Now That a KH Themed Cafe is Real...



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Caxinuld

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I can now bring out an AU inspired by this fanart.


Bonus Trivia
  • There's no hidden meaning when the org members are consumed by their own element, it's just a cooler way of having the bodies disappear.
  • Karaoke is a Japanese term that translates to Empty Orchestra.
  • Xemnas is the laziest organization member, but Saix won't allow anyone to call him out on it so they just pick on Demyx.
  • Posters advertising the maid cafe have all 13 members of the organisation. Xion was nonexistent when they were made and while Xemnas is wearing the maid uniform in the posters, he specifically requested his real face be kept hidden, so the face you would see on the posters does not resemble the organisation leader at all.

Organisation XIII runs the KH Universe's most successful Maid Cafe, but Xemnas is planning to farm the hearts of all his customers to build Kingdom Hearts and boost his Nobody army.

The maid uniforms are magically enhanced so the wearers are protected from darkness whenever they use the corridors and when their work is finished for the day, they return to The Basement That Never Was, their headquarters located underneath the cafe. Xemnas has nicknamed some of the locations based on who spends the most time around them.

Xemnas is the owner & doesn't do anything but sit in his Lounge (Malice's Retreat), flaunting his leopard print robed body. In summer, he discards the robe, walking around in KH-themed underwear. He knows that Marluxia & Larxene want to betray him & take his fortune, but he doesn’t care.

Xigbar spends most of the day standing in front of the Entrance (Demon's Chamber). He also walks around Hollow Bastion/Radiant Garden & advertises the place to random people. Xigbar frequently teleports to Twilight Town and the other worlds to try and get more customers, even though they may not have the means to travel to another world. He uses social media to post memes & pranks the customers with his teleportation, He posts all kinds of snarky comments about the staff and paints Larxene as a pretty girl with a pure heart. If you pay double the price of the most expensive item on the menu, he celebrates your elevation to VIP status with trumpet fanfare. At least once a week, he will get another organization member to cover his shift while he goes off to the arcade to play light gun games. He gets a kick out of watching Saix enter his berserker rage.

Xaldin hates his job & also rejects the concept of love harshly, something that many customers don't like and often never return. People think he’s a tsundere. He's often the last one to leave because he's busy sweeping up the place and someone has to be around to make sure Demyx does his job.

Vexen is the head chef in charge of the Kitchen (Arctic Laboratory) and one of the reasons the cafe's food is so popular, but he is constantly roasted by the other members. He travels to Disney worlds to sample the local cuisine for inspiration. His Paopu Fruit ice cream proved to be surprisingly popular despite the fact that it is the most expensive ice cream on the menu.

Lexaeus, along with several other members, serve as the waiters of the cafe. In the popularity contests, Nobody No.5 is ranked at #3. Many fans said his muscular physique & kindness are the reasons they love him. He offers books & puzzles to anyone waiting for food or tables.

Zexion is the sous chef & the most respectful towards Vexen. He prefers to stay in the background and let the other members draw the customers' attention away from him. It doesn't stop some of the fans from approaching him and starting conversations with him. He's the one who added a small library of books (Xemnas calls it the Rotting Aggregation) for customers to read while they wait for service. He sometimes returns to the cafe to make a midnight snack for himself. Xaldin appreciates him because he often helps out and makes meals for him. He keeps a diary on his laptop that no one knows about, not even Xemnas.

Saix is the manager who spends most of his time in the Office (Werewolf's Solitude) He never emotes during service & gives everyone a poor living wage so Xemnas can have more money for himself. Axel & Roxas try to get a better salary, which strains his friendship with Axel. During the full moon, Saix is a lot more irritable & once got arrested for assaulting a customer who hated the cafe. He is jealous and believes that the superior members (4,5, 6 & 11) will take his position of power from him, which is why he is rude to Vexen, barely acknowledges Lexaeus & Zexion, not to mention he overheard Marluxia's plotting and is keeping a close eye on him. He loves bananas, which prompted Xigbar to constantly make dick jokes whenever Saix is eating one.

