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Fanfiction ► Kingdom Hearts The bond of the ninja and number XV



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Lanydx

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I worked on this and I hope you like It. A KH Naruto Crossover with a twist


Kingdom Hearts: The bond of the Ninja and number XV
By Lanydx
Chapter Zero part one
… It was a dark and stormy night on the entire planet Earth.
The United Nations had fallen; the world’s armies were no match against the new terror. Their small black bodies made them fast and not easy to hit, the yellow dots that were their eyes saw nothing but to kill and take the hearts of men, women, children, and animals hearts. They were the Heartless and they were HUNGRY!!!
The cities were torn to ruble and the Heartless were taking any one they could find. One boy saw the Heartless take his family. All he could do was run in the ruined city. He looked about the age of fifteen, black hair, wearing a red T-shirt and black jeans. It’s my fault! He thought in his head. He saw the shadowy demons lunge at him Crap I’m dead! He screamed.Who said that? Whispered a voice in his head. Out of nowhere in his hand came giant silver key like sword with at the bottom of it had a cross as a key chain. What the heck is this thing? He said as he waved it around The Keyblade or to be more accurate THE BOND OF FAITH. It will aid you servant of Christ. Once again said the voice. The boy noticed the Heartless were backing away but more were coming. OK Bring it on! He yelled with fake bravo. He charged at them slashing the Keyblade into their faces as they slowly died and turned into smoke.


Not bad kid. Said a flaming red headed man who had his back to what was left of a wall. He was wearing a black hooded coat and a sarcastic grin on his face. He had some fire in his mysterious green eyes. The name’s Axel. A-X-E-L Got it memorized? said the man of mystery. The kid clapped his hands Very good you spelled your name right. mocked the youth. Axel walked to the equity sarcastic teen and grabbed him by the arm. Look kid I have powers you could not even think of and I'm in a bad mood so word to the wise don't tick me of. Got it? He only node because of the pain. Axel let go of the kid's arm. So do you know what these little monsters are? Asked the kid. There called Heartless and there are bigger and meaner ones the the little shadows. repealed the red head. Suddenly out of the ground a bigger looking Heartless that looked like the smaller ones only with a beard and giant arms. The Heartless name was Darkside. Like him? said the creep ed out kid. Oh give me a break! Next time Xigbar tells me to go to a world I’ll shove his guns right up his ass. screamed the outraged Axel. Axel summoned his chakrams in a fiery way of fire. Dang that’s cool. said the impressed teen. Thanks but you haven't seen ANYTHING yet! grained Axel. They both charged that the titan of darkness.

Darkside saw the attack coming and blasted a dark energy beam from his eyes. Axel easily wrapped away from the beams but our new Keyblade wielder had a bit more of a rough time. Axel reappeared to Darkside's face and set it on fire. CRAP! You never told me you could do that! shouted the kid as he was hitting the monster's arms and shadows that were coming from the portals they made. Axel ignored him and threw his chakrams at Darkside's neck. They spun into it's neck and chopped off his head! The rest of the body slowly died and blew up. Axel landed on his feet to the ground. Well that was fun. said the kid dripping with sarcasm. Hey imagine doing this for a job. laughed the red head. Well Well what do we have here? A nobody and a brat with something that shouldn't be his. stated a wicked, cold, and ominous voice. Ansem, Axel said with an angry tone.
( I re did this. I'll do the same with the other so called chapters. Then the next chapter will be done. until then... Lanydx.)

Lanydx
 
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Lanydx

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Wow I can't believe I did Finally Whoa Woo!
 
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Lanydx

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He's coming in chapter 4 and boy I have a few ideas on what to do with that.
 
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Lanydx

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Chapter zero part two


"Ansem?" the kid asked. He looked behind Axel to notice a floating tan skinned, white haired man who's yellow eyes looked like they were stolen from Satin himself. Not to mention the demonic looking Heartless on his back. "What's with the freak show over here?" asked the kid. Axel didn't let his guard down.
" Kid you better watch what you to him! He's the Heartless LEADER! Got it memorized?" asked Axel." "Wait so YOU sent these things here?!" shouted the teen. "Indeed I did." laughed the mad man. "Now be a good boy and hand over that Key." Commanded the anti-Christ as he stretched out his hand. " YOU MONSTER!!!" Shouted the angry teen as he charged at Ansem. "KID DON'T.."Axel cried but it was in vain. The kid lunged the Keyblade into Ansem's chest.


