No, please point out any mistake. I don't see the difference between this and what I wrote though...what's wrong with it?
Fanfiction ► For I have power.
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No, please point out any mistake. I don't see the difference between this and what I wrote though...what's wrong with it?
no, I was pointing out that it doesn't make any sense. "Or any other weirds ever again"
see what I mean?
Hmm, ok, thanks for pointing it out. =) But well, I think I'll let it be for now. xD
Sorry for double post but: ¡Update!
I decided to put in Sub-chapter 3 after all, so check it out!
...What had happened to Marten? =O Why does he look evil? =O
Find out in the next Chapter!
Chapter 5: A place for both of us.
I decided to put in Sub-chapter 3 after all, so check it out!
...What had happened to Marten? =O Why does he look evil? =O
Find out in the next Chapter!
Chapter 5: A place for both of us.
Interesting update. I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
Yes, well I've been thinking alot about that 'plottwist' in the 3rd sub-chapter, and finally decided to just trow it out and see what happens. This will complicate the writing a whole lot...though it will be more fun! ^^
Yay!
More complicated stuff for me to be confused about. <3
More complicated stuff for me to be confused about. <3
That indeed.
And God, I'm so excited. xD
I just thought up this plottwist like two days back or so, but now as I read back every chapter...I seem to, unconsciously, have made all the preparations for it. It fits in perfectly! Yay! ^^
I want to write, write, write, and write some more!
And I definetly need to stop drinking as much Red Bull as I do. xD
And God, I'm so excited. xD
I just thought up this plottwist like two days back or so, but now as I read back every chapter...I seem to, unconsciously, have made all the preparations for it. It fits in perfectly! Yay! ^^
I want to write, write, write, and write some more!
And I definetly need to stop drinking as much Red Bull as I do. xD
Red Bull = <3
If I wasn't on a caffeine ban, I'd be having loads of it right now.
If I wasn't on a caffeine ban, I'd be having loads of it right now.
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That was awesome, it's too bad I can't read much. I am sorta cut off from the internet because of my brothers, and I can't read during class because I moved next to the teach (damn Pedo). Anyways, I'll try to read this awesome story when I can get to it.
@DP: Yeah, I normally drink a cheap spin-off, which is in fact better then Red Bull in every way, but I'm not at home right now, so yeah. xD
@SBD: Thanks! And don't worry, it won't just dissapear! =D
Anyway, yeah, confusing chapter. More dialogue. Not so sure about the second sub-chapter. Bla, bla... xDDD Nah, Its cool. I really love writing this fic.
So yeah, enjoy!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 5: A place for both of us.
I think I'm gonna be sad,
'cause all I show you,
is a man who's only going bad.
Come on stay by my side,
and see the wicked in me.
Sub-chapter 1: Carnage unknowingly.
Timeschedule: Past, after the dream. Diary Date: 03 - 01 - '01
Quiet.
Quiet, the best way to describe the room. A normal room. Some bookshelfs, a desk, some pillows, some toys, and a bed...with a boy. Peacefully sleeping, or so it seemed.
The sun rose, beams of its light fell through the big window across the room. Dust from a room not well cleaned floated through the air, bathing in the sunlight. The boy slowly opened his eyes and blinked. Light... Light? Light! How could that be? He wondered, stretching. He had never opened the curtains of that window. He liked the silence of the dark.
The boy left his bed, quickly closed the curtains again, and got dressed.
'Again that dream...'
Another thing struck his mind.
'What did I do yesterday..?'
Strange.
His head raised, his thoughs were interrupted. He heard a sound. A familiar sound. All sorts of memories suddenly battled for his attention, when he noticed another thing. Smell...that lovely smell...
You ever noticed how sounds, taste or smell can make you remember things you forgot since long? For example a song, or a particular piece of candy? The strongest of those is smell. Due to smell, you can once again feel the love you once felt by just sniffing the tiniest sent of her perfume. Or remember that rainy day on vacation, when all your friends already left for home, just by smelling the wet, black earth.
