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Help/Support ► Misjudged far too often.



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ThePromise

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Yo, so I get this problem a lot, and frankly its only now starting to irritate me when it comes to certain people. I know I can come off rude sometimes, but whenever I actually try and be nice, people generally enjoy seeing it as though I'm insulting them. If I was insulting them, they should know, but when you try to be nice and considerate, and TRY LIKE CRAZY not to cuss them out for some stupid accusations THEY put on you, they only walk away thinking they were right and weren't immature at all.(The horror of ignorance)

Anyone else get the problem, and can anyone help me solve this dilemma? ...Seems whenever someone's mad or having a crap day they like to make it seem like it was my fault to begin with when you try talking or explaining something to 'em.

Personally, I don't furrow my brows and growl angrily at the monitor while typing these 'insults' at people. I don't even need to cuss and people assume the worst ...so what's the deal here?..
 

Weeaboo

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Logically that would work, but illogically I can't knock the ignorance out of them. I'm only insulting if you take my comments as insulting, and some people got their head so far in their ass they can't see that.

Then try to pull their head out.

It should work that way.
 

Zero

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I have been around when you do that and I know how it makes people mad and the way to stop it is to stop saying rude things when people are having a bad day so they wont be ignorant or if people just go off on you then completely ignore them cause talking to them doesnt seem to work.
 

ThePromise

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Problem is this: How am I supposed to know when your day is bad? Shit, how about a warning first?..Or just ask me to stop talking to you and not be a complete dick about it, y'know?
 

ThePromise

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Y'know, I'd rather you not be here ..what with the whole 'lmao have you seen this guy on my profile?' bit.

Now I need some opinions and suggestions on how to fix this little vibe people seem to get around me.
 

nicoleohbugga

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I've kind of dealt with the same thing. Like, I'm a very sarcastic person, and some people take that as me being a bitch. I am such a nice person, but since I have my sarcasm, some people don't see that or care to wait and see my "nice" side, you know?
Basically, just be yourself. People will understand it's just who you are, and then eventually they will get over that little "rude" attitude, you know? :)
 

Ordeith

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Now I need some opinions and suggestions on how to fix this little vibe people seem to get around me.
Y'know, I'd rather you not be here

Even though you probably have a good reason for saying that, phrasing like that is a definite insult to people; I certainly wouldn't want to be flatly told that I'm not wanted around.

My advice would simply to tread more carefully in the future. Consider the effect of your words if said to someone in real life, or to yourself. Also, it never hurts to admit fault, either, even if your intentions were harmless; to always be defensive or hold yourself in the right can be annoying to some.
 

ThePromise

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I've kind of dealt with the same thing. Like, I'm a very sarcastic person, and some people take that as me being a bitch. I am such a nice person, but since I have my sarcasm, some people don't see that or care to wait and see my "nice" side, you know?
Basically, just be yourself. People will understand it's just who you are, and then eventually they will get over that little "rude" attitude, you know? :)

Hah, I doubt some will, but I have no problem being myself. I just try to be nicer around 'certain' people.

Even though you probably have a good reason for saying that, phrasing like that is a definite insult to people; I certainly wouldn't want to be flatly told that I'm not wanted around.

My advice would simply to tread more carefully in the future. Consider the effect of your words if said to someone in real life, or to yourself. Also, it never hurts to admit fault, either, even if your intentions were harmless; to always be defensive or hold yourself in the right can be annoying to some.

Well it was much better than a flat out 'fuk no gtfo', so when you think about it, saying it like that was better than anything else that could've been said. I have my reasons for not wanting her to comment, and I'll be glad to show you if you really wanna know why.

I tread fine as far as I know, and I admit any fault I see is mine, but sometimes its not just the case. People enjoy pinning fault entirely on you without admitting their own. But yeah, I'll try to be EXTRA careful around some people then cause ...well, some people just don't get you.
 

nicoleohbugga

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Hah, I doubt some will, but I have no problem being myself. I just try to be nicer around 'certain' people.



Well it was much better than a flat out 'fuk no gtfo', so when you think about it, saying it like that was better than anything else that could've been said. I have my reasons for not wanting her to comment, and I'll be glad to show you if you really wanna know why.

I tread fine as far as I know, and I admit any fault I see is mine, but sometimes its not just the case. People enjoy pinning fault entirely on you without admitting their own. But yeah, I'll try to be EXTRA careful around some people then cause ...well, some people just don't get you.

Also, my boyfriend sort of has the same problem as you(or at least i think it's similar)
He's a sweetheart, but the way he talks sometimes is totally rude. Like, he doesn't really think about how to word things, and if that's the same thing you're dealing with, then that is a problem. Because people will eventually just say "screw you," you know? My boyfriend has gotten better, and people have noticed, including me. So if it's your tone, or choice of words, just think about it first, you know? Trust me, it will make things a lot easier.
 

nicoleohbugga

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Probably the choice of words ..I find myself having to do :3 :D and such a lot so people get that I don't mean any harm.
Haha, usually when I make faces like that when I say something "bitchy" it's because I really mean what I say, but I don't want them to take it seriously. Don't worry people. I haven't done it on here yet...or have I? :p


jk, I seriously haven't.

Btw, I really like your sig, Soluus! :)
 

ThePromise

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Haha, usually when I make faces like that when I say something "bitchy" it's because I really mean what I say, but I don't want them to take it seriously. Don't worry people. I haven't done it on here yet...or have I? :p


jk, I seriously haven't.

Well yeah I do that sometimes too, but it's gonna be really obvious when I'm being rude on purpose >.> other times its just ...take the fuking hint! lol
 

Ordeith

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Well it was much better than a flat out 'fuk no gtfo', so when you think about it, saying it like that was better than anything else that could've been said. I have my reasons for not wanting her to comment, and I'll be glad to show you if you really wanna know why.

I never disputed that you had reasons for saying what you said, but just tried to make the point that phrasing is everything.
You could have said, "I don't appreciate you being here," or "You aren't exactly the best person to talk to about this." I don't know the details of any of these disagreements you've gotten into, but it's important to remain civil in an argument, and to try and see from all perspectives.

I tread fine as far as I know, and I admit any fault I see is mine, but sometimes its not just the case. People enjoy pinning fault entirely on you without admitting their own. But yeah, I'll try to be EXTRA careful around some people then cause ...well, some people just don't get you.

In situations like that, I've found it best to look at things from a neutral perspective and see if the other person's argument has any merit. If so, apologize; if not, then don't.
 

ThePromise

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I never disputed that you had reasons for saying what you said, but just tried to make the point that phrasing is everything.
You could have said, "I don't appreciate you being here," or "You aren't exactly the best person to talk to about this." I don't know the details of any of these disagreements you've gotten into, but it's important to remain civil in an argument, and to try and see from all perspectives.



In situations like that, I've found it best to look at things from a neutral perspective and see if the other person's argument has any merit. If so, apologize; if not, then don't.

Well those suggestions to me, sound a bit more rude than what I say, but there's no clear winner for it.

Trust me, I'm not, lol. I have no reason to say sorry.
 
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