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Fanfiction ► A Love Gone, but Never Forgotten



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NYC16

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Ava was beginning to go on with her life. Not everything was normal yet but slowly it became what she would call sane. She still met with Paul, not as much because he was on call alot of the time, and she was busy herself. She never heard from Dwain again, and considered it a miracle that he never wrote back. She didn't worry about him because she knew he was fine and happy. She herself wanted to be happy, so she continued meeting Paul even when she told herself not to. Tonight she was going to meet him and she was kind of excited. It had been a few weeks since she had sent the letter to Dwain so she considered this her fresh start. Paul was a wonderful guy and really cared for her, and that's what she wanted. Frannie walked in the room as Ava was folding some sheets. "Good morning Ava.", she said with a smile. "Good morning Frannie. What's the agenda for today?", she said looking at the pile of cloth. "Oh you know the usual save lives and such.", she laughed. "I know I hear you.", Ava laughed. "You seem extra happy today.", Frannie said with a big grin. "Sometimes it's nice to be happy. It's refreshing.", Ava looked at Frannie. She wished she could tell her dear friend about Paul, but was afraid she'd never understand. It was something she would just have to keep to herself. "Well I will see you later.", Frannie said with a quick smile and then she left. Ava sighed as she finished folding another sheet.

Dinner had been over for a while now and most of the day nurses were heading off to sleep. Ava waited until she saw Frannie's light go out. She wrapped her shaw around her and headed out the back door. Tonight the moon was high in the sky and she could see clearly. She had made it to their place where she saw him standing waiting for her. She walked up to him and hugged him. She looked up at him with her big brown eyes, "Hello.", she said and smiled. "Hello. You look lovely.", he said with a smile. He kissed her forehead. "Ava, we need to talk.", he said looking down at her. "Yes?", she said still looking up at him. "I need to know something, do you want to be with me?", he said. "Why do you ask?", she didn't really know what to say. "Ava, I love you and I want to marry you one day. Will you be waiting for me when this is over?", he said, she could see the love he had for her in his eyes. "Yes.....I will wait.", she wiped the tear from his cheek. They kissed, holding one another close. "Will you marry me?", her heart was jumbled, her feelings were fluttering. "When you and I can be together in peace, then yes I will marry you." They kissed one last time. "I must be going, it's getting late.", she said looking up. "Goodbye my love." He looked down at her. She let go of his hand as she walked away into the night.
 

NYC16

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Another month had passed as Ava went on with her life, she never slowed down. She continued her work and went to see Paul as often as she could and never again wrote a letter to Dwain. More soldiers came and went, more tears had been shed, and many more would. She got to talk to her little boy who learned to talk very well, and would be one soon. She was suprised at how soon he started to talk, saying words like mama, pap, and mamma. She was thinking about how long it had been since she last saw Lucas' face. She remembered his face like he was there beside her. She missed him very much and would gladly give up anything to be with him like they had planned. He was her one true love and she would never forget him or the love they shared. She wished that he would have gotten to see their son and watch him grow. Her mother sent her photos of little Luke and her brother at the baseball field. Ava would catch herself smiling now and then, because she was remembering what was, and what she would find when she went home to be with her family. Ava wasn't sure what she would do when the war was over and she was free to be with her son. She knew Paul wanted to marry her and start a life, and she found herself growing closer to him every time they met, but she could never love him as much as she loved Lucas. Paul knew how much Ava loved Lucas, and would never try to take the place of him. Paul was a kind and considerate person when it came to Ava. Ava wondered what her life would be like if she was to be with Paul in the end. Would she be truly happy? She didn't know. As she continued her thoughts Frannie came downstairs to the laundry room. "Ava are you in here?", She could hear Frannie wandering around. "Yes I am.", Ava continued to fold more sheets and blankets. "Ava we need to talk.", Frannie's face was serious, this startled Ava. "What's the matter Frannie?" "Ava I know you've been sneaking out to meet that German man. He has sent you another letter. You need to end this.", Frannie's face was stern. "Frannie, let me explain. Paul saved me from being killed with hundreds of others. He's a kind man, I'm sorry Frannie.", Ava looked at her friend. "Ava why would you want to be around him, especially under the circumstances?", she continued her worried but stern look. "Frannie, I don't know why I decided to meet him in the first thing. There's something about him, I cant explain it.", Ava tried to find the words. "Ava, you know I love and care about you. I'm worried that you might be making a huge mistake here. Just because you've lost Lucas, doesnt' mean you should give up on Dwain. He's not married yet, you need to tell him how you feel. Don't settle for this.", Frannie gripped Ava's hand. "Are you saying that Paul isnt' good enough, and that DWain is somehow? Dwains' heart is with Emma, and you need to accept that. He gave up on me and what we could have been. He didn't wait, and I am happy that he decided to love someone. I was a fool and didn't tell him then, but that's my cross to bear. All things happen for a reason.", Ava wished that her best friend would understand. "Ava, I know you still love Dwain, I know. But dont' sell yourself short just to find a love that doesn't make sense. He's German Ava. Even if you were to love this Paul, how could you two ever be together in a world that hates the idea?", "Love never makes sense Frannie. I just have to go with it. Please understand. I trust you Frannie with all my heart. Please, dont' say anything.", Ava pleaded. "I promise I won't say a word, but please promise me Ava that you will be careful.", Frannie held tightly to Ava's hand. "I will.", Ava reassured her friend. The two hugged and Frannie left the room. Ava looked at the envelope that Frannie had left her. It was from Paul, she opened it and read it. He said that he would be gone again soon, so they needed to meet again soon. Ava sighed once more and thought about it for a second. She was thinking if she should go, but of course her heart would tell her to go. It always won, even when she didn't want it to.

