Help/Support ► looking for advice

[Artemis]

ok, if you are just going to flame or post truly unhelpful advice for fun, please just dont post at all


i have a guy friend who i am extremely tight with. i only consider him my friend, but i dont know what the hell he is thinking about me. sometimes he claims we are just friends, sometimes he openly admits that he really likes me. he displays the qualities of a person aiming to just be friends, but he also flirts too much, along with other "non friendy things" to really just be my friend.

i guess at some points i returned his flirtations, but i dont want to date him. i have had problems trying to date him in the past, each time i end up heartbroken. so i thought that being friends would be nice, ya know?

well, i really need advice on what i should do. i know i should set him straight before he falls too hard...

 

[Nostalgia]

As a guy, I know this won't be easy for him to hear, but you should seriously discuss it with him. Tell him to be honest about how he feels for you. Playing games can be fun, but he's probably just as confused as you are. It's best to have a straightforward conversation with him about it. I respect you for the simple fact that you're concerned and are wondering what to do as opposed to plenty of girls I know that would just be a cock tease about it (please excuse the crudity, but it's necessary to make the point). It may hurt him if he feels something for you, but it's the right thing to do since you truly are his friend. I hope this helps you at least somewhat.

 

[Iridium]

Someone always beats me to it T.T
Well just follow your heart, tell him honestly how you feel.

Pretty much it.

 

[Artemis]

thanks for the advice
it really does help
well, believe it or not, my situation just changed a little

i am extremely pissed off at him right now
he did something stupid and now i really dont want to talk to him

 

[Nostalgia]

Well then definitely wait, don't do anything to help the situation when your heart isn't fully into it. You could accidentally wreck the friendship or something.

 

[Artemis]

ugh
i am so pissed at him right now that i think it would be better if we didnt talk anyways
i think he is feeling a bit crappy too, so that would probably only make us both feel worse

although i really wanna kick his ass right now (sorry for the vulgarity, i am just pissed lol)

 

[Nostalgia]

No need to apologize, since I used 'cock tease' before lol. If it's not too personal to ask, what did he do that pissed you off?

 

[Iridium]

although i really wanna kick his ass right now (sorry for the vulgarity, i am just pissed lol)

You could have said a lot worse, just see me post on a bad day XD

No need to apologize, since I used 'cock tease' before lol. If it's not too personal to ask, what did he do that pissed you off?

If it's more how you say private you could PM it, or to me too X3

 

[Artemis]

haha
no its not private, it might just sound weird to you all

well, he had pissed me off already today by ignoring me in front of all of my and his friends. he barely even looked at me, which is a big no no

and all week, he has been guy PMSing
he has been real snippy some days, short and tempered, and nice some others

but tonight he started wigging out and acting all depressed
he told me how he felt sick and tired of not being happy and that he had decided to cut his wrists in order to feel better...
and after i got all upset, he told me it was a joke

it might not sound like a big deal, but it just pissed me off
he knows that i dislike personal abuse like that, and it was a sick joke

 

[Nostalgia]

Okay, as for the first part, I kinda figured he might react that way. It seems like he's slowly realizing how you feel and his male pride is hurting. It's a very typical way for a guy to act in that situation. As for the 2nd part, he was just being a douche, you're right to be angry.

 

[Iridium]

That is fairly disturbing....

He used the self mutilation card which is quite stupid.
I mean I have complex emotions and can be moody but damn that's extreme for me (Then again I did contemplate on suicide several times). No wonder why you are pissed at him, he's being narcissistic by telling you what he's going to do to himself (which is possibly a sick joke or a way to get attention) and he ignores you. No offense or anything but he's a douchebag, tell him to grow a proper set of balls so he can grow up.

 

[Artemis]

ya know, you guys really are helping

i just never thought he would sink this low. i am not really in the mood for telling him that i dont like him any more than a friend, and right now he is dancing on the line of being my friend at all

gah, he is a douche

 

[Nostalgia]

Guys like him do these stupid things and our entire gender is frowned upon. It's not my place to tell you to forget about him or anything of the sort, but I would suggest give yourself some time cool off and in the meantime, maybe he'll realize what an ass he's being.

 

[Iridium]

ya know, you guys really are helping

i just never thought he would sink this low. i am not really in the mood for telling him that i dont like him any more than a friend, and right now he is dancing on the line of being my friend at all

gah, he is a douche

I actually thought you were going to yell at us >_> (or just me) I'm glad we could help ^^

Guys like him do these stupid things and our entire gender is frowned upon. It's not my place to tell you to forget about him or anything of the sort, but I would suggest give yourself some time cool off and in the meantime, maybe he'll realize what an ass he's being.

Agreed.
This is just advice, you make the proper decisions however.
So just take a breather for now and contemplate of telling him, in the proper manner.

For the love of god don't blow up in his face

 

[Artemis]

I actually thought you were going to yell at us >_> (or just me) I'm glad we could help ^ ^

nope, best help i have gotten ever
no need to yell =D

i wont blow up on him, although i would love to
i will probably do like you both said too, and wait a while before i say anything to him...
i am just reluctant to even think about speaking to him tho

i would kick him, but since he went "emo", he would probably enjoy the pain too much
bastard

 

[Nostalgia]

i would kick him, but since he went "emo", he would probably enjoy the pain too much
bastard

That's gotta be the coolest thing I've heard someone say all week. XD

 

[Iridium]

nope, best help i have gotten ever
no need to yell =D

i wont blow up on him, although i would love to
i will probably do like you both said too, and wait a while before i say anything to him...
i am just reluctant to even think about speaking to him tho

i would kick him, but since he went "emo", he would probably enjoy the pain too much
bastard

Physical abuse won't do much, it's not wise either >_>
Still your situation sounds sort of like my friendship with a girl.

We're very compatible (Me=Scorpio, Her= Taurus XD yeah I believe in that stuff but not entirely. It does help a lot though) and we are the best of friends. Though the first day I did meet her I had a physical attraction to her and the attraction was mutual, though I figured that out too late ._. We are the best of friends, and we could be something we talked about it before, but it would ruin the group friendships dynamics (if you want a more detailed description of what that is shoot me a pm). Better off being friends than lovers.

 

[Artemis]

That's gotta be the coolest thing I've heard someone say all week. XD

why thanks
anger inspires me

haha, i use to look up my zodiac in those horiscopes...mine never worked...dumb virgo
anyways, thats how it used to be with me and him. (also, you can PM me for deets if you want) once he dumped me the second time i decided i wouldnt like him as more than a friend...i guess if we wouldnt have gotten in this fight, thats how things still might have been...of course i would have been lying to him tho

 

[Nostalgia]

He broke up with you twice and still expects more from you? That's pitiful.

 

[Artemis]

actually, i think i am the pitiful one
for even dating him a second time
(although i like your idea of him being pitiful more!)

alot of pressure actually came from my friends, and he did seem to have changed since the first time...
well, never again