He laughed like it was just a small scratch "Well that stung." Ansem said. The Monster grabbed the kid by the neck while Ansem picked up the Keyblade. "Well this could be something useful to me." muttered the mad man. The Keyblade changed color from silver to black and the handle red with the Heartless symbol as it's key chain. "What are..." He could say nothing more due to the Dark Keyblade being stabbed in his chest. His body disappeared and in its place came a new born shadow.

Axel was shocked. What DID you DO to him?! I was starting to LIKE him!! Screamed the ticked red head. "I opened him to the power of darkness." stated the amused Ansem. The world shock all over. Bits of it were coming apart Axel had not choice but to leave. He made a dark portal and walked away. His mission was done. Earth fell to the Heartless.

The boy felt himself drowning in a black sea. He was NOT going to let this beat him! "NOT NOW NOT EVER!!" Yelled the rebelling kid. He felt pain everywhere. "What's happening to me?" he asked. He saw a light , a way out and took it. He became a nobody but with his full body in tact.


one thousand miles away. In the hidden Leaf Village. The young blonde haired , blue eyed, ourngie jumpsuit wearing Naruto saw a star go out. "What the heck was that? he asked himself. He had a feeling since he came back from getting Granny Tsunade to be the fifth Hokage that something big was going to happen. Even the Nine tailed Fox was saying that and THAT meant trouble for everyone.

he wasn't alone planets away, Sora the fourteen year old Keyblade master saw that same star die after taking a break form killing heartless in Traverse Town. "Dang one more world bites the dust." he muttered as he screched his head full of brown hair. He got upat noticed his yellow clown shoes. "Man I need some new shoes." He mouned Later has he was walking Sora soon saw a boy show up out of nowhere on the pavement. " WHAT THE HECK!!"


(I Re did this one too.)

Lanydx
 
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Lanydx

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(Alright time for chapter one)

Chapter 1 part one Sora and Naruto


Sora looked at the knocked out kid. Sora noticed his white hair and was wearing a black rain coat. Sora checked his chest for a heart beat but couldn't find it. "Oh great just my luck I find a dead guy." Moaned the spiky haired kid. Sora put on some gloves to drag the dead body to a nearby dumpster when the kid was starting to come around. "Ooh my head." yawned the awoken kid. Sora dropped him and out of panic hit him over the head with his gold and silver keyblade. "DIE ZOMBIE!!!" he yelled as he hit him over and over again. "wait! I'm NOT a zombie!" shouted the kid. Sora stopped "Oh sorry then." Sora helped him up and dusted him off. "Um again sorry." apologized Sora. "Forget about it." replied the kid. "I'm Sora." he stated to the kid."I'm sorry I wish I could tell MY name ,but I don't remember it." He said sadly. Sora just grinned "Well then I'll give GIVE you one. How about L?" asked Sora. "Um sure L it is!" Said L.


"So Sora WHERE are we?" L asked. Sora stretched his arms " Traverse Town." L noticed the small humanoid black monsters. It had sharp claws, A symbol of a red and black heart with a red X in the middle, and it's face was masked by what looked to be a knight's helmet. "Dang more Heartless!" Sora muttered. He got in his battle pose and let them have it. Sora slashed his Keyblade into their legs, shot a fire ball from the tip at them, and shot lighting at them. Soon they were history. Sora just grinned "Well they weren't so tough!" He said smiling but he missed one and it was going to attack him from behind. "SORA WACTH OUT!!!" He unknowly summoned a giant sword that looked like the ones from Bleach,shot out from the sword a sound wave that shattered the Heartless and a few windows too." Whoa!" said shouted the impressed Sora. L was shocked."Did I do that?" Sora gave him a friendly punch in the arm. "Yep you sure did L." An old man came out from one of the buildings .He picked up a shotgun and pointed it at them. "HEY YOU PUNKS BROKE MY WINDOW!!" He shouted with drunken rage. "Running time." Sora said as they both ran for the hills while the old man fired his gun at them.

On a tail building not far from there two hooded men where watching Sora and L. "Well it looks look Axel's theory was right on the money." muttered one of them. "Should we grab him now Xigbar?" Xigbar made a hand gesture. Nah lets see what he does alright Girly." The hooded woman kicks him in the lug nuts and he bend over."Call me "girly" again and your dead got it? she asked "Got it." he moaned.


