... ugh.
So you're here talking about how you were - what, abused? Mistreated, at least - by someone who was affected by addiction, and of all things in someone else's thread about an almost entirely different topic. And then you come in here talking about how much you hate yourself and how nothing helps you.
Oh God.
First, you're a mess, and that shrink is a loser and isn't doing his/her job right. Second, before you go off saying how I don't "understand your situation" or any of that bs, I've been in nearly the same one with my step-father. One day he comes home drunk, beats on my mom ... then while speeding away, runs into a tree. But here's the thing; I don't hate him at all for it, and neither does my mother. When he's sober, he's an extremely nice guy.
I don't blame alcohol for any of his actions, and I'm not here ranting about how alcohol is the devil's spawn. In most situations, it's just fine. Most of the time, same goes for a number of drugs. I won't even begin to talk about how you're generalizing drug users, either.
tl;dr: You're not the only one who's experienced anything like that. In this case, you're nothing special. Please, for the sake of all that is good, stop hating on yourself. Nothing good will come of it. And please stop uselessly bitching in someone else's thread. If you must, make your own.
Bye-bye.
Morning rant, sorry.