But Marten never had a girlfriend. He never went on vacation with his family or friends. What he did have...was his mother. The memory of his mother and the sound and smell of her making breakfast for him every morning...
Tears of joy and unbelieve sought their way to his chin as he ran downstairs.
'Mom? Mom! Mom is that you? Have you really come back to me?'
He entered the kitchen, survying the area. A woman stood infront of a furnace. From the pans and plates arose slight strings of steam. The smell of it invaded his nose, enchanting him. The woman wore his mothers cooking skirt, and seemed to be humming a song, just like she always did.
'Mom..?'
The woman turned around. A gentle, kind face of a young woman, surrounded by curly, hazel coloured hair turned his way. Grey/green eyes stared into his. It was not his mother.
'Oh, your awake. How are you feeling, youngster? Sorry if you mistook me for your mother...you seemed to live alone here so I decided to stay for a while after I brought you here.'
The woman, or girl actually had a soft, comforting voice.
'Are you hungry? I prepared some breakfast.'
Marten started at her, doubting. At long last he nodded and sat down by the table. The woman placed a plate in front of him with some toast, an egg, and a small pancake.
'There you go, eat some!'
She then placed a glass of milk and a glass of orange juice next to his plate.
'And drink this, you need your vitamins.'
Marten didn't know what else to do then just eat and drink, so that's what he did, meanwhile observing the room. It bathed in light. All the curtains were removed from the windows, which were cleaned throughoutly. She had also cleaned the rest of the kitchen a bit, it looked nice...better...like when his mother was still alive.
The young woman sat down in front of him and hapilly watched him eat the food. She waited till he was done with his breakfast before she spoke.
'So, what's your name, sweetie?'
Marten swallowed his last piece of toast. He didn't answer.
'Come on, can't I at least know your name? I swear I won't tell anyone.' She joked, trying to break the ice a bit.
'Marten...and thank you.'
The woman smiled.
'Nice to meet you, Marten, my name is Evelia, and don't mention it. My father always says 'The savior bears guilt'. I thought it was a strange saying at first, but I know what he meant now. I couldn't just leave you after I brought you here. I had to make sure you were ok.'
Marten had listened in silence, observing her in the meantime. He noticed he was blushing and quickly look the other way. She was beautifull...an angel?
'W-why did you h-have to bring me here?' He finally stumbled.
'I hoped you could tell me that. I found you unconscious at the end of the main north street. When I lifted you up you mumbled this adress, so I brought you here. You were in a pretty bad state...you slept for two days.' She answered, walking up to the furnace.
'You want some more?'
She turned her head to him, smiling once more.
'S-some m-more juice please.' He answered, trying to progress what she just told him.
'More juice, coming up!'
She looked at him while he took a sip of the freshly made orange juice, her expression more serious. She swallowed and sighed, as if it was hard for her to speak the next words.
'I think you have been very lucky, Marten...I thought you were dead when I first saw you... There has been-'
Her voice halted, conquered by...fear..? disbelieve..?
'There has been an...incident down the main street.'
She continued, but soon it turned into a surpressed mumbling, more to herself then to Marten.
'7 children dead...all your age, Marten...togheter with an older man, who apparently was the shopowner of where it happened...7 children...'
Marten didn't know what to say, she seemed so sad, so fragile. He thought he would break her mentally if he would only made the slighest noise. So they just stared into other realities for a few minutes. Deep silence. Eventually, Evelia sighed and regained her normal state.
'But why am I telling you something so dark at the moment? Come, eat some more!' She said, turning her back to the table.
Marten lifted his head.
'W-were they from the Gerard Holte institute-'
He swallowed.
'The Gerard Holte institute...the local highschool..?
'Yes.'
'..Class A5..?'
Evelia thought for a moment. She didn't turn around, but talked over her shoulder.