As Sora and L ran from the old man's gun shots a small photo fell out of Sora's pocket. He picked it up and looked at it. It showed Sora making a funny face with two other people,a muscular long silver haired boy in baggy pants and yellow sleeveless shirt. The girl was a red head. She had sparking blue eyes and was wearing a top that looked a little too small in the chest area which got L's full attention,she also was wearing a mini skirt. She was making a kissing face to Sora Which made L laugh. "Hey Sora who's your girlfriend?" He said showing him the photo.Sora took it from him out of embarrassment ."They're my best friends Riku and Kairi." He explained to L. L looked at him"So is she taken?" He asked jokingly."YES I.I mean yeah she is."He said. "We lived on this inland and when the Heartless came and took it over the inland, Kiari vanished and Riku went to the darkness." He told him "I got the Keyblade and I'm hanging with my new friends Donald and Goofy who are looking for their king Mickey."L just listened as Sora went on."We go from world to world getting rid of the Heartless and look for our friends ." He smiled "I guess you think I'm nuts huh?" He asked. L just closed his eyes and said "Nope and I want to help you on your crazy plan if you'll let me." Sora took out his hand for a hand shake. "It's a deal." Sora said to him. They shook hands making a new and first friendship. Sora ran from him "Come on I want you to meet Donald,Goofy and some of my friends in the town!" Yelled Sora. L ran right behind him.



(Hope this is longer for you guys.)
Lanydx
 
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Lanydx

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Chapter 1 part 2 Sora



Sora and L had left the ally leading them to the first distract. It was used mostly for business for people could be seen eating at the restaurant The crazy beer, shops for potions and weapons for travelers, An inn, and Cid's the place for gummi ship maps for outer worldly travel. Their is also a main gate and Gummi ship dock which Sora and L were walking to. L was still asking questions about Sora's adventures. "So this town and your inland are their own worlds and their are more like them?" He asked. Sora was starting to enjoy being L's source of knowledge."Yeah and this town was made for people who lost their home worlds to the Heartless." He replied like he knew everything."So I guess your world got taken over but how did you come here?" He asked. "HEELLO!! Do you forget that I'M the one who woke out here with no memory?"L said wale knocking on Sora's head. Sora was blocking him. "Hey stop that! I need those Brian cells to think." Sora yelled.They stopped messing around due to the fact that in the distance was a young black haired girl wearing a head band, a yellow top, and short shorts that was running toward them with something in her arms.

"HEY SORA!!" Yelled the running girl as she waved to them. Sora looked her with a smile."Hey Yuffie long time no see!" He shouted to her. Unfortunately she didn't notice a small broad on the paved ground and tripped over it."AAHH!!"She yelled as she fell on her face. Sora and L ran to help her. They both picked her up and helped her dust off but L accidentally had tripped and his hands felt Yuffie's chest. L didn't know what to think "It's so soft!" He thought.Yuffie on the other hand didn't like that one bit and punched him the face."HEY HANDS OFF SICKO!!" Yuffie shrieked. That knocked poor L into a wall. Sora was a little stunned at how far Yuffie slugged him."Ah Yuffie I'm sorry L didn't mean to do that." Sora said to save L's skin. "Oh I'm SO sure!!" The hot tempered Yuffie said dripping with sarcasm.L came out of the wall. He looked at her more closely now. Her cheeks were now red,her eye had some spark of power to them, and her lips were in a frown but they still looked nice. L didn't know what to think about her.Just looking at her made him feel all warm inside."HELLEO!! Earth to L."Sora said as he waved his hand over his eyes." L snapped out of it and bowed to Yuffie."I'm sorry for that . I really didn't mean to that please forgive me. Yuffie looked at him." I forgive you and any friend of Sora's is a friend of mine."

