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Coffee Lover

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Every day I hear about one of my female classmates or friends being played or just used for sex by a male. Not too long ago I heard about this guy who became friends with this girl for three weeks but he hasn't spoken a word to her since they've had sex. He ignores her and treats her like crap now. Sure, I know there are guys out there who are not like that, but I know very few of them. Because of this, I believe that there’s a 60-70% chance that if I were to enter a relationship with a male, he’d cheat on me. Even the guys that everyone thinks are sweet and innocent cheat on their girlfriends.

If I meet a guy that I like, I want to know if he’s the cheater or playa type before I start a relationship with him. What are the signs?

How will I know if a guy is just jumping into a relationship with me just to have sex? He could just buy me stuff, and tell me what I want to hear, and do stuff a regular boyfriend does to hide it.
 

jazznam89

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Homer: "A woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!"

Well some signs to look for is how friendly is he with your friends especially any good looking/hot sort of friends you have. Then there's the mobile messages, ring calls and what not from other girls and all. Personality wise does he think he's God's gift to women or is he some some sociopath with a penchant to fake depression/pity. If he likes to hug you and what not then you know he's definitely a randy person.

Even the ones that are laid-back, try to act cool, book worm types all want one thing and that's the **** in the mouth. And if the "I love you" starts early then you know he's trying to seal the deal pretty early and make it a claim. We think with the penis instead of the brain as we're usually defined as.

There's more other crap I forgot but it'll come back.
 

Mordecai

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Non-talkative. Big sign. It means they're bored. Just don't let him get bored. Keep them interested. Don't be clingy every day. They'll eventually see it as.. "Well, this has been going on far too long. I'll just go along and get something else now." It works two ways - Guys want what they don't have, and girls want what they can't have. Keep that flirtatious spark to you and kind of ignore him sometimes. Just do little things to make him feel left out, tiny things, to keep him wanting your attention, and so on.

It's all about games.

That "I love you" thing is a big sign too. But, you'll know when they ask for sex. For example, a guy that's going to cheat will do it because you aren't giving it up to him in time. Guys like that are hard to keep, but it doesn't mean that they WILL FOR SURE cheat on you. Keep him interested, keep the possibility of sex open, and just.. yeah. I'm tired right now, but I'll cover more when I'm up to it.

Main thing is keep him interested. Guys get bored.
 

Thelonepickle

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Dude, I'd rather have it WELL-known what my beliefs were about sex before ever considering a relationship with someone else. XP

That's kind of a big deal. If you make it known that you're not gonna put out just to fit in, then you'll never have to worry about seeing a guy who's gonna pressure you. XP

Maybe they're just not mature enough for what you want right now. XP
 

Stavvy

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As Thelongpickle(I don't talk to you much, but I never thought that you were a girl,lol) said.

Just don't have sex with him. Problem solved. If he still cheats on you, dump his ass. I know that I'd never do that to my girl, I like her too much to be a dumbass.
 

Dealer_Camel

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If a guy's doing nothing but making suggestive remarks all the time towards you while being chummy with other girls, he's not worth having. Trust me, I've seen this happen countless times.

If he's just telling you what you want to hear, but he's still an idiot underneath, it'll generally show through pretty quickly (i.e. a week).

If he can keep the act up for longer than that, he truly is a rotten %&$#@@*.

Ideally your boyfriend doesn't pressure you to have sex at all, but my opinion's a bit biased on that.
 

Stavvy

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So then, answer her question, how can you tell if someone IS worth having.

I'd honestly hope that I am. . but I wouldn't know how to describe myself. . . .nor would I if I could. .
 

Dealer_Camel

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So then, answer her question, how can you tell if someone IS worth having.

If he is worth having, he'll be more shy than those who've had so many girlfriends that he knows all the moves.

More girlfriends = more dumpage.

That works about 90% of the time.

For the other 10%... I don't know... knowledge comes with time, or something like that?
 

TheMuffinMan

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Why do you feel the need to be dating in the first place? It's not an obligation, if you don't feel comfortable with all the "playas", then simply stay away from dating.
 

