Parody Script- Acelegin's Birthday Party



New member
Nov 14, 2009
In celebration of my 21st birthday, I decided to throw a massive party and invite a bunch of people who don't exist.
And this script explains what happened. Enjoy.

Sora; We finally did it. We caught up to that fucking dog.
Donald; So what does the note say?
Sora; It's an invitation to Acelegin's 21st birthday party.
Donald; Oh my God! Acelegin's turning 21! Do you have any idea what this means?
Sora; That he's somehow managed to go 21 years without losing his V-card?
Donald; Well, yes, but that's not what I was getting at.
Goofy; What is it?
Donald; What do most people do when they turn 21?
Sora; I'm not following you.
Donald; Booze-
Donald; Good, let's go.
Goofy; Gwarsh, this'll be fun.
meanwhile, at the castle that never was
Zexion; Hey guys!
Xigbar; What is it Tiny?
Marluxia; Did the newest issue of Smooth magazine come out early?
Zexion; Even better.
Marluxia; What could possibly be better than Smooth Magazine?
Zexion; Acelegin just mailed us all invitations to his 21st birthday party!
Marluxia; I don't see how that's-
Zexion; Booze.
Larxene; Wait, did we all get invites?
Zexion; Almost all of us. Sa'i'x is still under house arrest so he can't come.
Sa'i'x; Damn it!
Zexion; And we actually received a letter specifically saying that Xaldin isn't allowed within 500 feet of the party.
Xaldin; What? No fair!
Roxas; I don't get it, why can't he come?
Axel; Because he's the world's most annoying cockblock.
Vexen; Seriously, have you ever been to a party with this guy?
Xemnas; It's fucking terrible.
Demyx; Almost as bad as that time Slender Man was in the organization.
Demyx; Oh my God, I just had a rough day at work.
Vexen; God fucking damn it, Demyx! You just ruined my fanfic! It was about Grawp, eating Harry Potter.
Demyx; If you think that's bad, wait 'til you hear about my day.
Vexen; Your day? What happened during your day?
Demyx; Well, y'see, this Red Nocturn flies in, from the bathroom, I don't know how it got in there, and- wait, what the hell is wrong with the camera?
Vexen; What the hell is this?
Demyx; God damn it!
Vexen; Slender Man!
Demyx; We told you that this was our alotted time that we would be filming each week, and all you had to do was stay in your room-
Vexen; Go back to your closet!
Demyx; You can come out and do whatever creepy thing you-
Vexen; Are you an idiot?
Xemnas; Okay, guys, calm down. Okay, now here's where we were in the script.
Vexen; Well, it doesn't matter now, I was in character.
Xemnas; I know.
Vexen; It takes me like, two hours to get into character.
Xemnas; I know.
Vexen; In the mirror.
Xemnas; I know. Let's just try this. I feel bad. Okay, we were doing the scene with the megalixers, okay? Oh, come on, Vexen, you don't need to act like that.
Vexen; Well don't you have keys for the closet? Can't you just lock him in there?
Xemnas; closet- He has a room, he is an equal roommate here-
Vexen; We gave him a room?
Xemnas; Okay, just calm down. He gets the rent paid, on time, every month. Okay, we're doing the seen with the megalixer. Demyx talks about the megalixer, and the woman, and that's when- God damn it, he's right behind us, isn't he?
Vexen; God damn it!
Xemnas; Stop it! Stop it!
Vexen; Why are you just standing there?
Demyx; He just teleports in, every time we hang out.
Vexen; What are you watching!?
Xemnas; I just defended you. I just stuck up for you, and this is what happens.
Vexen; What is so fucking interesting that you've just gotta stand there, and watch us? Man, you're annoying!
end flashback
Larxene; So that means that every one except Sa'i'x and Xaldin are going, right?
Sa'i'x; Please don't leave me alone with him!
Xemnas; I guess I'll stay behind too. Bad things tend to happen whenever Acelegin and I hang out.
Larxene; What kind of bad things?
Xemnas; Bad. Things.
meanwhile, in New York
Lenny; Master! I have some mail for you and your friends.
Johny; Who told you that these guys are my friends?
Lenny; Are you gonna read the mail or not?
