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Fanfiction ► Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 68 posted)



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AdrianXXII

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 43 posted)

Nice chapter. Though the beginning of the chapter did seem a bit slow and calm, which is odd seeing how urgent it was for them to get out of the way. However it's nice to see that Ven is really recovering and I hope he'll manage to make a full recovery soon.

Them talking telepathically was a cool idea, but I'd imagine that they'd talk to each other normally like Sora and Ven did in BBS.

I liked how even though Roxas was trying to be calm and professional he still let his fears get in the way of his judgement, that's quite natural in such a situation.

I can't help, but feel like the Platform they're heading to isn't Sora's but Xion's, especially considering that she's suppose to appear soon. Though I might be wrong. I also think it's interesting that Roxas took the route, which is the most likely route that the Ray would go.
 

Sephiroth0812

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 43 posted)

I'm not sure what a board ray is...

Anyhow, I like seeing how Roxas was able to take Ventus heart and try to carry it safely to a new platform. I feel kind of bad that Roxas still has so much anxiety and anger; from feeling so helpless at times. Reminds me of all the times in KHII and Days he was so helpless and betrayed.

Another great chapter, Sephy. Can't wait to see the next one and what Roxas will do against the board ray.

Uh, I think you might have misread something a bit, lol, it's broad, as in "wide", not board. Switch the "r" to second place in the word, then it'll make sense. ^__^

To remind the readers of KH II and Days with this is exactly the aim behind it. If you look at it closely, Roxas should not even be awake and wander through Sora's heart like he does since chapter 1. He's just wandering around all alone and reliving all the painful memories from the year he was alive in the physical world over and over, the calmness he gained towards the end of KH 2 and is content with things are steadily eroded by that, furthermore because deep inside he still hates his fate.
The bad memories overshadowing the few good ones he has are, as much as him being awake in the first place, instigated by the menace though.

Right now Roxas' only concern is to keep Ven's heart out of the ray's path, disregarding his own safety. The next platform is too far away to reach since the ray has increased its speed.

...And let the chase begin. But then again, what is that thing?

And it's good to know that Roxas is, in fact, able to fix Ven's heart in some degree...

It's a continous energy ray loaded with something, what it is will be revealed next chapter.

This is a very important fact to take note of, just as the weird feelings Roxas sometimes has in his chest as well as the subconscious contact both Roxas and Ven are driven to seek.

This was a great chapter, Sephiroth! I'm looking more and more to it every time. :)

I'm glad to see that Ven's doing well, even it will take time to fully heal himself back to normal.

As for that storm, it had better pass quickly!!

I wonder if the next chapter involves Ven learning more about Roxas and his story..?

Gee, thanks.

Well, it should be no surprise by now that Roxas' presence is giving Ven's healing powers a mysterious boost, which has to do with Roxas himself but also to a certain degree with Sora.

Oh, it will pass. Only problem is that Roxas stands exactly in the way right now and that it is a continuous beam. <__<

I fear the developments in the next chapters won't leave time for that.

Nice chapter. Though the beginning of the chapter did seem a bit slow and calm, which is odd seeing how urgent it was for them to get out of the way. However it's nice to see that Ven is really recovering and I hope he'll manage to make a full recovery soon.

Them talking telepathically was a cool idea, but I'd imagine that they'd talk to each other normally like Sora and Ven did in BBS.

I liked how even though Roxas was trying to be calm and professional he still let his fears get in the way of his judgement, that's quite natural in such a situation.

I can't help, but feel like the Platform they're heading to isn't Sora's but Xion's, especially considering that she's suppose to appear soon. Though I might be wrong. I also think it's interesting that Roxas took the route, which is the most likely route that the Ray would go.

Calm yes, slow no as the whole thing happened probably in a matter of five minutes, besides, inside the heart-layer of reality "time" is relative. Not to mention that as long as Roxas remained inside Ven's heart, the ray kept its normal pace and was still far away, it only increased its speed later on when Roxas was already moving throughout Sora's heart. Although I will point out that the ray increasing its speed has not necessarily to do with Roxas but with other factors regarding the menace, Vanitas and Terra.

That Ven has recovered a bit up to the current time is for two main reasons, one is to show that Roxas' presence has really a positive factor and second it will be crucial for Ven to do something in no short time which he wouldn't be able to otherwise.

Sora and Ven could do that in BBS because both of their hearts were awake, remember that right now, with Ventus not only his outer self (the physical one) but also the inner self (the heart itself) is sleeping as well, so Ventus' consciousness is only "awake" inside his own heart, as awakening his heart would be detrimental to Sora's when done while still so badly wounded.

It is, especially since Roxas' situation is still highly unusual in general, which shows in him being confused several times throughout the whole story so far.

