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Nebula Zero

THE GREATEST ATTACK EVER
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Yeah, I know. I'm up to no good with this. Oh well, we'll see how it goes :3




Chapter 1: Can't Break My Swag


Now, I know what you're thinking.

What the hell am I doing back here, narrating for your sorry asses again. Quite frankly, there were several auditions I made to take my place, and well to be frank, they all sucked the donkey genitals. One was too formal, one sounded like Jerry Springer's lovechild, so on and so forth. All in all, they just can't do what I do. I know, call it a superiority complex, but that's how I roll. Ah, it feels good to say that again. So on that note, tossing out those haters and crapping on their front porches, I present another devious tale of my own making.

Rewind back, you're probably like 'wtf mang, i thought this was a sequel', and in technicality it is. So I'm going to paint a picture for all of you. They win, bad guy explodes into several colored explosions, Atlas gets laid(finally), Caleb goes to pursue a rapping career, and my pants are finally on. Man, I'm just total buzzkill, ain't I? Like I said in the (anti)climactic ending, I can't be bothered narrating that stuff. Too much of a load on my hands.

On that note, let me get you to the here and now.

NZ is doing your average clan mission, solo. He can do that now since well, he's on the A-List of KHIvalice now. Everyone else is off doing their own thing, and found their hands too occupied with their own balls-er, I mean business. It was to be a simple mission. Gather a herb so it can be brought back to make medicine for an ailing citizen. Well, it WAS supposed to be easy. But since when do I ever make things easy for this bastard? Not starting here. Anyways..

"Here it is.." he said, picking it up. It didn't really look like a herb. It resembled more of a flower than anything. But a ripple caught his eye, beyond the miniscule details of the herb. It wasn't a ripple in the water, otherwise it wouldn't have caught his attention. That and I don't think he's still that daft as when we first saw him.

It was a ripple in the ground.

I'm talking space-time crap, although it's probably nothing new to NZ, but still astounded him nevertheless. A small ringing in his ears, the Swordsman having his weapon at the ready, uncertain about what was to happen. As the ringing slowly grew in pitch and volume, something else came to be heard. A voice.

Brave warrior, I request your aid.

"Why don't you go bother Sora or something?! Leave me alone!"


Sorry, can't do that. And Sora is a tool anyways.​


"What do you mean aid?"


You must fight for me, and stuff.​


"Great. Off to another adventure. What about my clan?"


I'm sorry, but I'm requesting only you. Maybe they might show up, as an unlockable or something.​


"An unlockawhat?"


...Nevermind. Just brace yourself.​

And the ripple expanded, surrounding and enveloping NZ in a pitch black abyss. And in the center, a ball of light rose from the abyss. NZ expected a "Hey! Listen!" but found it was more so an inanimate object, from the looks of it. He grabbed it, as it took solid form in his hands. It was shaped like a shield crest, with a sword and what seemed to be pedobear as the face on the shield. It was in a red, crystalline form.

This is your world's crystal. This will get you back home again.​

"Who are you?"

They call me, jeels.​

"Oh shi-"

And with that, he plunged into the abyss, off into god knows what for an adventure. I think he's pretty boned.

I'M BACK, MOFACKOS, and so is NZ. And this time he's going solo into another adventure, or is he?! What will become of him? Why in the sam hell am I making cliffhangers yet again?!!? God, I'm such a bastard. The party don't start until the next chapter walks in! Stay tuned!
 
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Nebula Zero

THE GREATEST ATTACK EVER
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Lolz.


Chapter 2: It's Go Time...FOR REAL


N e b u l a Z e r o
[To The Skies!]

Graceful and deadly in midair combat.​


"Wake up!"

NZ awoke on a somewhat ethereal boat, nearly transparent and shone in the light. He was greeted by a 16 year old boy clad in black and red, wearing poofy pants and had a strange fixation for belts. His most predominant feature was his big, yellow clown shoes. His generic brown spiky hair waved back and forth in the wind, uncompromised by anything.

"Nice to meet you. I'm Sora."

"...You've got to be kidding me."

S o r a
[Keyblade Master]

Master of a strange and unpredictable weapon.​

"You've heard of me before?"

"...Sort of. So I take it you've been summoned to fight as well?"

"Yes! I'm going to bring peace and justice!"

"...Wanker."

"What?"