Johnny Stooge

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"Serious relationships" are a joke when they involve teenagers. The break up is inevitable whether it be two weeks or two years.

Girls want love and affection. Guys just want to have fun.
 

Stavvy

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Well, they could just be really horny teenagers. . .is that so hard to comprehend?

I mean, you can go without sex (me) it's just a wee bit harder. . .
 

Dealer_Camel

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"Serious relationships" are a joke when they involve teenagers. The break up is inevitable whether it be two weeks or two years.

Quoted for complete truth.

Girls want love and affection. Guys just want to have fun.

Quoted completely not for truth, but because to clear the record, I'm NOT a type of guy who just wants to have fun. Off topic I know, but...
 

risingfalls

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Well, if you are a teenager like me, then a "serious" relationship is a rare find. I've seen people get together in 2nd period and be broken up by lunch...not to say that you aren't a keeper.
But from what I have seen, if he displays any signs of being a "playa", such as having 56 girlfriends in the span of 1 year, or having rumors of his sexual aptness being spread around the school, then stay away from him until he gets his act together. I mean, I don't have a boyfriend, but I have a lot of guy friends, and some of their minds are in a place that makes the gutter look spotless......so why would you even put yourself in a position that you know would compromise your rep and your beliefs? (the correct answer is :you wouldn't)If the guy seems to be a sweetheart, then date him. No one is forcing you to have sex with him, and if he is, then you should break up with him. If all he wants is sex, then eventually, he will leave you for some other little slut so he can get his fix. I know that a lot of guys hide their true intent from the girls that they are dating, but some of that can be attributed to the fact that they are teenage boys, and they are just really sex crazed (well, some of them). This makes it really hard for girls to cull out the real keepers from the crap, and I really can't help you there.
But still, a lot of this does fall on your shoulders. If the guy pushing for sex is what worries you and he appears to be a sweet guy, then don't have sex with him. This is a female's vulnerability. When guys start to say that they love them, then all of a sudden, they decide to go and have sex with him. Be firm in your decision to NOT do the deed. Don't give me some random crap about you wanting to do it and why can't you and blah and blah and whatever other reason you might have to do it. If this is the boy's leverage over a female, then the girl should take it away.
 

Story Keeper

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Well, if you are a teenager like me, then a "serious" relationship is a rare find. I've seen people get together in 2nd period and be broken up by lunch...not to say that you aren't a keeper.
But from what I have seen, if he displays any signs of being a "playa", such as having 56 girlfriends in the span of 1 year, or having rumors of his sexual aptness being spread around the school, then stay away from him until he gets his act together. I mean, I don't have a boyfriend, but I have a lot of guy friends, and some of their minds are in a place that makes the gutter look spotless......so why would you even put yourself in a position that you know would compromise your rep and your beliefs? (the correct answer is :you wouldn't)If the guy seems to be a sweetheart, then date him. No one is forcing you to have sex with him, and if he is, then you should break up with him. If all he wants is sex, then eventually, he will leave you for some other little slut so he can get his fix. I know that a lot of guys hide their true intent from the girls that they are dating, but some of that can be attributed to the fact that they are teenage boys, and they are just really sex crazed (well, some of them). This makes it really hard for girls to cull out the real keepers from the crap, and I really can't help you there.
But still, a lot of this does fall on your shoulders. If the guy pushing for sex is what worries you and he appears to be a sweet guy, then don't have sex with him. This is a female's vulnerability. When guys start to say that they love them, then all of a sudden, they decide to go and have sex with him. Be firm in your decision to NOT do the deed. Don't give me some random crap about you wanting to do it and why can't you and blah and blah and whatever other reason you might have to do it. If this is the boy's leverage over a female, then the girl should take it away.

Hmm, there you go GR. I think risingfalls has put it down quite clearly, along with the others. But if they keep on bugging you, you could tell them....nevermind. It's not very nice, well I have read it on different threads; it's more like I'm not brave enough to suggest it. But I'd still kick a guy's butt if they dared asked for a one night stand sort of thing.
 
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