Oh yes, she will appear first in chapter 46, in a manner that benefits her status that everyone forgot her, which is ironically also the reason why she will be the first one to meet the menace face-to-face. ;)
Oh, so you realized it, lol, yeah, that's a little psychological thing as Roxas had two choices: A walkway going straightforward but at the same height and another which is spiraling downwards seemingly "into the dark abyss". Despite it being long, the next platform can be seen in the distance with the straight walkway while the downward going one the eventual goal cannot be seen. Somewhat fearing/mistrusting the unknown, Roxas took the straight walkway somewhat out of instinct.
Despite thinking to himself that it would be good to take a turn left or right to ascertain if the energy ray is directed or not with his mind, his instincts said otherwise and in the turmoil of the situation (he's hasty after all) he followed them.
 

AdrianXXII

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 43 posted)

Calm yes, slow no as the whole thing happened probably in a matter of five minutes, besides, inside the heart-layer of reality "time" is relative. Not to mention that as long as Roxas remained inside Ven's heart, the ray kept its normal pace and was still far away, it only increased its speed later on when Roxas was already moving throughout Sora's heart. Although I will point out that the ray increasing its speed has not necessarily to do with Roxas but with other factors regarding the menace, Vanitas and Terra.

That Ven has recovered a bit up to the current time is for two main reasons, one is to show that Roxas' presence has really a positive factor and second it will be crucial for Ven to do something in no short time which he wouldn't be able to otherwise.

Sora and Ven could do that in BBS because both of their hearts were awake, remember that right now, with Ventus not only his outer self (the physical one) but also the inner self (the heart itself) is sleeping as well, so Ventus' consciousness is only "awake" inside his own heart, as awakening his heart would be detrimental to Sora's when done while still so badly wounded.

It is, especially since Roxas' situation is still highly unusual in general, which shows in him being confused several times throughout the whole story so far.

Oh yes, she will appear first in chapter 46, in a manner that benefits her status that everyone forgot her, which is ironically also the reason why she will be the first one to meet the menace face-to-face. ;)
Oh, so you realized it, lol, yeah, that's a little psychological thing as Roxas had two choices: A walkway going straightforward but at the same height and another which is spiraling downwards seemingly "into the dark abyss". Despite it being long, the next platform can be seen in the distance with the straight walkway while the downward going one the eventual goal cannot be seen. Somewhat fearing/mistrusting the unknown, Roxas took the straight walkway somewhat out of instinct.
Despite thinking to himself that it would be good to take a turn left or right to ascertain if the energy ray is directed or not with his mind, his instincts said otherwise and in the turmoil of the situation (he's hasty after all) he followed them.

Well calm usually brings a certain amount of slowness with it. Well in the KH universe time is relative as a whole. Every world has it's own time flow, I guess this is even more true to the "world" within ones heart. Even if the ray was going in a consistent speed they should have realized that they had to hurry, after all they know nothing about the ray other than it's dangerous, but that's nitpicking, especially considering it's a realistic error for people in their situation to make.

Oh this sounds promising especially considering what's about to happen to Roxas.

So Roxas and Ventus kind of meet inside of the dream of Ventus' heart? Or am I getting the wrong idea?

Well Roxas typically is confused, sure not as confused as Sora usually is. Roxas being confused in this unusual situation is quite natural and sadly being confused can lead to making mistakes.

Oh that's nice tease, can't wait to see it. So 3 more chapters to go until Xion's debut? I am looking forward to it. Especially because she's the last of the main cast to need to appear, also I think her situation is quite an interesting one.
Yeah I kind of realized he took the more dangerous route because it looked like it was saver in other regards. This as you said makes sense after all he is in a hurry so he probably didn't have that much time to make a rational decision. Also Roxas like Sora seems to be someone who's more likely to act on instinct, especially in a high stress situation.
 

Sephiroth0812

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 43 posted)

Well calm usually brings a certain amount of slowness with it. Well in the KH universe time is relative as a whole. Every world has it's own time flow, I guess this is even more true to the "world" within ones heart. Even if the ray was going in a consistent speed they should have realized that they had to hurry, after all they know nothing about the ray other than it's dangerous, but that's nitpicking, especially considering it's a realistic error for people in their situation to make.

Oh this sounds promising especially considering what's about to happen to Roxas.

So Roxas and Ventus kind of meet inside of the dream of Ventus' heart? Or am I getting the wrong idea?

Well Roxas typically is confused, sure not as confused as Sora usually is. Roxas being confused in this unusual situation is quite natural and sadly being confused can lead to making mistakes.

Oh that's nice tease, can't wait to see it. So 3 more chapters to go until Xion's debut? I am looking forward to it. Especially because she's the last of the main cast to need to appear, also I think her situation is quite an interesting one.
Yeah I kind of realized he took the more dangerous route because it looked like it was saver in other regards. This as you said makes sense after all he is in a hurry so he probably didn't have that much time to make a rational decision. Also Roxas like Sora seems to be someone who's more likely to act on instinct, especially in a high stress situation.

That's of course true, and it surely has also partly to do with Roxas being able to be fascinated by little things like Ven's projected form regaining the shoe (proving that the status of Ven's "body" really reflects the current state of his heart) or the actual look of Ven's heart when outside like a little kid, which he still is in some way.
So yeah, Roxas realized the urgency, but nevertheless let get himself distracted for a short while and Ventus didn't actually help things by engaging in the conversation instead of urging Roxas to hurry.
Or in short, they both get involved in a short situation of lightheartedness which they choose to enjoy instead of hurrying up. ;P

I sure hope it will somewhat tug at the reader's heartstrings, especially since I had to research much of the actual game scripts of the KH series for the following sequences.

