• Hello everybody! We have tons of new awards for the new year that can be requested through our Awards System thanks to Antifa Lockhart! Some are limited-time awards so go claim them before they are gone forever...

    CLICK HERE FOR AWARDS

Guys, he's real... JESUS IS REAL!



REGISTER TO REMOVE ADS
Status
Not open for further replies.

Trimms

New member
Joined
Oct 14, 2008
Messages
385
So I had an interesting conversation with a girl today.

She told me that Jesus spoke to her. He whispered in her heart. It was a soft soothing voice, which she described to be like a meeker version of my flamboyantly gay band teacher's voice. Right.

So I ask her what Jesus told her, and she said that he told her where to find something. She said that she had this sort of whisper deep in her heart, and she knew it was Jesus. So naturally, my curiosity led me to ask her what exactly she was looking for.

Her mother's $12. So apparently, Jesus whispered to her in her heart, in a flamboyantly gay voice, where her mother's twelve dollars were. What, did he say "look under the couch cushions?"

D':
 

Vossler

I'll Be His Successor
Joined
Oct 7, 2008
Messages
8,159
Age
30
Location
Italy
Well I know he is real I have been spoken from Jesus many times and did she find the 12$ where Jesus said it was.
 

Reika Noko

Forever lurking
Joined
Sep 26, 2008
Messages
1,204
My brother said that in high school, Jesus was his classmate that kept asking him (along with other friends) to buy booze for them.
 

Dentim

A boy in a playsuit.
Joined
Oct 28, 2005
Messages
3,904
Awards
4
Age
35
Dudes, you're all a bunch of f***ing liars! Jesus lives in my room here and he is totally not amused by this.
 

Ulti

hurr hurr hurr
Joined
Dec 17, 2003
Messages
10,987
Awards
4
Age
32
Location
In my castle, plotting your demise
What? FFFFFF I have to kill him again? Damn it, that guy just never gives in. Aye, oh well. Someone get me a shotgun, rope, gasoline, and a lighter. And if you can, a burger and fries. I'm hungry.
 

Marly

All right, don't have a crap attack
Joined
Nov 11, 2007
Messages
4,354
Awards
2
You just made me a believer.
 

ChocobosComet

Blinky KITTY!
Joined
Aug 7, 2008
Messages
2,881
Age
28
Location
Kiities?
Website
usagi-cho.deviantart.com
So I had an interesting conversation with a girl today.

She told me that Jesus spoke to her. He whispered in her heart. It was a soft soothing voice, which she described to be like a meeker version of my flamboyantly gay band teacher's voice. Right.

So I ask her what Jesus told her, and she said that he told her where to find something. She said that she had this sort of whisper deep in her heart, and she knew it was Jesus. So naturally, my curiosity led me to ask her what exactly she was looking for.

Her mother's $12. So apparently, Jesus whispered to her in her heart, in a flamboyantly gay voice, where her mother's twelve dollars were. What, did he say "look under the couch cushions?"

D':
I knew there was something fishy about an impoverish carpenter that traveled around with nothing but men. Interesting.

This Jesus makes me feel hope for a new future. He has arisen the end of days draws near! :D!

I'm sorry but, I lolled so hard at that. XD
 

Endgame

:D
Joined
Apr 21, 2005
Messages
3,777
Age
35
So I had an interesting conversation with a girl today.

She told me that Jesus spoke to her. He whispered in her heart. It was a soft soothing voice, which she described to be like a meeker version of my flamboyantly gay band teacher's voice. Right.

So I ask her what Jesus told her, and she said that he told her where to find something. She said that she had this sort of whisper deep in her heart, and she knew it was Jesus. So naturally, my curiosity led me to ask her what exactly she was looking for.

Her mother's $12. So apparently, Jesus whispered to her in her heart, in a flamboyantly gay voice, where her mother's twelve dollars were. What, did he say "look under the couch cushions?"

D':

What, you think he's going to roll out the burning bush or have an angel visit her for that shit?

He just outsourced to a gay angel.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top