She looked at the item she dropped finding it broken."Oh man Cid's gonna kill me." Sora looked at her "What's up?" He asked Yuffie sat down on a nearby bunch. "Well I needed you to go to a world called Hidden Leaf Village to drop something off for me but you don't know where it is so I asked Cid if I could borrow one of his Gummi maps.As you can see it's broken so now I'm dead." She explained. Sora said L and I 'll go to Cid's for you and go to this Hidden Leaf Village too!" He stated "Come on L! " He said as he was walking away.They had walked near a small shop as Sora opened the door a middle aged blond man holding a shot gun fired at them "GET OUT OF HERE YA STUIPD HEARTLESS!!" He yelled in rage. Sora and L hit the deck as Cid fired again L yelled at Sora "WHY IS EVERYONE HERE GUN CRAZY?!" Cid stopped to look at the two boys."Oh hey Sora and..."They got up and L told him "L." He said as he lowered the gun. "Um Cid we need this prat fixed." He showed him the broken Gummi block. Cid looked at it for a little bit "Well it's not unfix-able but I will charge a fee for it."He grinned. Sora took out is wallet and payed the old man. One hour later outside the shop L held the good as new map in his hands as they walked away.

Sora and L just noticed the robed and ponity hat wearing dunk running at full speed to them. He came up and hit Sora in the head with his staff. "Sora where have you been? Goofy and I have been woried sick and have been looking everywhere for you!" He said at him like he was his mother. Sora rubbed his head. "Ow. Sorry Donold but I was busy with somthing and I.." Donold cut him to the chase "Yeah Goofy and I know Yuffie told us. so lets go to the Hidden Leaf Village or whatever it's called." L looked at him "Name's L." he introdoced himself. "Donold Duck." the three friends went for the ship hanger.


Lanydx.)
 
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Deeman

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Your chapters are much too short. Even shorter than the ones in 5-year old story books.

Your writing has room for much improvement.
I'd advise you to consider improving your English, writing, vocabulary, and grammar abilities before attempting to write a story. The story you have here as no flow whatsoever, a depth-lacking plot, and confusing dialogue.

Writing a story requires time, skill, and effort.
 

Lanydx

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Your chapters are much too short. Even shorter than the ones in 5-year old story books.

Your writing has room for much improvement.
I'd advise you to consider improving your English, writing, vocabulary, and grammar abilities before attempting to write a story. The story you have here as no flow whatsoever, a depth-lacking plot, and confusing dialogue.

Writing a story requires time, skill, and effort.

One: I am GETTING to the main plot !I now am focusing on character development.
Two: the quotes are fine.
Three: The resoin for the short chapters is because this is taking its toil on me.
Four: My good sir keep reading and you will see improvement.
 

madammina

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Er, I'm agreeing with Deeman

You need to have an idea in your head when you're writing this. It seems to be right now "Sora meets Naruto" And, um, I can't really see it. How will they meet?

Your timeline is all over the place, it needs to flow.. right now it jumps.

You don't have to put them up alot. It is better to get chapters right then done quickly.

Dialogue, like Dee said, is confusing.

Who is L? Who is anyone talking too? Where are they? How did Sora get from Leaf Village to Traverse Town? Space things out first and maybe we can figure out what is going on.

Look, everyone must start out somewhere. Just don't get mad at us and take are criticisms to heart. Once you start conciously using what we suggest you'll find your writing getting alot better.

Also tryi the Beta-Readers. They can help too. Send them your upcoming chapter, and listen to waht they say too.
 
A

Azrael

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Er, I'm agreeing with Deeman

You need to have an idea in your head when you're writing this. It seems to be right now "Sora meets Naruto" And, um, I can't really see it. How will they meet?

Your timeline is all over the place, it needs to flow.. right now it jumps.

You don't have to put them up alot. It is better to get chapters right then done quickly.

Dialogue, like Dee said, is confusing.

Who is L? Who is anyone talking too? Where are they? How did Sora get from Leaf Village to Traverse Town? Space things out first and maybe we can figure out what is going on.

Look, everyone must start out somewhere. Just don't get mad at us and take are criticisms to heart. Once you start conciously using what we suggest you'll find your writing getting alot better.

Also tryi the Beta-Readers. They can help too. Send them your upcoming chapter, and listen to waht they say too.


I agree.

Then again it's probably his first fan-fic.

There needs to be a reason how the two universes connect and get things much more connected
 

Lanydx

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(I take your words of wisdom. I ''ll explain L is Lanydx number 15. Sora has not been to Leaf Village yet. L 's world is gone and his nobody formed in Traverse Town where Sora met him. The the Organization MAY have something to with the leaf Village. The time line is KH1 before Hollow Bastion. L will later get his TURE name . L was a Death Note joke. Next chapter was be soon after soon long thinking.

Lanydx
 

madammina

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Great, but that should be IN the text, not in the addendum to the text after we complained. just for future reference. Thanks though. It helps.
 

