Devoured (Chapter 5)



REGISTER TO REMOVE ADS

VoidGear.

red gay
Joined
Jun 6, 2015
Messages
5,547
Age
24
Location
Germany
  • No Name
  • Put That Thing Back Where It Came From
  • Melodious Nocturne
  • Luna Diviner
  • Cloaked Schemer
  • Chilly Academic
Woohoo, I actually finally did it.
This first chapter is more like a prologue, so I suppose it's shorter than future chapters will be. :3
This story is gonna be like a crime novel, so violence, blood and such will be included. :X You have been warned!

------------------------------------------------

“Dead,” was the only thing a young woman muttered, half to herself and half to her colleague, Jonathan, who was approaching her just now. He raised an eyebrow at her attitude, grabbing her shoulder with one hand.
“Shouldn't you be at least a little more...concerned, Val?”
Kneeling down to get rid of his hand, she shook her head in defense.
“You expect me to cry over someone I don't even know anymore?”
She put on a glove in order to not leave stains or smudge the ones that hopefully already were on the dead person's face.
“Amy Coris. She was 22 if I recall it correctly.”
The girl's underlip was slit open brutally, probably with a blunt, even rusty knife. Dried blood stuck on her chin and her eyes' expression was hollow. Taking a closer look, Valerie realized something was missing.
“Five fingers," she heard Jonathan say. His voice was calm but she knew he was more than unsettled. Exactly all five fingers were missing on her right hand. They had been cut off neatly right where the palm ended, and were nowhere close to be found.
“Why would anyone steal fingers, though?” Jonathan asked confusedly, crossing his arms in front of his body. But was the culprit actually stealing them? Maybe they cut them off before killing the victim in order to make them suffer more, and then just threw them away. But Valerie was sure there was even more behind all that.
“The first victim was missing only a few fingernails, right? And the second was ripped off two fingers. I wonder if the next one will be missing a whole hand.”
“Could you not talk about a next victim just like that?”
She rolled her eyes and got to her feet, turning away from the corpse. Cleaning this up was luckily not her job, but she couldn't say she was happy with what had to be done next.
First of all, she needed to get some sort of conclusion out of this. This was the third person in a row being killed only days apart, and there was no doubt the murders were linked together. All three of them had been classmates more than five years ago.
Three murders were also enough to draw some conclusions on the locations and the weapons the culprit chose. Amy was lying in the middle of a park right now, not even hid behind a tree or anything. As if he wanted her to be found.
“Of course he does..." Valerie mumbled to herself. It seemed to be his or her goal to kill as many of that certain class as possible without getting caught, and as for now, they had done a pretty decent job on that. No traces, no stains, nothing.

She got back to her office only forty-five minutes later, a big cup of coffee in her right hand and a phone number in her left. It was probably rude, but she had indeed tried to call Amy Coris' parents on the ride back home, kind of in passing, but she really wasn't good with that kind of stuff. Amy's parents had always been kind to everyone and so had their daughter. This news would be more than devastating.
Tons of papers were lined up on the desk, but at least neatly. Valerie remembered the last time she had come here to see a complete mess. Right now, it was actually pretty tidy though, but she really did not have any time for all of this. Her current case was getting more and more intense. Sure, people like Jonathan hoped the culprit would be caught soon, but she was more realistic than that. There would be more victims, and if her prediction of who the perpetrator could be was even closely correct, she kind of already knew the pattern of people he would choose.
Even though she had decided not to care about all the papers right now, one of them caught her interest. To Miss Valerie Lovell. The letters were written in a neat handwriting. One would probably suppose it was that of a woman, but more than that, Valerie felt like she had seen it before.
Lost in thoughts, she jumped when someone knocked on her door. Once, twice, thrice. She only knew one person who knocked exactly like this, so she greeted him with: “What is it, Jona?”
He entered with a small, sheepish smile, as if he was surprised that she actually identified him by the way he knocked on the door – even though she had been doing so for the last two years.
“Amy Coris' parents called back.”
She sighed thoroughly and closed her eyes. Great.
“Can't you just tell them...”
“Val. You don't really want to tell them this via phone, do you?”
She sighed again, this time louder, silently begging for patience. Why not? What exactly was it going to change if she told them via phone or personally? It wouldn't change the fact that Amy Coris had been killed and robbed of five fingers of her hand, probably by one of her former classmates and in the middle of a lonesome park.
Did it really matter if Valerie sat in their living room while breaking the matter to them? It wasn't like she had anything positive to tell them. She didn't even know if the girl had been tortured, and if she knew, she was wise enough not to spill such details. Sometimes, a comforting lie was better than the unalterable truth.
“Fine, I'll do it. Tell them I'll be there in an hour.”
Jonathan nodded before leaving the room. This was so not going to be fun.
 
