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Chuck Norris Jokes



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The Key Chain

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Mar 30, 2007
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I really love them. I wanna hear all of them! so here are the ones I have heard:

Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch, he decides what time it is
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits
Guns don't kill people, Chuck Norris kills people.
Chuck Norris went to the Virgin Islands, now they're just the Islands.
When Chuck Norris speaks, everyone listins, and dies.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice
Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk and kill.
Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting... He goes killing

POST THE ONES YOU KNOW. :thumbsup:
 

Vayne Mechanics

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Mar 27, 2005
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  • East Meets West
  • In the Grid
  • Retired Staff
That Hagen Daz ice cream is sooo gooooooooooood.

Also Harry Osbourne's pie.
 

System Shock

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May 5, 2006
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Rockford, Illinois.
Jesus walks on water, Chuck Norris swims through land.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father.

Some people flirt with danger, Chuck Norris has sex with danger and then roundhouse kicks it in the face.

Chuck Norris gives Freddy nightmares!

Who would win a fight between Batman and Darth Vader? Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't use a razor to shave his beard, he roundhouse kicks himself in the face because the only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris!

Chuck Norris was denied breakfast at McDonalds at 10:31 a.m. so he roundhouse kicked it so hard it became a Wendy's.

When Chuck Norris tells a knock-knock joke the whole world answers.

To Chuck Norris, difficult takes a day, impossible takes a week.

God said "LET THERE BE LIGHT!" Chuck Norris said "Say please."

Chuck Norris could eat a mixed up Rubix Cube and poop it out solved.

Chuck Norris can close a revolving door.

Chuck Norris lathers and rinses. He doesn't repeat.

Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11...suicide.

The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out.

Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

Chuck Norris frequently knits sweaters, and by knits I mean kicks and by sweaters I mean babies.
 
T

Tyler Durden

Guest
Seconded.


And Silh is not always right. He is just a lowly chat mod.
 
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