Ava waited again until the hospital went to asleep, she went to Frannie's room. "Frannie, I'm going to meet him.", she peered in. "Alright, be careful.", her friend responded. Ava creapt out of the building and into the night. She was there now and waited to see him. He wasn't there at the moment, so she waited, holding herself from the cold. She heard someone walking towards her, out of the woods, Paul came. They smiled at one another. He came closer to her and kissed her passionately. After their lips parted, he looked down at her. "I'm going to miss you. I want to give you something.", he looked down and took her hand. He slid a small gold ring onto her finger. It was very old she could tell. "It was my mother's. This is the engagement ring, well sort of. I promise to be true to you while I am gone. One day I want us to get married. ", he said holding her close. Ava was taken back by his words and the ring on her hand. "It's beautiful Paul, but...", he stopped her. "Please take it, if you don't feel like you should wear it out in the public, I understand, but please take it." She remembred the ring that Lucas was going to give her. It was so similar. She shuddered, at the thought. She wore Lucas' ring around her neck, she never took it off. Now she had another ring, from another man that loved her. "I will keep it.", she looked up at him. He kissed her forehead. They kissed again, the passion rising in them. Before it started to get deeper, Ava contradicted herself again, would she go where this was headed or stop herself? Her heart beated harder as the thoughts began to fill her mind. She felt his fingertips on her shoulders, and she could slip into his arms and be lost. She tried to keep her composure, trying to keep her mind in one spot. They continued to kiss, and again she started to lose herself. All of a sudden memories started to fil her mind. The first time she had been in this situation was with Lucas. She felt herself starting to give. She still had his ring around her neck and it was like a burden right now. Then without any warning, Dwain's face popped into her mind. "Paul, we can't. I can't.", she looked up at him. He looked down at her, "Im sorry.", he let her up from the ground. "I'm sorry Paul, this brings back things. I'm not ready for this again.", Ava covered her shoulder. Paul stood up beside her, "I know, I'm sorry.", he took her in his arms. "I love you, I didn't mean for this to happen". "I know. I know." They hugged and said their goodbyes. She walked back to the hospital still with the ring on her hand.
 

NYC16

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okay I am going to fast forward a little

It had been almost a year since she last saw Dwain. She wondered how he was doing, he didnt' try to write her again. Little Luke was over a year now and she looked at the pictures taken of him at his birthday party. She smiled all the time when she saw his face. She wished she could have been there to see him grow and watch him blow out his candles. She did get to talk to him, and she often laughed with him as he chatterd away. Her mother said she showed Luke Ava's picture everyday so he would remember her. She missed them dearly and wanted to be close. She thought of Paul, who she hadn't seen in so long since he had to be transferred, but they frequently wrote each other. She felt like she might be falling in love with him, but she held her breath. It never ended the way she hoped so she didn't say anything. She still agreed to marry him when the time was right. It seemed like the right thing to do for her. She didn't think about her feelings for Dwain as much anymore. They were fading away like his words in those letters. She was happy for him and didn't want to change anything she had given up. She wanted to leave only good thoughts for Dwain and Emma. Ava felt content in her life at the moment. Her son was healthy, she would always be Lucas' true love, and one day she would be Paul's bride. For once it seemed so much simplier. She was really happy with all she had, and she thought this was it for her. But it was only the beginning. She just couldn't see what was going to happen.
 