I guess you can put it that way. When Roxas entered Ventus' heart with all the destroyed platforms, he was in "Ven's territory" so to speak, an that allows their consciousnesses to interact directly, when Roxas is in Sora's heart, there is no direct connection with Ven's consciousness (since his heart sleeps) so they can only communicate through a mental link.

Yeah, lol, one of the differences is also that when Sora gets something explained, he often still doesn't understand ("most of this is over my head" -o-tone of Sora in the games) while Roxas is a bit sharper and can understand things better when they are explained. But since here is nothing explained right now the confusion is pretty big.

Yep, although the menace will be introduced a bit earlier through other means than appearing as a person. I have deliberately chosen Xion as the last one to be revealed. Not because she is more important as the others, but because of her situation which doesn't allow a different approach.
Exactly, I guess if you would put Riku in the same position he would probably take the downward walkway without walking it fully, only to bring a height difference between himself and the ray to see if it is really directed. Because if it is, the ray would bent downward to your level. Roxas did think about the left-and-right option in his hurry, but not about the up-and-down possibility too.
Still though, it would depend on if Riku could keep his calm, which Roxas right now certainly cannot, or rather, cannot to a degree that would allow him to make these decisions I pointed out above.
Roxas is certainly not in panic or overly afraid, but he's also not as calm and analyzing as he normally could manage.
 

AdrianXXII

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 43 posted)

That's of course true, and it surely has also partly to do with Roxas being able to be fascinated by little things like Ven's projected form regaining the shoe (proving that the status of Ven's "body" really reflects the current state of his heart) or the actual look of Ven's heart when outside like a little kid, which he still is in some way.
So yeah, Roxas realized the urgency, but nevertheless let get himself distracted for a short while and Ventus didn't actually help things by engaging in the conversation instead of urging Roxas to hurry.
Or in short, they both get involved in a short situation of lightheartedness which they choose to enjoy instead of hurrying up. ;P

So that's how it is. xD

I sure hope it will somewhat tug at the reader's heartstrings, especially since I had to research much of the actual game scripts of the KH series for the following sequences.

I'm pretty sure what ever happens to Roxas will pull on the heartstrings of you're readers, seeing I can't imagine it going to well for our poor Blondie.

I guess you can put it that way. When Roxas entered Ventus' heart with all the destroyed platforms, he was in "Ven's territory" so to speak, an that allows their consciousnesses to interact directly, when Roxas is in Sora's heart, there is no direct connection with Ven's consciousness (since his heart sleeps) so they can only communicate through a mental link.

Well considering how little we know of how hearts are present within another while they sleep this is a valid possibility and it does make sense.

Yeah, lol, one of the differences is also that when Sora gets something explained, he often still doesn't understand ("most of this is over my head" -o-tone of Sora in the games) while Roxas is a bit sharper and can understand things better when they are explained. But since here is nothing explained right now the confusion is pretty big.

Yeah, Roxas is definitely the sharper one of the two. He also tends to take the time and think about things and ask questions, two things Sora doesn't do two often.

Yep, although the menace will be introduced a bit earlier through other means than appearing as a person. I have deliberately chosen Xion as the last one to be revealed. Not because she is more important as the others, but because of her situation which doesn't allow a different approach.
Exactly, I guess if you would put Riku in the same position he would probably take the downward walkway without walking it fully, only to bring a height difference between himself and the ray to see if it is really directed. Because if it is, the ray would bent downward to your level. Roxas did think about the left-and-right option in his hurry, but not about the up-and-down possibility too.
Still though, it would depend on if Riku could keep his calm, which Roxas right now certainly cannot, or rather, cannot to a degree that would allow him to make these decisions I pointed out above.
Roxas is certainly not in panic or overly afraid, but he's also not as calm and analyzing as he normally could manage.

I'm really exited to seeing this.
I think Riku has, by this point, gained enough experience to make good on the fly decisions, also the fact that he's level headed and a thinker help in this regard.
Considering Roxas' current situation it's understandable that he's not really all that calm and makes some mistakes, though this one will cost him dearly.
 

Sephiroth0812

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 43 posted)

So that's how it is. xD
Yep, they're taking each opportunity to have a positive experience.

I'm pretty sure what ever happens to Roxas will pull on the heartstrings of you're readers, seeing I can't imagine it going to well for our poor Blondie.
Heh, I won't spoil anything on that though, in two weeks we'll see it. ;P

Well considering how little we know of how hearts are present within another while they sleep this is a valid possibility and it does make sense.
Indeed, and considering this is a fanwork I can also take a bit literary freedom, lol.