'Come, this really isn't the time to talk about this. Let me bring you to bed, you need more rest.'
She finally turned around, noticing the tears burning in Marten's eyes.
'So they were...'
He shove his chair back, stood up, and ran back upstairs, with tears once again streaming down his cheeks. Evelia sighed. She tried.
Marten stormed into his room, sat down on his bed. He always had trouble with the kids at his school, but he had never wished for this... Because even though they were on bad terms with eachother most of the time, he had known them well. And now...they would never come to school again, never talk to him again, even if it were words that hurt.
Evelia cleaned up the kitchen after he had left. Slowly, bit by bit, just to get her mind of her tears. Yes, she had cried. For yesterday she had lost her little brother.
Sub-chapter 2: Mirrorworks
Timeschedule: Past, after the dream. Diary Date: 04 - 01 - '01 till 05 - 01 - '01
The room was quiet once again. The sound of tears and sadness had left it since Marten fell asleep.
Disturbance. Noise. Wind. The door had opened and a figure slipped through it, as the sound of tears once again filled the room. Moonlight fell through a torn in the curtain and revealed something of a sharp object in the hand of the figure.
'...revenge.' A voice full of hatred whispered.
Sadness and loss spoke from every part of the body of the figure as it raised his arm and pierced the knife in the direction of the sleeping Marten. A sudden 'BANG!' filled the room, the arm of the figure was thrown back, taking her with it. Yes, her. It was Evelia trying to kill Marten. The last now sat straight up in his bed.
'Evelia, what are you doing here?' He asked, wondering.
'Shut up, Marten! I saw you! In the main street! You killed them! You...killed them...killed my brother.'
Tears as raindrops fell on the wooden floor.
'What..? No, no, I was here...in my house, in my room..!' He shouted defending, but at that moment he realised again...his memory was gone. What did he do yesterday anyway?
Confused. His memory closed. He looked up to Evelia, who was breathing heavily, when he noticed the knife. The reflection of an eye. His eye?
Darkness.
The next day he woke up troubled, feeling weird.
He never saw Evelia again.
@SBD: Thanks! And don't worry, it won't just dissapear! =D
Anyway, yeah, confusing chapter. More dialogue. Not so sure about the second sub-chapter. Bla, bla... xDDD Nah, Its cool. I really love writing this fic.
So yeah, enjoy!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 5: A place for both of us.
I think I'm gonna be sad,
'cause all I show you,
is a man who's only going bad.
Come on stay by my side,
and see the wicked in me.
Part from the song 'Wicked Owl' by :Battle:
Sub-chapter 1: Carnage unknowingly.
Timeschedule: Past, after the dream. Diary Date: 03 - 01 - '01
Quiet.
Quiet, the best way to describe the room. A normal room. Some bookshelfs, a desk, some pillows, some toys, and a bed...with a boy. Peacefully sleeping, or so it seemed.
The sun rose, beams of its light fell through the big window across the room. Dust from a room not well cleaned floated through the air, bathing in the sunlight. The boy slowly opened his eyes and blinked. Light... Light? Light! How could that be? He wondered, stretching. He had never opened the curtains of that window. He liked the silence of the dark.
The boy left his bed, quickly closed the curtains again, and got dressed.
'Again that dream...'
Another thing struck his mind.
'What did I do yesterday..?'
Strange.
His head raised, his thoughs were interrupted. He heard a sound. A familiar sound. All sorts of memories suddenly battled for his attention, when he noticed another thing. Smell...that lovely smell...
You ever noticed how sounds, taste or smell can make you remember things you forgot since long? For example a song, or a particular piece of candy? The strongest of those is smell. Due to smell, you can once again feel the love you once felt by just sniffing the tiniest sent of her perfume. Or remember that rainy day on vacation, when all your friends already left for home, just by smelling the wet, black earth.