NZ scoffed and looked out into the distance. Even the water they floated above looked unreal. It looked too perfect. But in the distance he saw other boats, all going in the same direction. An island, seemingly made out of crystal stood out over yonder. A ghostly white in color, the island was obviously not naturally made, the Swordsman thought to himself. Wow NZ's observations are so profound, he's like Sherlock Holmes. Or an asian Robert Downey Jr. But who am I to say anything? A ridiculously deep voice echoed throughout the land, like a sort of Narrator kind of authority. But he ain't got nothing on me.

A land, forged by the gods.
A war between two opposing forces.
Jeels, entity for good and all that is righteous.
And Endgame, avatar of anarchy and chaos.
With both sides coming to a neverending draw,
They called upon warriors from distant realms,
To change the tide of the war...

Their boat made it to shore, the ground as hard as marble. NZ unsheathed his weapon, while Sora's strange weapon suddenly appeared in his hands. It was a new sight for him, seeing an actual Keyblade. The strangest weapon to see, mainly for the fact that it resembled more of a giant bludgeoning tool than anything. Which was why the term 'blade' seemed unnecessary.

"NZ! Is that you?" said a familiar voice. He turned to find it was none other than Ulti. However she did not don her Judge armor, and thus had her own distinct adventurer look and feel. Ulti had a similar sort of fashion sense to Sora's, except without the outrageous pants and shoes, and like to dress herself in green and blue. She was accompanied by an unknown person. He had white hair and wore a red trenchcoat. His bastard sword on his back was most intimidating.

"Ulti! Who's that guy? He looks kind of homosexual if you ask me."

"Mind your tongue. The name is Dante." he said in a nonchalant tone. So he's not gay, but more so a douchebag. Excellent.

U l t i
[Might & Magic]

With Keyblade and sword, her combination of magic and attacks make her well-balanced.​


D a n t e
[Jackpot!]

With a demonic arsenal of weapons at his disposal, his attack combonations are endless.​

"Well Dante, I hope you're not all show, because I think someone is headed our way..!" NZ said, pointing out ahead. But when his enemy came into view, he could not believe his eyes. His enemy was one he had recently defeated: Dorian Gray. NZ gripped his sword tight, almost in seething anger. Oh c'mon, the battle wasn't that hard the first time around. I would know. But I'm just too lazy to talk about it.

D o r i a n G r a y
[Magick-Versed]

Uses a large variety of Magick to disable and brutally punish his opponents.​

"Did you miss me?" Dorian said with a slight manaical chuckle.

"I'm gonna finish you off for good!" said NZ, charging recklessly.

What will happen to NZ, charging off into battle?! Who are the other heroes summoned by jeels, and the ones summoned by Endgame, who are there to stop them at every step of the way? What kind of unlockable characters will there be?! Am I getting a x5 EXP multiplier for this battle?!?! I'm checking my chocobo play plan, next chapter!
 
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Swag

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I love it.

I better be in this one to, can't have KHIvalice without it's token pothead black guy.
 

Urbane

Who in face are you?!
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This is not nostalgic for me at all.

However, that doesn't keep me from loving it.
 

Nebula Zero

THE GREATEST ATTACK EVER
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Chapter 3: FINISH HIM!

"I'll show you how I roll!"

"I don't intend to die this time.."


The battle started, and NZ seemed a little confused. He found that he wasn't playing a turn-based battle. He found that he could actually move in real-time, and his moves were dictated by button combinations! Well, I told ya he was screwed. What did I tell you? Looks like someone should've read that manual. Going into cross-realms and stuff not thinking the battle system might change on him. Tsk tsk.

"Um, Narrator..mind helping me out here..?"

Well, this is new. You're actually asking ME for help? Well slap my balls and call me Sally.

"Can it be tutorial teim?!"

Alright, alright. Basically, think of it as playing Street Fighter, except with more seizure-inducing moves and and more flamboyant characters, as you saw with Sora. Moving on, how much damage you inflict is based on your BRAVE points. Your BRAVE attacks steal points from your enemy and gives you some. Then when you feel like you've accumalated enough, you can perform an HP attack to lower their HP until they're six feet underground. Wash, rinse, repeat. Got it?

"..Thanks."

Yeah, yeah. Next time read the damn manual.

"Who reads those things nowadays.."

Not you, obviously.