Axel is another chef in Org XIII. His signature spicy pizza is one of the more popular items on the meu. When Roxas tells Axel about not being able to live on his poor payments, Axel decides to split his wages with Roxas to support him. He begins to strain his friendship with Saix when they disagree with each other over the young Nobody. Axel & Roxas hang out at the clock tower to eat Sea Salt Ice Cream once they are done with work. He secretly has a fidget spinner, something that only Roxas and Xion know about.

Demyx is the janitor of Orgy XIII. He often sneaks away from the cafe because of how lazy he is when it comes to cleaning. One could say he puts more effort in trying to skip work than actually doing it. However, the Maid Cafe doubles as a Karaoke Bar (Desolate Ensemble) at night, which is the only time you will ever see Demyx passionate about working since he gets to sing & play the sitar as much as he wants. Before Member XI was recruited, Saix cut Demyx's salary because he got caught watching anime.

Luxord is another waiter at Organisation XIII. He frequently plays card games with the guests. His British accent & advanced vocabulary makes him one of the more popular maids. He's seen Yuffie, Aerith and Tifa visit this place so they can play blackjack and fangirl over Roxas.

Marluxia is a waiter. He is frequently mistaken to be a girl because of his long pink hair. Marluxia envies Xemnas’s fortune and he teamed up with Larxene so they can conspire to steal Xemnas's fortune and eliminate him. He contributed several menu items that use flowers as ingredients. Some of them aren't as popular as Axel's pizza or Vexen's ice cream, which he sees as an insult to his ego.

Larxene is the most popular waitress in Org XIII because she is the token female of the staff. Her good looks lead to many men visiting the cafe to catch a glimpse of her. She despises her job because of the amount of creeps that visit just to spew bad pick up lines and catcall her. She has a massive knife collection and often rotates weapons to show off/threaten people with.

Roxas may not be the fan favourite waiter according to the popularity contests, but he’s Yuffie’s favourite maid. Due to the long hours Saix forces everyone to work, Roxas feels overworked and wishes he could have more free time to spend with Axel and the HPO trio. Axel tries to take advantage of Roxas's new found attention by flirting with the FF girls and they either return the favor or ignore him.

Xion was completed the day before Roxas discovered his key blade. She stands on the sidewalk holding a sign with daily specials and greets the customers. Roxas, Axel and Xion hang out at the clock tower whenever they get the chance and watch the sunset while eating sea salt ice cream.

After the most recent popularity contest was held, Xemnas tallied the results & published the rankings of the maids:


  1. Xemnas (He always puts himself on top, no matter the subject of the list.)
  2. Larxene
  3. Lexaeus
  4. Luxord
  5. Axel
  6. Marluxia
  7. Zexion
  8. Demyx
  9. Roxas
  10. Saix
  11. Xaldin
  12. Xigbar
  13. Vexen
Xion did not exist when the contest was still active, hence her exclusion from the list.


Namine was in Castle Oblivion and Xemnas was the only one who knew about the location. Xigbar+Saix knew about what Xemnas wanted to do with Namine, but they don’t know what the chambers of Repose and Waking are. The Superior found Namine and commanded her to summon Sora, intending to turn him into a puppet. Sora and Riku are on the first floor and lowest basement in the castle respectively. Throughout Sora’s ascension to the 13th, Xemnas continued to lure him further into the castle. He even fought him a few times and summoned a Centaur Nobody to defeat and demoralize Sora.

The Nobody boss was defeated and Xemnas retreated. Jiminy makes sure to write a note thanking Namine for restoring their memories before jumping in the pod with Sora.


Roxas fells into a coma on Day 27 when Sora was placed in Suspended animation and woke up on Day 50. On Day 151, some heartless home in on Roxas and Xion because of their keyblade wielder status and they are forced to clear them out on Saix's orders. Yuffie and Aerith notice the keyblade, so they ask them about it, which is the catalyst for Roxas's identity crisis. While Xion gathers information from the FF girls, Roxas asks Xemnas who Sora is, only to be given a non-answer. His work ethic begins to erode as he spends more time wondering about Sora than serving customers.