But Marten never had a girlfriend. He never went on vacation with his family or friends. What he did have...was his mother. The memory of his mother and the sound and smell of her making breakfast for him every morning...
Tears of joy and unbelieve sought their way to his chin as he ran downstairs.
'Mom? Mom! Mom is that you? Have you really come back to me?'
He entered the kitchen, survying the area. A woman stood infront of a furnace. From the pans and plates arose slight strings of steam. The smell of it invaded his nose, enchanting him. The woman wore his mothers cooking skirt, and seemed to be humming a song, just like she always did.
'Mom..?'
The woman turned around. A gentle, kind face of a young woman, surrounded by curly, hazel coloured hair turned his way. Grey/green eyes stared into his. It was not his mother.
'Oh, your awake. How are you feeling, youngster? Sorry if you mistook me for your mother...you seemed to live alone here so I decided to stay for a while after I brought you here.'
The woman, or girl actually had a soft, comforting voice.
'Are you hungry? I prepared some breakfast.'
Marten started at her, doubting. At long last he nodded and sat down by the table. The woman placed a plate in front of him with some toast, an egg, and a small pancake.
'There you go, eat some!'
She then placed a glass of milk and a glass of orange juice next to his plate.
'And drink this, you need your vitamins.'
Marten didn't know what else to do then just eat and drink, so that's what he did, meanwhile observing the room. It bathed in light. All the curtains were removed from the windows, which were cleaned throughoutly. She had also cleaned the rest of the kitchen a bit, it looked nice...better...like when his mother was still alive.
The young woman sat down in front of him and hapilly watched him eat the food. She waited till he was done with his breakfast before she spoke.
'So, what's your name, sweetie?'
Marten swallowed his last piece of toast. He didn't answer.
'Come on, can't I at least know your name? I swear I won't tell anyone.' She joked, trying to break the ice a bit.
'Marten...and thank you.'
The woman smiled.
'Nice to meet you, Marten, my name is Evelia, and don't mention it. My father always says 'The savior bears guilt'. I thought it was a strange saying at first, but I know what he meant now. I couldn't just leave you after I brought you here. I had to make sure you were ok.'
Marten had listened in silence, observing her in the meantime. He noticed he was blushing and quickly look the other way. She was beautifull...an angel?
'W-why did you h-have to bring me here?' He finally stumbled.
'I hoped you could tell me that. I found you unconscious at the end of the main north street. When I lifted you up you mumbled this adress, so I brought you here. You were in a pretty bad state...you slept for two days.' She answered, walking up to the furnace.
'You want some more?'
She turned her head to him, smiling once more.
'S-some m-more juice please.' He answered, trying to progress what she just told him.
'More juice, coming up!'
She looked at him while he took a sip of the freshly made orange juice, her expression more serious. She swallowed and sighed, as if it was hard for her to speak the next words.
'I think you have been very lucky, Marten...I thought you were dead when I first saw you... There has been-'
Her voice halted, conquered by...fear..? disbelieve..?
'There has been an...incident down the main street.'
She continued, but soon it turned into a surpressed mumbling, more to herself then to Marten.
'7 children dead...all your age, Marten...togheter with an older man, who apparently was the shopowner of where it happened...7 children...'
Marten didn't know what to say, she seemed so sad, so fragile. He thought he would break her mentally if he would only made the slighest noise. So they just stared into other realities for a few minutes. Deep silence. Eventually, Evelia sighed and regained her normal state.
'But why am I telling you something so dark at the moment? Come, eat some more!' She said, turning her back to the table.
Marten lifted his head.
'W-were they from the Gerard Holte institute-'
He swallowed.
'The Gerard Holte institute...the local highschool..?
'Yes.'
'..Class A5..?'
Evelia thought for a moment. She didn't turn around, but talked over her shoulder.
'Come, this really isn't the time to talk about this. Let me bring you to bed, you need more rest.'
She finally turned around, noticing the tears burning in Marten's eyes.
'So they were...'
