This has been bothering me for a while now. My best friend Nik, who I've known for 7-8 years, has moved away to Boston. We had about a year knowing this and I said goodbye to him last Friday. Work's been able to distract me enough, and I have some friends who are there for me anyways, so I'm managing to deal with it... It's still difficult, though, since it's so hard to stay in contact with someone that far away, when both of you are busy with your separate lives. He's going through a tough time, too, trying to meet people. I wish I could help him, but I don't even know how to meet people myself.
I'd appreciate ideas for me and him to still stay in contact, since skype won't work on our internet connections, and maybe ideas for him to meet new people in Boston.
Moving on from that, recently, I got my hair redone by my [calling her this for simplicity] friend, Julia. I met Julia through my exboyfriend Corey and they're married and have a kid so I have to listen to his bullshit whenever I go over, but it's fine, I know him well so I don't care. Julia, however, to be blunt about it... is a moron sometimes and it's hard for me to talk to her at some points. Other's, it's just shooting the shit, but other times, she's extremely quick to judge [i've heard "gross," "ew," "stupid," from her 3 times an hour at least, sometimes talking about people that I actually really like?], refuses to pick up a book or have a discussion about anything...
Not to mention she calls me ALL THE TIME to the point of sheer insanity to check up on me if I do agree to hang out later. "Where are you?" "When are you heading out?" "What route are you taking?" No texts, she's old fashioned like that. She needs to call. Sometimes she'll do it when I'm at work, even when I tell her not to call me. Nik joked before he left that she's my new wife now.
Ugh, point is, she did a decent job on my hair, but I'm actually considering not hanging out with her anymore, or if I do, on a strict professional basis because I can't deal with her bullshit anymore. Even then, she didn't tell me that my hair would cost me 100 dollars, compared to the 40 [just for the procedure] which included me buying the products that she kept talking up.
The main, and pretty much the thing that broke the camel's back for me, is during the process of her curling my hair and finishing it up, we started talking about Nik and him moving away, how I was holding up, all the feelings we had for each other, etc. I was talking about it all, saying I was just trying to get by day by day.
She said, "Yeah, you'll get past it soon enough."
"Yeah, I know. Just happened, though, so it's still a little rough. You're right though."
"Hate to say it though, you know, but everyone has a replacement. It's just how it is. I don't really ever take long to get over people, it's just whatever, you know?"
"I don't know about that, I don't really wanna think about replacing him... he's still there, he's just not able to physically hang out with me..."
"Well you're always welcome to come here and hang out with me."
"Yeah I know."
I'm just kind of, done, you know? I hate seeing her and my ex boyfriend fight while they have a kid, I hate dealing with her crazy antics, and the garbage bullshit that she spouts out of her mouth with no real thought of how it may come out to people [just being HONEST TEEHEEHEE no you're being a dumbass dick], hate arguing with her over the stupid shit she posts on facebook, and that conversation just fucking killed it all for me. I'm fucking done. Julia, you are not going to replace Nik for me. You cannot do that. Do not say that to someone like me, for fuck's sake.
But I have no idea how to even tell her that. I'm scared to tell her, scared of what my exboyfriend may do for hurting his wife's feelings, scared of what he'll do to her or the baby in the future because apparently i'm the only one of her friend's who knows of his abusive behavior. I don't want to feel responsible for that, but I just have it sitting there in the back of my mind, like something's going to happen.
i also apologize for how messy this post is, but i really don't know how to break this to her with all the outcomes that are in my head right now
I'd appreciate ideas for me and him to still stay in contact, since skype won't work on our internet connections, and maybe ideas for him to meet new people in Boston.
Moving on from that, recently, I got my hair redone by my [calling her this for simplicity] friend, Julia. I met Julia through my exboyfriend Corey and they're married and have a kid so I have to listen to his bullshit whenever I go over, but it's fine, I know him well so I don't care. Julia, however, to be blunt about it... is a moron sometimes and it's hard for me to talk to her at some points. Other's, it's just shooting the shit, but other times, she's extremely quick to judge [i've heard "gross," "ew," "stupid," from her 3 times an hour at least, sometimes talking about people that I actually really like?], refuses to pick up a book or have a discussion about anything...
Not to mention she calls me ALL THE TIME to the point of sheer insanity to check up on me if I do agree to hang out later. "Where are you?" "When are you heading out?" "What route are you taking?" No texts, she's old fashioned like that. She needs to call. Sometimes she'll do it when I'm at work, even when I tell her not to call me. Nik joked before he left that she's my new wife now.
Ugh, point is, she did a decent job on my hair, but I'm actually considering not hanging out with her anymore, or if I do, on a strict professional basis because I can't deal with her bullshit anymore. Even then, she didn't tell me that my hair would cost me 100 dollars, compared to the 40 [just for the procedure] which included me buying the products that she kept talking up.
The main, and pretty much the thing that broke the camel's back for me, is during the process of her curling my hair and finishing it up, we started talking about Nik and him moving away, how I was holding up, all the feelings we had for each other, etc. I was talking about it all, saying I was just trying to get by day by day.
She said, "Yeah, you'll get past it soon enough."
"Yeah, I know. Just happened, though, so it's still a little rough. You're right though."
"Hate to say it though, you know, but everyone has a replacement. It's just how it is. I don't really ever take long to get over people, it's just whatever, you know?"
"I don't know about that, I don't really wanna think about replacing him... he's still there, he's just not able to physically hang out with me..."
"Well you're always welcome to come here and hang out with me."
"Yeah I know."
I'm just kind of, done, you know? I hate seeing her and my ex boyfriend fight while they have a kid, I hate dealing with her crazy antics, and the garbage bullshit that she spouts out of her mouth with no real thought of how it may come out to people [just being HONEST TEEHEEHEE no you're being a dumbass dick], hate arguing with her over the stupid shit she posts on facebook, and that conversation just fucking killed it all for me. I'm fucking done. Julia, you are not going to replace Nik for me. You cannot do that. Do not say that to someone like me, for fuck's sake.
But I have no idea how to even tell her that. I'm scared to tell her, scared of what my exboyfriend may do for hurting his wife's feelings, scared of what he'll do to her or the baby in the future because apparently i'm the only one of her friend's who knows of his abusive behavior. I don't want to feel responsible for that, but I just have it sitting there in the back of my mind, like something's going to happen.
i also apologize for how messy this post is, but i really don't know how to break this to her with all the outcomes that are in my head right now