Saix is harsher on him and Axel defends Roxas, which causes their old friendship to break down even further. After 19 days since the first time he used a Keyblade, Roxas decides to leave the organization so he can find Sora. Xion planned to go after Roxas, but Saix stopped her. Day 171 is when Riku visits Hollow Bastion. He meets Yuffie, Aerith and Tifa. They learn about Sora's condition and are glad to know Kairi is safe, although they tell Riku he should return to the islands and spend more time with her. Day 175 is significant because Roxas was found by both Riku and Saix.

Riku is about to take Sora through a corridor of darkness when Saix rushes in and attacks Riku. Determined to capture Roxas, Riku takes on Ansem's face as he summons the Guardian and eventually defeats Saix. However, Roxas is long gone by the time Riku wins the fight. Xion was in tears when Saix walked in on Day 176, carrying an unconscious Roxas. Xion spied on Xemnas, Xigbar and Saix in the Malice’s Retreat when they mentioned Ansem’s Castle. Roxas wakes up in Ansem's Castle and with a dramatic Bond villain speech, Xemnas revealed how he plans to build Kingdom Hearts, Xigbar and Saix fill the heartless producing machines with the customers they captured.

With no other choice, Roxas begins to slay Heartless everyday with Berserker Nobodies serving as watchmen to keep him in line. Xion told the FF girls about Roxas’s predicament and they held a rescue operation at midnight on Day 177. However, Ansem’s Castle was heavily guarded and only Xion could make it to the room Roxas was locked in while the others had to retreat. Xion sacrificed herself to protect Roxas. After he absorbed Xion’s memories and heart, his true power was unlocked and with two keyblades in hand, Roxas took out the Berserkers watching him & teleported to the cafe.

Saix spotted Roxas rushing towards the Malice’s Retreat and gave chase.
Despite being the victor of his duel with Saix, Roxas is injured. Xemnas is wearing the organisation coat (He's beginning to get serious about Kingdom Hearts) and starts taunting Roxas. Unfazed by his words, Roxas prepares for his last fight before Xemnas begins his assault. Initially, Roxas managed to hold his ground and even knocked down his former boss. Roxas got overconfident and moved in to finish off his boss, only for Saix to crush him from behind. Roxas felt his body going numb from exhaustion and saw visions of his happiest and saddest moments in life:

-The first time he could remember Axel taking him to the clock tower.
-Meeting Xion.
-Playing Struggle with Hayner, Pence teaching Roxas how to use a skateboard and impressing Olette with his Grandstander high score.
-Aerith telling him he has Sora’s key blade.
-The Heartless creation machine spawning the creatures of darkness.
-Xion’s death.

He was consumed by his own element in a flash of light, leaving nothing behind. Elsewhere, Sora feels Roxas rejoining him, along with the hurt Roxas and Xion suffered throughout their lives, setting up the start of KH2 in this AU.
 
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  • The Foreteller
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Wow, this was touching and beautiful... :'(

Lmfao though "Axel & Roxas try to get a better salary" XD
 

Caxinuld

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I spent over 3 hours on the original draft, which had Xion as the most frequent customer, but it got a little too silly with the hijinks so I cut a lot of content while adding some new stuff like the room nicknames, the KH underwear and the prelude to this AU's interpretation of KH2.

Saix spends all the munny he saves on rent, supplies and maintenance. It's not that expensive, but Xemnas wants to flaunt his wealth so he tells the Luna Diviner to underpay the other employees so he can keep more money for himself. Xigbar is exempt from this pay reduction, but Axel and Demyx really suffer from it while Roxas lost all his wages when he was caught on Day 261 in the year before KH2 began.
 

Not Ienzo

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This was great. XD

At first it was hilarious and the characters were pretty accurate (well as accurate as Xemnas and co running a maid cafe could possibly be anyway), but then it actually became touching and bittersweet which I didn't expect. QAQ Also I always found it kinda funny that Demyx is accused of being lazy when Xemnas does basically nothing unless he has to, lmao.
 