Last edited:

Chuman

Dad of Boy
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
12,699
Age
20
  • Savage Nymph
  • Come So Far
  • Come So Far
  • Come So Far
  • The Gambler of Fate
  • Dandelion
Re: Devoured


i like this. a lot. the premise is intriguing and the chapter is short and sweet. your writing style actually reminds me of my own so i really wish we could collab sometimes.

commander kraut takes charge, WHOO.
 

KingdomKey

The Traveler
Joined
Sep 25, 2010
Messages
6,260
  • Retired Staff
  • Graceful Assassin
  • The Gambler of Fate
  • Beauty Within
  • Cloaked Schemer
  • Whirlwind Lancer
Re: Devoured

This was a fantastic prologue to the story thus far. I wouldn't be too surprised if the next victim had their hand removed. Seems like the loss of fingers has a significance to the killer at large; perhaps a ritual is being preformed or something more disturbing. Say we take the title of this story in literal terms. *shivers* Of course, I already like Valerie for keeping it together as she examines the body and deals with the outcome of having to discuss the tragic loss of someones daughter. As for the killer, if they're going after classmates... hmm, maybe the teacher or someone else that has a personal grudge against them all. I'm really excited to see how this plays out! :D I hope to see more soon! <3
 

VoidGear.

red gay
Joined
Jun 6, 2015
Messages
5,547
Age
24
Location
Germany
  • No Name
  • Put That Thing Back Where It Came From
  • Melodious Nocturne
  • Luna Diviner
  • Cloaked Schemer
  • Chilly Academic
Re: Devoured

Thanks to both of you. :3

@Kitkat

Well, I suppose the title implies things like cannibalism, but it's not gonna be that easy, hehe. Same with the culprit's reason to kill them.
I already got the next chapter semi-finished, soo it won't be that much of a wait. ^-^
 

Chuman

Dad of Boy
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
12,699
Age
20
  • Savage Nymph
  • Come So Far
  • Come So Far
  • Come So Far
  • The Gambler of Fate
  • Dandelion
Re: Devoured

yo voidyroids. i had to go to bed early for my class today but i'll make some more edits tonight.
 

Bufferino

super hyped
Joined
May 28, 2015
Messages
1,363
Location
Gaia
  • Ever Gentle and Kind
  • Fairest of them All
  • Keyblade Master
  • Life is Strange
  • Final Fantasy VII PC
  • In the Grid
Re: Devoured

I haven't read a fanfiction in a while, but this is good. Really good​.
 

VoidGear.

red gay
Joined
Jun 6, 2015
Messages
5,547
Age
24
Location
Germany
  • No Name
  • Put That Thing Back Where It Came From
  • Melodious Nocturne
  • Luna Diviner
  • Cloaked Schemer
  • Chilly Academic
Re: Devoured

Pewwwwwwwww, here is the next chapter.
It didn't get much longer than the prologue, but I'm working on it for the next ones to come. <3

-----------------------------------------------------------

[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Arriving at the Coris' home five minutes early, Valerie decided to check the location as much as she could. Of course it looked like a regular house in quiet surroundings, but something was rather off. There was no telling if the culprit was planning to kill Amy's parents as well. It wasn't too likely, but you could never be sure. Sadly, it was already past 8 pm and thus extremely dark, so there wasn't really much to see.[/FONT]

“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Thanks for accompanying me. This place freaks me out already”, she admitted to Jonathan who was driving the car. He chuckled, but nodded slowly, apparently acknowledging her thanks. It was probably weird for him to see her like this. She was usually calm when dealing with her cases, but this time, she realized her enemy was at least on her level, if not even above that.[/FONT]