Lanydx

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I'm re working on the old chapters.I just worked on chapter Zero part one so enjoy.

the servent of Christ
Lanydx
 

madammina

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I worked on this and I hope you like It. A KH Naruto Crossover with a twist


Kingdom Hearts: The bond of the Ninja and number XV
By Lanydx
Chapter Zero part one
… It was a dark and stormy night on the entire planet Earth.
The United Nations had fallen; the world’s armies were no match against the new terror. Their small black bodies made them fast and not easy to hit, the yellow dots that were their eyes saw nothing but to kill and take the hearts of men, women, children, and animals hearts. They were the Heartless and they were HUNGRY!!!
The cities were torn to ruble and the Heartless were taking any one they could find. One boy saw the Heartless take his family. All he could do was run in the ruined city. He looked about the age of fifteen, black hair, wearing a red T-shirt and black jeans. It’s my fault! He thought in his head. He saw the shadowy demons lunge at him Crap I’m dead! He screamed.Who said that? Whispered a voice in his head. Out of nowhere in his hand came giant silver key like sword with at the bottom of it had a cross as a key chain. What the heck is this thing? He said as he waved it around The Keyblade or to be more accurate THE BOND OF FAITH. It will aid you servant of Christ. Once again said the vice. The boy noticed the Heartless were backing away but more were coming. OK Bring it on! He yelled with fake bravo. He charged at them slashing the Keyblade into their faces as they slowly died and turned into smoke.


Not bad kid. Said a flaming red headed man who had his back to what was left of a wall. He was wearing a black hooded coat and a sarcastic grin on his face. He had some fire in his mysterious green eyes. The name’s Axel. A-X-E-L Got it memorized? said the man of mystery. The kid clapped his hands Very good you spelled your name right. mocked the youth. Axel walked to the equity sarcastic teen and grabbed him by the arm. Look kid I have powers you could not even think of and I'm in a bad mood so word to the wise don't tick me of. Got it? He only node because of the pain. Axel let go of the kid's arm. So do you know what these little monsters are? Asked the kid. There called Heartless and there are bigger and meaner ones the the little shadows. repealed the red head. Suddenly out of the ground a bigger looking Heartless that looked like the smaller ones only with a beard and giant arms. The Heartless name was Darkside. Like him? said the creep ed out kid. Oh give me a break! Next time Xigbar tells me to go to a world I’ll shove his guns right up his ass. screamed the outraged Axel. Axel summoned his chakrams in a fiery way of fire. Dang that’s cool. said the impressed teen. Thanks but you haven't seen ANYTHING yet! grained Axel. They both charged that the titan of darkness.

Darkside saw the attack coming and blasted a dark energy beam from his eyes. Axel easily wrapped away from the beams but our new Keyblade wielder had a bit more of a rough time. Axel reappeared to Darkside's face and set it on fire. HOLY CRAP! You never told me you could do that! shouted the kid as he was hitting the monster's arms and shadows that were coming from the portals they made. Axel ignored him and threw his chakrams at Darkside's neck. They spun into it's neck and chopped off his head! The rest of the body slowly died and blew up. Axel landed on his feet to the ground. Well that was fun. said the kid dripping with sarcasm. Hey imagine doing this for a job. laughed the red head. Well Well what do we have here? A nobody and a brat with something that shouldn't be his. stated a wicked, cold, and ominous voice. Ansem, Axel said with an angry tone.
( I re did this. I'll do the same with the other so called chapters. Then the next chapter wll be done. untill then... Lanydx.)

Lanydx

GREATLY improved Landyx! It's now pretty coherent. But you need to do to small things to REALLY improve it.

One, Put quotation marks around a character's speech. i.e. "Not a bad kid."

two, Every time a character different from teh one before talks, a new paragraph is started.

So
example said:
"Not bad kid". Said a flaming red headed man who had his back to what was left of a wall. He was wearing a black hooded coat and a sarcastic grin on his face. He had some fire in his mysterious green eyes." The name’s Axel. A-X-E-L Got it memorized?" said the man of mystery. The kid clapped his hands

"Very good you spelled your name right." mocked the youth. Axel walked to the equity sarcastic teen and grabbed him by the arm.

" Look kid I have powers you could not even think of and I'm in a bad mood so word to the wise don't tick me of. Got it?"

But all in all, nice improvement. Once you master this, start working on the finer details.
 
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