• Hello everybody! We have tons of new awards for the new year that can be requested through our Awards System thanks to Antifa Lockhart! Some are limited-time awards so go claim them before they are gone forever...

    CLICK HERE FOR AWARDS

First RP Battle



REGISTER TO REMOVE ADS
Status
Not open for further replies.

violent_anger

Think smaller, more legs.
Joined
Dec 28, 2005
Messages
6,465
Age
31
Location
Blowing up The storm's around. In a silence Have a
I've never actually posted in the RP section before, and have no intention of posting in the general RP section for a developing story or something like that. I have an idea for a template, name and abilities and such, but I want to make sure that this thread won't be moved or deleted or anything like that.

And I'd appreciate it if someone gave me some sort of tutorial battle too.
 
T

Tyler Durden

Guest
D2L, don't you think that you have been doing this for a little too long for it to be fair against v_a?


I also apply to be your combatant, v_a. Choose whoever you like.
 

violent_anger

Think smaller, more legs.
Joined
Dec 28, 2005
Messages
6,465
Age
31
Location
Blowing up The storm's around. In a silence Have a
D2L got here first, and what's the point of learning if you don't learn from someone who can kick your ass? Of course, DK could kick my ass too, probably.

My template may or may not suck, so could you give me some suggestions?





Name: Edward Cras
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Race: Human

Appearance: A black haired, white skin man, who stands 6 feet tall. His face is ordinary, he would blend in well with a crowd of random people. The only odd thing about his face are that his eyes are pink, of the same shade as Kirby. He's somewhat bulky, not as much as a weightlifter, but more like a Heavy Weight Boxer. His hair is unkept, and he often fights while he still has his bedhead, although someone usually think that it's spiked hair and yells 'KAWAII!!' He usually wears black pants and a white collared shirt. He has a bag slung over his back that carries two heavy bars of iron.

Personality: He's an egotistical bastard on occasion, and hates being wrong, but he will admit that he was wrong. He makes alot of jokes, usually bad puns. Everyone thinks that he's a cunning and cutthroat bastard, but he doesn't think of himself as such. He likes doing the right thing, but also what benefits himself, sometimes he picks a balance, while other times, he picks one over the other.