ANYWAYS, NZ dashed towards Dorian, in which his nemesis welcomed him with a slap of magic across the face. Taken aback a bit, NZ recovered and gave Dorian a swift SHORYUKEN, as he was sent flying into the air. With that, NZ followed up with a fairly competent combo of aerial attacks, as such was his supposed specialty. But after the combo, things got weird. He hit Dorian with an amazing blow, sending him flying. It was as if time and space zoomed in on NZ, as he dashed towards the airbound Dorian.

"OMGWTFISGOINGON." said a panicking NZ.

You're in chase sequence, dumbass. Some combos initiate chase sequences, in which the enemy has to dodge either a BRAVE attack or an HP attack. BRAVE attacks continue the chase, and HP well, deals the damage but ends the chase. Basically like playing a more manlier version of rock, paper, scissors, and instead of losing, you're horribly mangled by your opponent.

"..I kinda like this. It's almost like a movie."

Okay then Jet Li, then do something.

And with that, NZ decided to BRAVE attack him. Sucker-punching him, he delivered a swift kick to the genitals, and with that the sound of glass shattering exploded in his ears, and everything turned inverted for a split second. At that moment, Dorian looked like his baby died in his arms while being mauled by bearsharks that broke into his house, while Lady GaGa danced in front of him. What a hilarious expression of pain on his face.

BREAK!

"What just happened..?"

You put him in BREAK. It's when you drop your opponent's BRAVE points to zero, giving you an assload of BRAVE and rendering him unable to damage your brave points. He can either brave attack you until his BRAVE points reset, or HP attack to do the same thing. Sounds simple enough, yes?

To finish up the assault, NZ finished the chase by swinging his sword downwards, akin to a baseball bat. He didn't notice it at first, but everytime he attacked Dorian, blue specks of energy fluttered everywhere. He had been unknowingly absorbing all of this energy, and soon a poignant 'ding!' was heard. As if feeling like he needed to finish his opponent in an epic and grandiose manner, he was surrounded in a white light, and took the form of the Virgo, as seen from his final battle.

"Woah! What happened now?!"

This is EX Mode. When you battle someone in this realm, ambient energy known as EX Force is released. If you have absorbed enough, you can enter EX Mode, which is your most powerful form. WHich in your case is the Virgo. Basically, EX Mode makes you stronger, faster, and lay the epic smackdown on your enemy. Your special ability in EX Mode is longer aerial combos and the ability to block attacks while jumping.

"Zodiack Cross!" said NZ, using his aerial HP attack. He quickly released a cross-shaped burst of energy in front of him, a downed Dorian caught in the radius. A sqaure appeared and broke, as the smackdown was about to commence. Throwing Dorian into a sort of pocket dimension of various colors, the 12 Zodicak stones surrounded him.

"I"m going to protect everyone!" he said in a cheesy manner. The 12 stones assimilating into his body, he supercharged himself into the Serpentarius, his whip-like sword breaking off into seperate pieces. These pieces quickly attacked Dorian, while NZ was nothing but a flash of light that attacked him relentlessly. As the circle button was pressed rapidly, the gauge hit maximum, as a 'PERFECT!' appeared.

"This is where you choke...!" as his whip sword re-assembled, and wrapped the blade around his opponent and pulled, the collected energy from the attack exploding around Dorian.

"FLY AWAY-er, I mean, BOO YAH!"

THE FINAL BLOW!

Cue the well-known fanfare.

"Word to your mother."

Gained 2000 exp!
Gained 2 AP



NZ has won his first battle in this new world! What happens now? How will he fair amongst the other people in Endgame's roster? And will the other people in jeel's side be able to do the same?! IS THE SKY GOING TO HAIL DEATH ON 2012?!?!? I'm marking my calendar for next chapter, mang!
 
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Monkey

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I'm sorry, but I'm requesting only you. Maybe they might show up, as an unlockable or something.
I laughed out loud! I am definitely keeping up with this.
 

Nebula Zero

THE GREATEST ATTACK EVER
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I got the Book Wyrm award! ;________________;

I would like to thank the academy, and most of all Satan for letting me sell my soul for this moment. And now to continue writing as a souless, fiction-ridden husk of a zombie.

HAIL
 

Nebula Zero

THE GREATEST ATTACK EVER
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Oh. I never played it so I wouldn't know. :/

So in ignorance I say many thanks xD
 

Swag

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Fic lacks Swag XP

Good stuff tho NZ, I'm interested to see where you'll take this story. The resurrection of Hokage Bin Salsa maybe? lls
 
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