NYC16

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Thank you, I appreciate the compliments

Dwain looked out the window, he sighed as he watched the people hustle around, trying to get done their busy days. Emma was out with a friend she met in London, they were going to shop and look for a wedding dress. She was so excited about the wedding and what they would do after they got married. Dwain couldn't help but think of what Ava was doing right this moment. He knew she didn't want him to write her anymore, so he abided by her wishes. He missed talking to her and hearing her laugh. Those were the things he missed the most. But he gave his heart to Emma, and couldn't back out now. Ava didn't want him, so he agreed to remain Emma's. His parents were trilled that he was finally settling down, and made his mind up to start a new life. They never truly wanted him to go into the service anyway, but 'he knew he had t. Plus he never would have met Emma, or his heart be captivated by Ava. Dwain decided it was time to go out into town, and make himself feel happy.
 

NYC16

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Emma and her friend returned with bags upon bags of stuff for the wedding. They were both so giddy with delight. She thought that Dwain would be here but then realized he must have gone out for awhile. She shrugged her shoulders as she put her bags down. They sat down on the small sofa and drank hot tea, discussing the future things in store for her. Dwaine sat in the bar across from his apartment. He continued to drink away his feelings, only thinking about the simple things. He was feeling drunk, but he didn't feel like going home. The bartender poured another beer and set it in front of him. "You're alright right?", the bartender asked. "Yeah I am alright.", Dwain said looking at the wall. "Okay buddy, well don't get to hung over.", the bartender said shaking his head. Dwain laughed at the comment. He figured it was getting late, so he finished his drink and stumbled out of bar. He squinted at the lights surrounding him. He saw that his apartment lights were off. He knew Emma was probably asleep, so he would have to be careful going in.
 

dark invader

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No! Please don't let anything bad happen to Dwain! Even though he still loves Ava, and thinks he will never see her again doesn't mean something bad has to happen to him!! And I love the way Ava's love life is turning out, mysterious and blind sighted. I don't know why, but it keeps me continually checking in to the story! Hope to see another update soon!!
 

NYC16

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Thanks guys!!!!!! I am really glad you all enjoy the chapters. Don't wory dark invader, nothing is going to happen to Dwain, at least not to my knowledge yet.Haha.

Ava fell asleep to a song in her mind. It was a song that Lucas and she danced to at their high school dance. She remembered everything about that night perfectly. She could picture his face exactly as it had been. His blue eyes looked at her deeply, his brown hair in perfect shape. She could still smell his cologne, and still saw the faded flannel shirt he wore on his farm. It was a moment that she would never forget. It was their eleventh grade dance, they never went to prom, but that didn't matter. That dance was as good as any to them. It still was special and romantic all the same. They danced all night, looking at each other and smiling. Ava was so happy in her thoughts, she never wanted to wake up.

Dwain opened his apartment door quietly trying not to wake Emma up. As he walked towards his room, the lamp came on. He was so suprised by the light he tripped over one of the bags. "Emma, you're up.", he said with suprise. "Yes, I've been waiting for hours for you to come home.", she said looking sternly at him. Her blond hair fell around her shoulders, and her skin looked even softer than usual. "I'm sorry dear, I was just out for awhile and lost track of time.", he said knowing how guilty he looked. "You were drinking, I can smell it from here.", she had her arms crossed as she sat in bed. "I really am sorry.", he tried to be as apologetic as he could be. "Im going back to sleep.", she turned off the lamp. He stood there in the dark, as he listened to her breath softly.
 

Haku

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Aw awesome ending to the chapter, it really left me wanting to read more.
 

NYC16

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Ava went to town that day to get some vegetables from the local stand. It was nice to see a different view from time to time. Ava wore Paul's ring on her right hand. She believed she could be happy with Paul and decided to think about the good times in her life. She stopped thinking about the should haves and the could have beens. She missed Dwain, but knew he would be in good hands with Emma. She didnt' want to live unhappy anymore. She needed to feel like there was more to life than what was physically there, and look beyond it. She was able to walk down the busy street and smile for the first time in so long. Ava would have her new life, she would be able to laugh again and accept the fact that life wasn't always what you imagined it, but sometimes was better. She was going to keep her word and wait for Paul, she wasn't sure how long it would be until he returned but she was going to be ready when he came back to her.

Paul woke up with a pounding headache and he could hardly see, his eyes were so blurry. He saw that Emma must have gotten up earlier. He walked over to the bedroom to see the bed made. He rubbed his eyes, and turned. There was a letter sitting on the table. He walked slowly over to the table and picked the letter up.

Dwain,
I went out for awhile. I need to think about some things. I feel I'm being pushed aside, and that for some reason you're dealing with something. I'm sorry if you feel I don't understand, it's because you won't give me the chance.I don't know if you can fully love me, without spacing yourself. Sometimes you look at me, but don't really look at me. You need time yourself, to decide if it's me you want. I will be here to help you, but you have to want my help first. I hope you choose me, but that's up to you. I will see you tomorrow, have a nice day. I love you.