Bio: He was an 8 year old boy in the apartment of a big city who had just watched a marathon of Kirby. He heard that there was going to be a shooting star that night so he went up to the roof of his apartment to see if it was visible through the layer of pollution. This shooting star was bright enough to be seen, which you couldn't say often. He wished upon the star "Please give me awesome powers like Kirby." Amazingly, this seemed to be the right thing to say. He blinked, and then was in some mysterious lace that was all white, kind of like the training place that Goku went to. A booming and jolly voice then said to him from nowhere " HAHAHA, so you want powers like Kirby, you say? Well, who am I to deny you? When you become 15 years of age, your eyes will become the color of Kirby, so that all who look at you may know who you are. At the same time, you will receive the powers I promised you. Don't worry about losing control and killing yourself, like so many bad TV characters do." And with that, Edward was back on the roof of his apartment. He told his parents about it, and that it really happened. But unlike the million other 8 year olds who say that, his experience really did happen.
So then, seven days after his 15th birthday, this shooting-star-Kirby-god experience was all but forgotten. Then when he woke up the next morning and looked in the mirror, to see that his eyes were bright pink. Hilarity ensued as he tried to figure out what happened. He blinked like crazy, and it was only after a dozen rapid blinks that he realized he is back at that Goku-training place. The voice booms "HAHAHAHAHA, oh man,that was great, I should have caught that on video... Anyways, there you go, an awesome power just like Kirby's. walk around town barefoot, and you'll see what it is. Oh, and because I'm a nice guy, and I know you'll be carrying heavy stuff, I'll leave you a bag that won't break."
And with this reminder, he remembered what happened when he was 8. The bag was all but forgotten in his excitement. He did what the disembodied voice told him to do, and walked around town barefoot. Soon he realized that his feet were making a weird sound, not like the usual sound of him walking. He looked at his feet and realized that the pavement was sticking to he feet. He pressed his hand on it, and the pavement melted onto his hand. He laid face-down on the concrete, and saw that it was sticking to his entire body. It looked alot like the armor of medieval knights. He found a metal pipe, and pushed it against his chest. It melted on to him even through the pavement-armor he already had. He went in his room, and got the bag the voice gave him, and ran off adventuring. He was two years ahead of his class anyways, so he didn't mind dropping out of school.
Being an adventurer, he went to mysterious lands in search of great treasure. There he met a hobo who could see into the future, named Gad. In exchange for a month supply of canned beef, a can opener, and a steak dinner, Gad revealed to him the future. "Some Heroes will faaaallllll~," he said, "Other Heroes will be canceeeelllleeedddd~. many Heroes will plageeeerrrriiizzzeee~, and this Hero will see the red and beating through his pink eyes." Confused and regretting that he ordered his steak well done, he walked away.
Crazy homeless people were the least of his worries though, as for many months now, he had been hearing by word-of-mouth of other heroes like himself. Some of the stories told of men that could assault someone's mind and meld it with his own, but because this man was insane, the other man would also go completely insane. The answer came to him in a dream, a dream of his childhood. He was sitting in front of his TV, watching Kirby, when it said 'Don't miss the X-Men, up next.' Over and over again, it just kept saying The X-Men....The X-Men....The X-Men....The X-Men. That was when he realized the solution. Melding a powerful natural magnet and a piece of iron to himself, he then released it all in a mixed up slab of magnets and metal. Thus, he set up work in the forge that he happened to have in the apartment he lived in. Slowly, the iron took the shape of a box that would fit nicely over his head, and he knew that he would no longer be troubled by insane men who could assault someone's mind.
The next day, as he walked through the city, he met Gad again. "Ah, the Hero with the pink eyes! Tell me, have you been able to see the hearts of men with your eyes yet?" he cackled, "HAHA, don't bother answering, anyone could tell from that look on your face. The world may see you as a man grown, you may have sons and daughters, whether you know it or not, but believe me, you are still a child. Kid, you take too much upon yourself, you're still a proud little boy unwilling to accept help. Were I younger, I would smack you upside the head, but I'll settle for helping you. You came from the west, but you must only look forward. Look backwards, and you are lost. Go east, east, east, and still more, go east. I have alot of rich friends and family members who could help you. Those morons are always buying ancient scrolls and junk."

Weapons: He has a bag that can carry things of any weight without breaking, as long as it fits in the bag.
In it, he carries two heavy iron bars, each four feet long, that he either uses with his powers, or just swings around as clubs.

Ability: He can meld anything onto himself like a plate of armor, so long as it isn't organic. Exceptions to that are teeth, nails, and hair. He is also able to absorb things such as air, fire, water, and light. Absorbing light makes him glow, much like his glow-in-the-dark materials. Whatever he absorbs becomes and extension of himself, and he can absorb things on top of that. These things can stay on him by themselves. He has nearly full control over what he absorbs, but some things are automatic, such as the armor falling off if it becomes to dangerous for him. The armor falls off in four different ways: it falls off him; it falls off him and then assumes it's regular shape; it falls off him as just a random slab of stuff; Or it just disappears into air. If possible, it becomes breathable air, but otherwise, it becomes Hydrogen and Helium.
He also has an iron box in his bag, with magnets as practically part of the iron. By putting it on his head and making it a helmet, the magnets keep all mental abilities from affecting him.
One of the most common things that he does is to meld the iron bars onto his fist, making 3 feet long iron knuckles.
Because of often training while covered in heavy metals, he has an incredible strength, sacrificing none of his grace and agility, as well as the ability to jump 10 feet up in the air. In other words, he could do gymnastics while covered in hundreds of pounds of armor.
His fighting in almost entirely self-taught, punching waterfalls and 300 year-old trees and such.
 
