What's new

Welcome to Kingdom Hearts Insider

Join us now to get access to all our features. Once registered and logged in, you will be able to create topics, post replies to existing threads, give reputation to your fellow members, get your own private messenger, and so, so much more. It's also quick and totally free, so what are you waiting for?

Ask question

Ask Questions and Get Answers from Our Community

Ask a Mod

Ask Questions from your staff

Contact Staff

If you need additional information or have a concern please contact us.

  • Hello everybody! We have tons of new awards for the new year that can be requested through our Awards System thanks to Antifa Lockhart! Some are limited-time awards so go claim them before they are gone forever...

    CLICK HERE FOR AWARDS

Help/Support ► Best friend?



REGISTER TO REMOVE ADS
Status
Not open for further replies.

UnknownEnigma

New member
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
648
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Elsewhere
Hello everyone! Okay well just generally asking first-----What are your thoughts on best friends, dating them, liking them, or deciding you might as well stop? Just general.

Now to me problem...well to summarize a long and boring story, me and my best fiend , of 10 years now i think, havnt been the greatest but who is actually? So we have come to the whole "date my best friend"??? phase and it turns out she doesnt see us getting together anytime soon, while i have been waiting since like 5th grade, so now i dont want to ignore her but i really do need time to bounce back from this terrible heartbreak....sure you say she should understand but she wont, she'll take it as a omen we are going to stop being friends soon, and im not ok with her thinking that but if thats what it takes for me to get around then i guess so but my question is....am i being selfish? is all of this selfishness? thanks for the anwsers anyone....been a tough month ha
 

Sonja~Soulheart

Speed lvl- snail
Joined
Feb 3, 2007
Messages
1,529
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Age
28
Location
Where angels lose their way
Website
alichinorinoa.deviantart.com
uhm... maybe she just feels she's not ready with the whole 'ure my best friend since like forever and i want to date you' thing.

try talkng and seeing each of your views about the whole topic. if it doesnt help.. get proffesional advice.. a.k.a someone you know to have passed the same epidemic.
 

mesmerized

New member
Joined
May 4, 2007
Messages
658
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Sin City
i dated my best friend, he was actually my first "love" However, our relationship didn't go to well because generally people are different bf/gf then they are just friends. For example, as a friend I was very trusting and understanding. On the other hand, when it comes to boyfriends, I can be EXTREMELY jealous. He went out with 2 of his female friends who I had never met and I went off. Now, if he was just my best friend that would have never happened. So our relationship lasted for a shady 6 months. He ended up leaving me, but after a few months I found my TRUE LOVE and I've been dating him for almost a year now.

So, never again will I date my best friend. The after effects are amazing, you realize the person they truly beyond the whole best friend thing. If your best friend is really the person you think you know he is.. then go with it. I found out mine was a cheater butthole.

Bottom line, FOLLOW YOUR HEART it will never lead you wrong. [[Even if you think it has, theres always a reason beyond failure. I.E. what happened after he dumped me lol]]

If you ever need to talk feel free to PM me =]
 

Princess of KH

New member
Joined
Jul 3, 2007
Messages
281
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
my inner universe
I think if you really like your best friend, you should let them know. You're not being selfish just because you want to date your best friend. But if she doesn't want to go out, then don't pressure her about it. People hate that. Just make sure you stay friends. It's not borth breaking a freindship over the fact that your best friend doesn't want to go out right now. I have a friend that was friends w/ her bf for around three years before they started dating. They started dating in high school, & now she's a senior in college & her bf is now her fiance' who graduated from college last year. They were friends for a long time before they started dating, & look where they are now. Just be a good friend, & it should be ok!
 
Joined
Oct 12, 2005
Messages
684
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Tailing Ichigo, following his many exploits!
Website
z6.invisionfree.com
Ok, first of all, im just gonna tell you a similar event. One of my friends comes up to me, and he says that he likes me, and he wants to go out. But, i can only see him as a friend, and that would be it. But you never know, it depends according to the person. If you're sure you know her like you do, and if you're sure that she likes you just as much, you can pull it off.

But, maybe to her, it would seem strange and she may not even picture it happening, because you too have known each other for so long. And suddenly you come up to her and ask her out, she'd be a bit '....okaay...'

But if she knows that you do feel that certain way, you two should talk and have a conversation about it. See where it'll go. Or if you want, you can just wing it like bond of flames and just simply ask her out.

The choice is yours really =]
 

blinkboy211

A boy nobody owns
Joined
Apr 16, 2007
Messages
6,313
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Age
34
Location
St. Louis
Ok first just try to talk to her first like what gunblade_gurl08 said. its best to talk about it more often then not and maybe then you will understand. And if she still doesnt want to then dont push it like some others said. It could ruin a friendship. There are other girls out there.