“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]You want me to join you in telling them?”, he asked politely, but she could read the displeasure in his eyes, so she shook her head.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Nah. I'll probably get this over with faster without you.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]She got out of the car, looked to the left and to the right as if she were expecting someone to jump out of a bush and kill her right on the spot. Sighing, she glanced back to the car, saw Jonathan sticking his thumb in the air, rolled her eyes at how stupid he looked and continued her way to Amy's parents' house. Taking a deep breath, she counted to ten and then rang the bell. It was merely a few seconds until Amy's mother opened the door, a frightened but rather knowing look on her face. Well, motherly instinct they called it, right?[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Is that you, Valerie? I haven't seen you in years, dear.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]And this was the second she knew this was going to suck lots. Besides the fact that Mrs. Coris still remembered her from the few times she and Amy had been hanging around together, she now probably expected Valerie to feel sadness or indignation at what had happened to Amy.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Come in, come in!”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]She was trying so hard to smile, but it just couldn't reach her eyes. Guiding Valerie to the living room where her husband was already waiting, her mind seemed to be somewhere else. She already knew. Why, was all that Valerie could think. Why do I have to do this even though she already knows?[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]What brings you here? Do you want to drink something, dear?”[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]No, I...I won't be staying long. I apologize. I have been trying to call you earlier, and when you called back, my colleague picked up. As you might have overheard, I'm working for the police now. And more so...the criminal investigation department. It's...about Amy.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]When she stopped talking to let the information sink in, Valerie realized how deadly the silence in the room had become. The light was warm and the temperature engulfing, yet she felt colder than when she had been standing outside the house.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]I am sorry to be the one breaking this to you. Amy has been found earlier tonight in the Victoriapark a few streets from here. She...she is dead.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Everything that happened after she finished this sentence was like a sudden explosion. Amy's mother burst into the tears she had been holding back, broke at the realization that her fears had become the truth. Amy's father was just sitting there, holding his wife in his arms with a hollow expression in his eyes. The information hadn't reached him yet, he couldn't believe, couldn't accept it.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Valerie wouldn't ever spill it, but this view was way harder for her to handle than Amy's death itself. Seeing people who loved the girl like this, heartbroken and unbelieving, as if it were only a nightmare…[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]And what was worst was the fact that Amy's death itself did not concern her at all. How could she be sitting in front of these people who were suffering, yet not care about what had happened in the first place? She felt cruel, awful.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Trying to find an excuse to leave already, she closed her eyes, tried not to listen to the whining because she knew this wasn't the last time she was going to hear parents of people she should probably care about cry, but then…[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Just...tell me”, Amy's mother muttered in between sobs. “Did she...did my baby die peacefully?”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Damn. Valerie hated this part. Of course she didn't know for sure, but she was almost certain the culprit had cut off her fingers while Amy had been alive. She had to lie, didn't she? It was for the better.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]We suppose it was a fast, painless death.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Liar, a voice in her head objected. You know she suffered.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Keeping herself from shaking her head in disbelief, she pressed her lips together, holding Amy's mother's gaze in hopes of this ending soon.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]I know this probably seems rushed to you, but I suppose you really need the time to...think about this. Meanwhile...I promise I am going to find the perpetrator. Even if it's the last thing I'm gonna do.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]With this, she got up, bowed slightly and then left the room without waiting for another word. This probably wasn't the kindest way to treat people, she knew that. But somehow, seeing them suffer like that made her feel extremely uncomfortable. Thinking about it, she had only been part of one other case that included such brutal murder yet. Maybe...maybe she needed time to get used to this.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]The passenger door opened before she had even reached the car. Jonathan looked at her understandingly, with a comforting smile on his face, and grasped her shoulder when she had sat down.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]You're crying, Val.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]She shot him a displeased, hateful gaze.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Thanks a lot, asshole. Think I haven't noticed?”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Indeed, tears were falling down her cheeks and she didn't even understand why. Amy's death didn't concern her personally, right? She wasn't sad. Sadness was...when her grandpa had died, she had been sad. Remembering the feeling, she knew Amy's death was nothing like that to her.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]It's okay. You're starting to realize that you can't feel sorry for everyone, even if you know that person. You're an officer now, so like it or not: You are going to see people die. And you'll have to handle the pain of their bereaved families. It takes some time, but one day, you'll be able to do this without crying.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]If that was supposed to be comforting, it failed miserably. And yet, it was the truth. She was probably going to get used to this one day. Even if that day seemed far away now.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]I suppose you're right. Would you mind getting me home instead of back to the office? I really just want to sleep.”[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Sure, Val.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]They drove slowly and in silence. Bright stars lit the sky and Valerie, looking out of the window, noticed that she liked the sight. It seemed peaceful and quiet – two things she really needed right now. Maybe tomorrow, things would start to make sense. Maybe there would be new clues.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Val? We're here.”[/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]She snapped out of her trance, shaking her head to get rid of the weird, negative thoughts in her head. Coffee and sleep, that was the only thing she needed to think about right now.[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Thanks. I'll see you tomorrow.”[/FONT]
“[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]You better will. Rest. You need it.”[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]She snickered, got out of the car, walked up to the front door and waved back at Jonathan shortly before closing the door behind herself. The floor was empty as usual, but something was off. As if she were being watched.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Stupid, she thought to herself. You're getting paranoid. Already.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]She climbed the stairs to the third floor and entered her apartment. Nothing felt off here, so she finally started to relax. There were letters on the floor which she picked up but didn't observe any further for the moment. Throwing them on the kitchen table, she decided to get some tea instead of coffee. Maybe that was better if she actually wanted to sleep soon.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Setting down the mug on the table in the living room, Valerie threw herself on the sofa. Just a few minutes of rest, that was what she wanted. But then again…[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]How could she be lying there if a killer was only waiting for the right time to kill his next victim? How could she be lying there if she even had an idea who the culprit was? But...no. He would never do that, right?[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Who knows. He's always been a little...weird.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Just when she decided to think about this later tomorrow, realizing that she was getting too paranoid to think straight for the moment, the last thing on earth she wanted to hear late in the evening happened: Her doorbell rang.[/FONT]
 