Last edited:
T

Tyler Durden

Guest
Unfortunately, I find him severely under powered. I think that as a secondary power that would be great, but otherwise you seem offensively handicapped.

You have to remember that this is power battles; I know of one character that can assault someone's mind and meld it with his own, but because this character is insane the other person also goes completely insane; from there they are extremely easy to kill.

Not saying that this is a bad character, but you will probably be forced into defending yourself most of the time, and may never find an opportunity to kill another character.
 

Swag

Young King
Joined
Mar 3, 2006
Messages
2,710
Age
31
Location
Rolling papers...
uhh, DK, last time I checked I was completely capable of not only Role Playing, but teaching another to role play. The next you undermine me and interrupt me teaching v_a, or anyone else for that matter, I will be force to fight and publicly embarrass you.

Anyways, on 2 teh teachingz.


~~


Name: Edward Cras
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Race: Human

Appearance: A black haired, white skin man, who stands 6 feet tall. His face is ordinary, he would blend in well with a crowd of random people. The only odd thing about his face are that his eyes are pink, of the same shade as Kirby. He usually wears black pants and a white collared shirt. He has a bag slung over his back that carries two heavy bars of iron.

While being overly descriptive is usually frowned upon in RP, your template is one place where you may and should do that to your heart's content. Not saying that your appearance is bad, it just seems to be a bit short and could be more descriptive. Use a thesaurus. =P

Personality: He's an egotistical bastard on occasion, and hates being wrong, but he will admit that he was wrong. He makes alot of jokes, usually bad puns. Everyone thinks that he's a cunning and cutthroat bastard, but he doesn't think of himself as such. He likes doing the right thing, but also what benefits himself, sometimes he picks a balance, while other times, he picks one over the other.

I like his personality, but again it could be more descriptive. Try to give your character's persnality many different facets, as real people do indeed have many ddifferent sides of themselves.

Bio: He was an 8 year old boy in the apartment of a big city who had just watched a marathon of Kirby. He heard that there was going to be a shooting star that night so he went up to the roof of his apartment to see if it was visible through the layer of pollution. This shooting star was bright enough to be seen, which you couldn't say often. He wished upon the star "Please give me awesome powers like Kirby." Amazingly, this seemed to be the right thing to say. He blinked, and then was in some mysterious lace that was all white, kind of like the training place that Goku went to. A booming and jolly voice then said to him from nowhere " HAHAHA, so you want powers like Kirby, you say? Well, who am I to deny you? When you become 15 years of age, your eyes will become the color of Kirby, so that all who look at you may know who you are. At the same time, you will receive the powers I promised you. Don't worry about losing control and killing yourself, like so many bad TV characters do." And with that, Edward was back on the roof of his apartment. He told his parents about it, and that it really happened. But unlike the million other 8 year olds who say that, his experience really did happen.
So then, seven days after his 15th birthday, this shooting-star-Kirby-god experience was all but forgotten. Then when he woke up the next morning and looked in the mirror. Hilarity ensues as he tries to figure out what happened. He blinks like crazy, and it's only after a dozen rapid blinks that he realizes he is back at that Goku-training place. The voice booms "HAHAHAHAHA, oh man,that was great, I should have caught that on video... Anyways, there you go, an awesome power just like Kirby's. walk around town barefoot, and you'll see what it is. Oh, and because I'm a nice guy, and I know you'll be carrying heavy stuff, I'll leave you a bag that won't break."
And with this reminder, he remembered what happened when he was 8. The bag was all but forgotten in his excitement. He did what the disembodied voice told him to do, and walked around town barefoot. Soon he realized that his feet were making a weird sound, not like the usual sound of him walking. He looked at his feet and realized that the pavement was sticking to he feet. He pressed his hand on it, and the pavement melted onto his hand. He laid face-down on the concrete, and saw that it was sticking to his entire body. It looked alot like the armor of medieval knights. He found a metal pipe, and pushed it against his chest. It melted on to him even through the pavement-armor he already had. He went in his room, and got the bag the voice gave him, and ran off adventuring. He was two years ahead of his class anyways, so he didn't mind dropping out of school.