Johny; Of course not. That's why I have you here. To read my mail. And cook my food. And wash my boxers. Anyway, if any of that is from Tinker Bell, kindly write him back saying to go fuck himself.
Lenny; It looks like you've all been invited to Acelegins 21st birthday party.
Johny; Who cares.
Frank; But if he is 21 now, then there might be booze.
Lenny; But you're only 16, you can't be drinking.
Johny; Shut the fuck up Lenny. Come on guys, let's do this shit!
Natan; Hold on, I need to pack some clothes.
Johny; Why?
Shania; These invitations say that he lives in Southern California.
Johny; Oh boy! Road trip!
meanwhile, somewhere
Killer; Huh, I wonder where this letter came from?
Lady; ...
Killer; It looks like an invitation to Acelegin's birthday.
Lady; ...
Killer; I kinda wanna go, but it might be a trap set up by the police.
Lady; ...
Killer; What do you think I should do?
Lady; ...
Killer; You don't talk much, do you?
Lady; ...
Killer; So, do you wanna go to this thing or what?
Lady; ...
Killer; I take your silence as a yes. Beside's, if he's turning 21, then they'll probably be booze.
Killer; ...Man, that joke got old fast.
meanwhile, at a tree
Fang; Hey Ace, guess what!
Ace; No.
Fang; Oh, come on!
Ace; I'm not guessing.
Fang; But-
Sato; Just, stop trying. He's more stubborn than you realize.
Fang; We were invited to Acelegin's 21st birthday party!
Tikal; Really?
Fang; Yeah!
Ace; All of us?
Fang; Yep!
Ace; Even Mecros?
Fang; Especially Mecros!
Sato; I thought he lost all his memories.
Tikal; Speaking of which, when is Acelegin gonna continue that story ark?
Ace; Tikal, that's one of those questions that you just don't ask.
Mecros; If he's 21, then does that mean there's gonna be booze?
Ace; DON'T!
Sato; Okay.
meanwhile, at Eggman's base
Eggman; Hey, we've all been invited to Acelegin's 21st birthday party!
Malice; Interesting.
Naome; Wait a minute, I have some questions. Malice, weren't you killed?
Malice; I believe so.
Naome; And I was sealed inside of the Chaos Emerelds, correct?
Eggman; Correct.
Naome; So then why are we here? And even if that did make sense, why the fuck are we hanging out with Eggman.
Malice; I don't know.
Eggman; More importantly, this is his 21st birthday, which means that there's gonna be booze!
Naome; That's cool.
Malice; Yes, it's certainly something to look forward to.
meanwhile, in Rosswood
Sora; I think we took a wrong turn somewhere.
Goofy; I don't remember seeing these woods on the map.
Johny; Hey, what's up?
Sora; Who are you?
Johny; I'm Johny Garland, an attractive 16-year-old private detective with great hair and a lightsaber.
Shania; Do you always introduce yourself like that?
Johny; yes.
Sora; can we see your lightsaber?
Johny; sure. (summons lightsaber)
Sora; Cool! Check this out! (summons lightsaber keyblade).
Johny; Nice! We should hang out!
Sato; Hey, are you guys going to Acelegin's party?
Sora; yeah. You going.
Sato; Yes, but we seem to be having some trouble getting there.
Ace; I told you we should've used the Chaos Emeralds.
Sato; You think that the Chaos Emeralds solve everything.
Ace; That's because they do! They stop time for crying out loud!
Slender Man; Excuse me.
Johny; Oh God!
Sora; What is that thing?
Sato; Kill it with fire!
Slender Man; I was just wondering if you could tell me how to get to Acelegin's party.
Ace; He invited you?
Slender Man; Yes.
Natan; Is it me, or does this script just keep making less and less sense.
Slender Man; Hey Natan! How's it going?
Shania; Wait, you two know eachother?
Natan; Unfortunately.
Slender Man; We were college roommates.
Natan; We used to get crunk and pick up chicks, as the saying goes.
Fang; Ace, do you think I'll have nightmares because of this guy?
Ace; Do you remember how I was scared of you the first time we met?
Fand; Yes.
Ace; I was mentally scarred from a werewolf movie when I was ten. I still haven't quite recovered.
Slender Man; I've actually been trying to meet Acelegin for several years now, But I keep getting side trackeed by the cast of "Marble Hornets".
meanwhile, in Arizona