Emma


Dwain crumbled the letter in his hand as he let it fall to the ground. He sat down on the chair, and held his head with his hand. Ava's face came to his mind. He shook his head, he wished he didn't do this to himself. He couldn't let Emma walk out of his life, but he couldn't let go of Ava in his heart.

Ava passed the money to the little old woman "Have a good day.", Ava smilied. The little old woman smiled back. She placed the vegetables in her basket and she made her trip back to the hospital. She looked around her, it was the little things she never had noticed before that caught her eye. There could be serenity in a place that had been destroyed. Life could continue after the storm. She smiled as she walked back to the hospital.
 

NYC16

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Thanks Haku, I am glad you continue reading


The wedding plans were coming together better. Dwain and Emma made up their minds that they could overcome a little dispute. They decided to go back and visit one last time before their wedding. Dwain's heart fluttered at the idea of seeing Ava again. They weren't sure when they were going to go back but it would be before they took their vows.

Ava waited day in and day out for Paul to come back or even send a letter. It had been so long since she had seen him or even touched his hand. She had become very attached to him over time, and hated being without him. She wasn't sure what would become of them once the war was over but she didn't really want to think of the obstacles she faced. She wondered from time to time how Dwain was getting along, and if he was ready to get married. She was happy for him and wished him the best of luck. Ava always called home lately to hear how little Luke was getting along. He was getting teeth and making lots of silly conversation. He chattered about all sorts of things, about his big uncle and baseball. She was suprised at what he could talk about at his age, but she knew he had his daddy's genetics. Lucas was always very intelligent, and she was happy Luke turned out like him. Her brother was taking good care of little Luke, and was trying to be the man in Luke's life. Ava was happy she had her brother around to take care of Luke when she was gone.

Dwain looked at the pictures in the magazine. He was sitting in a dress store outside London so his sister and the rest of the bridemaids could get fitted for their dresses. He was bored out of his mind and hoped that he could get away, but the girls pulled him in. He could hear them all chattering about what the flowers were going to look like, he laughed to himself. He was suprised at how soon he and Emma had fallen in love and decided to get married. He sometimes changed his mind about the matter but always found a reason to go back to his plan. He wished he had Ava there with him to talk to when he was bored or when he was lonely. He would try to change his thoughts to something else, but it rarely worked. So he countinued to look through the fashion magazines of the time, flipping the pages of his life.
 

NYC16

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Frannie had been seeing on of the doctors at the hospital. They had been together for a short period but felt like that was it. They felt they were meant for each other. After lunch one afternoon the two were outside when he knealt down on one knee and asked Frannie to marry him. She said yes and he slipped the small ring on her finger. He had been saving it since his mother gave it to him. It was for his bride she had told him. Frannie was filled with delight as she ran to Ava to tell her the news. Ava was fixing up the bandage on a patients leg. Frannie grabbed Ava's arm, "I have to tell you the best news." Ava was startled and turned to see Frannie glowing with happiness. "What is it?", she said. Frannie lifted her hand so Ava could see it. "Isn't it beautiful?", she had stars in her eyes. "Of course. I am so happy for you.", the two embraced. "Thank you so much.", then Frannie's face grew sad. "What's amatter?", Ava looked at her. "It's just......Dwain and Emma, and I wasn't sure how you felt. I'm sorry I didn't think.", Frannie looked down. "Oh dear, it's fine. I'm okay I promise, besides this is your moment, be as happy as you want.", she held Frannie's hand. Frannie smiled as she moved away. "I must go, but I will see you at dinner?", "Yes go ahead and spread the news.", Ava smiled. Frannie left the room, and Ava stood there looking at the wall.
 

NYC16

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Frannie was full of hapiness, she was jitterly walking around with a smile all the time. Ava was truly happy for her friend. but wished for the same happiness for herself. She watched her friend now as she talked with her new fiance. Ava smiled when Frannie turned and looked at her. She turned and walked outside for a little air. She watched as the raindrops began to fall. The mail carrier walked up to her and handed her the mail. She looked through them and found a letter from Paul. She walked to a spot out of the rain to open it.

My dearest Ava,

It will be longer than I thought. It may be a year until we can be together again, I know how hard it may be to accept that. I had a dream about you the other night, you were wearing a dress and you had flowers in your hair. You were dancing under the sun, smiling at me. I want that dream to be a reality. I think about you often, and wish I could be near you. I miss the way your hair smells and the way your eyes shine in the moonlight. Please remember how much I love you, and never forget me. For you will never be forgotten to me, you live on in my mind and in my heart. Please wait for me.

I will love you always,
Paul
 

Haku

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Very interesting chapters, but nevertheless great job though.
 
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