Yeah, Roxas is definitely the sharper one of the two. He also tends to take the time and think about things and ask questions, two things Sora doesn't do two often.
The time to thoroughly think about things is the thing that is not available right now though, so that adds to the problem. ;)

I'm really exited to seeing this.
I think Riku has, by this point, gained enough experience to make good on the fly decisions, also the fact that he's level headed and a thinker help in this regard.
Considering Roxas' current situation it's understandable that he's not really all that calm and makes some mistakes, though this one will cost him dearly.
[/QUOTE]

Hehe, good. ^__^
I guess one thing is also that Riku has much more experience than Roxas has and he is also a different type of personality than either Roxas, Ven and Sora are.
That's correct, although what the consequences are I won't go into any detail yet.
 

Sephiroth0812

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 43 posted)

Let's go with the next chapter in line.
This might be the heaviest chapter to date in terms of emotional impact and we also get to hear at least the menace's voice for the first time.

#####
XLIV. Overflow of Agony

Roxas! What are you doing?


Ven's screeching, terrified voice sounded unnaturally high and unsettling in Roxas' mind, but he let his own mental image only form a small affectionate smile.

Keeping you out of harm's way, as promised.

These words triggered another memory inside the wounded boy as an image of Aqua came up in his mind.
"Let me go with you, Aqua." He heard his own voice plead.
"No, Ven. Do as I say and go home." She spoke in a somewhat strict manner.

"Why won't you let me?"
Ven's echo said disappointed inside the memory.

"I don't want to put you in harm's way..."
Her voice softened as she reached out as if to put her hand on Ven's shoulder.
"...you understand?"

The memory faded and Ventus felt his own breath increasing, his bare skin rubbing against the leather of his improvised blanket as the pace of the raising and lowering of his chest got faster.
"I understand, but that doesn't mean I have to accept it!!!" He yelled out in frustration, more directed at his twin-in-looks.

Roxas could only faintly hear Ven's second outburst, all his senses now exploding into a rush of pain as the energy ray hit him from the right side.
Aaagh...what is this? Uuuh. It feels like dozens of icicles are rammed through my chest...

Despite trembling more due to the agonizing feelings, he stubbornly held his arms up and Ven's heart firmly out of reach for the energy ray which was continuously running through his torso.
Hff, hfff, it hurts so much...it's as if my form is going to explode, my mind nearly snapping...
"Aaargh!"
Roxas couldn't suppress it anymore and screamed out in pain, his urge to fall to his knees and press his hand against his own chest increasing.
No...can't afford to subject Ven's heart to this...he would break completely...uuh.

Continuing to scream as he squirmed in agony, he also felt his eyes slowly get watery, wondering just how much longer he could endure this excruciating ordeal.
Suddenly, faint voices coming apparently from inside the ray could be heard, freaking the young Nobody out even more.
What? No, not such things on top too...aah, my chest, my head...it's as if something freezed them and is now squeezing and stabbing at the same time...

The first clearer hearable voice was a deep male one.
["No... I succumbed to it. Just like when I stole Princess Aurora's heart of light. I can never return home now. I'm a failure."]

The statement drove another spike of pain right into Roxas' head, causing him to cringe and howl again.
Not a single pause was granted as the next eerie voice fragment crashed into him.
["If I didn't obey, he said I'd be locked in this castle forever. I've been alone for so long..."]
Namine...that is for sure Nami...aaargh.

The next voice shouting was definitely also female, but he couldn't say to whom it belonged.
["Terra, please! Listen! The Master has no reason to distrust you, really! He was just worried."]

Next were Namine and that unknown man again.
["No. Sora forgave me even when I deceived him. So how could I destroy his heart? There's no way! I don't care what happens to me. I won't hurt Sora! I won't do it!"]
["No, stop! My friend gave me that!"]

Each single sentence brought Roxas another bout of increased pain, him holding out solely due to his strong will and resolve to shield Ven's heart from all this.
Three more quotes of the unknown female voice came rushing past in quick succession, causing him to nearly clench his hands to fists.
["Terra... Ven... I hope we're ready for the storm that's coming."]
["No! That's absurd! Terra would never!"]
["Shut up! I'm sick of your nonsense! Give Ven his heart back!"]

In the last moment he remembered that he would crush Ven's heart with such an action and bit his lip instead, an unsettling moan escaping his mouth as he struggled on to cope with the torture.
Give...Ven...his...heart...back? Guuhh...

Quantity and pace of the spoken snippets both increased the longer the ray rushed through his memory-based form, nearly driving the boy mad.

The next four being divided between two of the unknown man with the deep voice again and two of a third female voice, similar to Namine's but still different.
["Funny... This whole time I've been telling myself I want to be stronger, more independent... But the second I let my heart do the talking... I find out how little I really know myself. And how much I miss them."]
["Ven, Aqua... I'll find some way to make things right."]

["He's wrong. It's not a sham...and neither am I."]
["I'm sorry, but...I can't go with you. It's my friends--they need me. And I need them, too."]
No, stop...what in all worlds is this...?