He shove his chair back, stood up, and ran back upstairs, with tears once again streaming down his cheeks. Evelia sighed. She tried.
Marten stormed into his room, sat down on his bed. He always had trouble with the kids at his school, but he had never wished for this... Because even though they were on bad terms with eachother most of the time, he had known them well. And now...they would never come to school again, never talk to him again, even if it were words that hurt.
Evelia cleaned up the kitchen after he had left. Slowly, bit by bit, just to get her mind of her tears. Yes, she had cried. For yesterday she had lost her little brother.
Sub-chapter 2: Mirrorworks
Timeschedule: Past, after the dream. Diary Date: 04 - 01 - '01 till 05 - 01 - '01
The room was quiet once again. The sound of tears and sadness had left it since Marten fell asleep.
Disturbance. Noise. Wind. The door had opened and a figure slipped through it, as the sound of tears once again filled the room. Moonlight fell through a torn in the curtain and revealed something of a sharp object in the hand of the figure.
'...revenge.' A voice full of hatred whispered.
Sadness and loss spoke from every part of the body of the figure as it raised his arm and pierced the knife in the direction of the sleeping Marten. A sudden 'BANG!' filled the room, the arm of the figure was thrown back, taking her with it. Yes, her. It was Evelia trying to kill Marten. The last now sat straight up in his bed.
'Evelia, what are you doing here?' He asked, wondering.
'Shut up, Marten! I saw you! In the main street! You killed them! You...killed them...killed my brother.'
Tears as raindrops fell on the wooden floor.
'What..? No, no, I was here...in my house, in my room..!' He shouted defending, but at that moment he realised again...his memory was gone. What did he do yesterday anyway?
Confused. His memory closed. He looked up to Evelia, who was breathing heavily, when he noticed the knife. The reflection of an eye. His eye?
Darkness.
The next day he woke up troubled, feeling weird.
He never saw Evelia again.
Last edited:
Damnit! Now, you have to make a mistake in your next chapter. Pwettypwease? xD
Yeah, thanks for pointing out in any case. xD
Edit: Edited.
Yeah, thanks for pointing out in any case. xD
Edit: Edited.
Sounds like a really torture kid. This is a really well written story your an excellent writer. Unfortunatly this kind of thing really isn't my style. It's so depressing that the kid doesn't get a break from his lonelyness. Just and endless spiral of hurt and deicite. the fact that you can make me feel this way just prove that your good at what you do keep it up. But i thinnk i'll go find a colorful rainbow to sleep under.
Well, he meets Evelia in the last chapter, allthough it is not for long. And it'll have a good ending, I think. But yeah, it'll take another few chapters before he really finds some sort of happiness. Depends on what path my inspiration will take. xD
I almost let Evelia live for a while, but my inspiration made a weird turn all of a sudden, so yeah, too bad for Marten. ^^
I almost let Evelia live for a while, but my inspiration made a weird turn all of a sudden, so yeah, too bad for Marten. ^^
Haha, oh no, I only listen to inspiration when it comes to my stories or poems. =) But please, if you ever change your mind on further reading this, you're more than welcome! ^^
Not many people who reguraly post, so yeah, would be appreciated. xD
Edit: I'll drown the puppies.
And yeah, weird plottwist right? xDD
Not many people who reguraly post, so yeah, would be appreciated. xD
Edit: I'll drown the puppies.
And yeah, weird plottwist right? xDD
Ok, sorry for double post again, but again update...I noticed I missed out a few sentences of the last sub-chapter. xDD
Sorry.
Sorry.
*Hugs*
Awesome chapter, love.
Shame Marten's happiness was so short lived but eh... Life is harsh. XD
What cheap substitute do you drink? If its better than Redbull, I wanna try it!
Awesome chapter, love.
Shame Marten's happiness was so short lived but eh... Life is harsh. XD
What cheap substitute do you drink? If its better than Redbull, I wanna try it!
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