Caxinuld

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I planned to keep Xion out of this AU because I couldn't think of a good way to add her in at first, but I managed to come up with something. Xemnas is the laziest organization member, but Saix won't allow anyone to call him out on it so they just pick on Demyx.

Vexen was assigned by Xemnas to build a replica to take over if Roxas failed. She was finally completed on Day 7 after Roxas discovered his key blade. She stands on the sidewalk holding a sign with daily specials and greets the customers. Roxas, Axel and Xion hang out at the clock tower whenever they get the chance and watch the sunset while eating sea salt ice cream. Xion later discovered her own key blade when heartless attacked her and Roxas. The FF girls told them about their keyblades being identical to Sora’s, which is why they questioned Yuffie and Aerith about Sora until they ran out of information. Day 255 is when Roxas left the organization and Xion planned to find him, but Saix stopped her.

She was in tears when Saix walked in on Day 261, carrying an unconscious Roxas. Xion is spying on Xemnas, Xigbar and Saix in the Malice’s Retreat when they mention Ansem’s Castle. Xion told the FF girls about Roxas’s predicament and they held a rescue operation. However, Ansem’s Castle was heavily guarded and only Xion could make it to the room Roxas was locked in while the others had to retreat. Xion sacrifices herself to protect Roxas. After he absorbed Xion’s memories and heart, his true power was unlocked and with two keyblades in hand, Roxas took out the Berserkers watching him & teleported to the cafe. Saix spotted Roxas rushing towards the Malice’s Retreat and gave chase.


Despite being the victor of his duel with Saix, Roxas is injured. Xemnas is wearing the organisation coat (He's beginning to get serious about Kingdom Hearts) and starts taunting Roxas. Unfazed by his words, Roxas prepares for his last fight before Xemnas begins his assault. Initially, Roxas manages to hold his ground and even knocks down his former boss. Roxas gets overconfident and moves in to finish his boss, only for Saix to crush him from behind. Roxas feels his body going numb and sees visions of his happiest and saddest moments in life:


-The first time he could remember Axel taking him to the clock tower.
-Meeting Xion.
-Playing Struggle with Hayner, Pence teaching Roxas how to use a skateboard and impressing Olette with his Grandstander high score.
-Aerith telling him he has Sora’s key blade.
-The Heartless creation machine spawning the creatures of darkness.
-Xion’s death.

Events prior to the beginning of Roxas's career at the maid cafe


Namine was in Castle Oblivion and Xemnas was the only one who knew about the location. Xigbar+Saix knew about what Xemnas wanted to do with Namine, but they don’t know what the chambers of Repose and Waking are. The Superior found Namine and commanded her to summon Sora, intending to turn him into a puppet.
Sora and Riku are on the first floor and lowest basement in the castle respectively. Throughout Sora’s ascension to the 13th, Xemnas continued to lure him further into the castle. He even fought him a few times and summoned a Centaur Nobody to defeat and demoralise Sora. The Nobody boss was defeated and Xemnas retreated.

Timeline Changes



Roxas falls into a coma on Day 27 when Sora is placed in suspended animation and wakes up on Day 50. Day 151 is when Roxas & Xion discover their keyblades. It took much longer for Roxas and Xion to summon their weapons because Pete was busy looking for allies and building an army of Heartless on other worlds, hence the lack of Heartless on Hollow Bastion.
Day 170 is the day Roxas leaves the organisation.
Day 171 is when Riku visits Hollow Bastion and meets Yuffie and Aerith. They tell him about Sora's Nobody and Xion. 

Day 175 is significant because Roxas is caught between Riku and Saix. Saix proves too strong for Riku, so he has to tap into the power of darkness to win. However, he was knocked unconscious by Roxas and he ran off again.
Day 176 is the day Roxas got captured by Saix and taken to Ansem’s Castle. At midnight on Day 177, Yuffie, Aerith, Tifa and Xion organise a rescue operation to save Roxas. Xion sacrifices herself and Roxas loses his last fight.
 
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