KingdomKey

The Traveler
Joined
Sep 25, 2010
Messages
6,260
  • Retired Staff
  • Graceful Assassin
  • The Gambler of Fate
  • Beauty Within
  • Cloaked Schemer
  • Whirlwind Lancer
Re: Devoured (Chapter 2 up :3)

I swear, I feel like I'm reading out of a novel right now and I'm spellbound. <3 I do give kudos to Valerie for holding it together in front of Amy's parents. I'm much more intrigued now, because if Valerie knew Amy this opens up the case on a much larger scale. The killer could literally be anyone, depending on the agenda. Heck, even could be closer than we think. I got a theory, but not going to share it for now. Anyways, I really like Valerie a lot, because she's both funny and human. I do ponder who could be at her door; I just hope she checks for who it is first before opening it unless she has a gun. xD
 

VoidGear.

red gay
Joined
Jun 6, 2015
Messages
5,547
Age
24
Location
Germany
  • No Name
  • Put That Thing Back Where It Came From
  • Melodious Nocturne
  • Luna Diviner
  • Cloaked Schemer
  • Chilly Academic
Re: Devoured (Chapter 2 up :3)

I swear, I feel like I'm reading out of a novel right now and I'm spellbound. <3 I do give kudos to Valerie for holding it together in front of Amy's parents. I'm much more intrigued now, because if Valerie knew Amy this opens up the case on a much larger scale. The killer could literally be anyone, depending on the agenda. Heck, even could be closer than we think. I got a theory, but not going to share it for now. Anyways, I really like Valerie a lot, because she's both funny and human. I do ponder who could be at her door; I just hope she checks for who it is first before opening it unless she has a gun. xD
I'm flattered. q.q
I kinda got attached to Valerie in a very short time. I already got several suggestions on who the culprit could be and why he did it. Most were wrong or only semi-right so far, hehe. :D

Those poor parents ;-;
Right?
I wish I could say something around the lines of "phew, luckily they're the only ones going through this in this story!"
 

VoidGear.

red gay
Joined
Jun 6, 2015
Messages
5,547
Age
24
Location
Germany
  • No Name
  • Put That Thing Back Where It Came From
  • Melodious Nocturne
  • Luna Diviner
  • Cloaked Schemer
  • Chilly Academic
Re: Devoured (Chapter 2 up :3)

This story is kinda starting to heavily grow on me. :3

-------------------------------------

Silence flooded the apartment for about ten seconds. Just when Valerie wanted to believe that she had just imagined it though, the doorbell rang a second time. There was someone in front of her door, apparently expecting her to be home and awake at a time like this or maybe...maybe even knowing that she was home and awake.