Meanwhile, Ventus saw in their mental connection how Roxas was squirming and suffering outside, his own emotional state worsening with every second he had to watch this.
Knowing that his "twin" did all this to protect him because he was so vulnerable increased the saddened and frustrated feelings of the boy, which in turn caused the pain of his wounded heart to soar up again, adding to his fear.
No, no, no, please heart...uuuh, hold on. I can't let him just suffer there, just because of me! I have to...do something!
Trying his hardest to cope with the increasing pain Ven threw himself around in his improvised "bed", burying his face in Roxas' white, red collared overjacket as a new pain seizure gripped him.
Giiyah...I will not let you keep me down anymore, pain! I will...help him...

Biting into the fabric of the jacket, Ventus struggled hard to lift his projected body up, his left hand pressed tightly on the glass floor to help pushing him up while the right was another time placed firmly on the left side of his bare chest.
Groaning because of the high effort he continued stubbornly to try and move his shivering figure, more pain seizures causing additional coughing fits and some low sobbing, which made the blonde increasingly more angry with himself.
All this, this goddamn crippling pain only because of that dreaded, stupid weapon my heart was used as an ingredient for!

It was now like Ven could feel the aching of every wound his crippled heart still had, his emotional state nearly overexerting its limits right another time. Stiffening with a pained yelp he collapsed back into the lying position, kicking the air with one leg in a fit of annoyance, the black coat removed from his body completely in the process.
Far from giving up he stubbornly wiped away the upcoming tears with the left hand. The sobbing nearly overplayed by angry snarling like a dog, Ventus tried to get up another time, the right hand pressed so hard against his chest that it left some red marks on the skin.
As he remembered his slight ambidextrous ability he summoned his Wayward Wind with the left hand, plunging it harshly into the stained glass floor in order to use it as support to pull himself up.
Ghh...it hurts so much, but even if I undo all the recuperation I managed to make, I will assist Roxas against this weird attack.

Outside, Roxas felt Ven's heart getting warmer inside his outstretched hands and due to their mental link he could vaguely see through the veil of his own pain how Ven was struggling to come to his aid.
Ven! No, don't do this...you'll increase the pain of your heart! I...I am sure the attack is over soon...I can hold on for some more.
This pledge wasn't brought up very convincingly in the other boy's head though as Roxas' voice sounded shaky and pressed.

["No... +Uh!+ I'll keep him safe--until he wakes. Forever if I have to."]
This was again the second female voice speaking, sounding sad, but determined.
["Master! What are you..."]
Roxas' eyes widened in shock, not at the intensity of the new pain burst, but the new voice in the mix.
That's, That's Ven's voice...!?
["Please don't do this, Master. I'm not strong enough."]
Ven's voice sounded pleading and fearful, notably higher than usual.
"Aarrgh!" The young Nobody let out another pained scream, but this time in unison with the real Ventus who he essentially held in his hands.

He struggled on against the painful waves in his mind, hearing Ven sniffling through their mental link.
These? That thing even uses some of my worst memories? The wounded boy whispered meekly in Roxas' thoughts.
These quotes are...from memories? Ugh...
Another rush of pain emerged as two more quotes of the unknown man with the deep voice came along.
["You may be my Master. But I will not...let you hurt my friend!"]
["+Uh+ What have I done... Master... I just...wanted to keep Ven safe."]

This is...such a horrible torture. You must move out of the way of that beam! Ven screeched.
I can't. It's still about six metres to the next platform and the walkway is too narrow! Roxas sounded almost desperate, he wanted this ordeal to end, but not if it would mean that Ven had to overexert his injured heart again.
Another quote rushed past, this time from Namine again.
["It's too late either way. His awakening will have to be delayed. I never imagined Sora's Nobody and the other one would fight so hard to be their own people. Unfortunately, the only real solution...is for them both to go away."]
Realizing this pertained to himself, Roxas couldn't hold back the tears anymore, one flowing down his entire right cheek.

["Such a terrible...darkness... Fight it. Terra, please!"]
The second female voice was it again.
Torment over torment, what IS this attack? The young Nobody faltered, continuosly trembling heavily.

["I still don't know exactly what it is. But...it scares me to death. Even just the thought of it."]
Ven...no, what was done to you? Roxas pressed his eyes shut, groaning as a second and third tear slipped out of both his eyes.

["Oh my, I didn't expect you to step right into the way of my beam, but that is actually a neat development, Roxy. Finally you adhere to your purpose here!"]
This new voice came thundering into both boys heads like a chilling ice storm, causing them both to yelp in agony with nearly identical voices.
Who...who are you? Why do you know me? What purpose?
Roxas' questions had a certain vibe of uneasiness but also an angry undertone.

Hearing the twin-scream the voice lowly chuckled. ["So Venny's there as well? What a surprise..."]
Don't divert! Why do you agonize me like this? What purpose do you mean? Roxas interjected with a hiss.

["Tsk, tsk, still the defiant one, huh? I'll teach you to be more subservient!"]
More quotes flowed through the still continuous beam into Roxas, rocking his memory-based body with additional pain bursts.
["Ven, Aqua...I won't let him hurt you."]
["You will pay, Xehanort! Was my Master--no, my father, Eraqus not enough for you? Leave my friends alone!"]
["Aqua, Ven... One day I will set this right."]