Eggman; I think we've been making good time. Let's stay in this hotel for tonight. I'll go check in.
Malice; Okay.
Naome; Later
later on, at the checkout desk
Eggman; Hey what's up?
Luxord; Not much. Just renting some rooms for my associates and I.
Eggman; Cool. I'm on my way to a party.
Luxord; Acelegin's party?
Eggman; Yeah, how'd you know?
Luxord; Goin' there myself.
Eggman; Nice.
Luxord; You play poker?
Eggman; I know a guy who does.
Luxord; He goin' to the party?
Eggman; Maybe.
Luxord; I hope so. I haven't played since that incident in Vegas.
Eggman;I should warn you, he hardly ever loses.
Luxord; Good. A challenge.
meanwhile, in one of the hotel rooms
Killer; damn it, I can't sleep with all that noise next door. HEY! KEEP IT DOWN OVER THERE!
Zexion; Fuck you, man! We'll be as loud as we want!
Larxene; Yeah! Harder!
Zexion; Yeah baby! You like that, don't you!
Killer; I fucking hate shipping.
meanwhile, in the duel monster's spirit world
Johny; How the hell did we end up here? This doesn't make sense.
Ace; I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Chaos fucking Emeralds.
Sato; Stop reminding me.
Sora; Hey, I think I see the Dark Magician! Hey, Dark Magician! Can you help us out?
Dark Magician; Sure, what do you need?
Sora; Can you help us get to Acelegin's party?
Dark Magician; Sure, I was actually about to head there myself.
Shania; For the love of God, how many fictional characters did he invite?
Dark Magician;I activate the Trap card, "Interdimensional Matter Transport".
Johny; What does that do?
Dark Magician; It transports Matter. Interdimensionally.
scenery change
Dark Magician; And we're here.
meanwhile, outside the club
Eggman; We've finally arrived.
Malice; The trip would have been a lot more enjoyable if we hadn't picked up all those hitch hikers.
Xigbar; Yeah, sorry about that. I'm not sure why, but Xemnas seems to have closed off the dark corridors.
Eggman; The Egg Carrier seats 50, so stop complaining.
Naome; How can I do anything but complain with that annoying fan-pairing fornicating loudly down the hall?
Killer; Ugh, tell me about it.
Malice; Why did you need a ride?
Killer; The smart ass We were riding with earlier made a joke about my relationship with Lady. So I killed him. It was then that realized I had no idea how to work a stick shift, so my only other option was to ask you furries for help.
Naome; We are not furries!
Killer; Looked in a mirror lately?
Acelegin; Welcome, everyone, to my awesome party of awesomeness! Before this party get's started, I have just one thing to say to you all: Raise the fucking roof, bitches!
Ace; So, you're a serial killer, huh?
Killer; Yep.
Ace; What's your serial?
Killer; Fan pairings.
Ace; Well, it's a good thing I'm single.
Fang; But what about Tikal?
Ace; What about her?
Fang; Aren't you two a thing?
Ace; Do you enjoy having a head?
Fang; Yes.
Ace; Then I suggest that you never say anything that stupid again.
Xion; So did you get Acelegin anything?
Axel; I got him a cardboard cutout of Mathaxsan!
Vexen; Did you take that from Xemnas's room?
Axel; Maybe.
Demyx; I got him his own sitar!
Vexen; I got him a lazer death ray!
Lexaeus; I got him a sack of weed.
Zexion; I don't think he smokes weed.
Lexaeus; Then how the hell did he come up with this parody script?
Zexion; I don't know man. I just don't know.
Dark Magician Girl; Hey Dark Magician! I'm totally wasted right now! Wanna make out?
Dark Magician; Best. Party. Ever.
Killer; Fucking shipping!
C-Rad; Sweet party, Bro. You should turn 21 more often.
Mathaxsan; I don't think that's possible.
Acelegin; Anything is possible when you're Acelegin!
Mathaxsan; I think you should lay off the vodka.
Acelegin; You are the one who should lay off the vodka!
TKAllTheWay; This is fucking hilarious
Acelegin; Shut up, TK.
Slender Man; Hey guys! Hey guys!
Acelegin; Hey, Slendy! Wazzup!?
Slender Man; Can I be in the Parody Script?
Mathaxsan; Wait, have I seen you before?
Slender Man; I do not belive so.
Mathaxsan; I think you used to stalk me when I was a little kid.