I'm getting so paranoid, she realized and bit her lip. It sure wouldn't be anyone trying to harm her, right? No thief, no killer. But what if…?
For a second, she actually considered picking up her gun and taking it along just in case. As she was walking up to her cupboard though, she heard what relieved her more than she would admit it.
Valerie? Are you there, dear?”
She sighed in disbelief, rolled her eyes and paused for a moment, taking a few deep breaths. It was just Mrs. Jackson, her overall favorite neighbor. No one even closely trying to harm her. She really was getting paranoid about this.
Realizing that Mrs. Jackson was waiting for her though, she hurried to the door and opened it. She was greeted by a big box...or well, rather Mrs. Jackson carrying a big box, probably a package sent by mail.
Examining as much as she could, Valerie realized that there was nothing even close to a post mark to be found on the unichrome carton. Now that was very, very suspicious, wasn't it?
I am sorry for disrupting you this late in the evening, but the man delivering it wanted me to give it to you as soon as possible.”
Lost in thoughts, she shook her head before objecting.
No, I...thank you. Did the mailman hand it to you?”
She took the package out of Mrs. Jacksons arms, checked it more thoroughly but didn't find even a clue on what it could possibly be. This wasn't good, was it? Maybe her paranoia was more like instinct. This was bad.
No, no! It was a young man who left it in front of my apartment door. Just when I opened, he already turned on his heels, shouted I should give this to you as soon as I can and ran as if he were in an extreme hurry.”

Actually, thinking about it, this wasn't bad at all. It was awful. Of course it still didn't mean that the carton's content was in any way harmful, but at this point, it was hard to deny that something was terribly wrong about this situation.
Phew, okay then. Thank you a lot, sorry you had to rush over this late in the evening.”
It was nothing, dear.”
With the kindest smile in the world, Mrs. Jackson turned on her heel and just when she had entered her own apartment, Valerie slammed the door shut and threw a vicious glance at the package. What was she supposed to do? Just open it? It could even be a bomb, or maybe, hopefully, someone was just playing a very, very evil prank on her for no reason.

She should probably leave it like it was and take it with her to work tomorrow. Snickering, she realized she would never do that. As if she could sleep with this thing in her hallway.

Taking it with her to the kitchen to open it, she simultaneously fished her phone out of her pocket, dialing the 2 – her shortcut for Jonathan. After activating its speaker, she threw the phone on the table, getting a knife to open up the box.
Don't tell me you can't sleep, Val?”
Instead of greeting, Jonathan was actually even teasing her. But she didn't have the time to bring about a quarrel, so she didn't react to it.
Listen, Jona. Just when I wanted to go to sleep and not get paranoid, Mrs. Jackson came over and handed me a package. No post mark. Just a plain, big box. Not too heavy. Not light either. Looks unsuspicious, but I'm telling you something is wrong about this.”
Cutting open the edges, she could feel Jonathan tensing. He was probably even more paranoid than she was already.
Don't open it.”
Already on it. I swear I wouldn't be able to sleep with this shit in my apartment. What if it's a bomb that detonates in like, three hours? That'd explain why the guy delivering it wanted her to hand it over as soon as possible.”
Jonathan started protesting, almost shouting, ordering her to stop opening it at once, but she didn't listen. She needed to prove to herself that this was just some weird coincidence. That this was a harmless, normal package she didn't remember ordering. That she had somehow missed the post mark. She wanted to believe that nothing was wrong.

She didn't know what she had expected. A prank? An "empty" box only filled with something to make it heavier? Maybe even some sort of bomb? Whatever she had expected, nothing came close to what she was greeted with. Completely disregarding the fact that it was late in the evening, she jumped away from the table, screaming loudly.

Val? What the hell? Valerie?! What happened?”
Unable to talk, she just kept shaking her head as if in a Trance, pressed a hand to her mouth trying to keep herself from puking all over the place. This could not be happening.
I...I...”
You, you, you what?! You scared me to death, Val! Don't tell me it really is some sort of bomb in there!”
Why...her…?”
Ignoring Jonathan who was still trying to get answers from her, Valerie reached for the box with shaking hands, moved a little closer again, still hoping that what she had seen was not really lying there.
It's...Liz.”
What is Liz? Who is Liz? Valerie, if you don't start making sense this instant, I'll be there in less than fifteen minutes, I swear it!”
Liz! Liz Franklin, one of my closest friends back in school! It's her freaking torn off head in a box lying on my kitchen table with dead eyes piercing my goddamn soul, Jonathan! This shit is crazy, this cannot be happening!”
Her voice had reached a pitch she hadn't even known she was capable of. Storming out of the kitchen to get away from this disaster, she realized there hadn't been a reply. Actually, it sounded like Jonathan wasn't even there anymore.