I mean i really not one to give advice on this though cause i had 3 best friends and two were girls. dated one she broke up with me then dated the other. broke up with her and dated the first girl again. then broke up with her and now with the 2nd girl and well i really found the girl i love. (of course i dated alot of other girls before i went for friends and maybe best thing to do before getting closer to friends)
 

TheLastKnight

You Swear To Listen
Joined
Apr 15, 2007
Messages
2,181
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Website
s9.invisionfree.com
Well, I'd say if she doesn't want to, don't talk her into something she doesn't want to do, but DON'T stop being friends, I swear, you'll look back on this, and laugh in a few years

trust me, I have friends that are women, but never actually had a gf, doesn't mean I'm gay...just means that I'm friendly, I was actually thinking of asking one of them out sometime...
 

+JodieTakira+

New member
Joined
Jun 23, 2007
Messages
54
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Pennsylvania, USA
Dating your best friend is very risky, if you ask me. It's not necessarily bad if it works out. In fact, it could probably turn into the best relationship you've ever had. But on the other hand, it could really crash and you may even lose your friend. It sort of happened to me. I still have the burns at this point in my life.

I think a lot of it depends on just how well you know each other. If you talk as deep as revealing secrets you wouldn't even tell your other friends, siblings, or parents and you've accepted each other's flaws, then go for it. If not, I wouldn't be so prompt to get into a relationship.

If she really doesn't want to be in a relationship with you, it's best to accept that fact and perhaps hope one day she might change her mind. Or move on. Just don't get to the point that you're stalking her to be your girl. There's nothing wrong with loving someone and wanting to be with them. But at the same time you have to think about the other's happiness. You wouldn't want to have someone in a relationship with you out of guilt, you know? That's my two cents at any rate.
 

UnknownEnigma

New member
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
648
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Elsewhere
Well i recently went to a party with her, she completly ignored me and i her, not even a hi. i know i shouldve done effort on my part but she did nothing whatsoever! and no i hadnt asked her out yet even though i said she could be my pretend gf cause my moms side of the family came and were expecting someone with me....then i sorta said she was done with her duty " ", so yeah imma talk with her
 

Lycanthrope

Gold Member
Joined
Dec 28, 2006
Messages
6,318
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Awards
1
Age
28
Location
flip-a-del-phi-a
Its depends, UE. I asked one of my best friends thats a girl out once... we went out for about a month, and it was rather awkward at times. It was a great month, but an awkward one at that.
 

UnknownEnigma

New member
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
648
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Elsewhere
Well dont worry, all types of communication are cut off with her, shes blocked, call rejected, all that fun stuff. this seems like a good day
 

UnknownEnigma

New member
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
648
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Elsewhere
Sorry to bring this topic back up, but i dont think i shouldve stopped talking to her and all now. I mean i was (hopefully still am?) her best friend and if she stopped talking to me, and i stopped tlaking to her because she stopped talking to me.....now what?
 

OmniChaos

The Smiling Man
Staff member
Joined
Feb 14, 2006
Messages
5,652
Reaction score
0
Points
36
Awards
12
Location
Panopticon
UE, I personally would try to patch things up with her... What is happening right now (the silence thing) isn't the best of signs... You should go up to her and set things right... You could still try to date her, but I, personally, would rather not take the risk of loosing a good friend...
 

UnknownEnigma

New member
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
648
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Elsewhere
the dating idea is back in the bottom of the box, but i did IM her last night. i coudl tell she did not want to talk as she used 5 words or less lol. so yeah i tried, it takes 2, so now we wait i suppose
 

Dant?s de Divinity

Bronze Member
Joined
Aug 13, 2007
Messages
1,910
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
On a hill in a white dress waiting for my dearest
Okay dude let me tell you a story. (Oh God Xi don't) dont worry I wont go grandpa on you. Okay when I was a kid in mid and High school I was in love with my best friend her name was Jacky. I never told her... and there has not been a day when I dont think ''What if...'' We lost touch when I was 22 and well go for it dude and if it dose not work out that just means you guys are better friends then lovers. Go for it dude!
Oh and dont say
bowchickawowwow
 

gottaluvkh1992

Koudelka's Servant
Joined
Jul 14, 2007
Messages
1,147
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
In the world of Shadow Hearts
I wouldn't cuz it would ruin your friendship, i told my friend i liked him (im a boy as well) and i have told my other friend i liked her as well (yes i am bi sexual) and the girl acted really strange and wouldn't talk to me and was uncomfortably, when the boy who is straight seemed fine with it
 

Jopari

New member
Joined
May 28, 2007
Messages
805
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Alright, dating friends has to be awkward, but not telling them how you feel really gets tiring because you never state your true feelings. So, tell her, but be prepared for an awkward and sorta devastating after effect, especially if she doesn't feel the same.

I told my best friend how I felt about her and we stayed friends despite the fact that she thinks of me as a brother only. You learn to deal with it and even if you don't change how you feel you'll be better off. Of course, shortly after I told her we had a bit of a falling out. It took a bit of work and discussion but we're still good friends and talk quite often.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
shape1
shape2
shape3
shape4
shape5
shape6
Top