Another pained scream of the boy holding Ven's heart followed, but that was apparently not enough for the cold voice.

["I just...want these days to last forever. Hanging out, the ice cream, the sunsets..."]
["It's scary to think I could lose you guys."]
["If I had a heart, you think I could love somebody?"]
No...these are my own...
"STOP! STOP IT!" Roxas shook is head repeatedly in despair, the pain becoming nearly unbearable.

#####

Needless to say that it was pretty difficult for me to write this, but it's necessary for the purpose of the narrative.
 
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SRKTAVRXAYGDM

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 43 posted)

SO. INTENSE. Seriously, I've just been catching up and I already can't wait for the next chapter!

I wonder who could be feeding of Sora's heart like THAT....
 

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

It became quite emotional for me in a few parts, Sephy. Ventus, has the right idea in mind to help Roxas; in his weaken state, he has no choice but, to watch him suffer. It was nicely written, adding in those memories. A few I'm fuzzy on. I'm impressed with the menace's voice, it almost reminds me of Vanitas. Same attitude and sadist whims. I think the memory that struck me most was when Ventus master had hurt him or Aqua trying to protect him. Excited to see the next chapter already. :D
 

Sephiroth0812

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

SO. INTENSE. Seriously, I've just been catching up and I already can't wait for the next chapter!

I wonder who could be feeding of Sora's heart like THAT....

Oh hi, nice to hear from another reader. ^__^

Glad you like it so far, the intensity is surely building up as we're getting to the core of many of the current problems now.

It will become clear in two or three chapters, there is also to consider though that the menace is also feeding off Roxas and Ventus.

It became quite emotional for me in a few parts, Sephy. Ventus, has the right idea in mind to help Roxas; in his weaken state, he has no choice but, to watch him suffer. It was nicely written, adding in those memories. A few I'm fuzzy on. I'm impressed with the menace's voice, it almost reminds me of Vanitas. Same attitude and sadist whims. I think the memory that struck me most was when Ventus master had hurt him or Aqua trying to protect him. Excited to see the next chapter already. :D

Great, then I did something right with how I wrote this chapter.
Heh, that would be probably the right course of action to do, but right now Ventus is frantically trying to ignore his weakened status and struggles to stand up in his heart to somehow help Roxas.
Ventus said:
Ghh...it hurts so much, but even if I undo all the recuperation I managed to make, I will assist Roxas against this weird attack.
Right now, Ven cares little about his own safety.

I can ensure you that each and everyone of those "torment"-quotes/memories is taken straight out of the KH games themselves from KH 1 till Coded, I didn't make a single one up here. ;)

Regarding the menace's voice, this may be because its stance is similar to Vanitas, or should I say, worse than Vanitas?

That the voice is always written in bold font indicates its volume, as it's always thundering loud and only hearable inside the mind. If you want to imagine how it feels for Roxas and Ven to hear that voice, think of someone using a megaphone but holding it right to your ear then yelling into it.

I'm not too surprised about that, as I took these from some of the most emotional scenes of Birth by Sleep.
 

Roxie1563

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

Wow.. What an intense chapter! :O This was well written, sephy as usual. :)

I can kind of feel their pain as the snippets of memories flowing throughout Roxas and Ven.. :( So sad!

As for the voice, I have to agree with Kat: it does sounds like Vanitas as he usually does some dark witty lines about Ven, Aqua or Terra, but Vanitas doesn't know of Roxas, so I assume it must be either Xigbar or Larxene.. I could be wrong in the next few chapters, lol.

I can't wait for the next chapter, friend! :D Oh, it was me that sent the new reader to you. ^_^ I merely suggested to her that she read your story and now she's hooked. xD
 

SRKTAVRXAYGDM

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

I can't wait for the next chapter, friend! :D Oh, it was me that sent the new reader to you. ^_^ I merely suggested to her that she read your story and now she's hooked. xD

Hah! Taking the credit for yourself, eh? Don't worry, I'm kidding. You have my not–so–formal gratitude.:D
 

Roxie1563

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

Hah! Taking the credit for yourself, eh? Don't worry, I'm kidding. You have my not–so–formal gratitude.:D

Haha! I just wanted him to know it was me that sent you to the story.. ^-^ And I accept your not-so-formal gratitude. xD
 

Sephiroth0812

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

Wow.. What an intense chapter! :O This was well written, sephy as usual. :)

I can kind of feel their pain as the snippets of memories flowing throughout Roxas and Ven.. :( So sad!

As for the voice, I have to agree with Kat: it does sounds like Vanitas as he usually does some dark witty lines about Ven, Aqua or Terra, but Vanitas doesn't know of Roxas, so I assume it must be either Xigbar or Larxene.. I could be wrong in the next few chapters, lol.

I can't wait for the next chapter, friend! :D Oh, it was me that sent the new reader to you. ^_^ I merely suggested to her that she read your story and now she's hooked. xD

To be honest this chapter took me quite some of work even before writing it because I had to search through the complete dialogue of KH 1, CoM, Days, KH 2, BBS and Coded in order to collect the quotes I used for the "mental torture"-attack, so hearing things like these makes that work pay off even more. ;)

It's indeed a horrible situation, although right now Roxas has to bear the brunt of it. The pain Ven feels is more due to him trying everything to help Roxas and ignoring his injured heart's wounds for it. That's why I said earlier that Ven recuperating a bit during the time he slept and Roxas was with him is important.
This effort Ven does right now would not be possible without it.