Valerie sighed. She really hadn't wanted to keep him from getting the sleep they both needed, but...what the hell was going on here? Shooting anxious glances through her rooms, she wouldn't even be surprised if someone was hiding in here, waiting to kill her next or at least scare her to death with even more than just a…
Just a head?
She let herself sink on her bed after she had checked every room thoroughly. No, now that she thought about it, of course it wasn't just a head. Liz had died, probably shortly before Amy, and her head was now lying in Valerie's apartment like some sort of...present. That was not only grotesque but disgusting. Who would do something like that and why?

Only twenty minutes later, she and Jonathan were both standing in the kitchen, the box still in front of them, untouched.
We should hand this in immediately. And ask your neighbor about every detail she remembers. Val, I know this isn't easy for-”
Don't even start! You know nothing about all this! Liz...I haven't seen her in a while, but we have still been close friends. And now...Imagine what that sick bastard did to her!”
Shaking his head, Jonathan grabbed her hand.
That's exactly what I won't and you shouldn't do. That won't help Liz or anyone else at all. What you do need to do is focus and catch whoever did all this.”
She shot him an evil glare, but still knew he was right. If she kept a cool head, they would settle all of this eventually, and she would be the one to bring at least a little bit of justice to all those people who had died, that she swore to herself.
Right. I...I'm gonna close her eyes, then we can at least check if there's more in it before we hand it in the forensics.”
She got up to get a disposable glove – luckily she kept those about everywhere – before walking up to the table again. To be honest, she usually wasn't shocked by corpses that much, but Liz' head was so...disgusting like this.
Pulling herself together, Valerie actually managed to find Liz' forehead without looking and closed her eyes gently before looking down. Her visible throat still looked awful, but other than that, Valerie didn't feel like puking anymore.
I'm sorry, Liz. I wish this wouldn't have happened”, she said to no one in particular before noticing there was in fact more in the box than Liz' head.
A letter?”
She picked it up and turned to Jonathan who didn't seem eager to get any closer than needed. Valerie wasn't sure what she expected from the letter, but maybe it'd give her some sort of direction. Was the killer trying to give her a present? Or rather freak her out in the weirdest way? Maybe this even was his way of saying “you're next”.
She opened the envelope and, unlike Jonathan who grimaced, wasn't surprised that the words were written with blood.

Unlike Liz, I always preferred manhunt over hide and seek.
Let's see who of us is the hunter and who the prey.

 

KingdomKey

The Traveler
Joined
Sep 25, 2010
Messages
6,260
  • Retired Staff
  • Graceful Assassin
  • The Gambler of Fate
  • Beauty Within
  • Cloaked Schemer
  • Whirlwind Lancer
Re: Devoured (Chapter 3)

Damn, this got dark real fast. It's a good thing I ate dinner earlier and mentally prepared myself for what would likely be in the box. I guess this means whoever the young man was to deliver it already knew the contents of it and plans on hunting Valerie soon. I am curious how old both Jona and Valerie happen to be though. Of course, it still sucks seeing Liz, an actual close friend to Valerie be the next victim. Otherwise, this was an awesome chapter and I loved every minute of it.
 

Bufferino

super hyped
Joined
May 28, 2015
Messages
1,363
Location
Gaia
  • Ever Gentle and Kind
  • Fairest of them All
  • Keyblade Master
  • Life is Strange
  • Final Fantasy VII PC
  • In the Grid
Re: Devoured (Chapter 3)

HOLY SHIT!
HOLY SHIT!

SHIT GOT REAL... AND THAT ENDING!

Nice work, Void.
 

VoidGear.

red gay
Joined
Jun 6, 2015
Messages
5,547
Age
24
Location
Germany
  • No Name
  • Put That Thing Back Where It Came From
  • Melodious Nocturne
  • Luna Diviner
  • Cloaked Schemer
  • Chilly Academic
Re: Devoured (Chapter 3)

I am curious how old both Jona and Valerie happen to be though.
It's gonna be "revealed" later for plot reasons, but since it's not really a heavy spoiler I can already tell you: Jonathan is 28 and Valerie is 23 at this point of the story.
This will of course have certain influence on the story later on. :)
 

Anagram

Banned
Joined
Mar 9, 2008
Messages
5,685
Re: Devoured (Chapter 3)

I like my stories like my coffe- wait, no. I actually prefer my coffee as light as possible.
I'll try not to rush it. :p
I find rushing fine if it's done well personally. Just do as you feel works best. =w=
 
Top