Slender Man; I believe you are mistaken.
Acelegin; Go make me a sandwich.
Mathaxsan; I'm not making you a sandwich.
Slender Man; I would like to be in the Parody Script.
Acelegin; Okay, but you have to do something for me first.
Slender Man; Would you like me to make you a sandwich?
Acelegin; No, that's Mathaxsan's job.
Mathaxsan; No it's not!
Acelegin; No, Slendy, there is somethimg far more important that I need you to do for me.
I've been using the word "meanwhile" a lot
Sora; And he was all like "Kingdom Hearts, fill me with the power of darkness" And then I was like "No way, Kingdom Hearts is light", and then he died.
Johny; Wow, that's a cool story. but there's a lot of plot holes in it.
Sora; I'm sure the next game will make more sense.
Shania; Well, I think it's pretty cool that Acelegin finally reached the end of the first script.
Natan; Which is a lot more than we can say for the Shadow Hearts Parody Script. Seriously, It's like he just doesn't care anymore.
Sora; It could be worse. You could be watching... A Mermaid Melody fandub!
Frank; Is there anyone Acelegin hasn't ripped off from?
Sora; I don't know.
Naome; Hey sis, how's it goin'.
Tikal; Naome? Weren't you-?
Naome; Sealed inside the Chaos Emeralds? Yeah, I'm not completely sure what happened with that.
Malice; Hey, what are you guys talking about?
Tikal; Since when do you hang out with Malice?
Naome; I Don't know the answer to that one either.
Sato; Malice.
Malice; Oh, hey Sato. How's things?
Sato; Why aren't you in hell?
Malice; Because Acelegin doesn't give a crap about continuity.
Sato; I see.
Malice; You aren't still sore about the whole "killing you the guise of your brother" thing, are you?
Sato; You have a five second head start before I start chasing you with my Hellsaber.
somewhere else
Zexion; Wow, Lexaeus was right, Tequila IS awesome!
Larxene; I don't think you should be drinking so much.
Zexion; I love you so much right now.
Slender Man; No wifing in the club. Give me 20 dollars.
Zexion; What?
Slender Man; Acelegin says I can be in the script if I stop people from wifing in the club. Now give me 20 dollars.
Zexion; What the hell are dollars?
Slender Man; a unit of currency used in America.
Zexion; All I have is munny. Do you know the the conversion rate is?
Slender Man; What the hell is munny?
Roxas; Hey, is the birthday boy here? I wanna give him a present. From Germany.
C-Rad; He's passed out in the corner. I think he drank too much.
Mathaxsan; Wait a minute, isn't Acelegin a diabetic?
The next day
Random Preacher; We are gathered here today to bid our farewells to (Actual name censored), also known as Acelegin, who regrettably passed away last night, do to an alchohol overdose. I would read you all his will, but he was too lazy to write one, so instead we will sell all his shit on ebay.
C-Rad; I can't belive he's really gone.
TKAllTheWay; I'm gonna miss him.
C-Rad; As a memorial to (actual name censored), shut up TK.
Mathaxsan; This is terrible. (actual name censored)'s fan's will be devastated when they hear about this.
TKAllTheWay; All three of them.
C-Rad; Shut up TK.
Mathaxsan; It looks like there's no other choice. I'll have to write the script for him.
Acelegin; (sit's up in coffin) Fuck no!!
C-rad; Holy Shit!
TKAllTheWay; You're alive!?
Mathaxsan; No way!
Acelegin; There's no way in hell I'm letting you write the Parody Script! Now get out my house!
Mathaxsan; But we're not in your house.
Acelegin; Every house is my house!
Mathaxsan; Are still intoxicated?
Acelegin; You are the one who is intoxicated!

Hope you enjoy enjoy this stupid, nonsense. comment if you enjoyed, and troll me if you didn't.

Dark Drive

New member
Feb 10, 2012
  • Kingdom Hearts HD 1.5 ReMIX
  • Unicornis Union
  • Kingdom Hearts HD 2.5 ReMIX
  • Jiminy's Journal
  • Kingdom Hearts Unchained χ
  • Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance
Dude, that was epic.

Happy Birthday.

Yeah, i'm a newbie, but is it illegal to say Happy Birthday?

I thought not. Happy B-day Dude, hope you had a awesome day.