or that sort of thing, and neither was I. I liked her, though I dunno if she initially had any particular feelings for me. We mostly just had fun, did a couple slow dances, and goofed off dancing however we felt like with a group of friends there. It doesn't have to be all serious and fancy if you don't want, and if you're with the right group it doesn't have to be overly sensual or intimate either. After prom I asked the girl out and we went on a few dates. If she hadn't gone to another country for half a year, we might have ended up together, but shit happened. No biggie.

Just have fun. Do what you want and what you both feel comfortable with. I'm sure you'll have a good time; I definitely did.
 
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I've only ever been to queer proms, and I'm sure they take a bit of a different turn from regular prom nights. Maybe not hugely. I wouldn't know. Anyway, I always found it was better to go with a group of friends than one date. Or a group of dates. I think groups are lovely, so I would wholeheartedly recommend trying not to be stuck with one person all night. Especially if it's your first official outing together with this girl (as a pseudo-couple, doing something pseudo-romantic). Other people make everything less awkward. Also, the prom itself may or may not be relatively to extremely boring (if it's anything like a homecoming dance, which is the only actual high school event I ever attended, once) so surround yourself with interesting people. And spike the punch or something. You only live once.

As for a long distance relationship, I've had a lot of those, which basically means they haven't worked out. I would reiterate what others have said in this thread; make sure you can actually meet up in person if at all possible. I do think that long distance can work if all parties are responsible and committed. Most importantly, actually talk with and listen to her before making any big moves. Because no matter how much effort you put into making things happen, if she's not completely interested it's very likely not going to work out.

And yeah, have fun~.
 

KeyofEvil'sBane

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A half hour away? You lucky bastard lol.

But seriously, if you are worried about distance, that distance is definitely doable. You guys are still in the same time zone, which can help immensely, and even drive out and spend weekends together. My girlfriend lives a few states over (her Oklahoma to my California) and we still make things work. The key is to just find things that you can share together, even with the distance. For example, a dinner date over Skype. And remember to try and schedule at least a little time together.

And if the prom advice isn't too late, try not to hype it up too much. Sometimes, all the preparation can make the event seem less spectacular than it could have been. Just relax, plan what is needed, and have fun.
 

Ehres

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Long-distance relationships can really suck some major ass after a while and after you are heavily emotionally invested in your partner. Orion and myself have been in a relationship for almost two years this August and we live in Australia and England respectively -- so, yes, it's a major haul. You are so, so lucky to live only 30 minutes from each other, so make the most of it: I'd give the world to be only half-an-hour away from Orion but unfortunately our paths don't cross so easily. It's all well and good waging how much you talk each day and how you talk, but the key to a good, fun, healthy, productive and stimulating relationship is common ground. If you can talk about anything at all and even have differences of opinion yet respect one another, that's a fantastic relationship; but if you need to constantly put forth effort to make things work you might as well quit because it shows there's something missing that the other person isn't willing to put in. Catch up on Skype and even surprise her here and there with a couple of phone calls; that's a lovely feeling. Write to her and send her things in the mail. Keeps her sweet and lets her know how much you care, value and think of her. If you lose interest -- which is normal -- just tell her to her face. She deserves that much (unless she's a colossal psychopath in which instance I would advise you to keep well away).
 

Nutari

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Well, she is really into me. Prom is in two weeks, she just bought her dress so the deal has been sealed. My mom is going to do her hair for her and stuff, she may even spend the night here, if her dad is okay with her going to post prom. I'll take the group advice, though I have to stay away from my best friend and his date, because for whatever reason, she feels like being a bitch to my date, behind her back respectively. My friends girl is always saying how she can't stand my date, that she talks too much, etc etc etc. My date on the other hand thinks my friend's girl is pretty cool. Dafuq?
 

KeyofEvil'sBane

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Well, she is really into me. Prom is in two weeks, she just bought her dress so the deal has been sealed. My mom is going to do her hair for her and stuff, she may even spend the night here, if her dad is okay with her going to post prom. I'll take the group advice, though I have to stay away from my best friend and his date, because for whatever reason, she feels like being a bitch to my date, behind her back respectively. My friends girl is always saying how she can't stand my date, that she talks too much, etc etc etc. My date on the other hand thinks my friend's girl is pretty cool. Dafuq?