Then there is of course also to keep in mind how everything that transpires right now affects Sora.

Yea, but well, we already know that it cannot be Vanitas himself, although the way the menace acts and operates may give a hint at its origin, as does the facts that it knows both Roxas and Ventus, as it calls them both by name.

Oh, so that's it. Alrighty, if she was hooked to it by looking at it per chance or per recommendation, the end result is what counts. ^__^
I'm happy about any way readers are introduced to the story. ;D
 

KingdomKey

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

Great, then I did something right with how I wrote this chapter.
Heh, that would be probably the right course of action to do, but right now Ventus is frantically trying to ignore his weakened status and struggles to stand up in his heart to somehow help Roxas.

Right now, Ven cares little about his own safety.

I can ensure you that each and everyone of those "torment"-quotes/memories is taken straight out of the KH games themselves from KH 1 till Coded, I didn't make a single one up here. ;)

Regarding the menace's voice, this may be because its stance is similar to Vanitas, or should I say, worse than Vanitas?

That the voice is always written in bold font indicates its volume, as it's always thundering loud and only hearable inside the mind. If you want to imagine how it feels for Roxas and Ven to hear that voice, think of someone using a megaphone but holding it right to your ear then yelling into it.

I'm not too surprised about that, as I took these from some of the most emotional scenes of Birth by Sleep.

Yup, you did marvelously as always, Sephy.

True. However, Ventus is probably making the situation worse rather than better. Causing concern for Roxas and hurting himself on the process.

I'm impressed at the length you went through to get each tormented memory and quote it in here. ;)

Actually, I should of rephrased it like this: The menace has almost a direct link to Vanitas, naturally it would sound much more intimating or sinister like him; just on a worse scale as you put it. I gotta say ouch at the volume it speaks in, sort of feel bad for Roxas and Ventus to endure such volume. :3
 

Zero Dozer

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

Oh my god. Roxas is entering a memory overdrive. MEMORIES OF ALL PEOPLE. Naminé's memories. Terra's memories. Aqua's memories. Ventus' own memories as well as Roxas'.

Who the hell is that guy? How does he have access to so many memories??? And how the hell did I get so late in reading this FANTASTIC chapter??????

My hint about the guy? He was a XIII. I know at least some members that knew both Roxas and Ventus in the past and still didn't appear. Like Dilan.

Another kick at it would be Master Xehanort himself, but... Isn't he at that dead world at this moment?
 

Sephiroth0812

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

Yup, you did marvelously as always, Sephy.

True. However, Ventus is probably making the situation worse rather than better. Causing concern for Roxas and hurting himself on the process.

I'm impressed at the length you went through to get each tormented memory and quote it in here. ;)

Actually, I should of rephrased it like this: The menace has almost a direct link to Vanitas, naturally it would sound much more intimating or sinister like him; just on a worse scale as you put it. I gotta say ouch at the volume it speaks in, sort of feel bad for Roxas and Ventus to endure such volume. :3

Seeing those reactions to the chapter really makes me a happy camper, lol. <3

Yep, yep, definitely. Which consequences Ventus' efforts will have we'll see in the next chapter. As the situation is right now, there are two main issues to consider:
1st Roxas needs to somehow get out of that continuos beam that rushes through his chest since he won't be able to endure all that mental torture forever even with his strong will.
2nd Ventus' heart being not in the beam itself shields it from its effect, however Ven's own actions serve to endanger it, so whatever Ven plans to do to help Roxas he will have to do it fast before all the recuperation he managed to achieve is undone, as well as Roxas will have to react fast in order to seize an opportunity.

It was quite a chore of work really, but I figured it might give the whole situation some more "wham" and might have a bigger effect than if I had just chosen to make some quotes up or change the beam into something that causes only physical pain.
Of course, there are then also the hidden hints towards who is the one that is shooting that beam the whole time. ;)

Yep, that's because they actually have a direct link due to Vanitas essentially CREATING the menace in the first place. They work together and are sort of "partners", but they're of course being far from anything resembling friends. I can only shiver when thinking about such a volume directly in my head, for Roxas even more than Ven since he has also the torture-beam to deal with.

Oh my god. Roxas is entering a memory overdrive. MEMORIES OF ALL PEOPLE. Naminé's memories. Terra's memories. Aqua's memories. Ventus' own memories as well as Roxas'.

Who the hell is that guy? How does he have access to so many memories??? And how the hell did I get so late in reading this FANTASTIC chapter??????

My hint about the guy? He was a XIII. I know at least some members that knew both Roxas and Ventus in the past and still didn't appear. Like Dilan.

Another kick at it would be Master Xehanort himself, but... Isn't he at that dead world at this moment?

And Xion's as well, yep. And they're all memories about suffering, torment and plain pain.

