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How big of a gap in age is inappropriate, and when does it stop mattering.



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Crimson Crashing

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I'm 17 and today I asked a girl out that I have been talking to for about a month.
My own personal restrictions on me relationships was that I always felt dating someone 2 years or younger than me wasn't ok. My current girlfriend is 3 years.

Obviously, she is mature, and attractive. It doesn't really bother me what my friends will think, since most of them were the ones that pointed out she was cute in the first place.

But from a strangers standpoint, someone on the side lines might think it is wrong.

This is where the question in the title comes in.
 

Hollow Bastion

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Age itself isn't a good measure. One's maturity level is the better gauge. Of course, that's much harder to measure, so people just fall back to physical age.

But yeah, I've seen people in college with a maturity you'd expect from early high school, and vice versa. Just depends on whether that person is able to make an informed decision on their own.

If you want a specific range..when below the age of 20, probably a 2-3 year range is decent.
 
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Eyesore

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I'd say it stops mattering when both are over 18.
If underage, 3 years seems like the ideal limit.
 

INamineI

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I believe the other opinions also. I'm 18 and I dated a 29 year old for almost a year, no one really found it weird at all.
Even my parents were okay with it. So its should be fine right.
 

Mistearea

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Age itself isn't a good measure. One's maturity level is the better gauge. Of course, that's much harder to measure, so people just fall back to physical age.

But yeah, I've seen people in college with a maturity you'd expect from early high school, and vice versa. Just depends on whether that person is able to make an informed decision on their own.

If you want a specific range..when below the age of 20, probably a 2-3 year range is decent.
This.

But sadly, this can sometimes lead to a bit of a crime. I say this because a couple years ago, I fell for a girl that was only thirteen. It was mostly her maturity and intelligence that got me and I even planned to wait on her to turn 18, but she ended up moving and we haven't really had a chance to stay in touch. She may have been young, but she had the mind of someone my age and could keep up with me when I "released my limiter", unlike most of the people that I know around my age.

...I'm constantly asked for definitions in a casual conversation. But she never asked for them because she already knew the words. So basically, what Bastion here said.
 

Crimson Crashing

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This.

But sadly, this can sometimes lead to a bit of a crime. I say this because a couple years ago, I fell for a girl that was only thirteen. It was mostly her maturity and intelligence that got me and I even planned to wait on her to turn 18, but she ended up moving and we haven't really had a chance to stay in touch. She may have been young, but she had the mind of someone my age and could keep up with me when I "released my limiter", unlike most of the people that I know around my age.

...I'm constantly asked for definitions in a casual conversation. But she never asked for them because she already knew the words. So basically, what Bastion here said.
I feel like I have a lot in common with this post.
I can talk to her the way I talk to my friends of my own age, and she will get what I am saying more than they will.
She is intelligent and witty enough to keep a conversation entertaining for hours on end.
 
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I'm 18 and I dated a 29 year old for almost a year, no one really found it weird at all. Even my parents were okay with it. So its should be fine right.
An 18 year old dating somebody more than a decade their senior is pretty fucking far from 'fine'.
 

impart

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I think in high school 4 years should be the cut off. that's a little gross. In adulthood I think it matters less.
seeing as how peoples brains dont fully develop until their 20's
one high school year can make allot of difference in your behavior and personality
whenever I would see a freshmen and a senior going out, the older of the two would always be creepy
 

Solar

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It depends on people themselves

20-some with 30-some? Sure, as long as they can both handle it.
 

Silverslide

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I believe the other opinions also. I'm 18 and I dated a 29 year old for almost a year, no one really found it weird at all.
Even my parents were okay with it. So its should be fine right.
she was 10 when you were a fetus

It really depends on the age really. Kreixa's chart is pretty accurate actually.
 

krexia

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can you guys explain the chart i'm kinda lost
Take a person's age, divide by two, add seven. That gives you the minimum age they can date without it being creepy. If they're under 14 years old, they shouldn't be dating anyone.

I find the half-plus-seven rule works surprisingly well - I've had sex with people who fall outside either end of the 'acceptable' range, but I have a very hard time seeing myself in an actual relationship with someone that much younger or older than me.
 

Shinra

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The lowest I'll go is two years younger than me...My most recent girlfriend was three years younger and it just didn't fell right....It usually depends on the person really
 

captain

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for me, one year younger.. i don't really have a limit for older actually..
 

MangaCrazy101

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Well there is ten years between my mother and my step-father ( i actually find that weird). But it's working way well for them.
For older adults it's less of a problem because society doesn't have to wrry about them being 'corrupt'. For the average High schooler theres a 2-3 year age limit. Out of school anything over ten is a bit cougarish.

And this rule people usually go by: females dont date younger guys/ males dont date older women.
My sister has been dating a guy a month younger than her for a month ( I know its not a very big ge gap but still).
It doesn't have to be followed like the age difference; people give her shit about it but she doesn't care; both sets of parents have approved which is all you need to worry about.
 
E

Eyesore

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Well there is ten years between my mother and my step-father ( i actually find that weird). But it's working way well for them.
For older adults it's less of a problem because society doesn't have to wrry about them being 'corrupt'. For the average High schooler theres a 2-3 year age limit. Out of school anything over ten is a bit cougarish.

And this rule people usually go by: females dont date younger guys/ males dont date older women.
My sister has been dating a guy a month younger than her for a month ( I know its not a very big ge gap but still).
It doesn't have to be followed like the age difference; people give her shit about it but she doesn't care; both sets of parents have approved which is all you need to worry about.
Please help me understand this. Because my mind is unraveling here.
Your sister. Is dating a guy, one month!?!?! Younger than her. And people are giving her shit about it...???
This can't be real life.
 
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