In my experience, that's just how girl's sometimes act on their issues. I really hope I'm not offending anyone with this, but in my opinion, girls tend to talk and act behind each others' backs while guys are more up front and confront each other. Maybe talk to your friend and see if he a gather what his girlfriend's problem is. But congrats on the good results, and I hope things continue to go smoothly.
 
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Prom is in two weeks, she just bought her dress so the deal has been sealed.
Congratulations. I hope everything goes well~!

girls tend to talk and act behind each others' backs while guys are more up front and confront each other.
It really just depends on the person. Two of my best guy friends in high school would constantly refer to me as a middle person when they didn't want to confront each other. One of them in particular could say some pretty volatile things behind the other's back. And while we're up for generalizing...gay men. Ohhh gay men.
 

Nutari

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SUCCESS!!!!! Whoot! Despite the fact she was more nervous than an elephant near a mouse, slow dancing was glorious. We avoided grinding lol. I had potential to fall hardcore for her but she had a hard time looking at me because she felt bad about her achne, so I told her that I didn't even notice it, that it didn't bother me. That helped a bit. Didn't kiss her because she wants to take things slow, which is great actually. Asked her out and I will remember that for a really long time. I asked her if she would be my girlfriend and she said, "And the answer is Y-E-N!" me: "Yen? You said yen" her "I meant yes :3"
 

ROXAS_32

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To be honest going to proms is not that big of a deal , at least to me, but then again I've been to 3 senior proms and 2 juniors.
 

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Sorry I know this isnt my thread but I just want some opinions.

I have three girls in mind to ask to Prom, one who I dont really talk to but I kinda know her, a friend, and a girl who I havent really talked to but have a small crush on so I want to get to know them better by taking them to Prom. All in different classes which is how I know them.

Girl 1- I asked my friend if she knew if they were going to Prom and she ended up giving me a perfect way to ask her and all that jazz but she also told the girl I was gonna ask her. At the last minute the girl ended up saying she was going with her friends as a group but later told her that she isnt sure about going with me since we havent really talked much. Anyone think I should try talking to her for the next couple classes and then ask her or just drop her and I just want to go as friends with her since she seems nice from what I know.

Girl 2- A good friend that I knew since last school year but started to really talk and become friends this school year. Shes nice and everything and is a Junior (im a Senior) so shes most likely not going since I think no ones asked her. My friends think I should just ask her since im having trouble finding someone to take.

Girl 3- A girl that im kinda interested in but I havent really held a good conversation to get to know them so asking them is a little weird especially since I dont know if they are going with someone or if Prom is their kind of thing. I can easily start talking to her and if it works out thats good but im going to be trying to impress her the whole time which will screw me over if she ends up wanting to just be friends. So should I go all out and try to impress her and maybe have a memorable/bad Prom or should I work on this crush outside of Prom?

I know im making a big deal of it this but im kinda stuck and I could use someone elses opinion.

SUCCESS!!!!! Whoot! Despite the fact she was more nervous than an elephant near a mouse, slow dancing was glorious. We avoided grinding lol. I had potential to fall hardcore for her but she had a hard time looking at me because she felt bad about her achne, so I told her that I didn't even notice it, that it didn't bother me. That helped a bit. Didn't kiss her because she wants to take things slow, which is great actually. Asked her out and I will remember that for a really long time. I asked her if she would be my girlfriend and she said, "And the answer is Y-E-N!" me: "Yen? You said yen" her "I meant yes :3"

Lol congrats man and good luck.
 

Nutari

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thanks Zero. Okay and my vote is 2. I have been talking to my girlfriend for about a month and a half before I asked her out, we knew eachother from before, but well she was mega shy then. It was easier for her to interact with me when her friends were around. She was still nervous anyway but go with girl 2 because you already know her and there might be something there for you to kindle vs. the two other girls you hardly know
 
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