I lol'd all the way through this bio; in a good way though. Only qualms I have with it are that in some parts, near the end, you switch too present tense instead of past. Also, like alot of newbie bios I see nowadays, you move too fast. Just like a paper in school, use the first paragraph or so to intro duce your character; him, his parents, where he lives, his life up until age 8, and THEN go into the important part. Also, as with everything, be descriptive.

Weapons: He has a bag that can carry things of any weight without breaking, as long as it fits in the bag.
In it, he carries two heavy iron bars, each four feet long, that he either uses with his powers, or just swings around as clubs.

No problems here.

Ability: He can meld anything onto himself like a plate of armor, so long as it isn't organic. Exceptions to that are teeth, nails, and hair. He is also able to absorb things such as fire, water, and light. Absorbing light makes him glow, much like his glow-in-the-dark materials. Whatever he absorbs becomes and extension of himself, and he can absorb things on top of that. These things can stay on him by themselves. He has nearly full control over what he absorbs, but some things are automatic, such as the armor falling off if it becomes to dangerous for him. The armor falls off in four different ways: it falls off him; it falls off him and then assumes it's regular shape; it falls off him as just a random slab of stuff; Or it just disappears into air. If possible, it becomes breathable air, but otherwise, it becomes Hydrogen and Helium.
One of the most common things that he does is to meld the iron bars onto his fist, making 3 feet long iron knuckles.
Because of often training while covered in heavy metals, he has an incredible strength, and the ability to jump 10 feet up in the air.
His fighting in almost entirely self-taught, punching waterfalls and 300 year-old trees and such.

His powers I like, but I'm afraid if you were going for a Power Character this would not be it; he'd fall into the enhanced melee character class. For a character that can compete with PC characters he should have three different kinds of abilities:

Offensive ability - control over element/s, telekinesis, able to shoot lazer's out of his ass, etc. etc.

Defensive ability - magick armor, shields, etc.

Melee ability- boody enhancement, sword master, etc. etc.

If you have those three covered you should have yourself a pretty damn good PC character.
 

Joy

Bronze Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2004
Messages
2,126
And D2L, next time you say something of the sort, or actually do it, I will double team you with said victim.


Good day sir. Carry on.
 

Swag

Young King
Joined
Mar 3, 2006
Messages
2,710
Age
31
Location
Rolling papers...
That'd be perfectly fine v_a, I know of people who have done that in the past and it's actually really effective.
 

Swag

Young King
Joined
Mar 3, 2006
Messages
2,710
Age
31
Location
Rolling papers...
Well, Rhythm of Apathy's character, Mordred Blackheart, used "Anathemancy" (surreal magic) which basically allowed him to bring a surreal concept into existence; which would, in turn, allow him to bring your worst fears to life.

Also, once I created a character called Nightmare (though I never used him on here) whose main ability was bringing your worst fears/memories to life. There's more, but sadly my memory fails me.

One thing that could help if you do go with that, make sure you read your opponents template. That could and probably should give you an idea of your opponents fears, hated memories, etc. etc.
 

Swag

Young King
Joined
Mar 3, 2006
Messages
2,710
Age
31
Location
Rolling papers...
Ah, right, my bad. Guess that wasn't the right link.

Since I can't think oof anohter one right now, I'll just give you an example;

Let's say, you're fighting someone, and you read their characters bio and it says that in his past he was taken by the darkness at some point. You could then summon that darkness and control it.

Or if they fear death, you could actually summon yourself a death good/reaper/shinigami/whatever and have them fight with you.

There are literally nearly endless possibilities with that power.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top