That the menace has access to so many memories as well as knowing both Roxas and Ven (and Vanitas, for that matter) may actually be another hint at its identity. The secret will be lifted in chapter 46, although the next one may provide some more clues already.

Dilan, according to Even when he talked to Rudol, is currently busy infiltrating the palace of Agrabah, also how would he have access to memories of Ven, Roxas, Xion, Terra, Aqua and Naminé?

This creature is working together with Vanitas, so much I can already say, as well as that while it isn't Master Xehanort himself nor has he any control about the events, he vaguely knows about what is happening and lets it proceed.
Yep, MX himself is at the Stronghold of Ruin physically, while on the heart-layer he's busy having a dispute with Terra and Eraqus.
 

AdrianXXII

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

Great chapter. Really nicely written. I imagine it was quite a bit of work and effort to find the right lines to quote, but you really chose good ones for the story. I really like the concept of the beam, I find it quite interesting and unexpected. It's also very interesting that all the memories we hear are only from people that are in torment and connected to Sora.

Wow this chapter offered quite a few hints to who the Villain could be, though I honestly still can't say for sure. I feel like I should know who it is now, but I'm still really unsure.

Poor blondies, they're both going through yet another painful ordeal, though Ven's is self inflicted. Ven pushing himself to try and help Roxas is very typical for him, but it definetly wont do him much good. I just hope he makes it out without hurting himself too badly.
 

Zero Dozer

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

Ven manages to be some kamikaze sometimes. I'm still trying to connect the dots.

Another thing that I remembered is that Larxene and Marluxia didn't appear yet, though they don't seem connected to Ventus and company.

Hmm... Maybe Maleficent? Nah, it seems that this side of things is from that "fourth side" you are yet to show us.
 

Sephiroth0812

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Re: Kingdom Hearts: Hearts in Unison (Chapter 44 posted)

Great chapter. Really nicely written. I imagine it was quite a bit of work and effort to find the right lines to quote, but you really chose good ones for the story. I really like the concept of the beam, I find it quite interesting and unexpected. It's also very interesting that all the memories we hear are only from people that are in torment and connected to Sora.

Wow this chapter offered quite a few hints to who the Villain could be, though I honestly still can't say for sure. I feel like I should know who it is now, but I'm still really unsure.

Poor blondies, they're both going through yet another painful ordeal, though Ven's is self inflicted. Ven pushing himself to try and help Roxas is very typical for him, but it definetly wont do him much good. I just hope he makes it out without hurting himself too badly.

Yep yep, it was quite the piece of work, but all this praise makes up for it. ^__^
As for the concept of the beam, I thought it might have a bigger impact than physical torture and fits more the "heart-plane" of existence all this happens in.
That only these memories are chosen does have a reason though, and its tied to the identity of the menace.

It's really something, lol, I realize that once the menace is revealed people may slap their foreheads and say "of course, why didn't I realize it earlier". *ggg*

Indeed, although they are two of the tormented anyways, increasing their suffering is partly intentional, it won't be long until it's understandable why.

I actually put quite some thought into why Ventus acts like this.
Of course he has always the pain from his maimed heart, but as he confessed to Roxas, he can endure it on normal levels fine, the main reason Ven is flipping out like that right now is because of the issues he also had during BBS, that's why Roxas' statement about "keeping him out of harms way" triggered the memory about his conversation with Aqua at Radiant Garden.
It annoys Ven when he's always the one who has to be protected as well when he's nearly helpless. While Roxas may react to the feelings of helplessness with anger and emotional outbursts, Ven reacts with stubbornness and impulsive actions like the one he's trying right now.
In part it's also because he wants to prove to Roxas that he isn't just a helpless kid (despite his status indicating otherwise). Then there's the desire to pay back the help Roxas has already given him by helping him to recuperate a bit and keeping his heart out of the beam.
Another reason, although more subtle, is fear to fail a friend, since Ven doesn't know if his sacrifice at the end of BBS actually saved Aqua and Terra or not, he does not want to take a risk with Roxas.

Last but not least there is definitely the blatant fact that the current situation cannot remain like this. The pain bursts Roxas experiences prevent him from moving, but remaining there may eventually crush Roxas' mind or let him at least faint from the pressure as he certainly can't endure this for too long. So Roxas needs some reprieve from the torture at least for a short time in order to try and move out of the beam.

Ven manages to be some kamikaze sometimes. I'm still trying to connect the dots.

Another thing that I remembered is that Larxene and Marluxia didn't appear yet, though they don't seem connected to Ventus and company.

Hmm... Maybe Maleficent? Nah, it seems that this side of things is from that "fourth side" you are yet to show us.

Yep, but as Adrian said I think that's within his character, anything to save a friend seems to be one of his mottos and he's selfless enough to pull something like that.

That's right, you would also want to think about how Larxene or Marluxia could have access to all those memories and the emotions attached to them that Roxas gets bombarded with right now.

The fourth faction are actually the Order Preservers which Lightning and Hope are part of. Vanitas and the menace are allied, but they aren't part of any faction, just like Sephiroth.
 
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